Backstreet Mom: A Mother's Tale of Backstreet Boy AJ McLean's Rise to Fame, Struggle With Addiction, and Ultimate Triumph (36 page)

OUT ON THE ROAD, the boys' entourage had gotten bigger. It became
necessary to lease more buses to carry everyone, as family and girlfriends
spent more time traveling with the boys. That added to the ever-growing expenses. Sometimes it even led to problems among the five boys
when they had meetings or tried to discuss legal matters. In my opinion, having so many outsiders sitting in on those meetings with attorneys made the situation much too public.

Then disaster struck. Somewhere on tour, Howie lost his backpack.
In it were all of the legal documents concerning the lawsuit against Lou.
It did not take long for what had started out as a secret negotiation to turn into a public circus. The press got wind of the situation and reported on their difficulties in newspapers and on television.

Questions arose about the lawsuit and about Lou and management.
In a way, I suppose it was not a bad thing. It certainly prompted all the
concerned parties to more quickly reach a settlement. New contracts
between the boys, management and Lou were drawn up, following our
attorneys' guidelines.

By Thanksgiving, the boys and I left for New York to be in the Macy's
parade. While there, we had two meetings to formulate a plan for the
new contracts. One of the main topics of conversation was over management. Johnny's name was the only one mentioned. In addition, the
attorneys gave more details of just how badly the boys had been raped
at the original contract signing. We felt misled and betrayed by all of the
people we had trusted.

I felt as if I had gotten Alex into the biggest mess of his life. Every
instinct we as parents had felt during that original signing should have
been dealt with. There was only one thing that kept ringing in my head:
maybe I should have done this or that. Maybe if I had hired an attorney
to look over the deal, it would have been okay. Maybe if we had made
the record company wait, this never would have happened. If I learned
nothing else during those negotiations, I learned that no one could be
trusted. If something appears too good to be true, then it is.

I became increasingly cynical after that and even more suspicious of
everyone around Alex who claimed to be his "friend." I hoped that he
had learned some of the same lessons. Sadly, that was not the case. Again,
Alex depended on me to handle everything-and as usual I did. It did
not occur to me that I should see to it that he absorbed some of the
unpleasantness for future reference. It would have served him well in
the years to come.

One of the strange things that happened during the negotiations was
that Jive Records suddenly became our best friend. It was as if they were
happy to have management out of the way, so that they could come in
and take over the reins. At that point, the main players who dealt with
requests for the boys were Nina and me and, on a rare occasion, Johnny.
But by then, he was spending most of his time with *NSYNC and on his
impending divorce from Donna.

The boys grew increasingly unhappy about all the time Johnny spent
away from them. Their feelings were really hurt by his lack of interest in
them, both personally and professionally. There was a definite void in
their lives. It made them sad to know that they would never have his
undivided attention (and in some cases his friendship) again.

They compensated for their disappointment by burying themselves
in the ever-growing amount of work that lay ahead of them. The upside
of that year was that the boys made many strides in the U.S. They were
honored by their peers with music awards and they were embraced by
the media, especially television. They performed on all the major shows
like Regis & Kathy Lee, The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, Saturday Night
Live and more.

The hangers-on also came out in force. Whether people showered
the boys with gifts with the hope of receiving something in return, or
whether they did it in an effort to get the boys to sign endorsements,
inevitably each time a gift was given a price was attached. Maybe not
right away, but at some point someone had a niece, sister, cousin or
whomever who wanted passes to a show, or entrance to a meet-andgreet. People who had not shown their faces for years asked for free
tickets and backstage access.

The backstage area quickly became a three-ring circus made up of
what we affectionately called the "glommers." They were the people
who really had no business being there but had somehow managed to
weasel their way in. Howie suddenly had family in every city we visited.
It became a bit of a joke just how many relatives Howie seemed to have
hidden away. But, I must admit, most of them were usually very nice.

I suppose stardom affects everyone in different ways. Family members that we hadn't seen in years came to see Alex. It became part of my
job to make sure that during every show there was a VIP room set up for
family and friends. That enabled the boys to visit with them before they
went onstage. If we had those people corralled in a room, they were not
roaming the backstage hallways getting into trouble.

From the moment we arrived at our hotel, I would be on the phone
talking to the promoters, Nina, security, the record company, press or
whomever else I needed to deal with before we left for the venue that
afternoon. Usually, I arrived at the venue several hours ahead of the
boys to ensure that everything was in place. It was my job to find rooms
and set up passes for the meet-and-greets and VIPs, and make sure all
the boys' guests found their way backstage.

Once the boys entered the building, the chaos that ensued was my
daily nightmare. On very rare occasions I actually got to eat dinner with
Alex before a show. But he usually waited until after the performance to
get something back at the hotel. I would just try and grab a bite with my
photographer buddy, Andre, who had been with our little group for a
number of years. We had come to be great friends. He was so familiar
with the business that nothing much fazed him.

Andre was there to capture on film every event that appeared worthy
of a magazine story or cover. He worked independently and at his own
expense. That meant that, unlike the salaried crew, he answered to no
one but the boys. Andre had become my mentor in a way. There were
many times when I felt as if I was on my last thread of nerves. I could
always talk to him. In his wise way, he helped me work things out. We
shared some great times.

After the boys arrived at the venue, they played pool or basketball, or
ran a sound check, or had a meeting with the crew to go over mistakes
or changes from the previous night's show. Once the boys were done
with what we liked to call "the grip and grins," they were off to get
dressed and ready for the show.

After joining the boys for prayer, hugs and kisses before they ran to
the stage, I accompanied security out into the pit with the press. I made
sure that everyone got the shots that they needed during the first three
songs, then I led them out of the building. The record company rep
made sure that they disposed of their cameras if they returned to watch
the rest of the performance.

The crew had such a large amount of equipment to pack up and move
out that they had to start tearing it down as soon as the boys were on
stage. At the end of every show, the boys ran off and we wrapped them
in robes and towels as they scurried to their bus. The boys always did
one encore. After that, the band continued to play to make it seem as if
they were coming back. It was not until the house lights went on that
the audience realized the show was over. By that time, we were halfway
back to our hotel or on to the next city.

As the years wore on, I continued to refine the meet-and-greet process. Media access was limited to high-end magazines. Of course, I had
my issues with the media during those years, but generally our relationship was pretty stable. If a bad article came out, I found out who the
culprit was and they were dealt with accordingly. That usually meant
the boys would not grant them another interview for a very long time, if
ever. That did not happen with many magazines.

Everyone understood each other's place. The magazines needed the
boys on the cover and the boys needed the limelight. That being the
case, they trod lightly. During the interviews, I was always the heavy. It
was up to me to pull the boys out when they wanted to end the interview. All in all, I could probably count on one hand the times that I
fought with journalists or photographers or record company people over
the boys. I am very proud of the years when I was known as the tour
publicist for the Backstreet Boys.

THAT YEAR, THERE WAS AN INCIDENT that put a real scare into all of usBrian underwent open-heart surgery. As a child he had been diagnosed
with a heart problem. Luckily, it had not acted up for several years, but it
was something that he knew would have to be addressed sometime. That
time arrived when we least expected it. The boys were devastated when
they heard the news. Alex and I prayed on several occasions with the other
boys for his safe recovery. The media had a field day with rumors while he
was in the hospital and then later when he went home to recover.

The first rumor was that Brian was not returning to the group. That
escalated to a rumor that both he and Nick were quitting the band. No
one took much notice until some phony legal documents hit the news.
Then the record company started getting suicide threats from distraught
fans. At that point, the boys had no choice but to go on record and
squelch the rumors.

Around that time, my dad started having some medical problems and
that added greatly to my stress level. I called home every day, just to
make sure that he was doing okay. First, he had to have prostate surgery.
Because of his age and the fact that he had diabetes, his recovery time
was longer than normal. In addition, we were told that he had had a
couple of incidents that they called mild strokes.

Mom was extremely upset. I was thankful that she had my brother
and other family around her for support. I felt very bad that I could not
be there to help her. Dad's medical problems finally subsided, which
helped to ease my stress a bit. But the tension on the road was quickly
reaching crisis levels.

The boys were hurt by Johnny's apparent lack of interest in them. That
hurt was expressed as anger. There were countless fights between Johnny
and Brian when he went back out on the road. I was not sure how it
would all turn out. At the time, I recall thinking that Johnny was acting
very immaturely. Those boys had played a pivotal role in getting him
where he was. Actually, it was the six of them together (the five boys,
plus Johnny) who had worked so hard for the success they'd achieved.

Now that was over. The boys felt that they had been cast aside for a
newer version. Johnny didn't see the hurt underneath their anger. It was
as if he were not the adult in the scenario. Instead of sticking around to
work it out, Johnny spent more time with his new group and less with
the boys. There were rumblings of firing him.

Finally, the boys got fed up and gave Johnny an ultimatum: it's either
them or us. With that, Johnny chose *NSYNC and left. Abandoned yet again, Alex felt betrayed and confused. It had become painfully clear
that all the talk of our being "one big family" was merely lip service
when compared to the almighty dollar. It was a hard lesson for both of
us to learn. Again I felt that there were only a handful of people I could
trust. Most of them I was related to. The fact that Alex was slipping
further away from me made the hurt that much more difficult to overcome.

During the time that Brian recovered from his surgery, Alex moved
into his new house. He was able to relax and enjoy some downtime with
his new girlfriend, Amanda. She slightly resembled a younger version of
Elizabeth Hurley. Apparently, she had aspirations of being a singer. I
assumed that was what the two of them had in common.

I did not really know Amanda that well, so it was hard for me to
determine anything about the relationship. At first, she did not live with
Alex, since he made it very clear that he wanted to be on his own for a
while. They dated and spent a lot of time together, but in my eyes he did
not seem to have a real commitment to her. I was relieved, given the fact
that it had not been that long since the whole Marisa and Donna affair
had become a closed chapter. However, new problems lay in wait.

Alex spent more time with the glommers. That left less time for his
grandparents or me. Family functions became glorified meet-and-greets
to Alex. He would show up to make an appearance and then quickly
dash away to meet a "friend" for dinner or a movie. I tried to pin him
down about his new group of friends, but he never wanted to say very
much.

One friend that he did tell me about was someone that Alex had gone
to high school with (although Alex only went to that school for six
months). This young man had lost his mother not too long before running into Alex. He became Alex's golfing buddy, party buddy and eventual roommate. That was fine, except that this kid never shelled out one
single dime to pay for anything.