Bad as in Good (7 page)

Andre brushed past Loraine and grabbed Teona's forearms. “You think shit is funny, Te?” Andre's Pacific Ocean eyes slowly turned blood-red as the fluorescent streetlights showed off the black, weed-smoke residue on his heart-shaped lips. He squeezed Teona's arms as he pulled her close. “Gimme my shit.”

Loraine smacked Andre's shoulder and then pulled out her stun gun. When Andre noticed what Loraine had in her purse, he let Teona go and put up his hands. “Leave my sister alone.”

Afraid of where this night would lead, I turned Teona around. “If you have something that belongs to this man, please give it to him. We don't wanna end up on the news tonight.”

Teona stomped her foot. After going through her purse, she pulled out a gold watch with a diamond-encrusted rotating bezel. Andre swiped the watch from Teona's hand and examined it. Pleased with its condition, Andre blew Teona a kiss and then disappeared into the night.

“What the hell was that about, Teona?” Loraine asked as she put away her stun gun.

Teona shrugged her shoulders. “Same shit, different night.” With that, she walked toward the car. Loraine and I exchanged looks as my heartbeat steadied.

“Is she serious?”

Loraine shook her head. “Same Teona, different dang night. Let's go.”

W
hen I got home, I kicked my shoes off and headed for the wine bottle waiting on me. As I stood barefoot in my kitchen, I thought about gettin' nice and liquored up by making Amaretto ice cream floats and sippin' on Pink Moscato. Unfortunately, my plans were interrupted by a gentle knock at my door. I took a deep breath and glanced at the clock on my microwave. Taking a deep breath, I untied my hair and scratched between my tender roots.

When I opened my door and noticed Tariq's tall frame taking up most of the space in my doorway, it took my breath away. I literally held my breath as my eyes scanned the fine specimen before me. The last thing I expected was his haughtiness knocking on my door at four in the morning, especially after how we ended things. Still, my breath found it hard to come back as my eyes gazed over the way his nicely fitted button-down caressed his chest and his slacks gripped his body in ways that I only wanted to. I cursed myself for being jealous of men's pants. “What are you doing here?”

He licked his soft lips and gazed over my body. “I wanted to talk.” His deep voice danced off my eardrums and slid between my inner thighs. I squeezed the door and tried not to squeeze him.

“We have nothing to discuss. You're married, and I don't date married men.”

“That's what I want to talk to you about.”

“Save it for the next chick you try to screw over.”

“If I was tryna screw you over, I wouldn't be at your door tryna talk.”

“Talk? You're probably horny.” He sucked on his bottom lip and smiled. Yes, my knees quivered, but I folded my arms over my chest like his lip suckin' didn't do me any favors. “Like I said, save it for the next chick you try to screw over.”

“C'mon, Erin. It's not even like that. I can't lie and say I'm not thinkin' 'bout that when you standin' here lookin' sexy in skinny jeans, breasts all out, hair down—man's goin' be a man. But I did come here to talk to you.”

“About what?”

“ 'Bout what happened. I ain't wanna leave things like they've been.”

“It's been a month, Tariq. It's been left. There's nothing more to discuss. And as my outfit points out, I've moved on to other things.”

“Is that right?” Within seconds, his words were on my neck and his arms around my waist. I tried to push him away but his lips met my skin and I was lost in translation. His previous actions showed me we were over, but as his lips spoke dirty little nothings on my neck, all I could understand was how sweet his lips tasted when they touched mine. Before I realized it, we were in my apartment, trying to make it to the bedroom as quickly as our clothes hit the floor.

I felt so stupid for letting him do me like he did, but as soon as my panties hit the floor, I was his. I was his to lay himself inside of and my emotions were his to toy with. Nonetheless, in that moment, I needed him. I needed to feel a man as strong and as sexy as Tariq freak me right and assure me that the woman that
stared back at me in the mirror deserved to be pleased the way she needed to be pleased. And Tariq was the man who knew how to please.

“You can't stay here, Tariq.” I wrapped my legs around his waist so he couldn't leave. “We can't do this,” I assured him as I tilted my head back and let him suck the spaces below my chin that always sent shivers up my spine.

“You know you missed me,” he whispered in my ear as he pinned my wrists back and stroked his body on top of mine, He slowly satisfied me and forced me to reach my climax. “I came to make you come.”

A task he knew all too well. As if his dick was meant for my satisfaction, I needed it to do to me what I lay in bed alone hoping he'd come back and do. I was fooling myself if I thought I had any say over what was going to happen the moment he knocked on my door. As soon as he knocked on my door, our fates were sealed and we were destined to lie in my bed soiling my sheets with me begging for more—and he knew it.

“T
hat little girl brought home some random man.” Loraine stomped through my apartment pacing back and forth as she huffed and puffed. Loraine caught Teona sneaking some guy she met at the club that night into her home. Instead of being remorseful, Teona couldn't understand why Loraine couldn't accept her hustle. Two nights after my sexcapade with Tariq, I got a call at one-thirty in the morning that Teona dropped the bomb that Loraine was jealous. I didn't even have to ask. Teona would be out the door and Loraine would be two seconds away from knocking down mine.

I sat on the couch watching her, trying not to reveal the glorious night I had with Tariq. Tariq and I never really talked. I didn't get the answers I truly needed from him. Questions like,
Where's your wife?, Where's your son?, Why didn't you ever feel the need to tell
me?
were left hanging in the same spot where I asked myself,
“Why
do you always let him in?”
Either way, I came four ways 'til Sunday and damn sho' wasn't complaining. “You knew your sister wasn't an angel.”

Loraine placed her hands on her hips. “That does not excuse the fact that she met some man and had the nerve to invite this strange man to
my
house at one o'clock in the damn morning. I almost kicked him
and
her out my house
tonight
. That ho has two days before she's out.”

“Why didn't you?”

Loraine cut her eyes in my direction and stopped pacing. With her finger in my face, she clenched her jaw and said, “I sound like I'm playing, Erin. I'm pissed the fuck off. You think I ain't wanna kick the ho out my house? That man is definitely gone, but she's my damn sister, no matter how many strange men she lets lounge inside her.”

“You're taking it too far. I'm sure she's not a ho and—”

“How would you know? You saw how she was at the club. Flashing her tits around for free VIP and drinks. And then there was that mess wit' Andre. I dunno what that ho would do for jewelry, cars, and clothes. I don't wanna know.” Loraine ran her hands through her locs, and went back to pacing a hole into my floor.

When my phone vibrated, I couldn't help but smile at the text Tariq sent me.
“Miss u.”
Albeit short and sweet, it was a message that had me lit up for the rest of the night.

“What the fuck you smiling about? Did Teona text you?”

I tried to hide my glee by sucking my teeth and changing the subject. “Why would Teona be texting me? She's prolly at your place setting a blaze to all your things before she packs her things and leave.”

“Girl, please. That girl ain't crazy.”

“After you cursed her out and told her she had two days to find another place to stay, I wouldn't be surprised if she did.”

Loraine brushed that notion off and refused to let my text go. “Who's texting you at three in the morning then?”

“That's my business.”

For the first time since she stomped into my apartment, Loraine calmed down. She took a deep breath and relaxed her shoulders. “Look, my head's real out of it right now. I realized my lil' sister
was…different, but I tried to ignore the possibility that she might be this active to get the perks she's been receiving. You wanna know the reason why she felt justified to bring home some man she met at a club? Because he promised to pay off her student loan debt. This bitch is fucking for loan money.” Loraine plopped down on the couch next to me, shaking her head. “I'm not her mother, but why would she feel the need to bring this type of shit to
my
doorstep? I ain't that easygoing.”

“Ain't that the truth,” I joked.

Loraine slapped my thigh and rested her head on my couch pillows. She sighed and rubbed her forehead. “Forgive me if I've been difficult for the past hour but—”

“You ain't gotta explain nothing to me, girl.”

“I don't wanna get a call in the middle of the night about her, y'know?”

“I understand. I guess it's 'bout that time you two have a real sister-to-sister talk.”

“We do. I don't want her to blame her behavior on our dad not being around. I'm tired of hearing the excuses. I need her to be a woman and stop playing these reckless games. I had to give her an ultimatum, for the sake of our relationship. But, I guess I'll sit down and talk to her before she leaves.”

We sat there quietly. Loraine's head had to be filled with thoughts of her fast-tailed sister. My head was full of thoughts of Tariq. My phone vibrated again. It was Tariq; this time it was a call. To avoid the scolding, I tried to quickly silence it before Loraine caught wind. I would've gotten away with it if he didn't feel the need to follow up his missed call with another text that read,
“I need 2 c u.”

“Who is blowing up your phone, girl?”

“No one important.”

“Must be important enough. The first time you got a text, you were lit up like a Christmas tree. Now the calls are coming.”

I waved it off and shrugged my shoulders. “It's nothing, girl. I'm here to focus on you.”

Loraine sat up. “Listen, the last thing I wanna be doing right now is focusing on my problems. You got a new man or something? Who's blowing you up like this?”

I took a deep breath and stared at the wall. “Tariq.”

“What?” Loraine jumped up and put her finger back in my face. “Tariq, who?”

“You know who I'm talkin' about.”

“Married
Tariq? What's he saying?”

“Yes,
married
Tariq. He's not saying much.”

“Well, he must be sayin' enough 'cause you couldn't stop smiling when he first texted you. What's up, girl? You holdin' out? You and Tariq messin' around again.”

“He showed up the other night. I tried to resist him but…” I rubbed the throbbing skin between my eyes and then sighed. “It's nothing, though.”

“Is he still married?”

“We never had the chance to discuss that.”

Loraine stood quiet. I expected her to go through this entire spiel about how irresponsible I was being and how bad this was going to end. Instead, she quietly sat back down and shrugged her shoulders. “It is what it is then, I guess.”

“That's it? You ain't got nothing else to say?”

“Girl, I got my own problems to deal with. If this makes you happy, then do you.”

I
reached a turning point in my life. By the time I graduated from college, I had a plan for myself: find a job, develop a career, find a woman, and get married—all by age thirty. At twenty-eight, I was well on my way to marrying my woman with my career in tote. By twenty-nine, shit changed and my only goals were to make money and make moves. I lost interest in finding a suitable mate for myself; I was only interested in my next fix. I denied the pain that Deja had caused me by using easy women to cure the hurt; but easy women were only Band-Aids—nothing to heal me of my ailment truly. Still, I used them and abused them, and left no excuses.

When I met Simoné, I was impressed by her drive. Initially I was solely impressed with how tight her jeans fit and how intently the sun highlighted the small crevices of her mocha skin—the small of her back, below the calves of her long legs, and the folds of her eyelids that overlapped round eyes sitting on top of her taut cheek bones while peeking through her long, black bangs. When she spread her soft lips and said her name, “Simoné, pronounced
See-Mo-Nay
but spelled like Simone with an accent mark,” I smirked.

“I'm Riq,” I whispered in her ear as she touched my thigh in the back of a crowded soul food restaurant. Although the room was
packed with hungry ol' fools looking to pack their faces wit' collard greens and cornbread, I was only lookin' to pack my face with the moistness that sat between the thighs of the pretty mocha chick that sat in the back booth.

“How 'bout we get out of here? It's too packed in here.” She knew what she wanted and went after it. I recognized I was in trouble when I realized that I remembered her name. I was blinded by her bright smile and plump breasts that sat on top of her table. I should've seen that I was falling victim to the same characteristics she shared with Deja. Her sultry voice, beautiful eyes, and soft lips all reminded me of a love I tried to forget. Although I had yet to taste those lips, I could tell they'd be trouble once my lips got a hold of 'em.