Barely Alive

Barely Alive

Barely Alive

Book #1 Barely Alive Series

Bonnie R. Paulson

B&B Publishing

Bonnie R. Paulson

www.bonnierpaulson.com

B&B Publishing is owned by Bonnie R. Paulson and Brian L. Paulson

Copyright © 2012 Bonnie R. Paulson

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of the publisher, excepting brief quotes used in reviews.

This book is a work of fiction and any resemblance to any person, living or dead, any place, events or occurrences, is purely coincidental. The characters and story lines are created from the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This book may not be resold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to the purchase-point and purchase your own copy.

Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

ISBN-13: 978-1475078480

ISBN-10: 147507848X

Cover art designed by Katie Thomas, Spokane, WA.

Acknowledgments

To My Husband – I’d love you even as a zombie.

To My Critique Partners: Brooklyn Ann and Shelley Martin – couldn’t have done this without you! Thanks a ton!

To my beta readers: Connie (mom), Kammie, and Chelsea. Thanks for the enthusiasm!

Chapter 1

Dying sucks.

But knowing you’re dying is a freaking mind trip and I hated it.

My gray-tinted fingers shook. Putting down the empty milk container took all my will power and I honestly have no idea how I did it. Who was I kidding?

“
Paul. I need you to grab the new recruits and join us off Flamingo tonight at eleven. Don’t feed them. I want them raring to go.” Dominic’s smile had lost its charm. He’d stopped beguiling me once the virus had taken hold. He knew I couldn’t go home. I’d never return to my family when I could harm them so easily. Plus, they were human – the enemies – self-righteous, capitalists without any real idea of need or purpose.

One thing Dominic had taught me was I could still care, even while I hated. He was my first two-sided coin.

I nodded. What else could I do? He was my master now. My general. And I would do what I was told or he’d lock me in with the dissenters and refuse me my final release. I would do anything for the answer.

I shut the fridge and grabbed a cookie from the counter of the cafeteria kitchen. My previous three-thousand calorie diet didn’t cut it anymore. Downing nine to eleven-thousand calories a day barely staved off the hunger sting unless it was meat. Raw meat. But cows were hard to come by in the Nevada desert and I wasn’t desperate enough to eat the feral cats. Those things were scrawny and all hair. I still had enough control I didn’t jump anything that moved.

Like people. Oh, man. And people smelled the best, too.

Flamingo. Hell, what did Dominic think we were going to win down there, casino jackpots? I licked the crumbs from my fingers, no longer amazed I barely tasted the crap I ate. Everything tasted like dust – unless it was meat. The sweet coppery taste of blood. Ah.

In the back room set up like a large bunkhouse, fourteen guys waited.

The first few weeks at the compound were always sun-filled with Dominic’s promises of gold, powers, and strength. Immortality. Overcoming the evils of the nation – of all the nations – became the fodder that fueled us. We’d rule America.

But once he infected you… me. I became a tool. I lost my “shiny, new toy” appeal to Dominic. He no longer catered to me or the other guys in my group. No more pictures of women, no more games or toys, no more anything… except food. That’s the one thing I couldn’t complain about. A twenty-four-hour buffet filled with treats and food I used to crave, but surprisingly sparse in the one thing I wanted. What all the guys wanted. But we didn’t have the balls to complain to
him
.

“
Paul. Hey, when do we get to eat? I’m starving.” Steve, a red-headed sixteen year old, approached me. He was an inch or two shorter than me, but stocky and twitchy. I hated twitchy, reminded me of my brother. Who, while I hated for being human, I hated worse for being lost to me.

“
Yeah, about that. Dominic said we can’t eat until after our mission this evening up on Flamingo.” I held up my hands but eyed the group as three of them stood, fingers balled at their sides. “I know you’re hungry. I do. But hang in there. We can eat tonight. I’m hungry too. I don’t get to eat until you do, okay?”

“
Maybe we don’t need to wait for Dominic.” The newest member, John, spat our leader’s name. “He can’t stop us from leaving. We’re stronger than he is. He’s human.”

I contained my groan – no need to start doing that until my faculties had begun deteriorating. I still had ten weeks before my body failed me. Dominic had eyes and ears everywhere. He had an omnipresence achieved with technology his money purchased, but I still hadn’t figured out how.

John and Steve stepped toward the doors followed by the three murmuring amongst themselves.

From the opposite end of the large room, Dominic pushed through double doors. “Going somewhere, boys?” He crooked his finger at us. “I have something to show you.”

I cringed from the bite in his words. I’d been on the tour. But because I was there – with them – I’d have to go again.

John squared his shoulders, assured of his superiority over Dominic who was only human after all. We’d all been fed the same information on the inferior aspects of being human. Hell, it was why we’d left that way of life behind. John lifted his still-peach colored chin. He’d been injected no more than two days ago. Rookie.

“
Yeah. We’re leaving. This is a bunch of crap. We’re hungry but we can’t eat until we do what you say? Who the hell are you? You’re just a
human
.” John glanced at the four boys who’d been prepared to leave with him. “You want us to go steal stuff, give it to you, and then what? Wait? For you to decide on what to do next? That’s a waste of my power and I’m not waiting.”

The others nodded slowly, doubt pinching their brows together.

Dominic’s dark, slicked back curls grazed the white collar of his button up dress shirt, shining in the sunlight as he crossed under the windows. Mid-day didn’t irritate us anymore than midnight did. We didn’t sleep but dang, the hunger. His green eyes had narrowed.

I bit the inside of my cheek. Holy crap. I didn’t want to go on the tour, hear the lecture and the only two options I had. Not again.

“
I understand what you’re saying. But, before you go, boys, let’s go downstairs. I’d like to show you what you have to look forward to.” His gaze found mine and I swallowed, my tongue like sandpaper. He didn’t need any more of my pride. He’d taken everything else.

Each of the other guys followed Dominic through a different set of doors to the stairs. I trailed behind. My stomach hurt, from more than hunger. Staying busy had staved off the reality of the situation, but trips downstairs or reminders from Dominic cut into my hyper-sensitized skin like small paper cuts on fingertips.

Thick, windowless walls framed the stairs. The façade of upkeep ended at the bottom. Cement flooring and steel doors lined the hallway. Thick brick work supported the doorways and made up the rooms we’d be peeking into.

Queuing up at a doorway twenty feet from the bottom of the stairs, the boys waited for the great reveal. A new door, one I hadn’t yet seen inside. Each one was different, held a different monster.

“
Paul, get the door.” Dominic’s icy voice washed over me.

Claustrophobia would follow the reveal, and some of the newbies would try to escape the truth. I shut the door and the automatic lock clicked into place. I had to adjust my footing. Some of them would come at me in desperation and who knew if they had more strength than me.

Dominic tucked his hands behind his back and pushed his chest out. The fresh scent of his flesh filled the small space. Sweat broke out on my skin. I hadn’t eaten meat in a few days.

“
So you want to leave, huh? Think you can take my gift and just run away? That doesn’t sound very grateful, boys. Sounds to me like you need an attitude adjustment.” His smile had chilled vastly from the warm, inviting grin he’d welcomed us with.

The distinct edge of the group’s confusion coated their jerky movements and shifting feet.

“
You don’t have all the answers still, gentlemen. Would you like to see what will happen, if you up and leave?” Dominic arched his brow in challenge.

John stepped forward, his bravado courageous considering he had no idea what waited for him behind the steel door. “Sure. It can’t be that bad.”

And with that statement, I did groan. Idiot. Nothing – I repeat – nothing is worse than what Dominic had locked behind that door. Nothing. It didn’t matter what stage of deterioration the poor animal was in, the horror was unfathomable.

Dominic’s smile regained a dose of his humor. “It’s not that bad for
me
. Not at all.” He swung the door open, releasing an odor reminiscent of a dead skunk rolled in sour milk and tossed with rotten eggs.

I opened my mouth the smallest amount to breathe through. But the odor changed to taste and the sudden wish for dust-flavored cookies coursed over me.

John looked through the opening, curiosity pushing his shoulders forward. But he looked for a moment and then recoiled from the hole, stumbling backwards into his friends. Horror opened his mouth.

Dominic pulled each man to the doorway and made them look their fill. He motioned me forward, I was the last. And I nodded. Of course I’d look in, too. I was his current leader. It was my job to set an example. But I knew what to expect, so I prepared myself against falling backwards or gasping or any of the other surprised reactions of the others.

Two steps, one. The smell strengthened as I got closer.

Inside, Tom, my mentor, huddled against the wall, his labored breath groaning from inside his chest. He coughed and, seeing me, stumbled to his feet. Arms outstretched, he stepped forward, yanked back at the last second by a clinking chain manacled around his bare and bleeding ankle.

Rotting skin fell off in different sized patches, some as large as a playing card and some smaller than a quarter. Milky coverings created partial cataracts over his eyes. One ear had been torn off and chunks of hair stuck to his fingers. Dark, raw bite marks covered his arms, but from the angle on his greenish skin, they had to be self-inflicted.

I froze. I’d liked him. So much. He’d been honest and felt bad for us. He’d snuck my group raw chicken when we’d first been changed. He’d done more, but how could he have been caught? Everything else had been done away from the compound. It didn’t matter. Whatever slight he’d been caught in had been enough to damn him.

“
This will be you, if you don’t do exactly what I say.” Dominic spoke slow, letting the reality sink in. He narrated with the skill of a story teller. “Your body will die around you and your mind will keep living. I’m the only one who knows how to release you from this. I created it and I can end it. But that’s only if you do what I want. Exactly what I want.”

Wincing, I turned from Tom. I couldn’t save him. I couldn’t even throw him a chicken. He’d rot in that room, fully conscious for as long as Dominic wanted him to be. Nothing I did would help him. But my efforts could make things worse – or the same – for me depending on how you looked at it. Ignoring the plea in Tom’s gaping mouth and shaded eyes was the only way to ensure I didn’t end up like him. And the rest.

Dominic sized us up, meeting each of our gazes… one at a time. I couldn’t hold my eyes steady and looked away too soon. Something in our faces must have told him he hadn’t convinced some of us because he turned to another door.