Authors: J. Lynn
T
he doctors released me the following afternoon with a prescription of pain meds in case I got any headaches or if the pain became too much, but after sleeping almost the entire night curled up against Jase in the narrow bed, my body felt surprisingly better than the day before. Sure, there were some aches and I was moving at the speed of a three-legged turtle, but I was okay.
I was better than okay. I was alive.
Mom and Dad looked like they wanted to cart me off home as I stepped out into the cold, but I wasn’t going home with them when they left their hotel room later in the week. I was going back to my apartment.
Jase waited patiently by his Jeep, his hands shoved deep into the pockets of his jeans as he leaned against the door.
“Honey, I really don’t want to leave you right now.”
I turned to Mom, giving her a hug. “I’m okay. Really. I just want to go back to my place and chill out.”
“With him?” Dad grumbled, eyeing the guy that he’d always welcomed into his home without a single thought.
I sighed. “Yes, with him.”
“Is he your boyfriend now or something?” he asked, and I had no idea how to answer that question, because I wasn’t sure where we were, which did not go unnoticed by my father. A thoughtful look crept across his face. The kind of look bad things sprouted from. “Maybe I need to talk to him again.”
“No,” I said quickly. “You do not need to talk to him. At all.”
Dad looked like he was about to disagree, but Mom placed her hand on his back. “Call us later, okay? Just to check in.”
“I will.” I figured I’d probably only have a couple of hours at the apartment before Cam swung by to check in. I would be facing a lot of impromptu check-ins for a while.
After another round of hugs and tears, they let me go and I joined Jase. He pushed off the Jeep and opened the door for me. “I think your father looks like he wants to take me hunting.” He took hold of my elbow, hoisting me up. “Like a special, scary hunting trip where I’m the game.”
I giggled. “You know, you’re probably not too far off with that assessment.”
“Great.” He closed the door and jogged around the front. Climbing in, he shot me a look. “Your dad used to love me.”
That much was true. “That’s before he suspected there was something between us.”
“Something between us?” he murmured thoughtfully, and I tensed. He didn’t speak again until he pulled out of the hospital parking lot. “There’s definitely something between us.”
I didn’t know how to respond to that, because what I wanted between us was something he’d been unwilling to deal with a few weeks ago, but then there was yesterday and what he’d said before he climbed into bed with me.
Jase reached over, taking my hand, and we didn’t speak on the way back to the apartment. There was something soothing in the silence, and I took the time to gather my thoughts.
He found a parking spot close to the entrance in University Heights, limiting the time in the brisk, cold air since I was sorely underdressed. Cam’s truck was in the lot and as we reached the landing to our level, I could hear Avery’s laughter coming from inside her apartment.
“Do you think he’ll propose soon?” I whispered.
Jase nodded as I unlocked the door. “I bet he’ll do it over Christmas.”
That would be perfect, but I also had a feeling that he’d just spring it on her instead of trying to plan it again. Either way, I knew she’d say yes and they would have a happily ever after.
My happily ever after? I was still praying that it was possible, that it was about to happen.
I stopped just inside Cam’s apartment. Correction. Our apartment. I’d probably never get used to thinking of it that way. Looking away, I soaked in the familiar worn couch, the big-screen TV that my brother had splurged on. The game system and half the stack of games was gone, relocated to Avery’s apartment. Emotion clogged my throat when I glanced into the narrow kitchen and saw the baking sheets sitting on top of the stove. I limped slowly forward, feeling heavy and weighed down by what had happened.
Jase closed the door behind us and placed his hand on my shoulder. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” I nodded for extra emphasis. More like I needed to hear myself say it. “It’s just I didn’t know if I’d ever see this place again.”
He turned me so I faced him as he cupped my uninjured cheek. His features were sharp with unspoken emotions. Fear. Adrenaline. Relief. Our gazes locked, and I knew in that moment he was feeling what I was. A future had almost been lost and we were on the cusp of a second chance, and the realization was shattering.
“I need you.” His voice was guttural with the depth of what he admitted. “I need you right now.”
There was no doubt in my mind with what he wanted. I needed the same. “Yes.”
Jase’s hand shook as he pressed a kiss to the corner of my lip and then to the hollow of my cheek. His lips met the skin below my ear, causing me to shiver. A hot, wet path trailed down my neck and then back up. A strangled cry escaped me when he nipped on my earlobe. A throbbing ache between my thighs caused desire to blossom inside me, but it was love that was swelling, fueling the fire licking over my skin.
“I want this,” he said, sliding his hands down my sides. He gripped my hips. “I want you always.”
I looped my arms around his neck. “I want you.”
Jase made a deep sound in the back of his throat. “I could
almost
live on hearing those words.”
“Almost? What could you live—?”
He lifted me up, his broad hands cupping my ass as he walked me backward. Whatever I was about to say was lost as he pressed my back against the wall beside the couch and ground his hips into mine as he kissed my throat. I wrapped my legs around his waist, the position allowing him to wedge himself between my thighs.
My eyes drifted shut as I craned my neck, giving him access. And he took it, nipping and licking as his hips thrust into mine, driving me insane with the rising anticipation.
Jase lifted his head, kissing my chin and my mouth, avoiding the area that was tender to touch. I moaned as he pushed my cardigan off my shoulders and cupped my breast through my shirt. My nipple immediately pearled, sensitive and pulsing. A spark of acute pleasure darted from the tips of my breast to my core. His hips rolled into mine, hitting a sweet spot that had me crying out.
“I’m sorry,” he growled against my mouth. “If this is too rough, if this hurts, you’ve—”
“It doesn’t,” I assured him, digging my fingers into his shoulders. My body was sore, but the needful ache to be with him was far stronger. “I won’t break.”
“Damn good thing to hear.” His hands trembled as they circled my waist, betraying how tightly wound he was. “Because you’re the kind of toy I plan to play with for a very, very long time.”
I arched a brow, and he sent me a wickedly mischievous wink as he extracted my legs from around his waist and settled my feet onto the floor.
“I wanted to talk to you first,” he said, tugging my cardigan off, tossing it to the floor. At this moment, talking was so overrated. “Before it got to this, but I can’t wait. I need to be in you.” He wrapped his fingers under the hem of my shirt. “If you don’t want that, you stop me now and I will back off.” His eyes, a liquid silver, met mine. “I’ll do whatever you want me to do. If you want to talk, we’ll talk first. If you want me to get the fuck out of your face, I will, but if you tell me to stay, I’m going to be so deep inside you, you’ll think I’ll never come out again.”
My entire body dampened, liquefied at his words and his deep, husky drawl. I was out of my league with him sometimes, but I was wholly ready for him.
“But know this,” he continued, stepping closer so that our thighs touched. “I made a huge mistake by pushing you away. I was a fucking coward, too scared of being hurt again, and I was hurting the moment you walked away. I did that to myself and to you, and I’ve never been more sorry in my life about anything.”
I caught my breath as I soaked in what he was saying and what it meant for us, but nothing prepared me for the rush of emotion his next words opened up in me.
He dropped his forehead to mine and with a silky soft kiss, he gently parted my lips, working his velvety tongue against mine. “And I’m more than willing to spend the rest of my life making it up to you, because I love you, Tess. I am so fucking in love with you in a way I’ve never loved someone before.” His eyes glittered with hunger and love. “Please let me prove that to you. Please, Tess.”
A flutter picked up in my stomach, and my heart rate accelerated as I stared into his beautiful eyes. He’d said he’d loved me once before, but that had come at the height of lust, and those three little words had been lost in what happened after that. These words meant everything now, and that was all that mattered. People made mistakes all the time. God knows I was a pro at doing and saying the wrong things. And Jase had made a mistake, but if he was willing to make up for it, I was willing to let him try.
I was willing to let him love me.
My knees were weak and I had no idea how I remained standing or was able to force out the one word. “Stay.”
Jase closed his eyes briefly. “Fuck yeah.”
My shirt came off with a startling quickness. The boy had talent when it came to removing clothes. He splayed his fingers across my ribs, just below the white lace of my bra. My skin flushed as his stare devoured my partial nakedness.
“You’re fucking gorgeous, and I am so fucking lucky.” He kissed the valley between my breasts and then each swell “But there’s another part of you that’s even more beautiful.”
Jase kissed my stomach and then his tongue dipped into my navel as he lowered himself onto his knees. My back arched off the wall, sucking a breath and holding it until my skin tingled.
He reached down, easing my feet out of my sneakers and then removing my socks. He grinned as he held one. “Elves? On socks?”
“It’s close to Christmas.”
“Cute.” He tossed them over his shoulder. His nimble fingers found their way under the sweats Cam had picked up for me to change into. As Jase slid them down my hips, my pulse pounded. “There we go,” he said, kissing just below the band of my cotton panties. A rush of wetness hit me. He peered up through thick lashes. “You know how I like to eat sweet things.”
“Oh God . . .”
With a deep chuckle, he hooked his fingers under the band and tugged them down. I was almost naked and he was completely clothed. The difference made me feel vulnerable as he rose like a predator. His hands slid around my back, unhooking my bra. With his teeth, he drew the straps of my bra down, grazing my skin in the process.
Stepping back, he admired his work. “God, baby, you blow my mind. Look at you.” He placed a tanned hand on my hip, anchoring me as his head dipped. The edges of his soft hair brushed the swell of my breast, heightening my nerves.
But then he drew my nipple into his hot mouth, and every nerve in my body flared. I gasped as pleasure rolled through me in tumultuous waves. My fingers dug into his hair as his free hand slipped between my thighs, fingers brushing over where I throbbed with every fast heartbeat. I moaned as my head fell back against the wall.
He lifted his head, nuzzling my neck, just above my shoulder. “I love you, Tess. I love you so much.”
My body clenched. Hot, tight shudders racked me. His fingers were barely touching me, and I was already close to falling over the edge. “I love you, Jase.”
“Say it again,” he murmured against my cheek. “I need to hear you say it.”
“I love you. I love you.” I repeated it over and over, lost in pure sensations. My hips surged forward, grinding against his thigh and his hand.
A satisfied smile split his lips. “Fuck, I love hearing that.” Pleasure spiked as he slipped a finger inside. “God, you’re so wet.” He growled low in this throat as he smoothed over the tight concentration of nerves. My body jerked in response and was flooded with heat. “You like that?”
“Yes,” I whispered, panting. “Very much so.”
His dark hair tickled my nipples as his lips drifted over my collarbone. A tiny feminine sound caught in my throat as he knelt on his knees once more, easing my legs wide until I was completely exposed to him. Lightning rushed through me as his tongue glided from my navel to my center.
“So sweet.” He kissed my inner thigh. “So beautiful.”
The air left my lungs as his head lowered again and he sliced me open with his tongue. I shuddered, my fingers clenching and unclenching in his hair. He captured my flesh with his mouth, alternating between determined strokes of his tongue and sucking deep as if he needed my taste to survive.
I cried out, hips thrusting against him as he worked me quickly to release. The fierce heat built and then exploded. I couldn’t breathe as every muscle locked up and waves and waves of pleasure rolled through me, and he kept on, holding me up with his hand as he soaked up every response until the aftershocks died off.
Jase rose then, his lips moist and swollen as he drew me to his chest. His eyes burned with lust and love when he cupped the nape of my neck, titling my head back. The length of his hardness burned through his clothes, pressing against my stomach.
“Now I’m going to make love to you.”