Beast Machine (24 page)

The group sat there quietly
blinking at Owlbert. They were taken aback by such a sadistic, yet
elaborate, plan. “Would the plan even work? What would happen if
something went wrong? How would Gora convince the doctor to leave
without being noticed?” Several thoughts ran through their heads at
warp speeds.

“
Vas is it?” asked Owlbert.
He cocked his head to the side and stared at the group
contemplatively.
Click, click, click
went Owlbert’s beak during the long silence. He
attempted to snap his fingers, but, again, he failed.

Gora looked as if she was
about to speak but twisted her hands and head slowly. She looked at
each of her creations then looked at her feet. “This is a good
plan,” she thought. Gora looked up and directly at Owlbert, who was
still clicking his beak.

Click, click,
click.

“
Well, it’s honestly a
malicious, brutal plan,” said Gora quietly. Owlbert shut his eyes.
He couldn’t believe she was going to deny his plan. “But I fucking
love it!” Owlbert’s eyes opened instantly and a large smile came
across his face.

Gora stood up and ran over
to hug Owlbert. It couldn’t be seen but Owlbert’s owl-cheeks turned
a rosy red out of the flattering comment. The feathers around his
beak curled more than usual. Owlbert was awfully used to using his
mind for the greater good, but now he could use his mind to act
demented – in limited situations.

“
I’m not sure how to
drive?” said Tubman. “Now I can ride a horse or steer a carriage,
but don’t know how to drive. I never got the chance to drive an
automobile.”

“
I can handle that part,”
nodded Hitbear to the tiny mammal. Tubman smiled and nodded
back.

“
I’ll think up a plan to
lure her out there, and you three can work out any kinks of the
overall plan, okay?” asked Gora.

“
Yeah!” said the group as
they stood up and stretched out their animal bodies. A
collective
yawn
was
had amongst the group.

Hitbear went to grab a map
of California from Gora’s massive collection. He was struck again
by a memory of his former life. It forced him to kneel down next to
the maps.

“
Adolf, if you don’t do as
The Flagship says, you will be killed – sooner or later,” said a
woman with curly, dirty-blonde hair. She wore a black medal-less
military uniform.

Hitler grabbed the woman by
the face. He gripped her face tightly and said, “I will never be
overtaken! They helped build me up and now I’m going to tear them
down! Germany will be the world power humanity needs! I am the king
the world needs! The world is full of stupid, lazy humans and I
will guide them to better lives!”

He shoved her away. “How
can we live in a world where you hate most of the inhabitants?” she
pleaded. “Genocide isn’t guiding them anywhere. Please, Adolf,
compromise with The Flagship – help them raise the beast from the
catacombs in the Alps. They’ve put all of their resources into the
Allied Powers!”

Hitbear crumpled down on
his stomach. Not one member of the group reacted to his fall, as
they assumed he was just tired. He writhed gently and gripped his
own skull hoping to rid his mind of his inhumane
memories.

“
I will not be associated
with that monster of a man,” whispered Hitbear to himself. “I
am
not
that monster
anymore. I am
not
that man.”

Chapter 23

Opening
Statements

Steenburgen grabbed her
opening statement binder from her bulky purse that was covered with
pictures of cats. It was hideous and smelly. The binder sat under
the chair in between Chairman Obelis and Southwyck.

Southwyck let out an
audible, “Jesus Christ,” in reaction to the stench. Chairman Obelis
just stared at the podium where Steenburgen would be beginning her
opening statement. He had his typical bored look stretched across
his face.

She took a deep breath and
began to speak, “Thank you, Bella Vistans, for having me here,
tonight.” She spoke without any breaks; she must have been saving
her energy for this moment. “I’d also like to thank my mother and
my close friend, Shelly Gunderson, for helping me now and in the
future on this campaign!”

The crowd yawned. They had
already made up their minds, it appeared, and were just waiting for
Southwyck to speak. Two pairs of hands could faintly be heard
clapping, likely from mother Steenburgen and Shelly Gunderson.
Steenburgen gave her strange half smile.

“
To begin my opening
statement, I’d like to state that we are all Arkansans and we all
love this state more than any other thing in the world, except
almighty God of course!” She pointed toward the ceiling. She
appeared to be trying to appeal to the large Christian base in
Bella Vista. “My plan to set Arkansas straight is all about
Love
AND
Charity
. I have been
criticized, unfairly, before the race even began: for my weight,
for my thoughts and for my plans for this wonderful state of
ours!”

Chairman Obelis was puzzled
by her mention of God, as he thought the woman was likely an
Agnostic person, or just merely a ‘spiritual’ person. “Why would
she sacrifice her beliefs like that? Would the Christian base
really be that against a person with a lack of faith? Would that
same Christian base be fooled that easily?” His thoughts
flittered.

“
We must love each other
for my plans to work! Thank you: that is my opening statement.”
Steenburgen returned to her chair and withdrew a large canteen. The
canteen had a picture of one of her cats embroidered on one side.
No one knew what was in the canteen, but it couldn’t be a healthy
beverage.

The crowd, Southwyck and
Chairman Obelis were confused by Steenburgen’s short opening
statement. It wasn’t much of anything other than proving that she
could speak without having to gather her thoughts after three
words. Southwyck and Chairman Obelis stared at one another with a
strained and collective befuddlement.
Creak
went several chairs in the
audience as everyone looked around at one another, wondering, “What
the hell was that supposed to be about?”

“
Well, um,” muttered the
announcer, “Thank you, Miss Steenburgen for your… your marvelous
opening statement that did not even come close to the allotted
time.” The announcer removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes with
one hand. With his hand still in his eyes he said, “Now, Mr.
Southwyck, would you please give us your opening statement?
Preferably, an opening statement closer to the allotted
time?”

“
Sure thing, chief!”
Southwyck stated loudly as he rose from his chair. He looked over
at Chairman Obelis with a shit-eating grin and winked.

The crowd, now
rip-roarious, clapped as Southwyck walked toward the podium
assigned to him and adjusted his microphone.
This
was their guy. He was going to
lead them to economic prosperity
and
he was a state hero, how could he do any wrong?
What about his poor personal track record? “Forget-a-bout-it,” they
all thought. “He wouldn’t let
us
down like that!”

“
Like my democratic
opponent, the lovely Miss Steenburgen, I’d like to thank Bella
Vista, and their wonderful citizens for having us here in this
wonderful town of yours. I’m not sure who this, uh, Chairman Obelis
fella is, but I’d like to thank him too!”

Southwyck turned, again,
toward Chairman Obelis with a shit-eating grin fashioned on his
chubby mug. Chairman Obelis smiled back with restrained
friendliness. Steenburgen didn’t flinch when her name was
mentioned; she was so used to be taunted about her weight, looks
and breathing problems that whenever her name was mentioned by an
opponent or non-friend, she rarely reacted.

“
Unlike my democratic
opponent,” continued Southwyck, “My opening statement will contain
substance – and not the fatty kind of substance she shovels into
her mouth six times a day!”

The crowd burst into
laughter. Not only was
their
guy a former football star,
their
guy was hilarious! The humor,
albeit tasteless, was easing the tension in the crammed gymnasium.
Steenburgen, again, didn’t flinch at the jab from
Southwyck.

“
My three point plan will
save Arkansas from this rut that the liberals and godless
fornicators put us into!”

The crowd stood up and
applauded loudly. Only Jeffrey, the white-haired man and the
announcer remained seated.

“
PIG SOOIE!” went the same
fellows as before.

“
Settle down, settle down,
let him speak,” said the announcer. The crowd sat down, but their
excitement levels were palpable.

“
Point one: Lower taxes for
the job creators. This one is pretty simple; I’m not sure how the
Libs keep messing this up! How the hell can they give people jobs
if they’re giving all their profits to the federal and state
governments in the form of taxes? They can’t! We must lower their
taxes to as low as legally possible because if the job creators and
their companies are ever going to hire
you
or
your
children
they are going to need as much
money as possible, right!? It only makes sense!”

The crowd stood up once
again and applauded loudly, some even whistled in an approving
tone. “Pig sooie” calls could be heard, but were drowned out by the
loud clapping.

“
Quiet please, let him
finish,” boomed the announcer louder than before. Only half of the
crowd listened to the announcer, while the other half stayed on
their feet waiting for the next jolt of excitement from Southwyck’s
plan.

“
Point two: jail those that
insult Christianity and our lord! So many times, especially my days
at University of Arkansas – GO RAZORBACKS!” The crowd cheered
loudly and once again the annoying “Pig sooie” calls could be heard
diffusing through the crowd.

Chairman Obelis was growing
irritated by the constant pig sounds during a political event. The
sour look on his normally bored face said it all. He couldn’t
conceal the disdain he had for the idiocy of some in the
audience.

Southwyck continued on his
second point, “So many times, I would be around heathens that would
try to spite Him, insult Him, and take His name in vain and a slew
of other unchristian things, including the devil’s work like
homosexuality, adultery and abortion. I was so uncomfortable around
those heathens and thugs, but I couldn’t do a damn thing about it
because of the law protecting
them
and not
us
and our wonderful Christian God! The
only
God!” Southwyck
reached both of his arms towards the ceiling as if he were hoping
some divine intervention would occur. “God will help save us from
our troubles! But we must protect Him here on Earth.”

The crowd stood up once
more and cheered loudly. A handful of Bella Vistans in the crowd
screamed vile, unchristian things like, “Kill all the faggots!” or
“Jews to jail!” or “No Sharia Law here!” or “Fuck the Libtards!” It
made the white haired man and Jeffrey thoroughly uncomfortable.
Southwyck had gripped the crowd tightly with his flabby fist and
refused to let go.

“
Please quiet down,” droned
the announcer loudly, but to no avail this time. The crowd would
not listen to him any longer. They were too riled up about the
prospects of Southwyck’s three point plan.

“
Point three: Bring back
hanging, the electric chair or firing squad as an option for the
death penalty! Why should murderers and rapists be given a
humane
death? Did they
give their victims a humane death or a
gentle
rape? No! Give the people the
power to help their lord – our lord – smite those that have wronged
Him and our fellow Christians! Heck, we could even bring back
public stoning if the people want it! Or if the Bible tells us
so!”

The crowd went crazy with
applause and louder pig sooie sounds. The scene was similar to a
Baptist Megachurch after a preacher gave a sermon, or a controlled
riot of joy seen at Klan rallies, or an Arkansas Football game
after a game winning touchdown. Chairman Obelis felt uneasy in that
moment. His look of sourness gave way to a look of hopelessness.
Not hopelessness that he would lose – no, he would win regardless
of what Southwyck says – but hopelessness in humanity.

He knew that the people of
Arkansas, especially rural Arkansas, were likely to hold
conservative values, but he didn’t think that they would be so
supportive of this sort of insanity. Bringing back the electric
chair? Foisting religion on
everyone
in the state? Blaming Jews, Muslims, Liberals and
homosexuals for Arkansas’s troubles? Madness. Maybe he will have to
use the Carda Implant on all of them? “Yes I must,” he
thought.

“
Thank you,” said the
announcer over the thunderous crowd. “Thank you, Mr. Southwyck for
your opening statement. Those were quite the, uh, messages to send
to Arkansas and her citizens right away!” The announcer placed his
glasses on the table and used his sleeves to rub the sweat off his
face.