Beautifully Damaged (31 page)

"I don't want you anywhere near him, either. Please don't ask me to sit back and watch you put yourself in potential danger. Don't ask me to do what you won't do yourself."

His smile was very tender as he ran his finger along my jaw. "Fair enough. How about we take them to Clover for dinner?"

"Perfect."

"Alright, I'll send Vivian an email and let her know." He reached for my hand as we started down the street again. Thinking of Clover had me wondering about his other businesses.

"What are the names of your other restaurants?"

"Coq au vin."

"You own Coq au vin?"

He looked down at me with a grin. "Yes, why have you been?"

"No, but I bet it's fabulous." Coq au vin was the most sought after restaurant in the city with a six month waiting list. I had always wanted to go but, outside of the long wait, it was just way too expensive for me. Trace pulled me over to a storefront before turning to me as a smile tugged at his mouth.

"Would you have dinner with me at Coq au vin?"

"Oh. My. God. Yes!"

He chuckled at my very enthusiastic answer as he reached up and tucked a lock of my hair behind my ear; his finger lingering to gently trail a line down along my jaw.

"When would you like to go?"

"You don't have to wait?"

"No, I have a table."

"Oh." And then the thought of being one of many, just another in the revolving door that was his table at Coq au vin, sort of dampened my spirits. Being the avid mind reader that he was, he cradled my face in his hands and spoke with quiet sincerity, "I've only ever brought Chelsea to Coq au vin and that night at Clover with Heidi was the only time I'd ever brought a woman there and that night I was there to see you."

He could see that I was confused and added, "Ask Natalie. I specifically asked to be seated in your section. Heidi had been such a bitch to you that night because she knew that our date was to be just dinner. I was there for you, Ember. My interest was only for you."

I just looked at him like he had grown another head as I tried to process his words. He hadn't gone home with Heidi that night and for some reason knowing that made me feel really good.

"I may have been a player but you're the only woman with whom I've shared my bed, both sleeping and making love in it. I never brought it home, Ember."

Tears burned the back of my eyes as I held his tender gaze. "Thank you for telling me that."

"From that first night at Sapphire, it's been you, Ember -- longer actually."

I narrowed my eyes at him as a coy little smile touched my lips.

"What about the babe from that first night at Sapphire that you were so thoroughly entertaining?"

He actually paled, which took me completely by surprise, before he offered quite seriously, "I watched over you for a long time and in that time I fell a little bit in love with you. There was an innocence about you, something taken from me at a very young age, and I was drawn to it and you. When I met you that night at Sapphire, I realized what it was about you that drew me to you wasn't just in my imagination. You were a blend of contradictions and just a bit unsure of yourself to make it all so fucking endearing. I knew, even after that very brief meeting, that you were the one person who could get passed my defenses to touch the damaged man I've tried very hard to hide. That woman by the restrooms was my attempt to purge you from me by being the man everyone believed that I was. When you saw me, I couldn't look away, but I wanted you to see me for what I was so that you'd protect yourself from me and in so doing you'd be protecting me from you. Even that woman I brought into Starbucks, I only brought her there because I knew you'd be there. I wanted to see you but I also wanted to push you away."

A smile touched his lips when he added, "When I caught you following me I think I knew then that the battle I was fighting to keep you from me was a pointless one."

Trace had never been so forthcoming with his feelings. I held his tender gaze as I said, "I never bought your image, Trace, never believed you were the man you wanted everyone to believe you were. I'd caught a glimpse of the man under that facade and I liked what I saw, a lot."

"And thank god for that," he said in a near whisper.

I wrapped my arms around him and he pulled me close before I said, "I have a confession, Trace." I looked up into his eyes before I continued, "That night at Sapphire, I was fantasizing that it was me you were stroking to climax."

His eyes burned hot and his voice was a sexy purr when he said, "Any time, Ember, absolutely any fucking time."

"Oh, god."

He grinned before he pressed his lips to mine, a kiss filled with promise, before he reached for my hand again. I was so lost in my happy thoughts that when Trace spoke again it took me a minute to realize he was still answering my original question.

"I also own Noir but I recently sold that since there's another club that I wanted, almost irrationally so."

"Really, which one?"

He smiled before he added, "Sapphire."

"You own Sapphire?" I stopped walking and turned to him as I remembered our private hour at Sapphire. I punched him affectionately in the stomach as I grinned at him. "You know the owner."

He laughed as he pulled me closer to him.

"I had to own the place, Ember, because it's not just where I first met you but also where I was given a second chance with you."

I felt myself going all gooey inside because of both his words and the tender look on his face as he said them. It was thinking on his words that had me realizing I had an answer to a puzzle.

"That's why you were at Sapphire that night with Dane."

"Yes, I was finalizing the deal."

"Lucky for me, you were there that night."

"It's more than luck, Ember." Before I could ask him to explain that comment his mouth fused to mine and seconds later I forgot my question.

Trace dropped me off at home before he headed off to the gym for a few hours. The man was relentless but I very much appreciated the results of his working out efforts. I showered, changed into my comfy clothes, and curled up on the sofa with a glass of wine and a book.

A few hours later, Trace came home and just hearing the key in the lock had my heart rate speeding up. I wondered if I'd always feel that involuntary excitement at the thought of seeing him; I suspected I would even when we were old and gray. I turned in my seat so I could see that face when he entered the apartment. As soon as the door opened, his eyes found mine as a smile pulled at his mouth.

"You look comfortable," he offered as he closed and locked the door.

"I am. How was the workout?"

"Good, but I am in serious need of a shower."

"Okay. Can I make you anything for lunch?"

He walked over to me, leaned down, and kissed me hard on the mouth before he replied, "No, thanks."

I watched him disappear down the hall as I marveled over how that man loved me. I tried to read but my thoughts were on Trace, more specifically Trace naked and wet. I moved down the hall to the bathroom but, when I pushed the door open, Trace was already out of the shower. A towel was wrapped around his waist but his chest was bare so I took a moment to enjoy the view. His eyes found mine in the mirror as a wicked grin touched his lips before he said,"Took you long enough."

My feet had a mind of their own as they carried me into the bathroom, stopping only when I was right behind him.

"You're beautiful." I said in awe as I pressed my palms to his shoulders and slid them slowly down the hard ridges of muscles on his back. He turned to me but he made no move to touch me. I wondered about his restraint until I looked up into his eyes to find that they were burning with desire.

"You don't mind me touching you like this?"

His voice was raw when he replied, "No."

He studied me for a minute and must have seen the sadness in my eyes when he asked, "What are you thinking, love?"

I splayed my hands over his pecs and savored the feel of his hard, warm skin before I lifted my tear-filled eyes to his.

"Why the tears?" he whispered.

"When I think about you as a beautiful little boy and the violation of trust, it breaks my heart and makes me so angry. How can you stand anyone touching you?"

He framed my face with his hands before he offered softly,"You said once that you thought I used sex as a way of seeking value and maybe I did. In the past, I didn't mind when women touched me because they were only touching my body. Never, in any of my experiences, did a woman touch something in me that went deeper than the flesh, until you. My soul ached for you, Ember, long before we ever made love but the truly humbling part is that your soul ached for me, too, and not just my body but all of me. Even now, you still love me when you know all the worst things about me. You own me, Ember, body and soul and I crave your touch both inside and out."

His confession rocked me to my core and humbled me that this beautiful human being loved me so much. I knew he thought that he was the lucky one but he was so wrong about that. "I do love you, Trace, everything about you but I also admire you, respect you and am in awe of you."

A slight smile touched his lips as he brushed his knuckles across my cheek. I held his gaze before I added, "Did you know that I always wanted that, too, someone who knew the worst about me and still loved me?"

"Worst about you? I see only perfection when I look at you, Ember."

"No one's perfect."

"You're pretty fucking close."

"Sweet talker."

His hands wrapped around my face as his mouth sealed over mine. I reached down for his towel and pulled it from his hips. He whispered against my lips. "Touch me, Ember."

My hands wrapped around him as I ran my fingertips up and down the valley of his spine. I felt as his body hummed under my touch as I moved even lower to shape my hands around the hard muscles of his ass. He pressed himself closer to me as my hand found its way to the hard length of him that was pressing against my stomach. He moaned into my mouth just before he pulled me down onto the bathroom floor.

Charles and Vivian were very receptive to dinner and so, about a week after Trace and I discussed it, we were at Clover being seated; Charles and Vivian had not yet arrived. Trace held my chair for me before he folded his large frame into the chair at my right. He turned to me, as soon as he was seated and offered softly, "You look stunning tonight, Ember."

I preened over the compliment as a slight blush tinted my cheeks which had a lascivious grin pulling at Trace's mouth before he added, "...even more so now."

I felt oddly shy as I whispered, "Thank you."

My dress was gray: a satin under dress with a lace overlay. The lace sleeves were long and flared, the hem reached only to mid-thigh and on my feet were four-inch strappy sandals. My hair was upswept into a knot and small diamond chandelier earrings, a graduation gift from my dad, hung from my ears. Trace reached for my hand to brush his lips over my finger tips -- his eyes watching me as he did -- and just like that the shyness fell away. He saw the difference as he lowered my hand, yet still held it, and offered, "That's better."

Our waitress, Cindi, came over to take our drink orders.

"Hi, Ember. It's nice to see you on the other side of things tonight."

"It's nice to be on the other side of things. Cindi, this is my boyfriend Trace." I noticed her look of appreciation but I couldn't blame her since Trace dressed in a black suit with a crisp white shirt and a tie in the color of his eyes, yeah, he looked altogether yummy.

"Hello, Trace," she offered shyly.

"Hello, Cindi."

She blushed, clear up to her hairline, and I had complete sympathy for her since I had a similar reaction when first meeting Trace. I had to give her credit though she recovered quickly before she asked, "What can I get you to drink?"

"We'd like a bottle of the Chateau Montelena Estates Cabernet Sauvignon 2008, please." Trace said which had my jaw almost, but not quite, dropping since that was Clover's most expensive bottle of wine. Cindi's expression matched mine before she managed, "Very good."

I watched her leave before turning my attention to Trace but he was watching only me. He touched a lock of my hair that had fallen over my shoulder as he looked at me. "Only the best for you, sweetheart."

"Have you ever had that bottle before?"

"I have, yes, and based on your taste in wine I think you're going to love it."

"I love you."

He smiled, a beautiful smile, but I noticed when it faded as his attention moved to something behind me as his eyes grew cold; Charles and Vivian had arrived. Trace stood as they approached the table; his body was rigid and his jaw was tight. Vivian offered an overly cordial hello to which Trace responded with a curt reply. He helped seat Vivian in the chair to my left before turning his attention to Charles. They shook hands as a matter of formality before they both took their seats.

Cindi came over then and the next few minutes were filled with Trace tasting the wine, approving it, and glasses being filled. Charles looked over at me and smiled after Cindi departed.

"Hello, Miss Walsh, it's very nice to see you again."

I couldn't say the same so I refrained from doing so and only smiled in return. Vivian oblivious to, or because of, the tension started talking to fill the silence.

"Charles and I really do hope that this can be the beginning of many gatherings between us."

Trace offered Vivian no reply and instead he turned his attention to Charles and asked, "So what is it you really want, Charles?"

Charles had the sense to recoil; it was slight but definite before he replied, "I didn't do right by you back then and I'm trying to make amends."

Trace's hand clenched into a tight ball which had me reaching for it and covering it with my own. He immediately turned his hand so he could link our fingers but his hard stare never left his uncle. I knew what he was thinking because I was thinking it also, too little too late. He said as much when he did finally reply.