Bent, Not Broken (7 page)

J
oker pulled away
from the woman he loved and saw her glistening tears. “I’m going to spend some time with dad and leave you alone for a little bit. I’m not going away, Amy. We’re in this together.” He pressed another kiss to her lips, rejoicing when she kissed him back. “We’re going to work through this together.”

“He’s really dead?”

“Deader than dead, baby.”

“And you’re not going to be put away for his death?”

He chuckled. “I’m not going to be put away for anything. I promise you. Everything is in the clear. I made a deal with some guys at the club.” He stroked her soft cheek, wishing she hadn’t been hurt before. Joker would gladly take her to bed and make love to her but she wasn’t ready.

“Your club scares me.”

“The club keeps me sane, Amy. They’ve kept me grounded for a hell of a long time.”

“But they kill people and I don’t know if I can handle that.”

He held her head between his hands, staring down into her eyes. Compared to him she was so small, delicate, and soft. Joker knew he’d have to take care of her, love her with every part of him when he finally got her. She was the only woman he’d ever loved and even though he’d fucked plenty of women in his time, none of them ever compared to this sweet, delicate woman in his arms, even though he had never slept with her.

Fuck, he was a goner, and he’d never actually tasted her. He didn’t have the first clue about how tight her pussy would be, or the sweetness of her cream as she came on his face. Amy was his woman, had always been his, and yet there was so much for him to learn about her, and learn, he would.

“Without them, Amy, I’d have been dead long ago. I couldn’t have you. We didn’t do anything that night all those years ago, yet I knew I’d hurt you. I couldn’t live with myself. When I met Demon, I was dying inside. You’re my life, Amy. The club is part of me, and I love them like the brothers I never had. Trust them the way you trust me.”

She placed her hands over his. “I’ll try.”

“You’re stronger than that asshole, baby. Stronger than anyone I’ve ever known. We can do this and we’re going to do it.” He pressed another kiss to her lips, but this one far more demanding than the other. “I’m going to speak to my father. Get some sleep and I’ll join you soon.”

He eased her away, making his way out of the room before closing the door behind him. Resting his body against the door, he stared up at the white ceiling with the single light bulb glowing down at him. His cock was rock hard, begging for him to go back into Amy’s room and fuck her.

Not now. Take your time and give her a chance.

If he walked back into that room to her frightened screams, he’d regret it. The only screams he wanted to hear were hers calling his name in utter pleasure.

Joker forced himself to remember that night their kiss got out of hand, the way she’d fought him as he led her back toward the bed. All of it came crashing down around him and cut off all his pleasurable thoughts. His cock deflated and, after taking a deep breath, he left her door and made his way downstairs.

His father was waiting for him at the table.

“I made you a coffee; I figured you’d need it.” He pointed to the cup on the table.

“Thank you.”

“Are you going to be staying awhile?”

He glanced over at his father, seeing his slight weight loss along with his grief. The loss of his step-mother had hit his father hard.

“Yeah, I’m staying. I’m going to lay my cards out here, Dad. When I go back to the clubhouse, I’m taking Amy with me.”

“Reese—”

“No, don’t cut me off. I mean it; Amy’s mine. She has been mine for a long time. You know this.”

“I promised Brenda when I married her that I would always keep Amy safe. I can’t let her down. Amy’s all I’ve got of Brenda now.”

“I killed him, Dad.”

Silence fell between them. Staring at the man he’d loved his whole life, the same man he admired and respected, Joker waited for him to speak. His father, and even Amy, could call him Reese, but he wasn’t Reese anymore, he was Joker, VP of the Soldiers of Wrath, and he wouldn’t change. So much had happened in his life that he didn’t even know if it was possible to change. The only thing that had remained the same was his love for Amy.

“What?” David asked.

“I killed him: Amy’s father, the fucker who ruined her childhood and put her into years of nightmares and therapy. He’s gone, and he’s never coming back. You don’t need to protect her anymore. Amy’s protection is my job. It’s time for you to go out and find someone for yourself.”

David cut him off laughing. “What the fuck has happened to you, son?”

“I grew up.”

“Killing men doesn’t make the problem go away. Bruce hasn’t been around for years, and Amy’s still fighting what he did to her. It’s not just going to go away because you killed him.” David slammed his hand down on the table. “Amy’s delicate. She needs to be cared for.”

“And you don’t think I’ve got it in me to care?”

“I don’t think you’ve cared about anything for a hell of a long time. Soldiers of Wrath, Demon, and the crap related to the club have been your life. I love you, son, always have and always will, but you’re not coming into Amy’s life with the intention of taking her away. You do that and you’re going to send her on a downward spiral. I won’t let that happen.”

“I love her. She’s all I think about, all I care about. You’re not going to keep her from me.”

“Then you better show me that you’ve got her best interests at heart. I don’t mind you being here. Just don’t rush Amy. She needs to have her life and live it, and you need to respect that.”

Joker clenched his teeth together, angry at himself and his father. His father was right, but then he was always right and that just pissed Joker off.

“I’ll stay.” He picked up his coffee, finding it lukewarm. Swallowing down the dark liquid, he nodded at his father before heading back to Amy’s bedroom.

Entering the room and finding Amy already fast asleep in her large bed, he removed his jeans and shirt. He’d been so long without her that he wasn’t going to spend another night not sleeping with her.

He was down to his boxer briefs and climbed into bed, making sure he didn’t make any sudden moves. He didn’t want to wake or frighten her. Wrapping an arm around her waist, he moved in closer, molding his body against hers.

“I’m going to love you for the rest of our lives. I’ll give you everything, and if anyone tries to hurt you, I’ll kill them.” He kissed her temple, resting his head near hers, and breathing her in.

For the first time in years, he closed his eyes and slept.

Amy slowly became
aware of the warm body behind her. Turning her head, her heart stopped pounding when she saw Reese asleep next to her. Breathing out a sigh, she allowed herself to just look at him. In sleep he appeared much like the boy she’d known growing up. There were no frown marks or hard angles decorating his face. He was completely relaxed. One of his arms was underneath her head while the other lay across her waist.

This was the first night in months that she hadn’t woken up frightened. She must have been really tired not to notice when he crawled into bed with her.

“You’re awake,” he said, opening an eye.

“How did you know?” she asked, smiling.

“You moved, and baby, you’re not a light mover. You tug on the bedding and shift a hell of a lot. There’s nothing covert about you.”

She giggled.

“That’s a sound I could get used to.”

“Why are you in my bed and not your own?”

“Do you remember what happened last night?” he asked.

Amy thought about last night and her heart started to pound. “You’re not going anywhere?”

“No, I’m not. I’m not going anywhere and I’m going to stay here until you’re completely comfortable with me. This is the bed I’ll sleep in. I’ll be there to meet you after work.”

“You’re not going to back away?”

“No, not even if you beg me to.”

Amy licked her lip, pulling away from him a little. Reese stopped her from moving by tightening his hand on her waist. Should she call him Reese or Joker? She didn’t know what to think.

“I need to go to the bathroom.”

“You’re not running from me.”

“I’m not going to run, but you’ve got to admit this is pretty damn confusing.” She moved off the bed, making her way toward the bathroom.

“It’s not confusing, baby.” He moved toward the edge of the mattress, sitting up. She couldn’t help but glance down. His penis pressed against the front of his boxer briefs. Amy swallowed past the lump in her throat. He was huge.

“I need to use the bathroom.” Opening her bathroom door, she sat on the toilet, and her thoughts returned to Reese. “Stop it,” she said, scolding her mind.

She squealed when he knocked on the bathroom door, her nerves running wild.

“Yeah?” she said, clearing her throat after the words left her. Her face felt bright red at the fact Reese could come in and see her on the toilet.

“Can I come in?”

“No.” she said right away. “Hold on.” She finished going, flushed the toilet, and washed her hands. She opened the door and saw Reese leaning against the frame, his arms crossed over his chest.

He grabbed her hands in his in the next second. “You’re going to be mine. I’m not going to leave here until you’re by my side on the back of my bike.” He gripped her hands even tighter. “I’m not expecting you to be all right with this straight away, but with time, I want us to be more.” His thumbs stroked across her skin. “Nothing you can do or say is going to push me away. I know what happened to you. I know what Bruce did to you. Look into my eyes, Amy.”

She did as he ordered, unable to look away from him.

“Everything with us is real. I love you, baby.” He placed one of her hands over his heart. “You’re in here and nothing is going to push you away. Tell me you understand.”

“I understand.”

He pressed a kiss to her lips. “No pressure, no pushing, we’ll take our time together.”

She smiled as he pulled away.

“You’re gorgeous even when you’re embarrassed.” He chuckled, leaving her alone.

Turning and staring at her reflection, she blew out a breath.

It’s all going to be okay.
She wanted to be with Reese and if that meant learning to accept him and the club then she would.

“You can do this, Amy. He’s gone and nothing is ever going to happen to you again.”

She found her hand shaking. This is what she hated the most. One part of her wanted to give herself over to Reese, to have what she’d witnessed that night all those years ago with the other woman. She wanted to give in and to know what it was like to be kissed, loved, and desired. However, another part of her was scared. All she’d ever known was fear and pain. Her mother and her therapist promised it would take time, but she’d be able to live normally. How could being frightened of everything in life be living normally? So far, she hadn’t been able to allow herself to experience new things, and she knew it was because of fear.

Fisting her hand, she was determined to ignore that inner fear and try. The bastard who was supposed to love and protect her would no longer be allowed to rule her. Her father was dead and she would learn to live life to the fullest.