“The other surprise is that I received early acceptance, which means I'm entered in the summer program.” Chloe took a deep breath. “So I'll be leaving for New York on Monday.”
The air whooshed out of Lily's lungs. She froze amid the chorus of congratulations. Chloe was leaving on Monday? Only two days away.
Panic snaked through her system like an insidious vine. Her carefully laid plan was crumbling before her eyes. She needed time to think. She needed oxygen.
“Excuse me,” she whispered to Nick, and turned to push her way through the group of people and out the front door. She stumbled down the stairs on shaky legs, gulping in the fresh air.
Get it together, Lily. You can't fall apart now.
She paced up and down the lawn, waiting for a measure of calm to return.
“Hey, you OK?” Nick's face mirrored concern as he came down the steps.
She pushed the hair off her forehead. “Yeah. Just a bit of a shock.”
He joined her on the lawn, still looking puzzled. “But it's great news. A full scholarship is nothing to sneeze at.”
“Of course, and I'm happy for her.” She paused. “I just thought I'd have more time.”
The evening air held a chill. Lily rubbed her hands up and down the satiny sleeves of her blouse for warmth. Her mind raced with a million thoughts. She had no choice now. She'd have to tell Chloe the truth before she left on Monday.
Nick studied her, a strange expression on his face. “You're not thinking what I think you're thinking, are you?”
Lily couldn't quite meet his eyes. “What do you mean?”
“You're not thinking of telling her about your connection?” His voice rumbled with a hint of warning.
She opened her mouth to deny it, but the lie stuck in her throat. She owed him honesty, even at the risk of his displeasure. “I can't let her go without knowing, Nick. I just can't.”
He stared at her, open-mouthed. “I don't believe this. You promised me, Lily. That day at Rainbow Falls.”
The pain and fear in his eyes tore at her soul. “I promised not to say anything
yet
. I always planned to tell her before she left for college. I just didn't expect it to be this soon.”
Nick's expression darkened. “So my aunt's health means nothing to you. You don't care that this will probably kill her.”
Lily squeezed her shaking hands together. “You're exaggerating.”
“Are you willing to take that chance? Because I'm not.” Nick stepped forward and gripped Lily's arms. “You don't have to do this. Chloe cares about you. She'll keep in touch. And you can visit her in New York.”
Lily shook her head sadly. “Friendships don't last when people move away. Especially one so new. If Chloe knows I'm her sister, it will change everything.”
Nick dropped his hands as if he couldn't bear to touch her. “Did you ever stop to consider what this revelation will do to her? You'll turn her world upside down.”
She lifted her chin. “Chloe deserves to know the truth. Trust me, it's no fun finding out you've been living a lie your whole life, no matter how well-intentioned the deception.”
Nick threw out his arms. “This is coming seventeen years too late. We can't change what my aunt and uncle decided back then. Chloe will be furious at her mother for keeping this from her. Aunt Sonia will never survive that.”
With nothing to offer that would help the situation, Lily remained silent.
Nick raked his hands through his hair as he paced. At last he stopped and faced her again. “When you really love someone, their happiness becomes more important than your own. You put
their
best interests first. This is your chance to do the right thing, Lily. Think of Chloe and Aunt Sonia. Put them first.”
His eyes beseeched her, tearing the scabs off her scarred heart, re-opening old wounds.
Guilt. Always more guilt.
She'd had enough from her father to last a lifetime. Her conflicted emotions beat a painful pulse at her temples. “No one has ever put
my
needs first, Nick. Now, I'm going to do what I have to do. For me.”
He stared at her, disappointment etched in the lines on his face. She turned away as the energy drained out of her like a leaky tire gone flat. She couldn't face going back inside but didn't want to ruin the rest of her sister's big night. “Tell Chloe I had a headache. I'll call her tomorrow.”
When he didn't answer, she headed to her car without looking back, unwilling to watch Nick's love die before her very eyes.
Â
Â
Â
Â
24
Â
The next morning, Lily picked at her piece of toast and barely sipped her coffee. She should be at church, but in light of her falling out with Nick, and her confusion over the situation with Chloe, she couldn't face it. She needed the next twenty-four hours to make up her mind.
Never had she felt so tormented by a decision. Her strong feelings for Nick, as well as her concern for Sonia Martin's health, urged her to remain silent, but she could not give up her goal of claiming her sister. The past thirteen years since her mother's death had been a living nightmare. Yet she'd survived it allâevery painful incident.
And over these past few months, she'd found a shred of hope to cling to at last. But now her one living blood relative was about to walk out of her life. Didn't she deserve this small piece of happiness?
She sighed, thinking longingly of Nick. If he loved her so much, why couldn't he put
her
happiness ahead of his aunt's and cousin's? Chloe would get used to the reality of her true identity soon enough. She might be upset with Sonia for a short time, but Chloe had much too generous of a nature to hold a grudge for long. In the meantime, she and Chloe could bond as sisters. If only Nick could understand how much she needed this.
Nevertheless, Lily could understand Nick's point of view. Why couldn't she wait until a better time to tell Chloe? But who knew how long that would take? By then, Chloe might have forgotten all about her. Found new friends, a boyfriend, a whole new life that Lily might not fit into.
No, she couldn't risk it.
Lily got up, threw her toast in the trash, and sought solace in her artwork, hoping the answer to her dilemma would become clear. This time, however, dabbing colors on a blank canvas did little to quiet her mind. Her thoughts returned over and over again to Nick and Chloe. Frustrated, she cleaned her brushes and packed away her supplies.
With nothing left to lose, Lily turned to the only source of comfort she hadn't tried. She sat in the middle of her bed, closed her eyes and began to pray.
Lord, I haven't done this in a very long time, but I'm asking for Your help now. I'm trying to understand why You would let me find Chloe only to have her slip out of my life so soon. Is it wrong to want to acknowledge her as my sister? Am I being totally selfish? Please help me make the right decision. Amen.
When Lily opened her eyes, the room appeared the same. No magic solution came to mind. Still, it felt good to be able to pray again. To believe someone or something could be on her side.
A loud rapping on her front door startled Lily from her thoughts. Her heart picked up speed as hope poured through her. Was Nick here to work things out? When she looked at her watch, hope turned to disappointment. No, Nick would still be in church.
The knocking became louder, more insistent. Dread slid through her veins as she shot off the bed. Who could that possibly be?
“I'm coming. I'm coming.” She hurried down the hall, pausing to smooth back her hair before opening the door.
Sarah Jane stood on the landing, hand poised to knock again.
Lily frowned. How had she gotten in the front door? Had Maxi let her in?
Sarah Jane lowered her hand and lifted her chin. “I need to speak with you.”
Without waiting, the woman pushed past her into the apartment. Lily huffed out an annoyed breath and closed the door. Today of all days, she did not need Sarah Jane's hostility.
“Have a seat.” Lily pointed to the living room on her right.
Once inside, Sarah Jane perched stiffly on the high back chair, while Lily took the sofa. The hard gleam in Sarah Jane's eyes did nothing to ease her anxiety.
“What are you doing here, Sarah Jane? Shouldn't you be in church?”
The girl patted her skirt into place. “I left the service early to find you. We have important issues to discuss.”
Not again. Sarah Jane just couldn't let go of her fantasy relationship with Nick, no matter how many times Nick told her it was over.
Sarah Jane leaned forward in her chair, an unpleasant smile stretching her thin lips. “I want you to leave Rainbow Falls for good. And when you hear what I have to say, I'm sure you'll agree.”
Â
****
Â
Nick walked into the kitchen, his shoulders sagging to match his mood. He tossed his keys onto the table with a loud sigh. Lily hadn't shown up at church this morningâwhich meant she'd only been going to please him, and because of their argument last night, didn't feel she had to keep up the pretense. Or maybe it was her way of punishing him. Either way, God wasn't in the equation, and Nick needed to keep that in mind.
He rubbed a hand over his chest where a dull ache had settled. There had to be a way to fix this mess, but the answer escaped him. Even prayer this morning had failed to ease his anxiety.
Somehow he'd have to pull himself together before tonight's dinner with his aunt and cousin. For their sakes, he'd pretend nothing was wrong. That his life wasn't falling apart around him. He slapped his palm on the kitchen counter. The dirty cups jumped and clattered like his unsettled nerves.
Lord, please show me a way out of this dilemma. Help me find a solution that will keep everyone happy. And Lordâ¦draw Lily to You and guide her to make the best decision for everyone involved. Amen.
The shrill ring of the phone pulled him upright
.
Maybe after a night of reflection, Lily had come around to his way of thinking.
Instead, the gruff voice of Ted Baker boomed through the line. “Nicholas, you left before I could speak with you.”
Nick stifled a groan. He could not deal with Ted right now. “Sorry, sir. I have a lot on my mind today.”
“I've set aside an hour for us to meet tomorrow. I can't wait any longer for your decision.”
Nick's mind whirled with uncertainty. His answer, once so irrevocable, now wavered. “Tomorrow's not the best time for me. I have to see Chloe off at the bus depot.”
He was stalling, but hoped to gain a few more days. He needed time to settle things with Lily first.
“I've already spoken with Sonia. The bus doesn't leave until four o'clock. We'll have plenty of time before then. Meet me in my office at two-thirty.”
Nick closed his eyes, a feeling of doom washing over him. “I'll be there.”
Â
****
Â
Tension coiled in Lily's torso like the old springs in her couch, making it impossible to remain seated. She sprang to her feet and stood, arms crossed. “Why would you think I'd ever leave Rainbow Falls?”
Sarah Jane stared at her, unblinking, like a cat waiting to pounce. “I had an interesting visit with your father the other day.”
The blood drained from Lily's head and pooled into the soles of her feet. She grasped the back of one of the wingback chairs with shaking hands. “You have no idea who my father is.”
“On the contrary. I know exactly who he is. Reverend Tobias Cunningham of Fielding, North Dakota. A charming little town just east of Bismarck.”
Lily's body went numb. She counted to ten, trying not to panic. Losing control was not an option. “How did you find him?”
“With help from Mike Hillier. It wasn't too difficult. Oh, don't worry. Mike doesn't know what I've found, but he willâif you decide to stay.”
Lily swallowed hard. She knew Mike was suspicious of her, but never thought he'd take it this far. “I see. And why do you think finding my father would make me leave here?” Sweat trickled down her ramrod spine as she waited for the woman's response. Each second seemed like an eternity as Lily focused on the ticking of the mantel clock.
Sarah Jane picked some lint off her brown tweed skirt. “Call me crazy, but I don't think you'd want Nick to know you're a fugitive from the law.” She paused and shot Lily a look of pure venom. “Wouldn't do for a minister to be associated with a wanted criminal, now would it?”
Lily's hand flew to her throat.
“That's right. I know all your dirty little secrets.” She let the insinuation hover in the air for a moment, seeming to relish the effect of her words.
The room made a slow spin around as Lily clutched the chair to keep from falling. Her legs, as limp as noodles, barely held her up.
God help me. What do I do now?
Sarah Jane rose in an unhurried fashion and fixed Lily with a hard stare. “Unless you want Nick and the rest of this town to find out all the sordid details of your past, I'd suggest you start packing. Immediately.”
Something in the woman's smug, self-righteous smirk snapped the thin thread of Lily's control. She flew forward, rage shooting adrenaline through her body. She itched to enjoy the satisfaction of physical release and to see the fear in her opponent's eyes...
With a jolt, Lily pulled herself up short. Though every impulse begged for vengeance, Lily would not stoop to violence. She'd be no better than her father.
She lowered her clenched fist to her side. “Get out of here. Now!”
Sarah Jane did not seem fazed as she strolled into the hallway. With a hand on the door handle, she turned to shoot one more dagger at Lily. “You have until tomorrow night to be goneâor I tell Nick everything.”