Between Love and Lies (28 page)

“Cora.” The woman was searching for a way to make good on her threat to kill Noah.

“I’ll handle her,” Noah said.

“I hope you can handle Wardell as well, because he was my visitor.”

Her dread turned to panic and tormented her heart as well as her stomach. How had she forgotten about Wardell?

“What did the puffed-up partridge want?” Noah’s voice rang with anger, clear as a church bell.

“He said he’d followed the madam to my doorstep. Said she wouldn’t answer his questions about Miss Sullivan’s health. When I said I couldn’t either, he vowed that we’d all regret deceiving him, but that you—” his gaze finally met hers, “—would regret it most of all.”

CHAPTER 17

Noah sat behind
the jail’s desk, trying to focus on cleaning his revolver rather than staring at Sadie. She stood by the window, a few short strides away. Her freckles no longer lay stark against skin as pale as death. The dark circles under her eyes had faded.

She could use more rest, but her health didn’t consume his every thought. Nevertheless his mind was under siege. He longed to kiss her again…along with a dozen other sinful activities.

The light of the midday sun caught the highlights in her hair, making her red mane glow more beckoningly than he’d ever remembered. Lord, she was pretty.

But her spirit captivated him strongest of all. Her grit and determination was worth more than every dollar in Dodge. He grimaced when he recalled trying to buy her company for a meager hundred.

She stole a look at him before she went back to scanning Front Street—for threats, she’d informed him earlier. “You’re not still stewing about the doctor’s visit yesterday, are you?”

“Haven’t thought ’bout him all day.” That was the truth. He’d been trying to figure out how to get her out of Dodge in an honorable way. No luck there.

“He wants to help. He’s not like Gertie or Cora.” A frown pinched her brow. “Or even John. That man I can’t figure out in the least. But I’m certain the doctor means well.”

He stifled his sigh. He’d forgotten the downside of that determination he admired. He respected Rhodes’ attempt to make amends, but he hadn’t been able to set aside his anger over the magnitude of Sadie’s suffering during her withdrawal from a medicine the doctor had supplied.

He couldn’t forgive the doctor or himself for putting her in danger.

“Good intentions aren’t enough,” he muttered.

She folded her arms. “Are you saying you believe he’ll betray us?”

“Not knowingly. I agree that he means well, but I’ll require a helluva lot more than that before I trust him with your life.”

She turned to face him. “Sometimes it takes time to know if you can trust someone.” Her lips remained parted as if she wanted to say more.

His blood surged in his veins, urging him to get up and kiss those lips. He forced himself to stay in his chair. He’d vowed to show her what true honor meant.

She’d confessed that she wanted to leave Dodge a free woman. He’d make that happen. He hadn’t figured out how, but he would.

He’d prove to her that he was honest and trustworthy and dependable. He swiped the rag along the barrel of his revolver, punctuating each quality he needed to show her he was the man she wanted to stay with…once she was free to make such a choice.

Seeming to suffer from her own internal agitation, she began pacing. She briefly disappeared inside the other room then, as she passed the cell, now open and empty, she trailed her fingers along the bars and peered inside. Then her gaze came back to him. And so did she.

She perched on the corner of the desk. Head tilted to one side, a tentative smile curved her mouth. Not the false smile he’d remarked on when he first met her, but a genuine one, however small.

If he didn’t put some distance between them, and soon, he’d scoop her up and haul her straight to his bed again. He holstered his gun and crossed to the potbelly stove to pick up the coffee pot instead. “Can I pour you a cup?”

“Remember what I said when I was ill?”

Sweet Jesus, he recalled so many things. The memories weren’t helping him keep his vow to act honorably, to not to hike up her skirt like some a randy son of a gun after only one thing.

He wanted more.

“Do you remember when I told you I’d make you pay?”

That part he had forgotten. What could he give her? What could she possibly want from him? His shoulders slumped. What she’d wanted from the start. Her farm. The acres he’d proposed they barter for her time.

“I remember.” He turned to face her. “I—”

The brilliance of her smile brought him to an abrupt halt. That and the fact she’d followed him and now stood a hand’s-breadth away. Smiling again. No, more like beaming. At him.

He cleared his throat. “I remember.” He winced. She had him repeating himself like an awestruck schoolboy.

The arch of her brows suggested she doubted if he did remember. She lifted her hand between them and tapped her index finger on his chest. “And you said?”

“You deserved whatever payment you wanted for the hell you were enduring.”

“Yes.” Her finger settled on his chest, finding a home. Even that light a touch sent shock waves through his body, making parts of him respond that were hard to ignore.

“And?” she prompted.

He wrenched his gaze from her hand. Her smile enthralled him again, along with her lips parted in expectation. He leaned toward her. Sweet Jesus, he wanted to—

“You said you’d
gladly
give me whatever I asked for,” she reminded him.

Finally, he understood what lay beneath her questions. “You’re wondering if I’ll keep my word.”

She nodded. She’d handed him his opportunity, his chance to show her he was an honorable man.

“I pay my debts.”

Her smile faded. “Debts.” She said the word with a profound graveness as her gaze cut to the window, the one that had held her attention until she’d turned to him. “In this we are once more the same. Time to clear all of our accounts, I think.” She withdrew her finger from his chest. “Will you do what I ask?”

He exhaled a long, reluctant breath before he could speak. “I will.”

He should’ve returned her farm long ago. He’d used the excuse of the absence of a house on the land to hold onto her. His gift stood waiting, and Sadie was well enough to go see it. She was right. It was time. But he still couldn’t move.

She did. She stepped around him, heading toward the other room. “Come with me.”

He found he could move after all. In fact, his feet were already in motion, following her.

She halted by the bed. Her gaze remained downcast, almost shyly so. But her tone, though quiet, held a note of command when she said, “Lie down.”

That was the last thing he’d expected her to say. “Lie down?” he echoed in utter confusion.

“You agreed you’d do as I asked.”

His bewilderment knew no bounds. He didn’t know what to say or think. So he did as she bid him. The simple act of lying on his bed while she stood nearby made his heart race with anticipation—and more doubts.

This couldn’t be happening. He must have misheard her request.

“Sadie, I’ll give you back your farm. I should’ve done so long ago. Let me fetch the deed. It’s in the desk in the other room.”

She dropped to her knees beside him. Her gaze swept the length of him, making his blood thud in his veins. “Twice now I’ve been laid out on this bed with fever and illness.”

She’d omitted the other time she’d been “laid out” on his bed, provoking a twitch in the rapidly swelling area below his belt buckle. He shifted restlessly, remembering her lying on the bed beneath him, wanting her there again.

A bloom of pink colored her cheeks. “You were always the one in control.”

The truth was he’d lost every speck of self-restraint when he’d finally bedded her. She was like the sweet crisp air on the open prairie. He couldn’t get enough of her.

“Have you ever known what that feels like?” she asked. “To be so completely under someone else’s power?”

He knew, but he could do little more than nod. Suddenly, he grasped another truth. Despite recovering from her illness, she didn’t feel strong. He made her feel weak with his need to shelter her from harm. He couldn’t stop trying to protect her, but he could do whatever else she asked.

“Tell me what you want.”

“I’d rather show you.” Her fingertips brushed his shirtfront, glided down his stomach to the waistband of his trousers.

Every muscle in his body snapped to attention as if he’d received the shock of his life, or the greatest gift. He lurched into a sitting position and captured her wrist. “You’re thinking about your book again.”

Beneath her sinfully soft skin, her wrist went rigid as she balled her hand into a fist. “And you’re refusing me
again
.”

“Yes. No.” His reply came out gruffer than he intended.

A flash of sorrow widened her eyes, then her lids shuttered, hiding her thoughts. None of them could be good.

“I’m not sure what I’m doing. I wanted to act—” He swallowed the word honorably. The only disgrace was him squashing her wish to spread her wings and fly. “You don’t have to do this.”

“No, I don’t.” Her gaze drifted to the doorway. “But just once, I want to do something entirely for me before I must face the inevitable.”

* * *

I want to live
before I die.
She wanted to soar with no restraints, no holding back. Then maybe she could do more than stare out a window looking for threats. Then she could cross Front Street one last time and tackle Gertie head-on.

As if he could read her thoughts Noah said, “If you’re asking me to let you return to the Star, I can’t. Nor can I let you leave Dodge alone. It’s too dangerous. I can’t let you go.” Despite his words, he released her wrist and slumped back onto the mattress. “I’ll gladly give you your farm though and as far as the rest…” His eyes glowed like molten gold. “I’m yours to command.”

Her heart pounded with a hundred different requests. Where to start? “Will you take off your clothes? All of them?”

He undressed quickly and lay down even faster. Mesmerized by his hard lean body and the powerful length of his arousal, she could only stare…until she recalled the picture of Fanny Hill holding that power in her hand.

With the stroke of one finger, she made his strength swell. His hands moved to clutch the mattress while hers wrapped around him.

His hips rose off the mattress. Startled, she loosened her hold. He slid through her grasp, on the way up and down. His deep rumble of appreciation encouraged her to repeat the action, many times.

“I adore watching you move.”

“Then you’d better stop.” His breathing grew ragged, as if he might shatter at any moment.

She’d felt that way when he’d been inside her. “What happens if I don’t?”

“I find release,” he said through gritted teeth. “Doubt if an earthquake could move me after that.”

Her best odds of escaping the jail would be then. She didn’t want to think about leaving him. She wanted to be even closer to him than she was now.

“Can you keep a firm hold on the mattress for a moment?”

Without waiting for his answer, she released him. His growl of disappointment shook her when she laid her palms flat on his chest, and set one knee on the mattress beside his hips. She swung her other leg over to straddle him.

He went dead still. His heat nestled against her naked core.

“Merciful heaven. When did you remove your under-clothes?” His words rumbled, like the purr of a big cat.

“After I left the window.”

“You came in here.”

“I hoped you’d agree to my request.”

“I’m eager for your next command.” He held himself still, waiting.

A burning need to be one with him swept over her. The wish to control him in any way went up in smoke. “Do whatever you want and I’ll do the same.”

He moved inside her with incredible patience, giving her every opportunity to tell him to stop. When she quickened the pace, he followed readily, until they both cried out. She soared with him over the highest precipice. When they came down, he cradled her in the haven of his arms.

She’d won the jackpot, a love more precious than her own life.

The only way she could continue winning was to return to the Star and kill Gertie, and Cora too. Then she’d have repaid Edward and guaranteed Noah’s safety. She’d also have ensured her departure from Dodge…courtesy of the hangman’s noose.

But first she had to leave Noah’s embrace.

* * *

On top of him
, Sadie tensed then relaxed again, still struggling to trust him. She wore her dress, while his clothing lay strewn about the floor. But he was far from naked. He didn’t move. He wanted to hold onto her forever.

Underneath him, the bed began to vibrate. Tiny tremors that swelled until the trunks, the floor, the entire room rattled around them. His world in upheaval. Familiarly so.