A thaw had melted most of the snow, so I was able to ride my Honda out to the abandoned building where I was to meet Baset’s man. I circled the block twice before deciding it seemed safe enough, though I wouldn’t know until I actually went inside.
I parked out front, but before I could make it to the door, Henri stepped out from the alleyway.
He didn’t say anything. He simply walked over to me, handed me an envelope, and turned and walked away. There was enough cash there to keep me funded for quite a long time.
I breathed easier as I mounted my Honda and put distance between me and the vampire. There was no name with the money and quite frankly, I was surprised he had even paid me. I was assuming The Left Hand had stolen the last payment and that Baset wouldn’t be willing to pay me again.
Still, the money sat heavy in my coat. It would help make sure there was food in the house and that Mikael would get paid for his information, yet I really didn’t want it. It was blood money. There was no way around it. I’d killed someone for the cash, and even though the vamp deserved it, I still didn’t like it.
On the way home, I drove past the empty landscape where the road to Delai had once been. I idled there and watched the horizon, hoping to catch some glimpse of a fire, of a light that would let me know that someone was there.
After a while I gave up. I had a feeling that no matter how many times I drove by, the road would never be there again. Delai was lost to me, and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it.
The rest of the ride home was filled with bitterness. I had half a mind to turn around and storm Adrian’s mansion again, just to see what would happen. Just because the Oath prevented me from hurting the big wolf himself, it didn’t stop me from hurting his underlings.
But then I would put my friends at risk. I wasn’t sure how quickly Adrian would act on his promise to retaliate, though I was pretty sure the bastard would eventually get around to it. He had me right where he wanted me.
At least for now. I would find a way out from under his thumb eventually. The same went for Countess Baset. It would just take time.
While there was little I could do about Baset, Adrian, Levi, or even Count Mephisto, if he decided to inject himself into my life as well, there was one thing I’d been putting off ever since I’d returned.
Before heading home, I made a stop at a flower shop that stayed open for those of us who walked the night. I carried my purchase in through the garage and found Ethan and Jeremy sitting in the living room talking.
They glanced up at me as I entered and a flood of warmth passed over me. While I might not have wanted Jeremy to stay at first, I’d come to like the kid. He could have the spare bedroom for as long as he wanted it. I kind of hoped he decided to stay permanently. Ethan could use the company.
I took a deep breath. Out of all the things I’d tried to do over the last few weeks, this was going to be the hardest.
“Where is he?” I asked.
It only took a moment for Ethan to understand what I was talking about. He grew somber as he stood.
I followed him out the back door. He paused just outside, looked worriedly at the wide-open world, before finally walking through the backyard. He glanced over his shoulder to make sure I was following and gave me a shaky smile.
He might be terrified of the outdoors, but in important matters, he always found a way to suppress his fear. It was a strength I envied.
Jeremy followed us out. He stayed a few feet back, head down, as if he knew what was going on. Hell, he might. Who knew how much he knew of what had happened all those months ago.
We reached the edge of the woods and went in only a few feet before Ethan stopped beneath a huge pine. A stone rested on the ground a few feet away. There were no words on it, no indication that it was anything more than a large stone. I wouldn’t even have noticed it if Ethan hadn’t pointed it out. It looked natural there, like it had always been in that very spot.
I didn’t need him to tell me that this was the place. I walked alone over to the stone and knelt to the frozen ground. My throat constricted and I almost got up, unable to do what I so desperately needed to do.
Instead, I laid in front of the stone the single red rose I’d purchased. The flower would wilt from the cold, but that was okay. Everything died eventually. It was perfect in its own way.
I pressed my hand against the stone. It was icy to the touch. The ground in front of it was still bare of grass. It hadn’t had time to grow before the cold had set in.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I promise to do better from now on.”
The wind rustled the trees above my head. It blew across my face, swept the tears away before they could freeze on my cheeks. The air breathed new life in me. It felt good on my skin. I didn’t care how cold it was. I was already as cold inside as I was ever going to get.
Fresh snow started to fall. The brief respite from winter had come and gone.
I bent and kissed the stone before standing. My coat billowed out behind me as a strong gust of wind passed through the trees.
Without another word, I turned and walked back to the house, leaving Thomas’s grave to be covered by the fresh falling snow.