Blood Haze (4 page)

Her
sex life with Drew was just fine. A small voice from somewhere deep and far off
within, whispered to her,
was
‘
just fine’ how sex was supposed to be described
?

Swiping
a hand against her running nose, she sighed when she saw the dark smear on her
hand in the moonlight. Grabbing another tissue, she pressed it against her nose
once again. At this rate, she’d bleed to death. What was happening to her?
She’d never had this many glimpings in a row. It felt as if things were
building to a head or something.

The
last dream she had was different from the previous ones– different and
terrifying. The interior of the car was dark with the exception of the
dashboard dials. Music was blaring loudly from the car’s speakers. She looked
down and saw the familiar slide of a hand moving up a leg. The darkness once
again kept their identity secret. The man leaned into the unknown woman and
pressed his lips against the base of her throat. She moaned and wrapped her
bare legs around his waist.

Arabella
strained to see them, but her efforts were in vain. It was then she became
aware of the difference in the dream… this time the car was moving. She could
see cars as they flashed by quickly. She heard a loud horn blare… right before
the car began to flip over and over again. She woke up with a jerk, an unknown
fear assailing her.

 
The sun had barely risen when Arabella rose
groggily from her bed and stepped under the hot spray of the shower. She had a
catering job at noon and still needed to finish the prep work. Her mother had
started the catering business when she’d left the stage. She and her mother had
run it until her mother’s untimely death. Now, she worked it by herself. A Fair
Lady Catering Service would never be a multimillion dollar company, but she was
busy enough.

She
padded through the house she’d lived in the bulk of her life, heading to the
kitchen in search of a much needed cup of coffee. The familiarity of every
piece of furniture and knick knack gave her comfort. As she sat at the kitchen
table and blew across her coffee’s surface, unease settled low in her belly.
She wished Drew was there to comfort her, as he’d been doing for more than half
her life.

Needing
his calming assurance and feeling the need to cling to him with both hands, she
grabbed her cellphone from the charger and punched in his number. It rang five
times before switching to voicemail. She sighed heavily. He’d said he had to
work this morning, then was heading up to visit his mother. Next, she punched
in Ian’s number.

“This
better be damned important,” her brother’s voice growled through the line.

“Hey,
little brother. Rough night?” she asked, happy that he’d answered.

“No,
just a late one. Why are you up so early on a Saturday? Didn’t you work last
night?” he asked.

“I
did, but I have the Hamptons’ job today. I just wanted to check on you before I
began. You doin’ okay?”

She
heard him groan as he sat up and yawned loudly into the phone. “Yep, as I said,
I just stayed out too late last night.”

“I
thought you were going out with Drew to meet with the Rowing Team tonight?” she
said disapprovingly.

“I
am,
Mother
. I’m young. Unlike you, I
can stay out two nights in a row and not fall over in a dead heap.”

“I’m
sorry. I just worry about you,” she said softly.

“I
know, but I’m fine - fine, but in desperate need of coffee.”

“Promise
me, you’ll be extra careful tonight,” she pleaded mildly.

“I’ll
be with Drew. How much trouble could I possibly get into? He’s almost as dull
as you are,” he said with a mocking laugh.

“I
love you, too, Ian,” she said, returning his laugh.

“Go
to work and let me get back to sleep,” he groused.

“Okay.
How about brunch tomorrow? I’ll make the chicken and waffles you like,” she
said enticingly.

“You
certainly know the way to a man’s heart. Okay, Sunday brunch… count me in. Make
sure there’s lots of Bloody Mary mix. I have a feeling I’ll be needing it.”

She
laughed. “I will. Bye, Ian. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Later,”
he replied, an instant before the phone clicked off.

She
sat for a long moment holding the phone in her hand, her eyes staring
unseeingly out the window. The unease she’d felt since her last dream, settled
low in her stomach, and she was filled with a terrible foreboding.

She
put the phone on the table and wrapped both hands around her coffee mug and
took another fortifying sip. Lynx Rogan skipped across her mind, and she felt
her pulse quicken. She wondered what he was doing right that instant. Had he
found someone to while away his time with the night before? Maybe he already
had someone at home.

Lynx
Rogan was an exceptionally handsome man, who also was charismatic, charming,
and had that sexy-as-hell accent. His dark, roguish, bad-boy looks tempted a
woman to try and save him from his wicked ways… or at least participate in
them. She felt a tingle of sensual longing trail its way through her body as
she remembered his cool knuckles brushing her cheek. She remembered how he
smelled and the silky resonance of his voice as he’d spoken her name with such
reverence.
Arabella
.

She
shook her head to rid it of thoughts of Lynx Rogan. Guilt flooded her for once
again having thoughts of someone else other than Drew. She leaned forward and
picked up a picture placed at the back of the breakfast bar. She rubbed a thumb
over Drew’s familiar features. They were sitting together on a park bench,
their faces close together. His arm was extended beyond the picture, holding
the camera, as he took the ‘selfy’ picture.

She
studied his face carefully. While he was smiling for the camera, it wasn’t the
same happy, carefree expression he’d worn the night before when he’d been with
Maggie. It wasn’t that she didn’t think he loved her; she knew without doubt,
he did. But was it the love of a lover; or the love shared between lifelong
friends?

What
was happening within her to raise these questions now? If she were honest, she
knew she’d been having them for a long time; she’d just refused to admit to
them. She needed Drew, depended on him for her sanity and stability. But just
as she’d asked him the night before, was that really fair to him? Exhaling
slowly, she rose from her chair and began making preparation for her upcoming
job.

Arabella
worked quickly and efficiently throughout the day; finishing satisfactorily
with only a few minor mishaps. Mishaps were the nature of the beast for a
catering business. Opinions of how a job went were like elbows, her mother used
to say… everybody has one. Some people were happy with everything you did, and
some complained about absolutely every single thing. But now she was done. The
Hamptons had paid her fee plus a nice bonus.

She
drove her little, white, catering-van into the garage and began unpacking. She
thought about the veal medallions she’d prepared earlier for the Hamptons’
party. They were Drew’s favorite, along with the asparagus with hollandaise
sauce. An idea began to form in her mind and she smiled. While she may have
doubts about some aspects of their relationship, she knew Drew Larkin, and he
loved her cooking.

After
making what preparations she needed to do, she dashed off for a quick shower.
She kept a close eye on the clock as she rushed to get ready for her set at the
Night Owl. She would be cutting it close, but she thought she’d have just
enough time if she wasn’t required to linger after she finished singing. After
blow-drying her hair, she slipped on a sexy, red camisole – Drew’s personal
favorite. She rummaged through her closet and finally settled on a sleeveless
black dress with tulip-shaped panels which made up the short shirt. She paired
the dress with silky, black hose, and black stilettos.

After
pinning her hair back, she applied her makeup, and after a quick turn in front
of the mirror, she grabbed her purse and moved swiftly to her car. She was on
her way to the club, when she realized she’d missed a call from Drew. Connecting
to her voicemail, her heart began to pound at his hesitant words.
Ara… we need to talk
. Those five words,
said so ominously, hit her in the gut. She tried to reach him, but the call
when straight to his voicemail.

She
heaved a sigh of relief as she stepped through the old, oak doors of the Night
Owl Nightclub, with just minutes to spare. The sooner she got through the set,
the sooner she could try to catch up with Drew. His call had unnerved her. He’d
been her rock and stabilizer for so long, she didn’t know what she’d do if… she
didn’t even want to consider not having him in her life.

She
saw Karmyl sitting at the bar, leaning forward, talking to Tobias. Karmyl was
dressed in a stunning red dress which went surprisingly well with her red hair.
She was an amazingly beautiful woman. Now that she’d met him, Arabella could
see the startling similarity between Karmyl and her brother.

“About
time you got here,” Karmyl said with a raised eyebrow.

“What?
I’m right on time,” Arabella replied distractedly.

Glancing
at her watch, Karmyl said, “Well, it’s about
that
time. Tom’s already on the stage. Come see me before you go,
okay?”

“Okay.”
Arabella groaned to herself,
Not tonight
.
She knew Karmyl would have been told about what had happened in the club the
night before.

She
went into her small dressing room and stowed away her purse and wrap before
heading back out. She’d just turned when her cellphone’s familiar ringtone
played. Knowing she’d be late, she dove for it anyway and dug it quickly out of
her purse.
Drew
!

“Drew,
hey, it’s me,” she said quickly, afraid he’d hang up.

Silence
filled the other end.

“Drew?”

“Ara…
I… you… I don’t know… about what you asked me last night. I… I think we need a
break,” he said quietly.

Her
chest burned. “Drew,” she whispered, more scared than she’d ever remembered
being… more alone than she ever remembered being.

“I’m
sorry. I should have said something last night when you asked me. But I… I
didn’t want to hurt you… I still don’t.”

Her
throat felt like a boulder had been lodged there. “Is it because of last night?
About the glimpsing?”

He
sighed heavily. “Its… it’s a lot of things, Ara. We’ve just been together so
long. I don’t know… its stifling sometimes. Half the time, I already feel like
a husband to you and a father to Ian. I… just… need a break.”

When
she didn’t answer… couldn’t answer, he continued, “Ara, I… I’m tired of scenes
like we had last night. I thought I could handle it, but I just can’t. It was
one thing when we were kids, but now, well now, I need to build a life for
myself. Things like last night… well, they could impact my future.”

I thought it was our
future
, she thought. Swallowing hard, she nodded, even though
she knew he couldn’t see her. Finally, needing to get off the phone before she
embarrassed herself by begging him to stay, she cleared her throat, and said,
“I understand.” Clearing her throat once more, she said in a rush, “Listen, I’m
late for the stage. We’ll… um… we’ll talk soon, okay?”

“Ara…”
he began.

“I’ve
got to go. Bye,” she said quickly and hung up as fast as she could. A cold
stone settled in her chest. When all the wicked twists of her life had
transpired, she’d always had Drew. Now what did she do? Inhaling deeply, she
closed her eyes and struggled to pull herself together. She had a job to do.
She had people who depended on her. She could do this. She’d gotten through
worse... but not without Drew. Woodenly, she walked from the dressing room and
slowly made her way to the stage. She glanced covertly to the horse-shaped
benches in the back, but there was no dark-haired, bad-boy in any of them. She
was thankful she didn’t have to contend with Lynx Rogan on top of what’d just
happened with Drew.

She
gave a small nod of her head to Tom and closed her mind to everything but the
sounds of the sax as music filled the small club. She’d gotten halfway through
her set when
he
walked in. Arabella
stumbled over her words. She really didn’t need this. Hopefully she’d be able
to avoid him until she was stronger. She knew she was being melodramatic, but
he… he drained her and stirred her up in a way she didn’t understand… didn’t
want to understand, and she really, really couldn’t deal with that right now.
She could only deal with one crisis at a time.

 
He didn’t sit where he’d been the night
before. Tonight, he sat with his back leaned against the bar. He had one hand
on the bar, and one hand rested lightly against his thigh. He was dressed
casually in blue jeans and a long-sleeved black shirt. His luxurious black hair
swept against the top of his shoulders when he shifted his head.

He
made her feel self-conscious and she had a hard time concentrating on the music
and kept stumbling over words she’d sung hundreds of times. She tried to pull
her mind away from him, but it seemed no matter how she tried, she just
couldn’t keep her eyes from finding him… over and over. The entire second half
of her set was excruciating. She was glad when she finally completed it. Shame
and recriminations filled her. Her boyfriend of more than ten years had just
broken up with her, and she couldn’t keep her eyes off another man. She really
was pathetic.