Blushing at Both Ends (28 page)
Read Blushing at Both Ends Online
Authors: Philip Kemp
âDear Victor,' cried Lucy, âyou say the sweetest things!' Leaning forwards, she gave me a long kiss, while grasping the shaft of my prick and squeezing it gently. âOh, how hard he is! If this is what comes of your spanking me, dear cousin, you may spank me just as often as you like! Now quickly, Victor, quickly,' she breathed, bending to kiss the head of my engorged manhood, âI long to have you inside me!'
I needed no further urging. As her bottom was too sore for her to lie under me she turned and, resting her upper torso on the seat, presented her roseate rump that I might take her
a tergo
. I was delighted to do so, and thrust joyfully into her tight wet little cunny. As I entered her fully, it enhanced my ardour to feel the blazing mounds of her tender bottom against my belly. So aroused were we both by this stage that, very quickly, we came together in an ecstatic climax. I only hope that the first-class compartments of the Great North-Western Railway were well sound-proofed, or our fellow travellers on either side may have been a trifle alarmed.
Afterwards, we reclined together on the seat, and I held the sweet girl in my arms, kissing her firm young breasts and gently caressing the still-glowing curves of her well-spanked bottom. âWho would have thought,' I mused, âthat the trick you played on Mrs Huskinson would lead to so delightful a consequence?'
âOh, as to that,' she replied with a mischievous smile, âthat wasn't entirely true.'
âWhat? But Gwyneth said . . .'
Lucy giggled. âOh, yes, it's true that Matron wasn't well this morning. But that was due to her overindulgence in porter the night before. What I told you about the laxative was just wishful thinking.'
I gazed at her in bewilderment. âBut why on earth did you concoct such a tale?'
âWhy? Dear Victor, can't you guess? To induce you to spank me, of course. From the moment I first saw you, on the platform at Shrewsbury, I was resolved to have you. Few men, I've found, can resist spanking my bottom if given the least excuse; and from spanking to fucking I knew would be an easy transition.'
To say I was flabbergasted would fall far short of the truth. âWhy,' I gasped, âyou artful little minx! Lucy, I have a good mind to put you back across my knee here and now. Clearly, I failed to spank you nearly hard enough. Think yourself very lucky, my girl, that I have no hairbrush with me.'
âOh, but I have a hairbrush in my case,' Lucy announced with her most demure smile. âShall I retrieve it for you, dear cousin?'
17
Wilde Times â The Missing
Spanking Scene from
The
Importance of Being Earnest
OSCAR WILDE IS
usually pegged as gay. But his status as gay icon and martyr obscures the fact that for a long time he was happily, and very physically, married. And during his first American tour, it's said, he took full and vigorous advantage of the facilities when invited to a cathouse in Colorado. So, bisexual at the least. But was he into spanking? A recent discovery by the tireless researchers of the Camden Institute for Disciplinary Studies suggests that maybe he was
.
The find consists of several sheets of pale-mauve vellum writing paper that still, after all these years, retain a faint fleeting odour of patchouli oil. On them, in emerald-green ink, is what appears to be an early version of the opening of Act III of Wilde's most famous play
, The Importance of Being Earnest.
Leading Wilde scholars have pronounced the handwriting to be indubitably Oscar's
.
Preceding events: Act II of the play is set in the garden of Mr Jack Worthing's country house, where Cecily Cardew, Jack's young ward, and Gwendolen Fairfax, daughter of the formidable Lady Bracknell, meet for the first time. Each girl believes herself engaged to a certain Ernest Worthing. It emerges that Gwendolen's fiancé is,
in
fact, Jack, while Cecily's fiancé is really Jack's friend (and Gwendolen's cousin) Algernon Moncrieff. Both men, for reasons far too complicated to go into, have been calling themselves Ernest Worthing. Shocked at this revelation, the two girls flounce scornfully off into the house, leaving Jack and Algernon to discuss the situation as Act II ends
.
ACT THREE
SCENE I:
Drawing room at the Manor House, Woolton. GWENDOLEN and CECILY are at the window, looking out into the garden
.
GWENDOLEN: The fact that they did not follow us at once into the house, as anyone else would have done, seems to me to show that they have some sense of shame left.
CECILY: They have been eating muffins. That looks like repentance.
GWENDOLEN: And tea-cake. That looks like inconsolable grief. Oh! They're looking at us. What effrontery!
CECILY: I do believe they're talking about us. That least shows a proper sense of priorities.
GWENDOLEN: They seem to have reached a decision.
CECILY: They're approaching. They appear very resolute.
GWENDOLEN: When one man is resolute, that may indicate strength of character. When two men are united in resolve, their purpose is usually deplorable. Let us preserve a dignified silence.
CECILY: Certainly. It's the only thing to do.
Enter JACK and ALGERNON. JACK looks serious; ALGERNON is grinning
.
JACK: We are agreed. Between you, you have utterly exposed our respective subterfuges. We find this most inconsiderate of you.
GWENDOLEN and CECILY (
together
): Oh!
ALGERNON: Deception is the essence of civilised society. If we all went around demolishing one another's deceptions, what would become of polite conversation?
JACK: Or of sound business practice?
ALGERNON: Or of political principles?
JACK: Or of the Church of England? Besides, behaviour such as yours sets a most pernicious example to your elders.
ALGERNON: Young ladies have no business setting bad examples. There will be plenty of time for that once you are married.
CECILY (
indignantly
): But what of the bad example you have set us, in misleading us as to your names and characters?
JACK: Young gentlemen are supposed to mislead young ladies. That is what courtship is all about. There is no place in it for brutal honesty.
ALGERNON: There will be plenty of time for that once
we
are married.
JACK: Besides, you have done us an even more unforgivable injury.
GWENDOLEN (
haughtily
): And what was that, pray?
ALGERNON: By retiring so abruptly from the tea-table, you left us with no alternative but to finish all the muffins.
JACK: And the tea-cake.
ALGERNON: Our constitutions may never recover. We shall probably live out wretchedly blighted lives as martyrs to indigestion. And martyrs are notoriously unwelcome in good society. They expect to be persecuted, and sulk intolerably if they are not.
JACK: In short, we feel that your conduct has been quite unforgivable.
GWENDOLEN: Then why have you followed us indoors?
ALGERNON: In order to forgive you.
CECILY: Oh, that shows generosity of spirit. I admire that in a man.
GWENDOLEN: And a total absence of logic. I admire that even more.
ALGERNON: However, we feel that we cannot forgive you â
GWENDOLEN: Oh!
CECILY: How vexing!
ALGERNON: Until we have spanked you for behaving so badly.
GWENDOLEN and CECILY (
horrified
): Spanked us!
JACK: Decidedly. Do I take it that you object?
GWENDOLEN: Of course I object. I have never been spanked â or, at least, not recently. I should find it most humiliating.
CECILY: I have never been spanked at all. I should find it most exciting â I mean, outrageous.
ALGERNON: Your objections are cogent, and deserve to be considered at length. Accordingly, we shall postpone consideration of them until you've been spanked. Action is always improved by a little thought after the event.
ALGERNON advances on CECILY, who backs away, her eyes shining with excitement. JACK advances purposefully on GWENDOLEN
.
GWENDOLEN: Mr Worthing! Are you offering violence to my person?
JACK: Offering? Certainly not. You might decline, and think how humiliating that would be. I intend to bestow it, which bespeaks generosity on my part, and furthermore relieves you of the tiresome burden of choice. You may express your gratitude in due course.
He takes her by the wrist and sits down on an upright chair, drawing her down over his lap
.
GWENDOLEN: Oh! How dare you! Let me go at once! This is shameful!
JACK: Surely not. Punishment is recommended by the best authorities as a means of making people better, and indeed I feel better already. In a few minutes' time I'm sure I shall feel positively seraphic. (
He begins to turn up her skirts
.)
ALGERNON has captured CECILY, who puts up an unconvincing show of resistance. He leads her over to an upholstered pouffe, sits down upon it and puts her across his knee
.
CECILY: No, Algy! Don't! Do you take me for a child?
ALGERNON: Oh, by no means, darling. Spanking is far too good to be wasted on children. (
He flips up her skirt and slip, revealing a neat but sweetly rounded bottom clad in white linen drawers. He strokes it delightedly
.) Dear Cecily, I always said that your person was absolute perfection. Here is further proof of my discernment. You are quite perfectly, adorably spankable.
CECILY: Darling, you say the sweetest things! But then why has Uncle Jack never spanked me?
ALGERNON: Quite clearly, the deficiency of his taste regarding neckties extends also to the spankability of girls. (
He starts to lower her drawers
.)
GWENDOLEN (
attempting a withering glare, which is not easy from a prone position
): Algy, that is most offensive! Jack is about to spank
me
. And no one has ever accused me of not being spankable.
JACK (
caressing the voluptuous curves of her silk-clad bottom
): Indeed you are, my darling â deliciously spankable. I am about to prove it to my complete satisfaction â and yours, I hope. Algy, you wretch, apologise to your cousin at once!
ALGERNON: Later, perhaps. At present I should find the unaccustomed effort quite distracting. And to give anything less than my full attention to Cecily's first spanking would be inexcusable. She would have cause to doubt my utter devotion to her.
ALGERNON starts to spank CECILY soundly on her bare bottom. She squeals and kicks her legs
.
CECILY: Aah! Ohh! It stings so! Algy, do all spankings hurt so much? Ow-oww!
ALGERNON: Only when they're done properly, my darling.
CECILY: Oww! Oooh! And is it proper for you to spank me on my â aa-aah! â bare bottom?
ALGERNON: It's a matter of aesthetic appreciation, dear child. Would a connoisseur hang a veil before his most cherished painting?
JACK: Yes â because the charms of mystery are inexhaustible, while those of disclosure are finite. Besides, fine sheer silk, if it's tightly stretched, can
feel
(
he administers a sharp spank to GWEN-DOLEN's bottom
) quite exquisite!
GWENDOLEN (
squirming wildly
): Aaah-oww! Ernest â I mean, Jack â I am already convinced of your ardour! (
JACK applies several more ringing spanks
.) Ohh! Oww! There is no need â aa-haah! â to give me such vivid proof!
JACK (
continuing to spank her vigorously
): But, as yet, dearest one, so much of the proof has been bestowed in the form of kisses. The other end of your person, though equally lovely, has remained neglected. I merely aim to redress the balance.
The double spanking proceeds unabated for some time
.
CECILY: Oww! Ohh! Aah! Oh, darling Algernon, please stop a moment! Oww! I want to ask you something, and it's impossible to think â oww! â while one's having one's bottom smacked.
ALGERNON (
pausing
): What is it, my angel?
CECILY: Will you still be so cruel as to spank me when we are married?
ALGERNON: Of course, darling.
CECILY: Then you may continue.
ALGERNON: With pleasure, sweet girl. (
He does so
.)
GWENDOLEN: Aa-haah! Oww! Dear Jack, please stop â I also have a question. (
JACK pauses, caressing her bottom
.) Should the obstacles to our marriage prove insuperable, will you ever spank another girl?
JACK: Only out of a sense of duty, darling.
GWENDOLEN: Then you too may continue. (
He does so
.)
Enter MERRIMAN, the butler. He betrays not the least surprise at the situation, but coughs loudly
.
MERRIMAN: Ahem! Ahem! Lady Bracknell!
Enter LADY BRACKNELL. She stops short in the doorway, astounded by the sight that meets her eyes. Exit MERRIMAN
.
ALGERNON: Good heavens! Aunt Augusta!
JACK: Lady Bracknell! I hope you will forgive us if we do not rise. As you see, Algernon and I are somewhat encumbered.
LADY BRACKNELL: So I perceive. Is this chastisement intended to improve the young ladies' conduct, or is it purely for recreational purposes?
JACK: Both, I hope, Lady Bracknell.
LADY BRACKNELL: I am sorry to hear it. Pleasure and moral instruction should never mix. The results are invariably disastrous, especially in France. (
She raises her lorgnette
.) That bottom looks strangely familiar. Gwendolen! Is that you?
GWENDOLEN: Yes, Mamma.
LADY BRACKNELL: Why is Mr Worthing spanking you? Yesterday I found him on his knees before you, and today I find you over his knees before him. I shudder to think what yet more indecorous posture may be in prospect for tomorrow.
JACK: Miss Fairfax came here to see me, Lady Bracknell, against your express prohibition. I was shocked by such shameless disobedience. Knowing that Lord Bracknell was not in the best of health, I thought it no more than my duty to stand
in loco parentis
and administer a suitably paternal correction.
LADY BRACKNELL: I see. What your explanation lacks in credibility, Mr Worthing, it makes up for in ingenuity. (
She advances into the room
.)
Algernon
, I fail to recognise this young lady â from either end. Who, may I ask, is she?
ALGERNON: This is Miss Cecily Cardew, Aunt Augusta, Mr Worthing's ward. We met this afternoon and have become very fond of each other.
LADY BRACKNELL: So it would appear. Why are you spanking her?
ALGERNON: For the fun of it, Aunt Augusta.
LADY BRACKNELL: Good. I greatly prefer your answer to Mr Worthing's. It is entirely selfish, and thus has the ring of truth. (
She sits down in a chair affording a good view of both chastisements
.) Very well, you may both proceed.
JACK: Do I gather that you approve of our spanking these young ladies, Lady Bracknell?
LADY BRACKNELL: Certainly I approve. Girls should be spanked regularly. It discourages them from too much sitting, which may lead to reading and other undesirable pursuits. Far better to make a girl's bottom smart, than her head. It also ensures care over the more intimate items of apparel. A girl who knows she may be spanked at any moment will be sure to choose her most becoming undergarments.
GWENDOLEN: But, Mamma, won't you rescue me?
LADY BRACKNELL: Rescue you, Gwendolen? Really, you have a very strange sense of priorities. Yesterday you were eager to marry Mr Worthing, an action which would have entailed lasting consequences to your social standing â to say nothing of my own. Today you want me to dissuade him from giving you a spanking, whose effects will last no longer than tomorrow. Or perhaps the day after, since he appears to be a vigorous and resolute
young
man. The request is scarcely consistent. Mr Worthing, pray proceed. You too, Algernon.
JACK: Thank you, Lady Bracknell.
ALGERNON: Thank you, Aunt Augusta.