Boarded by Love (40 page)

“Yeah, well, if you would have asked or cared more about the person you were fucking instead of just using them as a hole to get off in, then you would have known,” she says, her eyes cutting me left and right.

“I never wanted anything more than sex, and you knew that from the start. This is not my fault.”

“How is it not your fault?” she screeches.

“’Cause like I said, Rachael, I never made any promises to anyone. I never once promised anyone anything. Yes, I said if I started dating I’d call, but I never promised it. I went in telling you and anyone else I fucked that it was a one-time thing. Nothing more. You kept coming back for more, and I’ll admit that you were a great lay, that’s why I kept taking it, but I never once looked you in the eyes and promised that I would love you, or tell you to love me. So if this is anyone’s fault, it’s yours.”

When her eyes start to fill with tears, I look away. I hate it when a girl cries. “Maybe you’re right, but it doesn’t ease the pain, Jude.”

“I get that, and I’m sorry that you’re hurting. You are a sweet person when you’re not being a bitch, and you’ve been a good friend. I never meant to hurt you.”

She shakes her head, roughly wiping away a tear that falls. “I just don’t get how you can fuck everyone with no feelings, no cares in the world, but then one girl comes along, someone who isn’t even that big of a deal, and you change. It baffles me.”

“She may not be a big deal to you, but to me, she’s everything. I love her.”

“Whatever,” she says, dismissing me.

“It isn’t whatever, it’s for real, and I’d like it if you’d stop giving her a hard time and trying to fuck with our relationship. Respect that I love her and be a friend. Don’t be an asshole.”

Still not looking at me, she shakes her head. “You should be with me.”

This time I’m shaking my head. “No, Rachael, I’m meant to be with her, and as my friend, I hope that you remember that I love her and she is special to me, and you won’t cause any more problems.”

She doesn’t say anything and I almost walk away since I don’t know what else to say. But then she looks up at me, her lip wobbling, and she says, “I have to let you go completely, don’t I? Nothing will ever happen?”

Taking ahold of her hands, I squeeze them, willing her to listen to me. I don’t know any other way to tell this girl that nothing will ever happen. As much as it sucks to hurt her, I love Claire. She’s it.

“I can
promise
you that nothing will ever happen between us ever again. I love her. Let me go, Rachael.”

More tears fall and she wipes them away. “Fine, Jude.”

“Thank you.”

She doesn’t say anything else; instead she turns and leaves without even a glance back at me. While I know she’s still hurting, I like that this is fixed as much as it can be. She just needs time to get over me, and I hope that during that process, she won’t fuck with Claire and me. If she does, I’m pretty sure I’m gonna have to cut her completely out of my life, and I don’t want to do that. I enjoy her friendship; we’ve been friends since we were kids, but I will let that go for Claire.

“You’re acting like a fucking girl, dude,” Jayden calls from his bed, and I flip him the middle finger without looking at him as I pull clothes out of my closet.

“Shut up,” I say, reaching for a shirt, then putting it back. “Her uncle hates me and I want to dress nice to try to impress him a tad bit.”

“If he hates you, why does it matter?”

“’Cause I want him to like me, dumbass! I want her to marry me one day,” I say, glaring at him.

Jayden shakes his head and looks down at his books. “You’re weird.”

Turning, I say, “Why?”

“’Cause Jude, this is your first girlfriend, and you’re already thinking marriage?”

“I said one day, asshole. Open those ears.”

“Whatever. I see it in your eyes. If you could, you’d do it today.”

Maybe so, but there is no way I’m admitting that to this asshole. Reaching for a light blue collared shirt, I throw that on and look in the mirror to make sure it matches the charcoal pants I have on. Thankfully it does, but I look plain. Throwing on a black tie and then a black sweater, I push my sleeves up to my elbows and let out a breath. Moving my fingers through my hair, I wish I had gotten it cut. It’s a little long and falls in my eyes, giving me a troublemaker look. Which I guess is right, but still I don’t want Claire’s uncle thinking that. I probably should have shaved too, but Claire loves my beard and so do I.

I guess this will have to do.

Turning, I look at Jayden with my arms out. “How does this look?”

Looking up at me, bored, he rolls his eyes before holding his hand out. “Gorgeous, darling. Simply breathtaking.”

Throwing a pillow at him, I reach for my riding jacket and put it on as he laughs. I don’t know why he’s playing around when it obvious I’m nervous. I don’t ever get nervous, so I really don’t know what the hell my problem is. I got this. Phillip will love me before the night is over and everything will be fine. Instead, I am sitting here, freaking out, thinking that he’s going to make Claire break up with me. Even though that won’t happen since she’s a grown-ass woman and she loves me, she still values his opinion, and I really don’t want that to come between us. It will just be easier if he likes me, so fingers and toes crossed for that.

Reaching for the door, I go to leave but then Jayden says, “Don’t worry, dude. He’ll love you, and y’all will get married and have little Claires and Judes running around. Just don’t call me to babysit.”

A grin pulls at my lips as I shake my head. “I wouldn’t leave my kids with you, so don’t worry about that, but thanks.”

We share a smile and I leave feeling a little bit better.

When I arrive at Claire’s building, she’s standing out front, wrapped tightly in her jacket. When she spots me, she puts out a thumb and hikes up her skirt, making me grin under my helmet. Pulling up beside her, I turn the bike off and say, “Hey, sweetie, wanna go for a ride on my bike?”

She gives me a seductively naughty grin and asks, “Will it be nice and long?”

“Yes, very long and satisfying.”

“Mmm,” she murmurs in a suggestive way. “Maybe a little hard too?”

“You dirty girl, come on,” I say, not able to take it anymore. If we keep on, I know we won’t make it to dinner. Putting her helmet on, she gets on behind me, wrapping her arms around me before kissing my shoulder.

“I missed you.”

“I missed you more,” I answer and then turn the bike on. Pulling out, I follow the directions my GPS tells us from my Bluetooth. It’s a little bit of a long ride, but I don’t mind it. I worry about Claire though, she’s only wearing tights under her skirt, and I hope she isn’t too cold. When we pull up to a big stone house, I stop my bike by the curb and turn the bike off since Siri is telling me I’ve reached my destination.

“You all right back there?” I ask as I remove my helmet, then my body off the bike.

She pulls hers off and shrugs her shoulders. “My legs are frozen. I forgot to put my sweats on when I was teasing you.”

“Sorry about that,” I say as she comes off the bike, handing me her helmet as she fixes her hair.

“It’s my fault. Come on, we’re late.”

“Hold on,” I say, reaching into my saddlebag for the flowers I got. “For Reese.”

“That’s so sweet. She’ll love them. Gerbera daisies are her favorite,” she says, her face beaming as we head to the house. I don’t know what Gerbera daisies are, but I am glad that she will like the flowers. Reaching the door, Claire puts her hand on the handle and says, “I hope you still love me after this circus.”

I laugh as I nod. “I will.”

Letting out a long breath, she throws open the door and the first thing I see is a very big Phillip Anderson. He’s huge on the ice but in person he’s bigger, and with one look at him, I know I need to hit the gym some more or I’m going to get killed in the NHL. His blazing blue gaze locks on me and his brows meet as he glares.

“Hey, Jude,” Reese says, and I feel horrible that I didn’t see her standing beside Phillip. He takes up the whole room, though.

“Hey, Reese, these are for you,” I say, handing her the flowers. “Thank you for having me.”

“Oh, thank you, these are gorgeous,” she says happily and I smile.

“Phillip–” Claire starts to say, but he interrupts her.

“What the hell are you wearing?”

She looks down at her jacket and then back up at him “My riding jacket.”

His eyes cut back to me and he says, “So you ride a motorcycle?”

I smile. “I do, a sweet Star Bolt. Wanna go check it out?” I say, my voice cracking a bit.

Somehow he glares more and says, “No.” He then looks at Claire. “I don’t like him. At all.”

With that, he turns, and Reese says, “He doesn’t mean that.”

Claire throws her hands up and chases after him as she yells, “But you haven’t even given him a chance!”

Well, this is going to be fun.

P
hillip is being positively impossible!

“Phillip! I’m talking to you! Hello?!” I yell as I chase him through the halls of the home in which I spent my teenage years. I loved this house when it was just Phillip and me even though it was more a bachelor pad than a home, but I didn’t care. I mean, I lived in a car for over a year; his house was beautiful to me, but once Reese moved in, it was like a home makeover show. She went to work, hiring people to make Phillip’s house a home for our little family, and nothing has changed since I left.

As we make our way through the gourmet kitchen that Reese said we needed, I know he’s heading to his man cave where he will sit and wallow in the news that I am dating. He’s being so childish! He knows I date, he knows I have sex, I’m nineteen damn years old!

“Phillip, Phillip!” I yell just as he reaches the door. I rush to him, standing in his way, and he glares down at me.

“Move.”

“No! We’re talking about this! You didn’t even give him a chance! He is great! Superawesome!” I plead, but Phillip doesn’t look like he gives a shit at all.

“I don’t care.”

Just as I thought.

“Please,” I say as he tries to reach for the door handle.

“No,” he says firmly, getting his hand on the handle even though I’m pushing my hip into it.

“Phillip! That was just rude!” Reese yells, and he looks back at her.

“Stay out of this,” he says just as I trap his hand between my hip and the wall, causing him to yell out.

“Damn it, Claire! That hurt!”

“Oh, hush and stop being a big baby! I want you to meet my boyfriend!”

“I met him and didn’t like him!” he yells, his face red with anger.

“You didn’t even give him a chance!” Reese and I both yell, and he glares even more.

“I don’t want to get to know him. Now move! You and Reese can fuss over him, but I won’t!”

“That’s not fair!” I say, stomping my foot on the ground like a five-year-old. “Please, he really is special to me.”

“If she cares for him, you should give him a chance!” Reese yells and Phillip cuts her a look that could kill. I don’t think it scares her much because she gives him one right back.

“I don’t care. Move,” he says, trying to push me out of the way, but it’s obvious he’s not trying hard since I’m not moving much. He probably doesn’t want to hurt me, but I don’t think he realizes that he is by not giving Jude a chance.

“Please, Phillip,” I basically whisper. “Please give him a chance,” I say hoping that if I ask nicely enough and bat my eyes at him, it will work.

Looking at me, his eyes locking with mine, and I think I have him, but he says, “No.”

He then pushes me hard to the side, knocking me out of the way, and he throws the door open without even giving me a side glance. As he steps through, I yell, “But Daddy, I love him!”

He pauses mid-step and looks over his shoulder at me as Jude goes, “I knew you were my little mermaid.”

I hadn’t realized he was there, and while I would love to grin at him since I am acting like a very dramatic Ariel, my eyes stay locked with Phillip’s. Taking a deep breath in, I say, “I love him, Phillip, like, a lot. If you love me, then please give the guy I love a chance. He means a lot to me, and I think that you’d actually like him.”