BoldLust (4 page)

The way she acted definitely wasn’t very Christian. When
Betsy started bad-mouthing Opal, not ever having met her, that was when Kate
decided she couldn’t stomach being around the woman any more than she had to. It
was a small town, so Kate couldn’t completely avoid Betsy, but she did her
best.

“Well,” Betsy huffed. “I guess I’ll be going, then.” She
turned on her heel and walked to the door. “I hope Carter’s business doesn’t
suffer because of you.” Another direct threat from a supposedly holy woman.

Betsy let the door slam before Kate had a chance to reply,
not that anything she could say would make a difference anyway. Betsy was
pretty stuck in her ways and pretty sure she was right about everything.

The people who supported Carter’s business probably didn’t
give a damn about her reputation or anyone else’s either. But Kate hated the
thought that she could harm his income at all. He didn’t deserve that.

Damn, this was an unexpected turn of events. Kate was free,
and from her reaction to his touch, definitely interested in Carter. He liked
that fact just a little too much.

A rush of blood set in his cock from just touching her hand
innocently. Oh hell, who was he trying to kid. He didn’t have a single innocent
thought when it came to Kate. He wanted to tie her up, fuck her and make her
his forever. End of story.

He stood at the window, staring out over the endless expanse
of ocean. She was too pure, too innocent for a man with desires like his. She
was a lady, raised in a good home, and just because they seemed to share a
mutual attraction didn’t mean she could handle him.

Every time he looked at his rope supply and she was in the
room, his mind went down a single naughty track. Kate would be beautiful tied
up, taking his commands, taking his cock into her mouth, into her sweet wetness.
But could she handle it? There was only one way to find out. And making her
fully his once could mean losing her forever.

Was the risk worth the reward? Damn, he was in trouble.

Customer after customer and task after task consumed the
rest of Kate’s morning until it was time to take Carter his lunch. A nervous
knot formed in the pit of her stomach. Could she really do this? Could she put
her heart on the line and let Carter know the feelings she had for him? It didn’t
seem smart, especially after what Emma had told her.

Carter smiled that gorgeous smile that always took her
breath away as she walked into the room. He stood up to help her set lunch out
on the table, always chivalrous.

His hand brushed hers and she felt it again, that zap of
electricity she couldn’t deny anymore. Or at least didn’t want to.

Carter cleared his throat and looked at her with a serious
expression that made her a little nervous.

“I don’t want you to take this the wrong way, but I’m glad
that your fiancé left.” He looked into her eyes as he said the words, but they
didn’t give her any clue to his true emotions. He kept those well-hidden.

“Glad?” Maybe she wouldn’t have to be the one to approach
the subject of the attraction, but why in the world would he be glad her fiancé
left?

“Yes, glad. I’ve wanted to let you know how I feel about you
since the first time I saw you. I’m drawn to you, to your beauty, to your
charm. I knew there was someone else, so I’ve kept it to myself, but I don’t
want you to leave town without knowing how much I care about you.”

He said the words she wanted so badly to hear, felt the same
things she did, and a piece of her heart started to warm.

Carter stepped closer, grabbed both of Kate’s hands in his. “I’ve
been falling for you every minute I’ve been able to spend in your presence. The
day you came to work for me was one of the best days in my life, but it’s also
been torture knowing you were spoken for.”

His eyes pierced into her soul. She had been thinking the
same things, wanting the same things, but was unable to act on them out of
loyalty.

She’d been promised to another man, but now she didn’t owe
Sean anything. She could let herself feel the connection, the lust, without
guilt.

Carter pulled Kate against his solid, lean, muscled body. She
inhaled sharply. She wanted Carter, and to know he felt the same thing was
freeing. The physical proof that he wanted her was even better.

“There’s something strong pulling me to you. I’ve never felt
it before with any other woman. It’s almost inexplicable, but I’ve wanted to
kiss you, to touch you every damn day.” His breath was warm against her face. “May
I kiss you, Kate?”

Carter’s head bent to Kate’s, almost touching her lips, his
breath warm against her lips as he waited for her answer. Tempting her, making
it impossible to say no even if she wanted to.

“Yes.” The word came out breathy but there was no way she
could deny him, deny herself the one thing she really wanted, right now, in
this moment.

Carter didn’t hesitate but captured Kate’s mouth with his,
slow and gentle, but with a hunger that left no doubt that he wanted more.

Kate moved her hand behind Carter’s head, wound her fingers
through his hair and kissed him back. Her lips parted, letting his tongue taste
her, tasting back. She shouldn’t be doing this, shouldn’t be jumping into
something new so quickly, but it felt too good to stop.

“I’m in love with you, Kate. I want you.” His words were
growled, and a definite surprise. She tensed a little, but that didn’t stop the
need for him. In fact, knowing that he was in love with her, even though it was
sudden, made her want him more.

He had an amazing power over her body. Not that she was
surprised by it. The glimpses of what could be were the reason she’d had to
work so hard to avoid touching him for the past three weeks.

“Umm-hmm.” Kate moaned as his hands rubbed her back in slow,
methodical circles. She was losing focus, losing control fast, couldn’t even
come up with real words in response to his admission of love. She just needed
him to keep kissing her, needed him to touch her.

The proof that his body was just as affected as hers was
pressed hard against her belly. His cock was long and hard and wanting her. A
surge of wetness rushed to her opening, proving the need she had for him was
real.

Kate should resist this, shouldn’t be acting so wanton, but
her body refused to behave, instead she pressed herself tighter against him,
kissed him harder, let all the sensations of pleasure flow through her body.

“I’ve wanted you, needed to touch you for so long.” Carter
grabbed Kate’s skirt, bunching it up at her waist, and then ran his hand up the
warm skin of her inner thigh, slowly, just barely touching her. He stopped with
his thumb against her opening, pressing then releasing rhythmically.

She should say no, shouldn’t let a man with no promise of a
future together touch her the way Carter was touching her, but it felt so good
she didn’t want him to stop. Ever.

He circled her sensitive nub with his finger and heat surged
to her opening.

“Mmm-hmm,” was the only response she could come up with. His
touch made her head spin. All she could think about was how she wanted more of
him, all of him.

The man was good with his hands, but she had no idea what
that talent could do to her body. Kate had never been touched like this.

Carter’s mouth moved back to hers, urging her to kiss him
back with just as much passion. Just being near Carter made her body hum, but
when he touched her, the electricity surged all the way to her toes.

“I’ve never had a man make me feel so…so amazing.” She hadn’t
meant to say the words, but it was the truth. Kate sucked in a sharp breath as
his hand went back to work, touching and teasing her sensitive lower parts.

Carter’s fingers circled her nub again, and again, and the
room started to disappear. The only thing she could focus on was his eyes, deep
blue and full of passion as he stared intently at her. Her core tingled, skin
tingled, everything intensified, about to lose control.

Carter watched as he brought her right up to the edge and then
let her plunge over.

Kate’s own moans of pleasure echoed off the walls of the
little room as her body shuddered hard and wave after wave of pleasure surged
through her.

Carter held her tight against his strong body as she came,
his fingers moved to her wet opening, touching her gently, giving her jolts of
continuing pleasure.

It was amazing that he could make her feel this way with
just his fingers. What would it be like when he filled her with his cock, when
they became one?

Carter relaxed his grip on Kate but waited until her legs
were steady before he let go.

She didn’t want him to stop touching her. She wanted more of
the passion, wanted Carter to make love to her and then hold her in his arms
the rest of the day, but she’d already let him touch her more than a
respectable lady should. Kate wasn’t going to be any more forward, she wouldn’t
beg him to make love to her.

“I am completely head over heels in love with you, Kate.” His
eyes danced mischievously with the statement.

“You are?” How could he be? They weren’t engaged, he wasn’t
really even courting her, but she felt it too. Just wasn’t ready to admit it
yet.

“I’ve lived all over the world, met many women, but none
that have affected me the way you do. I’m smart enough to not let an
opportunity like this pass me by, Kate. I want you to be mine.”

The breath sucked from her chest and she didn’t know what to
say. She felt the same way about him, but this was all so unexpected.

“I don’t want anything from you now. You need to take some
time. Think about it. I don’t want you to be overwhelmed by the suddenness of
all this, but I don’t want you leaving Alaska, leaving me without knowing
exactly how serious I am about you.”

“Okay.” She didn’t know what to say or how to react. She’d
thought he was interested in her, but she had no idea of how serious his
feelings for her were. He had hidden them very well, just as she had worked so
hard to do.

“Good.” Carter kissed her on the forehead and grabbed her
hand in his. “I’ll see you tomorrow, then.” He walked her toward the door and
then down the stairs without any resistance from her, even though she suddenly
felt the need to fight it.

“Tomorrow?” She still had a half day left of work. Why was
he sending her away?

“Yes. I want you to take the rest of the day off. Take some
time to think, to feel. I want you, Kate, but I don’t want to rush you.”

“Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow,” she agreed. Not that she had
much of a choice. He was her boss, he determined when she came and went.

Kate walked out, disappointed to be leaving Carter. She
moved slowly up the boardwalk to her house. Her legs still felt a little like
jelly from his touch, from the pleasure Carter gave her.

Instead of going inside where Opal was possibly
entertaining, she stopped in front of the house and looked out over the water.
What was she going to do now?

Kate stared at the endless dark sea. She was a long way from
home, a long way from anything that resembled her previous life, but the ocean
always brought this sense of calm to her. She needed that now more than ever.

Carter was a good guy, but she couldn’t jump into another
relationship because she needed to feel loved after being rejected by Sean. It
wasn’t fair to either of them. Carter was right. She needed to think long and
hard before she made any decisions.

Carter paced back and forth across his living room floor,
nervous that he might have scared Kate away with his aggressive words, with his
aggressive actions. He hadn’t meant to ask the girl to be his, hadn’t planned
on touching her like he did. She had definitely enjoyed that part, but what
about tomorrow, when she had time to think about everything? Would she
understand his brash manner?

He had been lusting after Kate every damn day. His cock went
half hard every time she walked into the room, so he’d already suffered weeks
of hell, having her so close but just out of reach. Carter knew he had to do
something to keep her here, but he might have gone overboard.

It was too late to take any of it back. The only thing he
could do now was wait, and hope she felt just as strongly about him, hope that
he didn’t scare her away.

Carter tore a brown piece of cardboard from some of his
packaging, wrote the words
Help Wanted
in big black letters and then
shoved the sign up in his window.

Either way this whole thing went, he was going to have to
find someone new to work for him. If Kate agreed to be his, he didn’t want her
to have to work. She’d need to save all her energy for their nights together. He
didn’t want to think about the other option. It would hurt like hell to know
his impulsive actions had pushed Kate away. And this was just the start of the
things that might scare her from him.

* * * * *

There was an extra bounce in her step as Kate walked to work
in the morning. She was excited to tell Carter that she was going to stay the
summer and was willing to see where things would go with their relationship. It
was still too early to say yes to being his, but she wasn’t going to say no
either, and she was definitely willing to give it a chance. Kate was pretty
sure Carter was going to be happy to hear the news.

When she got to his house, she saw there was a Help Wanted
sign in the window. He sure wasn’t wasting any time replacing her. Had he
changed his mind already? Yesterday he wanted to keep her and today he just
wanted her to go? She couldn’t get tossed away by another man so quickly. It
wasn’t right. A lump formed in her throat. What was wrong with her that all the
men in her life would treat her this way?

Kate opened the door slowly and walked in to find Betsy
talking to Carter.

“When would you be able to start?” Carter’s voice boomed
through the room while he offered Better-Than-Thou Betsy a job.

Every muscle in her body tensed and she could feel her face
flush red. How could he? Carter was actually going to hire that woman. Kate
should speak up, let him know that she wanted to keep her job and that she didn’t
want Betsy taking her position, but she just watched silently as Carter gave
away her job.

“I can start today,” Betsy said with a smirk that Kate
wanted to slap right off her face.

“Great, Kate can train you,” Carter offered without her
consent. She sure as hell didn’t want to train Betsy, didn’t want to even be in
the same room as her for any significant amount of time.

“I’m sure it can’t be
that
difficult.” The way Betsy
said the words made Kate’s blood boil. Betsy came in often enough she probably
did know all about her job, but the woman didn’t need to be so condescending.

Kate forced a smile, for Carter’s benefit, tried to hide her
true feelings, worked at hiding the heartbreak. “Sure, I can show you what to
do.”

She shot Carter a glance, but he had already started to
focus on some papers in front of him and didn’t even notice her. “But I’d like
to talk to Carter for a minute.” She paused and then just to make sure Betsy
understood. “Alone.”

Maybe she
should
just jump on the first boat out of
here. Kate was putting her life, her decisions in the hands of a man she barely
knew because of some silly little feelings she had for him. She needed to be
sensible, needed to think for herself.

But she didn’t have enough money for the fare home yet. Kate
needed to work a little longer, and Carter had taken away her job.

He didn’t know her financial situation, so he couldn’t be doing
it to force her to stay. He wasn’t that kind of guy anyway. At least she didn’t
think he was. He did like to be in control of things, though.

Kate could ask her family for the money, but she wanted to
keep her job with Carter, needed to earn her own fare back so her family
wouldn’t find out where she was, wouldn’t ever know she had run off with a man.
She couldn’t ruin her reputation, couldn’t ruin their reputation. Hell, they
might not even pay her fare back if they found out what she had done.

“Sure. Come upstairs with me.” Carter marched up the stairs
and she followed right behind him. When they got into his workroom, he stopped,
shut the door and then turned to face her. “What would you like to talk about?”

“Why did you give my job away?” She said the words a little
more aggressively than she intended, but it got across her true sentiments, her
frustration with the situation.

“I didn’t expect to find someone so fast, but I need to get
help lined up. You are going to either leave me or be with me. Either way I
need someone to take over your job.” He towered over her and kept any emotion
he was feeling hidden—other than a little bit of confusion.

“Why would you need someone if I’ve decided to stay?” It
didn’t make sense he would get rid of her. He said he liked her work and that
hiring her had been the best decision he’d made since he came to Alaska. How
could that all have changed so quickly?

“Have you decided to stay?” he asked.

“Yes. At least for a while.” She ran her hands down the
front of her skirt, wiping off the perspiration on her palms that the whole
situation had caused.

“Great.” He pulled her in and kissed her lips lightly. “I’m
so glad to hear it.” Carter grinned and then squeezed her around the waist,
pressing her entire body against his.

Just the smell of him, his touch, caused a tingling between
her thighs. He had some power over her, but Kate couldn’t let her mind turn to
jelly. Not yet.

“What am I going to do now that you’ve given my job to
Betsy?” She needed that job back, needed him to go and tell Betsy that he had
made a mistake, needed to keep a little of her newly found independence. Needed
to make enough money that she could go home if she wanted to.

“You don’t need to work. I’ll take care of you.”

She didn’t want to be taken care of, she wanted to be
independent, wanted to be loved for the things she could contribute. He was
trying to control her just like everyone else in her life had. Just like her
parents and Sean had, and she couldn’t let it happen anymore.

“What do you expect me to do all day?” She had to make
money, had to take care of herself.

“Just sit there and look pretty for me.” Carter smiled, but
Kate’s stomach churned.

She couldn’t just sit around and do nothing. Kate wanted to
be valued, to do something helpful, not sit there bored. She’d spent her whole
life being taken care of, and that hadn’t worked out so well. It wasn’t going
to happen any longer.

Kate shook her head slowly. “I can’t do that.”

“Of course you can.”

“No.” She couldn’t let this happen again. She wouldn’t rely
on a man only to have her heart broken and be left stranded when he changed his
mind, decided that she wasn’t quite right for him anymore. “I can’t.”

Kate stormed out of the room, down the stairs and out of the
house before the tears began to fall. She didn’t want either Carter or Betsy to
see her cry.

Kate couldn’t fall into the same pattern of letting herself
be supported by a man, following meekly, doing whatever he wanted of her. She
wanted a job where she was actually needed, where she was important. She wanted
the independence that Opal and Emma had. They were both happy and didn’t have
to worry about being left alone.

Kate’s eyes were blurry as she made her way up the boardwalk,
almost home. She was doing the right thing, standing up for herself for the
first time in her life. She should be proud. But pride wasn’t even close what
she felt right now. She felt like the entire world was closing in on her, she
felt like she was going to throw up.

Opal was in the living room when she got home, sitting in
the soft chair, a book in her hands, but she closed the book and stood quickly
when Kate came in the door.

Did she look that pitiful? Probably. She
was
that
pitiful.

“What happened? Is everything okay?” Opal moved over so she
was standing next to Kate, the concern evident in her eyes, her face.

“No, everything is wrong.” Kate gave up on holding back the
tears, gave up on holding back the pain, and Opal pulled her into her arms and
hugged her tight.

Kate let herself sob into the most welcoming set of arms she
would find in Alaska. As unlikely as it might seem, she and Opal had become
friends. Kate knew Opal would be understanding, supportive of even the dumbest
things Kate could do.

After a couple minutes of letting the heart-wrenching pain
out, Kate forced herself to stop crying and tell Opal her story. “I lost my
job. I walked away from the man I’m falling in love with and I don’t know what
I’m going to do now.” Sharing her situation with Opal made her heart feel a
little less heavy.

“I’m sure if you went and talked to Carter he’d give you
your job back.” Opal smoothed a stray hair back from Kate’s face.

“I don’t want it back. Not the way things are now. He wants
me to sit around and do nothing.”

“And what’s the problem with that?” Opal didn’t understand. She
didn’t know what it felt like to be at the mercy of others, to not have
independence. She did what she wanted, whenever she wanted, held down by no
man. Men begged for her attention and she was always in control of her future.

“I want to do something of value. I want to be important. I
can’t sit around and wait for the next man to walk out on me and leave me
helpless.”

“You are not helpless. You are a very intelligent woman who
is perfectly capable of taking care of herself. In fact, you could start
working with me tonight, start making a lot of money on your own.” Opal looked
at her with a serious expression, but she couldn’t be serious, couldn’t expect
Kate to become a sporting woman. She was in a bad spot, but not even close to
where she would consider becoming a prostitute.

“I don’t think I could do what you do.” Kate knew she sounded
as shocked as she felt, even though she tried to hold her surprise in.

“No, not that. You could sell the whiskey here. Keep your
half of whatever you sell. You could keep the drinks flowing while I’m upstairs
entertaining.” Opal clasped her hands together excitedly, obviously proud of
her new plan and Kate’s involvement in it.

“So I would just sell drinks?” Kate asked hesitantly. She
wasn’t going to get herself into an even worse situation. She would live here
on the money she still had and write to her family for passage back before she
would sell her body to men.

She didn’t condemn Opal for the choice, but she didn’t have
any interest in doing it herself. Selling drinks was something she
would
consider doing. The only harm would be to her reputation, and that was on the
edge anyway because she lived in this house.

“Yeah. You could make good money, all on your own, no man
involved. Well, you have to take the money from the men, but you’ll be the one
in charge.”

“They won’t expect me to…” Kate could feel her cheeks
turning pink.

“You just tell them that I’m the only sporting woman here.” Opal’s
grin eased most of Kate’s worries.

“Okay, I’ll try it.” What could it hurt? She could sell
booze to Opal’s customers. Betsy could gossip about her with the
ladies
in town all she wanted. They probably already did.

Kate would make a quick buck working for Opal, gain a little
independence and move on. It was the perfect solution to all her problems.

“Good. Now go dry your tears and put on something nice. We’re
opening for business soon.” There was excitement in Opal’s voice that Kate
found contagious, made her forget about all the drama in her own life.

The rest of the evening went by in a blur. Kate flirted with
men, sold them drinks, had some fun and made a lot of money.

“You want to take me upstairs, honey?” an older man asked
Kate.

“That’s Opal’s position, not mine.” She was caught a little
off guard by the question, but he seemed to accept her answer without argument.

“Well, then how about another drink?” he asked.

“I can do that.” She smiled, poured the man another and took
his money.

The door opened and Kate looked over to see who had come in.
All the breath sucked out of her chest to see Carter’s six-foot frame, and he
sure didn’t look the least bit happy when he spotted her. A scowl appeared and
his entire body tensed.

He walked straight over to her and stared down with his eyes
narrowed. “What the hell are you doing?” His words were growled, definitely
angry.

Kate took a deep breath and held her head high when she
answered him. She wasn’t going to back down from her decision to find
independence even when her knees wanted to shake and her body wanted to be
pressed up against his, wrapped in the safety of his strong arms begging for
forgiveness.

“I’m working.” Her voice cracked a little and she couldn’t
get out any more of an explanation than that.

“You had a job with me, a future with me. Why would you want
to do
this
instead?”

“You gave my job away.” She took a deep breath. “And
this
is a fine way to make money. Opal needs my help.”

Kate had known that making him angry was a possibility when
she decided to work with Opal, but she didn’t want to face the reality of it.
Having him here, knowing this could be the quick end to whatever little bit of
a romance they had started caused a piece of her heart to be torn off.