BOMAW Vol. 10-12 (44 page)

"You sonofabitch! You sonofabitch!" With every moment that he drove, his temper climbed. His fury rose to such heights tears gathered in his eyes. Flashes of his father, flashes of Shawn went through his mind. All the fights they'd ever had - all the things they'd done to make those who dealt with them aware, with a McPherson, you do not cross. And more so than anyone, not their women ... not their women. It was a law that had been branded into each of them. Jake kept seeing his father's face. Seeing another time, long ago - after Shawn and Derrick had left.

"Boy, your brothers are gone now, you the last. I'm lookin' at you and thinkin' I bes' take my girls to school myself - don't think you got what it takes t'see about'em. You tell me now, you got what it take? You know, you don't let nobody - nobody - ever think, they can mess with our lil'girls - not ours. You understand that boy? Either you got it boy, or you don't."

"I got it!"
He'd returned fiercely.

"Ain't too sure. You're not Shawn are you, can't really expect you to be like him, just not in you. Nobody fear like they fear him. Personally, I think you too pretty, too soft, think I'll be needin' to watch over you, like I do my girls."

With flaring nostrils he swore,
"They fear Shawn, they'll fear me even more."

"Em, we'll see; we'll see."

A surge of adrenal rage shot through Jake as he drove, it forced him to pull over and park the SUV. He wasn't out on a rural lane where he could release what he was feeling by gunning his engine, speeding down back roads until the sensation abated. He was in the city of Chicago and there was no space to stretch out and just drive to run it from his system. He sat a few moments gripping the steering wheel, envisioning Laek Chan and beating him to a pulp. He had to shake it, and sat back in the vehicle to calm down, taking a few deep breaths, looking around him, he was parked in front of a Chinese restaurant, and the irony of it made him chuckle and calm a bit, just a bit. Cutting the engine, he jumped out and ordered them food. He was hungry, maybe eating would help him to calm down.

He made it back to the apartment, she still wasn't home. Setting the food on the table, he grabbed a plate, fixed himself one and began eating, but his mind would not rest from Laek Chan; would not rest from what he'd done. Done to Vivian - Vivian was
his
, his lil'girl, she was going to be his wife. That alone, made her hands off to anyone. She was now, not only his, but the entire family's. She belonged to Bart, she belonged to Gert, she was Sylvia's best friend, Shanna was crazy about her, and Shawn thought the world of her. She'd met Derrick and Meribel - she was almost completely, a family fixture. And all of the family knew - she belonged to him. It was a silent code that he was responsible for her. He could not let this pass. He could not allow anyone to step within the law established by being a McPherson - he could not. It would be easier to get a starving dog to ignore a savory t-bone steak left alone with it, than to get Jake to shake this from his mind.

He'd been eating slow, thinking, when he heard the keys jingling, the sounds of packages and her hustling to get inside.

"Jake? You here? I dropped Sheila off and Dennis said that you were here." She asked, setting down her things and walking through the short hall into the kitchen. She was smiling when she walked in, but one look at his face and the smile slid from her's. The whole time she'd spoken to him, entering the house, not a word had he said.

"Jake? Are you mad because I went shopping? Let me tell you now, all of that stuff, I got-..."

"Fuck - shopping! Think I give a shit about you going shopping?" He barked angrily, standing at the table suddenly, "Here, wanna fuckin' go shopping..." He pulled out his wallet and tossed hundreds of dollars at her, two flicks of his hand, two bunches of bills flew across the table, some landing on the floor. "There! Go shopping!"

"What's wrong with you? Where'd you get that money?"

"What's wrong with me?! I can tell you now, it's not you shopping - nor is it about money! What happened at work the other day? That same day I called you! The day you were at Sheila's! The day I fuckin' knew something was not right in your voice! What happened that day?!" He demanded.

Vivian gulped, with wide eyes she stood staring, seriously afraid of what she was seeing. She couldn't speak, words were trapped in her throat, lodged deep within her chest.

"ANSWER ME! WHAT HAPPENED THAT DAY!?" He bellowed furiously, his anger was right back at the top again.

"You've been talking to Dennis?"

"Talking to Dennis, to Sheila - that's the only way I get to find out what the hell is going on with you. So now, you tell me, what happened that day?"

"Since you've spoken to Dennis, you already know, no sense in me going over it with you again." She stood with her stomach gripped in nervous tension.

"I wanna hear it from you."

"No need, I'm sure the story is still the same."

"Fine, I'll reiterate then shall I? Dear ol'Dr. Chan came to your job, scaring the living shit out of you, waving about a toy pistol, that about right?"

"He was just - just messing with my head. Harassing me, because I won't take him back, it - it was just an ugly joke."

"Then why aren't you laughing? Hm? You told Sheila and Dennis, did they laugh? Don't think so. Jokes are usually funny, I'm not laughing. You called in today, why? Why really?"

She could only stare at him.

"He scared you that bad."

She didn't know what to say, to deny it would be ridiculous at this point. Right now, all she wanted to do was go to him, have him wrap those arms around her and tell her it was okay, he was there for her. But as she could see, he wasn't exactly in that type of mode at the moment.

"You know what this means don't you?"

That spurned her to speak, "What?"

"You're out of here-..."

"Jake - no! I can't!"

"YOU'RE FUCKING - OUT - OF - HERE!!!"

She burst into tears, her hands flying to her face, "Please Jake, I can't just walk off of my job like that!" She cried, starting to plead with him.

With his hand up to halt anything she had to say, "I don't wanna hear it! We're loading up the truck and the SUV with what's left of your things and you're out of here."

"Jake please, please listen to me..." Tears were rolling, "... I'm willing to go - but I have to do my two weeks - I have to."

"You are starting to really - really piss me off!"

"I'm not trying to piss you off! You don't understand, I've worked long and hard-..."

"I do not wanna hear this!" He growled.

"Jake pleeease..."

"You know what, you wanna stay - fine - where is he?"

"Huh?"

"You heard me, I asked, where is he!"

She really started pouring then, "This is why I didn't tell you! We don't need this kind of trouble, please Jake, just listen to me!"

"LISTEN TO WHAT?! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DO, VIVIAN!?"

Upstairs, for a woman of her age, Ms Earthaleen's ear was glued to the floor as Jake's deep resonating voice bounced off the walls and penetrated the floor boards. Ms Earthaleen worked her way back up on her feet leaning on her bed and went to the phone, calling upstairs, Lydia answered, "Hello?"

"They fightin' down there, already! She done did something, got him all mad..."

"Ms Earthaleen, look now..."

"...hear him say somethin' 'bout some other man. He shouten up a storm down there..."

"Ms Earthaleen, look, they a young couple..."

"... you need t'hear him, he just - just F'in this - f'in that - surprised you can't hear'em. Em hm, I knew it wud'en gone last. She 'bout out there cheaten on'im, I think I hear somethin' bout some doctor."

"Ms. Earthaleen, please mind your own business, all couples fight sometimes."

"You can ig'nor it you want to, but the way he carryin' on, he gone be whuppin' on'ha in a minute. Black gal like that can hol' no man like that - she too black, he don' already tol'ha get out!"

"Ms Earthaleen, I don't think he'll be hitting on her, nor would he be putting her out, please stay out of their business."

"I ain't tryin' t'be in they business! It's these thin flo's - I can hear it all - if they ain't doin' the hoochie koochie, carryin' on - they fightin' - and I mean he blarin' sista'."

"Ms. Earthaleen - put your TV on or something, I'm sure they'll be calming down soon."

"You ain' goin' down there?"

"No ma'am I'm not." Lydia answered right away.

"Then I need to go'on down there."

"No ma'am you don't - now I'm tellin'yah - leav'em alone."

"She gone be hollin' fo'help in minute - need t'call the po'lice naw."

"Look here Ms Earthaleen - she in love with him, he in love with her - I know that - seen it for myself. Leave - them - alone."

"Hmph - I'ah leave'em - but they stress'in me - I can't take no stress - I'm ol' - Lemme get on back here and listen fo'he kill'ah - bye."

"WELL? WHO THE FUCK IS HE, THAT I SHOULD LET HIM GET AWAY WITH THAT? WHEN I FIND HIM, MY FUCKIN' FOOT-...."

"Jake! Stop yelling! She gone hear everything you saying!" Vivian cried pointing at their ceiling.

He realized she was right, having forgotten about Ms. Earthaleen. He walked in circles, hands on his hips blowing to calm down, then turned back to glare at her. "I want to know where he works - where he lives. I wanna know now." He demanded, his eyes blazing furious.

"Can you first just - calm down a minute? Please ... just ... take a few more deep breaths and listen to me - please."

"Why? I know what you're gonna say, Vivian! You cannot possibly expect me to get up in the morning and drive back home as if - nothings happened here. That is not who I am! I am - my father's son! I am not made - to just turn my back and walk away - sorry - don't let this face fool you baby - don't let the face fool you. Now - once more - here we are - you and I - at a draw! You have a choice - you wanna stay here? Tell me where he is - let me go and deal with him, you can stay."

"No Jake - no! Please don't go looking for him!"

"I tell you what, I'll just have a little talk with him, that's all - just a little talk."

Worrying her lip, Vivian thought about it, "You promise, you're just gonna talk?"

"Hang on here, you worried about him, or me?"

"How can you ask me that!? I don't give a shit about him! But I don't want things to get out of control - and I don't want you getting hurt - or - arrested." She wiped at her eyes, still pleading with him to understand.

"I tell you what - you that worried about me - get ready to head back with me - you're gonna be my wife! You're gonna have to learn, that what I say, goes! I give in to you, over and over and its getting so - you don't give a shit about what I want - what I say!"

"That's not true Jake! You want me to do things the way you want them, but I'm not like you! I've worked too long and hard to build my employee profile! If I were to walk away now, and end up needing a job later on - this job is my last job reference! How's it gonna look -
oh
-
she put in her final notice and then showed up only two days and then never saw her again.
I don't want that said about me Jake! Not when it comes to a job, when it comes to work! It took me years to build my reputation - I'm not gonna throw it away! Its easy for you to say, just walk away, because come what may, you as a white male - will always land on your feet!"

"Not true." He tried to deny.

"Bull! The world is dying to give you shit! That same world, just wishes I would die! I am a black woman and we do not always land on our feet! I screw this up for myself and I might as well cut my own legs off at the shins. I have - to see my final notice through! I'm not going to flush away, everything I've done - my shinning work record - because Laek Chan is tripping!" She stood her ground, breathing hard, praying with all her might that he would listen to her. She swiped at the tears rolling, scared because she loved him dearly - even now, that he stood furious and determined. She wasn't stupid however, she'd seen it happen too many times, women giving up everything to totally depend on a man that ended up leaving her with nothing and needing a job, and couldn't get one, because they had no references or work record. Well she had one - and she was keeping it as clean as she'd maintained it all of these years.

Jake ran his hand across his face trying to think and calm down.

She slowly approached him, cautiously putting her arms around him. "Baby please, it's just - 9 more days, that's all."

"Yeah, 9 days for anything to happen, 9 days that he could use to get to you."

"Nothings going to happen Jake."

He stared down into her eyes, wrapped his arms around her, good and tight, leaned down close to her face, looking it over, "You know why, nothings going to happen? Because you're going to tell me where I can find him, and then I'm going there so that he and I - can have a little talk. That's why. Because once more, you have a choice of that, giving me what I ask for, or - telling me - to fuck off - once and for all."