Both Sides Of The Fence 3: Loose Ends (27 page)

BOOK: Both Sides Of The Fence 3: Loose Ends

4.01Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub

Read Book Download Book

ads

Grace’s Epilogue

I’m Doing Me

I sat on the deck of my mother’s house, but it was mines now. I thought that I would be an absolute crazy person right now. Who would have thought that I was still hanging in there? I have been here in this house for a year now and I am loving it. I have been through counseling and I am working on me. I am so happy about it too. I am still at the same school as David, but now I am a dean. My life is moving in the right direction and I can’t stop smiling. Yes, sometimes I get a glimpse of my past when I dwell on the past, but I am getting over that as well. David calls and checks up on me and I am glad that we are still friends even after all of this mess. I even helped him adopt a sweet little girl. He is such a good father. You can tell that he was made to be one too. He so in love with her and she is enamored with him. At times I want to get jealous because I still feel a little cheated out of a regular life. A normal family, but it is what it is. God still loves me and I know that. I have no doubt in my mind.

I still have my bestfriend, Rebecca and we are closer than ever. In fact, she decided to move in with me so that we can be close to one another. We do everything together. Rebecca and I learning to be up-front about identities, with ourselves and others. She had a new man now and he knew all about her and loved her for her. I was just hoping to find the same one day. But for now I was happy with me doing just me. Nobody else’s extra baggage. I had tons of my own that I was still unloading. I will know when it is time to start another relationship, but until then, I’m doing me.

David’s Epilogue

We are Family

“There you go, Amiyah.” My adopted daughter and I were in my backyard playing with the Hula Hoops that we brought from Wal-Mart today. She was five years old and she consumed most of my time. But it was worth it. It was what I dreamed of all my life. A family of my own. And even though I didn’t have a wife to share it with I was content with just me and her.

“I got it Daddy! ... I got it!” She twirled and twirled. She was growing up so fast. I was so excited to have her here in my life.

“I see ... I see.” A smile plastered my face. I can’t say I don’t have any depressing days but I do notice some good changes in me. I am more honest with myself and I am more honest with people.

Two years have passed and Grace and I are officially separated. I can’t say that I don’t miss her. We did share a house and a life for over thirty years together and one just doesn’t get over being with someone for so long just because they split apart or broke up. I have been doing the counseling thing for the last past two years as well and I am getting a fresh start. I know what you are saying, why bring a child into my life when I still have some issues. The truth is, she’s helping me and she doesn’t even know it. She my anchor. She keeps me focused. Children keep parents focused, most of the time.

Parents know they have a responsibility to that child or children and they have to push to make a home for them all. That is what I plan on doing; making a home for the both of us.

Grace and I talk periodically about what is going on in our life and what we are learning in our sessions. It’s a part of the healing process for us both. And our agreement still stands at work; we are still married, but just on paper. I know what you are thinking, it’s still lying. But you have to understand that people just wouldn’t understand or tolerate it for all that matters. People are still prejudiced against gays and even though they may not show it, it is still present, just like any other prejudice.

My mom, my brothers, and I have bond as a family as well. We have dinner together several times a month. We are stronger than ever. My mom loves being a grandmother. She can’t get enough of Amiyah.

A couple of years ago, I didn’t think it would end up like this. You know, happy. But with God and family, anything is possible. Anything. The love I have for myself and my family transcends all of my prior and present issues.

Shawn’s Epilogue

Home Again

I sat in my seat at the gate where Ashley and Alex’s plane would be landing. BWI airport was bustling so waiting for Ashley and Alex’s flight to arrive was a breeze. Mona decided to stay home with the kids, while I picked them up. I was kind of glad to come alone. I can say I was an extremely proud father. I had successfully raised two brilliant children. They both made me really proud. I am learning that raising children isn’t a science. There is no one book that can tell you how to handle certain situations when it comes to raising them. I learned understanding, love, and patience is the key. I also learned that they are going to have to go through some things no matter what I do to shield them from it.

Mistakes and mess-ups were a part of life and everybody gets their turn. Ashley and Alex sure did get theirs, but they both were better for it now. They didn’t share their entire experience away from home with me and some things I know need not be said. It was lessons for them and their lives. I just hoped that they learned from them. I’m glad that I still get to be Dad to them.

I sat in my chair with my iPod on listening to some gospel music. I was in good spirits and I loved being that way. My own practice, a loving wife, two graduates, and two more teens and a little one. I had a full life.

A half hour later, I noticed Ashley and Alex coming off of the plane. I have to admit I got a little misty- eyed seeing my two babies coming toward me. If Mona was standing next to me, I knew she would have run up to them and squeezed them with all of her might. I was a real man now and that is what I did I ran up to my children and squeezed them with all that I could. I was a blubbering mess. I cried so hard it was hard to see. They were successful, even with all of me and their mother’s slipups and all of the drama. I cried so hard I trembled.

“I love you guys so much.” I kissed both of them on the cheek right there in the middle of everything that was going on. You would have thought that they had just come home from war. It in fact was war they had come home from. It was one they had on the inside. I’ve learned that we all have personal wars going on inside of us. And that we need to have each others’ backs in these personal wars. “I am so proud of you two. So proud.”

“We know, Dad.” As usual they looked around a little embarrassed at this display of emotion that was going on in front of the world. But little did they know that they too would have even more tests and drama in their life that would teach them to be them regardless of where they are. This was the beginning of their lives. I prayed that they learned from the drama they survived back in California, but I know that life is about the expected and unexpected. I raised them the best I could and I know that God is with them and cares for them far more than I ever could. I was just temporary.

We made our way toward the baggage claim, picked up their bags and jumped on the shuttle to get to our car.

I let Ashley drive home.

“So what are you guys going to do tomorrow?” I asked curiously.

“Sleep in.” They both chimed in together and laughed. I totally understood. Everyone needed a break after finishing college, even if it was only for a few days.

“Well, you guys know that you will have to share rooms. And you guys might not like what your brother and sister have done in your absence.” I laughed as we drove.

When we pulled up to the house it was a little dark, but I could see the lights on in the living room. As soon as I opened the door, Ashley and Alex were bombarded with kisses and hugs from Mona, my mom, her mom and their brothers and sisters.

“My babies are home,” Mona exclaimed with tears in her eyes. My baby still looks good. I was definitely hitting that tonight. We were closer than ever and we couldn’t get enough of each other.

Everybody gathered together in the dining room, where there was a huge spread of delicious food that Mona, my mother, and her mother took time to cook.

I prayed over the food and we ate ’til we were all stuffed. It was a great time indeed. We talked and danced and sang karaoke. None of us knew what tomorrow would hold. But I am sure we can handle it. We’ve been through much and yet we are still here, by the grace of God.

A Closing Letter to the Reader

Well, you made it through book three. Take a breath, sit back and relax. Thank the Lord God that you didn’t have to experience anything in these three books and if you did, you survived. There was so much going on in these books that it made my head spin and probably yours as well. There were some scenes that were over the top and just downright nasty. But they served a purpose not to just entertain, but to enlighten and educate at the same time. I dared myself to do certain things and I did it. For most, the response from readers was shocking and sometimes appalled, but the point was made. I personally thank you, the reader and friend, for picking up these three books and giving it a chance. Simply because I took a chance. Fail or win. Some say my faith or Christianity was questionable because I wrote it the way I did. The books did not define me and I am proud of my salvation and didn’t need to defend something that was freely given in spite of me. I am not saying that it was right. I’m just stating the facts. At many times during the writing process I wanted to stop and walk away. Thank God I had friends and loyal readers like yourself that pushed me to keep it moving and finish what I started. I can’t name them all so I’ll just say it.... Thank you, everyone! Everyone with encouraging words, criticism and simply ... love. It was appreciated and noted in my heart.

Both Sides of the Fence,
the series was an experience for me. An unplanned one too. When I sit back and think about all of it, I am so grateful that these three books happened. It pushed me to finish what I started. And helped me to set goals and get it done. I can’t tell you how many people have confessed to being molested to me, men and women, and experiment on that other side of the fence and I was able to tell them that they can get help and where to find it. It also saddens me to realize that so many people’s story won’t get told because of shame or grief. I myself, never being molested, really could never put it into words how to deal with the act or violation therein. I commend people that do get help and do confess these deeds. I pray for the victims and the ones that were the predators as well. They need just as much help as the one they victimized, but that gets overlooked by severity of the crime. Chances are the molester was molested and the cycle can be continued if not dealt with appropriately. I’m not speaking as an advocate for either, but as a call to give help and compassion to both parties. It’s just right.

When I think of the Black family in my book and the black family in America, I think that we can do better. Most of our problems stem from lack of communication and listening to that communication. We keep secrets and we even take some to the grave, supposedly, but unbeknownst to those who did so, they left those loose ends for the living to tie up and/or deal with after they are gone. Drugs, violence, are discussed on a regular, but molestation and homosexuality in men and women go untalked about. There may be someone in your family that has been molested or tampered with but fear of judgment or shame causes them to keep it all in, which in turn comes out in adverse ways: promiscuity, drugs, homosexuality, and violence are some the ways people that may have been molested act out, but are not limited to just those attributes alone. It varies greatly.

Take a real good look at your family. Are you talking about your problems or are you just pushing them under a rug? Pretty soon that rug is going to develop lumps and then hills, and then mountains. Please don’t wait until it’s too late to discuss it or we are burying a loved one because of a secret that we let take them out. Your children are waiting for you to talk to them and it is time for
you
to start talking to your children or any family member that you see in need of help. The time is now for the black family to get it together and stop letting the enemy in us and in the world take what God has promised us:Life and life more abundantly. So let’s start talking so we can truly start living.

Peace and Blessing, M.T. Pope

PLEASE.... PASS THE WORD, NOT THE BOOK

Look for me on:

www.facebook.com/mtpope

www.myspace.com/mtpope

www.wix.com/mtpope/bothsidesofthefence

www.urbanbooks.net

www.twitter.com/mtpope

Purchase my books on:

Please leave a brief review, if possible. Thanks

www.amazon.com

www.barnesandnoble.com