Bounce Down: 1st Quarter: Start of Play (24 page)

“
You won’t
be, I want to know how you’re doing.”

“
And what my
answer will be?”

“
That
too.”

The night out with the boys
didn’t eventuate, as word came through late in the afternoon about
a stabbing at an office Christmas party. It was just as well
Brendon was going away, because I wouldn’t be able to see him
anyway.

As the victim’s life hung in
the balance, the team leapt into action in their usual efficient
manner, leaving me in the office manning the phones and processing
any information received.

The person responsible had been
identified, but there were still witness statements to be taken, as
well as evidence to be collected. Also, the scene needed to be
preserved until Forensics took over. Eventually the team was back
in the office with the unhappy, slightly dishevelled middle-aged
male suspect, who was deposited into one of the interview
rooms.

Even as I
typed up the ROI, I couldn’t stop thinking about everything.
How could I not think about it?
This was so much more than deciding whether to
break up with someone or not. My mind went over and over the
different possible outcomes; will he still want me like I am, will
he change his mind, could I go through with it, for him?

“
Cheers!”

We were at Paddy’s Bar, an
Irish pub located five minutes from CIB HQ.

I downed my first drink for the
evening. It had been so long since I’d been out with my old work
mates. Apart from Jo, Mel and Bec, I was not surprised to see some
of the Drug Squad guys there as well. It really felt like old
times, happier less complicated times.

The girls had been disappointed
Friday had been called off, so they had suggested Saturday night
instead and although I didn’t feel like going out, they had managed
to change my mind.

“
Where’s
Brendon?” I was not ready for Mel’s casual question as we were
returning from the toilet.

“
Melbourne,
visiting family.”

“
So he won’t
be spending Christmas with you, that’s pretty bad form.” She
appeared surprised he had gone away without me.

I couldn’t help laughing at her
comment, but felt compelled to defend him. “Hey, we’ve only known
each other a couple of months.”

“
It seems
longer.”

“
We met in
early November, I remember because the Fremantle Festival was on
the same weekend.”

Wow,
we
had
only known
each other for a short amount of time and here I was contemplating
having a surgical procedure, because my boyfriend of two months,
asked me to. Of course, I had to remind myself he was not my
boyfriend.

I recalled he had said I would
never be his girlfriend and then a week ago, he alluded to the fact
things would be different, if I agreed. Why did I feel like he was
blackmailing me and what guarantees did I have things would change,
if I had the surgery?

“
And when’s
he coming back?”

Mel’s
question pulled me back to the present. “Not until the
2
^nd
.”

She shook her
head and gave me that
bad form
look again, but didn’t express her opinion as we
re-joined the others at the bar.

Christmas Eve was always a fun
day at work. Naturally if there were incidents to attend to things
would be different, but thankfully this Christmas Eve there weren’t
any. There were the usual foods and beverages to be consumed, as
well as the Secret Santa. Of course our Secret Santa had to be
different from the norm.

One guy
received some bras because of his body shape, another got condoms
because he was with a different girl almost every week and someone
else’s was a huge packet of potato chips because it was his
favourite snack. Peter got a cute
Daddy’s
Boy
T-shirt for his son and I got a
Christmas top. After everyone had received their gifts, Steve came
forward with one more present for me.

“
What’s the
extra one for?” I was puzzled, as traditionally we each received
one gift only.

Steve shrugged his shoulders.
“It was delivered to security downstairs. They contacted me about
it, because it had to be checked out first.”

This made no sense, no-one
would send me a present here. I glanced around and saw they were
waiting for me to open it. It then hit me who it was from and I
knew I couldn’t possibly open it in front of the whole squad.

I felt myself blush. “Um, I
think I’ll open it later.”

Several good-natured protests
followed, but eventually I made it back to my desk with the
wrapping still intact.

Later, alone
in my bedroom, I finally opened Brendon’s gift, or more correctly,
gifts. Along with Wild Orchid, another steamy movie starring Mickey
Rouke, there were several items of lingerie; beautiful bras and
knickers, black suspenders and silk stockings, as well as a black
lace teddy. Written on the Christmas card were the words,
‘
Merry Christmas Suzie – Brendon
x.’

I was moved
by the gesture and sent him a text, ‘
Merry
Christmas - thanks for my present – Im sorry I didnt get you
anything
.’

His reply
came through within minutes, ‘
All I want
is a yes.’

No pressure.
My response was blunt, ‘
I know what you
want but I still need more time x’

The next day I met with my
family to enjoy a typical Price family tradition; Christmas lunch,
roast turkey and all the trimmings, followed by mum’s famous
trifle. Plus, there were always the Christmas carols playing in the
background.

I felt
melancholy when
All I Want for
Christmas
came on. All I wanted was
Brendon. I didn’t want to change the way he looked, even if I
hadn’t like the size of his nose.

Both Aiden and I always made
sure we were there, sometimes with partners and sometimes, like
this year, on our own. It seemed more special when it was just the
four of us. The reason we always had a lunchtime celebration, was
because I was usually out Christmas night with Jeanette at the
Casino, but this year was the exception.

I definitely had post-Christmas
blues, I acknowledged as I sat at my desk back after a few days
off. I wondered why each of those days had seemed like an eternity.
Of course, it would have gone quicker if I had gone out, especially
over the weekend, but my heart wasn’t in it. It was the second last
day of the year and I only had a few days until Brendon returned,
until I needed to make my decision.

“
So, what’s
your New Year’s resolution, being more open with your friends?” The
voice came from behind me. I had been wool-gathering,
again.

I turned to face him. “Ha-ha
Peter, very funny. And what’s yours, minding your own
business?”

After he had
returned to the squad room, I began to think about what, in fact,
my New Year’s resolution would be. Over the last few years my
resolutions had all been about self-improvement, from going on a
diet, joining a gym or fitness class, to taking up cycling.
So why should this year’s be any
different?

Having
cosmetic surgery was self-improvement, right? I shook my head. No,
surely I wasn’t trying to justify it to myself as a New Year’s
resolution? Was I that desperate to keep Brendon in my life? Would
it mean we would be exclusive and I could get rid of that other
woman’s clothes? Conversely, I wondered what life would be like
without Brendon in it.
Could I let him
go?

Later in the
afternoon, I sent him a text, ‘
Ive made my
decision
’

I was not surprised my mobile
rang a few minutes later. As soon as I answered the call, I reeled
off the words I had prepared. “Before you ask, I want to tell you
in person.”

“
I want you
to tell me now.” Amazingly, he was still making demands, even from
the other side of the country.

“
Maybe I
should rephrase that, I
need
to tell you in person.”

He made no comment and I broke
into the silence. “I can’t talk, I’m at work. I’ve gotta go; I’ll
tell you when you get back.” I hung up quickly before he could
speak.

“
Brendon?” I
glanced at the clock and saw it was after midnight. Why would he be
calling so late? Diane and I had both gone to bed ages
ago.

“
Open the
door.”

“
What door,
why?” I asked. He wasn’t making sense.

“
I’m
downstairs.”

“
Oh… really?”
His words began to filter through to my brain.

“
Yes really,
now are you going to open the god damn door or not?”

I could not quite believe my
eyes that he was here in the flesh, in my bedroom. I was in
shock.

“
I’m back, so
now you can tell me.”

Oh my god, he was unbelievable!
He had flown back late at night, because he couldn’t wait for my
answer. I felt self-conscious; I was wearing cotton shorts and a
tank top, while he was decked out in a suit, no less.

I delayed my
response with a question. “Why couldn’t you wait until the
2
^nd
?”

He came towards me and grasping
my chin, bent my head back and leant over to kiss me firmly on the
lips. His tongue forced them apart and then he devoured my mouth,
with an intensity I was both surprised and thrilled by. His mouth
eventually released mine; I felt dazed and a little
light-headed.

He was breathing hard as he
answered. “When I want something, I generally get it, without
having to wait.”

“
I must be
something of a disappointment to you then.”

Was it
concern I saw on his face? “Don’t say that, don’t
ever
say that
again.”

He took a step back and stared
at me so intently, it made me feel uncomfortable. He sighed and
raked his fingers through his hair. “Regardless of what your answer
is, I want you to come back to my place because…”

“
I don’t
think that’s a good idea.”

He gave a short laugh. “I see
you still like to interrupt me. What am I going to do with you?” He
was shaking his head as he spoke and I was ashamed to admit it, but
I felt aroused at his words.

I blushed, lowered my eyes and
bent my head, more from my wanton feelings, than guilt at
interrupting him. He came closer and again raised my chin, this
time with one finger. “Because… it’s a little crowded here, don’t
you think?”

“
You want to
go now?”

“
Yes,
now.”

I had told him to be quiet
because Diane was sleeping, but now he wanted to use it as an
excuse to take me home and what?

Well, I guess I could play
along and see what his next move would be.

“
Okay. I have
to get changed.”

He nodded and sat on my
armchair, with his legs stretched out and arms crossed over his
chest. Obviously he was going to watch.

“
Wouldn’t you
be more comfortable waiting downstairs while I get
ready?”

“
No thanks,
I’m fine as I am.”

I could feel his eyes on me, as
I searched for something to wear. In the end, I purposely chose
non-Brendon, non-sexy clothes; my favourite Cold Chisel T-shirt,
grey cargo pants and flat slip-on sandals.

“
By the way,
why are you wearing a suit?”

“
I had a
function I couldn’t get out of and then I went straight to the
airport.”

I didn’t realise we had to take
my car. He had caught a taxi straight from the airport, not
bothering to stop at his place. What if I hadn’t been home, then
what? No doubt he would have waited for me, like last time.

When driving,
I always listened to the radio and tonight was no exception.
Christina Aguilera’s
Beautiful
came on and I could not help but think about the
lyrics and how they related to me, or not as the case may be. The
longer the song went, the more melancholy I became. I wanted to
change the station, but didn’t want him to know how deeply it
affected me.

He held my hand as we climbed
the steps and he led me inside his house. Now I understood why he
wanted me here, this was his domain where he reigned.

After relieving me of my purse,
he took my hands. “Now we’re alone, face to face, you can tell me
your decision.”

As I gazed up at him, images of
the past two months replayed in my head; our meeting in the park,
the discipline along with our sexual encounters; with only a few
that could be called lovemaking. He was always in control.

“
You hinted I
would be your girlfriend if I agreed.” He nodded in
confirmation.

“
What does
that mean? How would our relationship be different?”

“
It will be
the more you’ve been wanting.”

I was waiting for him to
elaborate but instead he continued to stare down at me, his
expression unreadable. “What, exactly, does that mean?”

He sighed at my question. “It
means all and sundry will know you’re my girlfriend.”