Bound by Her Best Friend (A Club Smex Story) (11 page)

“I wish I could,” he sighed. “But I’ve never been able to make you do anything, Sparks. Not when we were kids and certainly not now. You know I want you. You know how much. But this between us is going to be equal. There’s nothing I can do now but leave you to decide where we go from here.”

Chapter Seventeen

Freya sat slumped down in her armchair, wine glass in hand, Zak’s M.I.T top pulled around her knees so that her entire body was covered. The heating was on full blast—screw the God damn bill—and for once the trashy television was off. Freya couldn’t deal with raised voices tonight. She’d had enough of those today.

She gritted her teeth slightly as she lifted the glass to take a sip, a hundred odd voices playing through her mind. School had been a nightmare as usual. Enough that she’d actually gone to see the principal to complain about the behavior of some of the pupils she was helping to teach. He’d nodded and made all the right noises, but Freya knew nothing was going to change. Perhaps it was time that she started looking for another position?

She paused at that thought, because though she’d flirted with the possibility of moving to a new school, she’d never really given it proper consideration. Maybe she could even think about taking some extra classes, looking to better herself a little?

She scowled at that thought, because it felt too much like she’d be doing it, was thinking it, because of what she’d said to Zak.

I have no prospects.

Only she didn’t, she admitted to herself with brutal honesty, and maybe it was time to start considering it, to start planning on how she could change it. Wasn’t now, if ever, the time to take a good hard look at herself?

Freya sighed at that thought and took another sip of her boxed wine. She had all intentions of getting through the entire boxful by night end, after all she had nothing else to look forward to.

You’re first Thursday alone.

Because Zak, true to his promise, had not contacted her since the morning he’d dropped her home from the club, not a phone call, not a message, not even a text, which was why she was alone. He was giving her time. Just like he’d said.

Too much time.

Freya sighed and stood up, enjoying the rare feel of hot air from the heaters on her skin, but in an absent sort of way. Her heart ached too much for it to be otherwise.

“Zak,” she sighed. “Where the hell are you?”

She cast a look at her cell, sitting on the edge of the armchair, its screen so silent and blank, and picked it up. It was an older cell, but it had a camera, albeit a shitty one. Unable to help herself Freya opened an album she’d titled,
Zak and Me
. A couple of dozen pictures were held within the album, Zak and her at various times, mostly in her apartment. There was one, from a few years back, taken at one of Zak’s parties. It might even have been the last party she’d attended within him. Freya looked closely, suddenly seeing things in the picture that she’d never noticed before. The way she looked so tense, a fixed grin on her face. How attractive Zak looked in his suit…and how close he held her to him.

She tilted the screen a little and squinted at it. Zak wasn’t even looking into the camera she’d held out in front of them. He was looking at her, desire clear in his eyes. How the fuck could she have missed it for so long?

She tapped out of the gallery app and pulled up Zak’s number. A moment later and her cell was pressed against her ear, a second after that and she clicked the phone off. It was too soon. She wasn’t ready. She needed more time.

Part of her wished, had wished all week long, that Zak would just turn up. Pin her down on the bed again and force her to give in to his demands. That was the easy way out, though. Abandoning all responsibility and letting him decide.

Equal partners.

Wasn’t that what he had said?

Allowing him to simply fuck her into submission would set the tone for their relationship, and that tone would be all wrong.

“Is there even going to be a relationship?” she muttered to herself. “If you don’t sort yourself out soon there probably won’t be. Zak will give up on you.”

She pulled a face and headed for the kitchen, her heart heavy, because, Zak probably
wouldn’t
give up on her. He’d waited so long.

It still blew her mind when she thought of that, of how long he’d wanted her, never once crossing the line, never doing anything to tip the balance in the wrong direction. Maybe if she hadn’t found the Club Smex invitation they’d be sitting together right now, eating take out, her oblivious to the man sat right next to her.

She’d been such a fucking fool.

Pulling out a loaf of bread and a packet of cheese, Freya placed them on a plate and then grabbed a glass. She didn’t even want to eat, but appetite desertion or not she still needed something in her belly. Zak would chide her so bad if he was here, and he
would
be again, she reassured herself as she opened the cutlery drawer. Soon she would be ready and Zak would come around and then…

Her hand stilled on the cutlery, her heart gave a little leap. Freya swiveled on the spot, clutching the work surface as she did so. It couldn’t be, no fucking way!

The door closing, footsteps in the creepy hall, a door opening, and then…

Zak strode into the kitchen, dropped the bottle of wine he’d brought over onto the counter, looked up and shot her a grin.

“Hey, Sparks.”

Freya’s mouth opened, closed, and then opened again. “You…what…you…”

Zak smirked, that same smirk she’d fallen for the first time she ever seen it. He held out his arms and gestured her forward, his entire demeanor saying that she’d had all the time he intended to give her, and she’d better be fucking ready.

“What are you doing here?” she finally gasped.

The smirk widened. “It’s Thursday. I’ve come to catch up with my best friend.”

“But—”

“Oh,” he added, striding forward. “She also happens to be girlfriend.”

Chapter Eighteen

Girlfriend.

Everything clarified the moment Zak said those words. All the worries, the confusion, it all disappeared the second she gasped and looked into his eyes. Freya dropped the handle of the knife in her hand and raced forward, straight into Zak’s arms.

He caught her and held tight. He was wonderfully warm and, so solid. He smelled, as always, of that wonderful spice of his.

Freya breathed it all in, breathed him in. Her heart racing, her stomach flipping. Zak was here!

“You’re pleased to see me then?” he laughed.

“So pleased,” she gasped against his shoulder. “So pleased.”

“About fucking time.”

Freya pulled back, caught his gaze and shivered. This was Zak,
her Zak
, the man she’d spent every Thursday with for the past decade, and yet it wasn’t him. It was a Zak who made her tingle. A Zak who made her realize that she hadn’t brushed her hair or shaved her legs, or even bothered putting clean panties on.

God…

“You look beautiful,” he whispered. “I’ve missed you, Sparks.”

“Zak, I am so sorry. I was such an idiot.” The words rushed from her mouth, everything that had been brewing in her for so many days suddenly wanting out.

“Frey—”

“No, let me finish,” she gasped. “I thought and thought whilst we were apart. I didn’t know how to add the two of us together, but I realize now. I understood the moment you walked through the door. God, I have been so stupid!”

“I won’t argue with that.”

She swatted him on the arm, and the moment she did so, Freya was pulled back a couple of weeks. The teasing felt, normal, and yet underneath it was the sizzle of tension, the burn of desire.

“I’m sorry,” she said again. “I was such a bitch.”

“Doesn’t matter now,” he whispered. “It does not matter. This is all I wanted.”

His lips found hers in a crushing embrace. Freya melted into it, legs shaking as Zak plundered her with his tongue. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pushed her body against his. His erection was already apparent.

“Bedroom?” he asked.

Her knees weakened some more. She had only one word to say. “Yes.”

He picked her up like she weighed nothing, and Freya was not an especially light woman, but there she was in his arms, being swept all romance style into her bedroom. Freya was so excited, she didn’t even care that her bed was messy, that panties were on the floor, that a wet towel was draped over her table. 

“I want you so bad, Zak,” she moaned. “How have you done this to me?”

“I haven’t done anything,” he said. “I just woke up what was already there.”

Frantic hands pulled at each other’s clothes. Zak’s M.I.T shirt hit the lamp, dimming the light in the room. His belt smacked off the closet, and her sweats fell into the laundry basket. They collapsed onto the bed together and Freya’s head spun. She had never imagined this. Zak in her room. Zak readying to pleasure her.

It felt so right.

She should have imagined it,
should
have wanted it sooner, should have allowed herself to open up.

“So sorry,” she whispered again as he dragged her panties down her thighs.

“You get it now,” Zak said and it was not a question, but Freya answered it anyway. She answered it as he entered her, filling her with his wonderful length.

“The moment I saw you,” she gasped. “Right then. It was obvious.”

He pulled his cock out, and pushed back in, plundering her pussy with rhythmic strokes that made Freya moan. She gripped his shoulders, loving the luxury of digging her nails into his back.

He licked her neck, her jaw, along her collarbone. “It was constantly obvious.”

“We’re meant to be together, aren’t we?”

Zak stilled then, so abruptly that she cried out. “Zak? What—”

He held himself above her, the tendons in his arms corded tight. Their eyes met. Everything paused.

“Of course we are,” he said, his gaze steady, there was no hesitation there at all. “I love you, Sparks. I always have.”

She’d suspected it, wondered about it, but hearing him say the words… “Oh, Zak…why didn’t you say something,” she whispered. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

He shook his head, making their bodies move and sway in an odd fashion. “I didn’t want to lose you, and in truth, I did not realize the depth of my feelings until we made love. Up until then I longed for you, wanted you, but it was nothing like what I felt as you trembled in my arms.”

“Zak…”

“It was the moment that I entered you,” he added solemnly, “that I knew without a doubt. I am in love with you. You are mine. You always will be from this day forward. You have my heart. It’s yours. Has been since we were children.”

A deep breath and then Freya opened her mouth to say the words that were now so clear to her. She ignored the worries about the differences in their lives, about the gap. She ignored too, the terror that had filled her the moment she’d awoken in Zak’s arms. In the end it no longer mattered. This was already written.

“Zak, I love you too.”

“Truly?”

“I think I always have, but I never realized. Or maybe I did, but I denied it to myself?” She dug her nails into his shoulders again, and wiggled her hips. “Ignored it even? I don’t know. I think I put you in a box and did my damndest to keep you there.”

Zak stayed annoyingly still. “Why?” he demanded.

“I have intimacy issues,” she said slowly. “Thought you knew that, Zak.”

“I suspected.”

“They’ve always been there,” she added. “And I thought it was because my dad left, because I didn’t have a stable upbringing, but Zak, it wasn’t.”

Time for the rest. This is Zak, be honest with him
.

“It was because I wanted you,” she said, almost like a challenge. “How could I ever be close to another man when it was always you?”

“God…”

The rest of the words rushed out. Everything that she had held in, that she hadn’t even understood. “Only I thought… When we were younger, I didn’t believe I had what I needed to hold you. Then as you became so successful I really believed that. It all got confused, even I didn’t realize what was happening!”

He resumed his slow stroking. At last. “Ridiculous.”

“I know. At least, I do now.”

He stopped. “Say it again, Sparks.”

“Start moving again and I might.”

He buried himself deep. Freya’s toes tingled. “I love you, Zak.”

“Again.”

“I love you.”

“Then this is how it’s going to be? Me and you?”

“Yes,” she moaned. “Sparks and Harks.”

He thrust deep. Freya lifted her knees to take it.

“We agreed when we were nineteen to let that nickname die a quick death.”

“I might resurrect it.”

“I might spank you whenever you say it. We’ll see how mouthy you are then.” He paused, almost like he didn’t want to say the next words. “I like to spank, Frey. I like to fuck hard and dirty.”

“Good.”

“Serious?”

She lifted her knees even higher so that Zak adjusted his position and wrapped them under his arms. He penetrated her fully now, their pelvises touching, kissing almost.

“You can be as dirty as you like with me, Zak. I loved our night together. I want more…I want…”

“What.”

Freya smiled and arched her back. “The spreader bar.”

“Baby, you are going to get it, make no mistake about that. We have all the time in the world. We’re forever, Sparks, there’s no other option.”

Her smile widened, the truth of it all spreading through her body and warming her in the way that Zak’s presence, his words, his
everything
, always had done. “You know, Zak,” she said softly. “I don’t think there ever was.”

THE END