Bound by Her Best Friend (A Club Smex Story) (9 page)

Chapter Fourteen

Several hours later Zak held Freya in his arms as she slept. Her body was curled into him. Ass spooned against his dick, her legs entwined with his, her hair fluttering across his chest. The paraphernalia of their night surrounded them. Vibrators, rope, lubes, the anal plug. He’d used it all on her and more. She had taken everything he had to give and demanded he do it again.

She was exactly as he’d hoped, had lived up to his fantasies in a way he had never imagined.

This was the best night of his life.

“Freya,” he whispered and placed a light kiss on her head. She mumbled something in her sleep and snuggled in a little closer to him. That simple action was enough to make his heart pound, which made no sense, and yet in so many ways did. This was not the first time they had slept in the same bed, not even the first time he had held her in his arms, but everything was poles apart now. Zak felt like he’d finally reached the top of the mountain. Finally achieved the thing he had spent so long working towards…and he was scared.

What would Freya say when she awoke?

What would she think?

He wasn’t sure which he most dreaded. Freya turning from him and insisting it was a one off, a challenge that she’d taken him up on, and that was that. Or Freya deciding that a friends with benefits situation was perfect. That he would remain her bestie and fuck her too. Because, and it pained him to admit it, Zak was not entirely confident that Freya would look at the third option; the one that was so clear to him.

The two of them together. Like they were supposed to be.

He kissed her again, glorying in the feel of her skin below his lips, and fuck, he knew it was pathetic, knew he was so far gone that it was beyond painful, but he couldn’t help himself. He was so happy.

Being inside Freya was like nothing he had ever experienced. It felt right, natural, like it was always meant to be that way. Like her body held the missing ingredient that no other woman would ever be able to give him.

How could he give that up?

Wasn’t that why he’d held on for so long? Hoping against hope for this?

And yet, he sighed, Zak knew his best friend, better perhaps than she knew herself, and she always ran from things that made her uncomfortable emotionally. Zak doubted she even realized it, but he’d seen enough over the years to know why. He might come from a poor family, but he had never doubted their love for him, whilst Freya had made do on her own for most of her life. Her mom was a single parent, and she’d worked whatever job she could to keep them fed. Freya had spent a lot of time alone. Who even knew where her dad was? And because of that she tended to shut herself off from heavy emotions. He suspected it was why, and though he’d prefer to tell himself it was because she subconsciously pined after him, that she’d never managed to hold down a relationship.

How could he make her realize it would be different with him? Would he even be able to? She wanted him, that was the first step, but it wasn’t enough. He needed more from her than that. He always had.

“Zak?”

Her eyes were open. She was looking directly at him.

“Sparks,” he whispered.

“Why do you look so serious?” she asked. “It’s not morning yet.”

He sighed at those words, because she was confirming his thoughts without even realizing. For a moment, Zak was unsure what to do. He looked at Freya, and she at him, then—because what other options were there?—Zak leaned in to kiss the frown from her face.

He would fuck her throughout the night until she begged him to stop, until she screamed that she could not take another orgasm, telling her with his body what she was not yet ready to hear with words.

His last thought as they both, finally, slept, was that he hoped he had done enough.

Chapter Fifteen

Freya awoke slowly, which was an unusual occurrence for her. Usually she would snap her eyes open and jump straight out of bed. She’d learned, when she was in her teens, that if she didn’t she’d snooze the alarm and sleep right through the day. So this slow waking was something different, and as her eyes flickered open, and the warmth of the room surrounded her, she let her mind drift, finding the day’s thoughts with a languidness she very rarely felt…

School, laundry, gym, Zak!

The moment she thought his name everything came flooding back and Freya sucked in a sharp inhale, the relaxed feelings evaporating in a flash. He was right next to her, naked, they both were, and that was why she was so warm! His body was pressed up close, spooning her from behind. She shifted slightly and lowered her gaze.
Dear God!
One of his arms was wrapped around her waist, under the cover, holding on to her belly. The other was under her neck, holding her against him…and…his legs...they were intertwined with hers.

You fell asleep with Zak.

She shifted again, her chest thudding.

You fucked Zak…all night long.

Freya winced as her mind replayed the previous hours. Zak pining her down. Zak spreading her legs. Zak burying his face between them. More than that, the feel of his long length inside of her, pumping in and out, dragging along her clit.

You liked it.

She scrunched her eyes closed, wanting desperately to tell her mind to shut the hell up, because this was too much, it was the morning after, the reckoning she knew would come, but had ignored the night before.

You loved it.

Panic hit. Freya needed to get out from under him, and now!

She shifted again, wiggling her legs away from his and pushing his foot across the bed. He stirred slightly, mumbling something and tightening his grip around her waist.

Fuck.

Carefully, Freya reached under the cover and took his fingers, the very ones that had spent a significant amount of time inside of her.
Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.
She lifted them slowly, moving his hand back until she could lower it gently into the scant space between them. Then, as carefully as she could, Freya slithered out of the space they’d shared, only managing to breathe once she was perched on the edge of the bed with Zak still asleep.

She pushed her hair out of her face and surveyed the room. Where the hell were her clothes? The dress—if you could even call it that anymore—was nowhere to be seen. She remembered Zak unzipping the outer part and tossing it behind him, but she couldn’t see it. The only thing she
could
see was the inner strap bit. It was in the corner, decorating the spreader bar.

Freya swallowed—somewhat unsteadily—as she remembered exactly what Zak had threatened to do with that bar if she didn’t behave herself. It was shocking and yet powerfully intriguing, everything Zak had shown, and done to her, was.

She winced as she stood up, muscles she didn’t even know she had protesting her movement, and damn was she sore. Freya could feel the most sensitive parts of herself, and they were making sure she knew exactly what had happened last night.

What Zak had done to her.

And she’d loved every minute of it. Why pretend otherwise? No one had ever made her feel the way Zak had. He’d pleasured her in ways she didn’t even realize were possible, and not just the technique and the movements, but the
connection
. He made her feel…different…she turned back to take a good look at him, this man who’d turned everything on its head…

He looked peaceful asleep. It wasn’t that she’d never seen him so, but every time before he’d been curled up somewhere, usually exhausted, and he’d looked as tense as he did in everyday life. Plotting no doubt even as he dreamed. But now? She reached out an unsteady hand and pushed the locks of hair away from his forehead. He looked satisfied somehow, like there was nothing to be tense about anymore.

Freya snatched her hand back, her chest tightening at that thought. The whispered words Zak had said to her while he ruthlessly pleasured her joining the images of that pleasure in her mind. She jumped back from the bed, suddenly needing some distance between them.

Because it couldn’t be true, could it? Her best friend for so many years wanting her all along, fantasizing about her even. It seemed too bizarre.

And yet it feels right.

She gritted her teeth, ignoring that particular thought, because nothing was right about this situation. Freya couldn’t even work out how it had happened. Oh, she knew
how
. The moment Zak had admitted her wanted her, she’d given in to the feelings that had plagued her from the moment she opened that damn letter, but the real ‘how’, this weird lust between them? Freya couldn’t quite get her head around it after all these years. Until she did, she thought, the best thing to do was to get as far away from Zak as possible.

Decision made Freya crept across the room, desperately looking for the dress and her shoes. The only thing she found was Zak’s shirt, it was so long it was practically a dress, so she slipped it on, relieved to be covered up. Now, if she could just find her shoes she could get home, have a good hard think, try and work out a way forward—

“Where the hell are you going?”

Freya froze, one hand reaching out towards the sheet bunched up on the floor, the other clamped over her mouth.

“Freya?”

She turned slowly. Zak sat up in bed, a frown on his face. He looked adorable…and it scared the shit out of her.

“I need to leave,” she said quickly. “I need to go home. I can’t stay here.”

He looked at her closely, almost like her was scrutinizing her. Freya shifted and swallowed, nerves making her heart race. “Give me a minute,” he finally said. “I’ll get dressed. Come with you.”

She held up a hand, almost to ward him off, because it occurred to Freya suddenly that if Zak got out of that bed and pulled her into his arms…well, she wasn’t entirely sure she’d have the strength to resist him.

“No, Zak, I’m fine on my own.”

“Don’t be silly, my car’s here.” A pause and a smile and then, “We’ll go together, grab some breakfast on the way. Pancakes?”

“I don’t want pancakes.”

“A donut then? There’s no way you won’t want one of those.”

Christ.
This was too much. Felt like too much. “Zak, stop,” she said.

He sighed. “Is it that time already?”

“What?”

“Last night.” He said the words with a hard edge to them. His gaze was lowered to the bed, his mouth set in a tight line. Why did Freya get the feeling he had been expecting this? “Time to talk about last night.”

“I—”

He looked up. “You liked it.”

It was a statement not a question, one she could not deny. “Zak—”

“Are you going to pretend you didn’t?”

“No. It would be pretty stupid of me to pretend that I didn’t like it,” Freya sighed. “I’m sure you remember exactly how
much
I liked it.”

“Sparks, I am never going to forget the first time you screamed my name. Never.”

“Zak—”

“Or the first time you pussy tightened around me as you came, or when you wrapped those pretty little lips around my cock. Christ, Frey, do you have any idea how good that felt?”

Just a few words and her nipples were hard. Her thighs sticky from her pussy already creaming. How easy it would be to simply walk into Zak’s arms and take more of the same. But, no, it wasn’t simple at all, and
that
was the point. Already she felt like the sex was only the beginning part, the rest would come too, and Freya was not ready for that. She was terrified, painfully so, more so than she had ever been with any other man.

Like you always knew it would be.

She gasped as those words flashed through her mind. Maybe that was why she had pretended for so long, ignoring the feelings that had flared so quickly to life, because of how terrifying they were. They would have always been there, wouldn’t they? What else could explain how deeply she felt in such a short space of time?

“I need to go home,” she said, and even she could hear the slight edge of hysteria in her voice. “To think.”

Zak jumped out of bed, grabbing his trousers and stabbing his feet into them. “No,” he snapped. “You’re trying to distance yourself. You’re going to go home and think about everything that has happened, and then you’ll tell yourself why it was such a bad idea, why it can’t happen again, why you should never have done it. I know you too well,” he added when she opened her mouth to speak. “I can tell exactly what you’re thinking, I just don’t know why.”

And neither did Freya... She was completely confused. Part of her wanted to walk forward and wrap her arms around Zak, to forget that this was her best friend, the man she’d known forever, to just lose herself in the pleasure he gave her, the way he made her feel. But the other part was screaming at her to run as fast as she freaking could out the door. That part didn’t even know
why
she should be running, but right now it was the stronger of the two, and Freya wanted to listen to it.

“Why, Freya?” he prompted, and because she could not give him an answer Freya said the first thing that popped into her head—something she’d wondered from the moment she’d arrived at the club.

“How many of the women here have you actually fucked?”

His eyes widened. He ran a hand through his hair. A classic Zak-is-stalling-for-time gesture. Freya scowled, because suddenly it was very important to her that he answered the question. 

“A few.”

“How many is a few?” she asked.

“You want my number? Should I include the women from other places too? Bars? Clubs? My girlfriends?”

Freya crossed her arms over her chest. “Sure add them all up, Zak. Why not?”

“Christ, Frey,” he breathed. “I’m not going to tell you that. What’s the point? It’s in the past.”

“The past? We’re in your sex club. I’d say we’re very much in the present right now.”

He scowled. “And I’m a red blooded man, Freya.”

“Of course.”

“You knew I dated. You dated too.”

“Not as many as you.”

“You dated them for longer.”

“And that what,” she asked. “Balances it all up?

“I think it does. Hell, Frey, what do you want me to say?” he demanded. “You want the truth?”

“I don’t—”

“I couldn’t have you. So I had them.”

Oh my God
. “Zak…”

He stalked forward, grabbing her by the arms and pulling her to him. His words were pounding so hard in her mind Freya did not even think to stop him. “You heard,” he growled. “There’s your truth. There’s the lie that’s sat between us for the last decade. It’s always been you, Freya.”

Her heart thudded, and her head spun. Freya took a step back, not even sure where she was going, just that she needed space. Zak held her fast.

“You can’t say that.”

“Why the fuck not?” he demanded. “I’m sick of lying and pretending that I don’t want you. That’s done with now Freya. That part of our lives is over. I want you not as just a friend. I want you in every single way. I want you in bed with me at night, and I want you on the end of my cock every spare moment we have. More than that I want to hold you, kiss you, love you.”

“I can’t do this.” The words bubbled from deep within, a combination of terror and panic. Freya tugged on her arms until Zak let her go.

“You’re going to run again?” he snapped. “You do that every time.”

“I do not.”

“You do,” he growled. “Every time things get uncomfortable, you just walk away. The parties I took you to, all of them, you stopped going the moment you felt out of your depth. The what’s-his-names? Not one of them lasted longer than a few months, and now this, us? You’re doing the exact same thing.”

Freya shook her head, desperately trying to deny Zak’s words, though she had no idea why. She didn’t even know what she was thinking! “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I know you’re scared. Sparks,” he groaned. “I am too. I’m terrified here. I’m putting it all on the line for you.”

“I’m beyond terrified,” she screeched, goaded into honesty. “What you’re taking about…I don’t fit into your world, Zak. I never will.” 

And there it was. The moment the words left her lips Freya realized exactly why she was, as Zak said, running scared. She wanted him. More than she had ever realized. It had taken the letter her to get her to see. A twist to make her realize that Zak was the man she had wanted all along. Only when she had heard about Club Smex, and imagined him being with other women, pleasuring them, wanting them, did she understand that she wanted him to be pleasuring
her.

Freya closed her eyes and remembered all the women that had passed through his life. How she had teased him about them, made a joke of it all, and deep down…

She snapped her eyes open and felt her heart sink all the way to her toes. Deep down, she had
always
wanted those women to be her. Why else the practical jokes against one another’s dates? Why else had she stopped going to his parties? Pushed him into a manageable Thursday night corner of her life? Somewhere she could have the bits of Zak she wanted without ever risking the rejection or the heartbreak.