Breaking Skin (26 page)

“When your mother and I were younger, our dance teacher, Miss Emily, gave us each a ribbon. She said she got them from Margot Fonteyn. Do you know who she is?”

Langley nods. “Mom told me the story. She was one of the greatest ballerinas of all time. Miss Emily got the ribbons when she traveled with her family to England to see
Giselle
. Margot Fonteyn gave a handful of her hair ribbons to all the children at the show, and Emily gave you and Mom one for luck when you dance.”

I smile down at her. “That’s right. And I need you to keep mine safe until I get back.”

Her eyes go wide and she hesitates, but I silently insist by keeping my hand out. After more silent debate, she finally takes the worn ribbon from my hand.

“You want me to know you’re coming back. That’s why you’re giving this to me?”

“Yes. That’s right.” I point to the ribbon. “This is my sacred promise to you.”

Leaning up on her elbow, she reaches over to the drawer of her nightstand, pulls it open, and carefully places the ribbon inside. “For safekeeping.”

I kiss her forehead. “Go to sleep. I love you.”

“Love you too.” She mumbles the words absently as she turns her head into her pillow.

My chest constricts. She’s never said those words to me. I say them to her each night, and this is the first time they’ve been returned.

I leave the room quickly before my tears fall and my breath hitches. Then I go downstairs and stand at the bottom of the staircase, overcome by my affection for that little girl up there. I never thought it was possible to feel this kind of love for anyone. It’s different from other kinds of love. It’s selfless and unconditional. I would do anything to make her happy and keep her safe.

It takes some time to pull myself together, but once I do, I let a waiting Siegfried out into the backyard. When he walks directly to the end of the patio, I see Cole standing there.

He grins, flashing his straight white teeth at me. His smile is contagious and I return it.

My body somehow both relaxes and goes on alert at the sight of him. My heart feels so full tonight, such a sharp contrast to how I usually feel. I thought I was content, even happy when I was alone in San Francisco, but I was only living half a life and thinking it was whole. I didn’t know the difference then, but I do now.

When Cole steps closer, my smile falls at the apprehension on his face. “Is everything okay?”

“I’m sorry I made you wait all day to hear this, but I wanted to tell you in person.”

“Did you find him?”

Cole moves closer and places his hands on my shoulders. “My agent, Howard, did. Alan Lamont lives in San Francisco in a rental in the Richmond District. Howard also found cell towers in San Francisco that picked up Renee’s phone signal.”

“Picked it up recently?”

He nods. “But we can’t pinpoint exactly where she is. There’s no one tower that picks up her signal consistently.”

I grin up at him. “But now we know she’s in the city and maybe she’s with this Alan guy?”

Cole doesn’t smile with me.

“What is it?”

“Alan Lamont has a criminal record. Nothing serious. He’s been arrested twice for drug possession and once for petty theft, but I don’t think you should talk to him. I’ll do it.”

A criminal record?
I shake my head. “Thank you, but she’s my sister. I should be the one to do it.”

He sets his jaw firmly. “No. I’ll drive up with you to San Francisco tomorrow, drop you off, and go find him. I’ll catch him first thing in the morning before he leaves his apartment. If we’re lucky, Renee will be there too. I already spoke to my sister. She’ll take the kids to school in the morning and pick them up in the afternoon. She’ll probably bring her crew over to my house too. Langley will have fun.”

My mouth drops open. “You already arranged all that?”

“I’m not trying to overstep here, but if this guy’s dangerous, I can’t let you talk to him.”

While I was waiting for his news about the address, he was busy organizing both our days and now he’s brought his sister into it too, all to help me. For a moment, I wonder if he’s real or a figment of my imagination because men like him don’t exist in real life. At least, I never believed they did.

“Do you really think he’s dangerous?” I ask. “You don’t think he’d hurt Renee, do you?”

“I’m only being cautious.”

As much as I appreciate Cole’s help and his protective streak, this is
my
family. “What if I went with you to see him?”

He shakes his head but I stop him when I place my hand on his arm. “I appreciate everything you’ve done, but she’s my sister, Cole. You can’t cut me out completely. I won’t be alone. I’ll be with you.”

He sighs and I can feel him wavering. After a moment he agrees, although his turned-down lips reveal his reluctance.

As the things he told me sink in, a knot forms in the pit of my stomach. “Imagine if I’ve been sitting here getting more and more angry at Renee while the whole time she was hurt and wanted to come back but couldn’t.”

His gaze softens. “I hate to say anything negative about your sister, but she left under her own steam, and she’s probably still gone because it’s her choice.”

I nod, but I’m not so sure he’s right. “We’ll leave early in the morning?”

“Around six.”

“Thank you again. I don’t mean to seem ungrateful. It’s just—”

He stops me with a kiss. “I already told you. I don’t want your appreciation and I’m not looking for you to be grateful, Nikki.”

“Can I be thankful?”

One side of his mouth lifts. “If it means you’ll stop arguing with me.”

He kisses my smiling lips and I feel no need to argue. Instead, I focus my attention on meeting every stroke of his tongue with one of my own. My hands inch up his chest and I feel his muscles contract beneath my touch.

Cole groans when my fingers thread through the hair at the nape of his neck. I push in closer, lifting up onto my toes. Everything I’m feeling tonight makes me needy for him. This need is physical, emotional, and raw. I know Cole understands when he bends forward, brings his hands around my thighs, and hoists my legs up over his hips.

With me wrapped around him, he lowers himself into one of the lounge chairs and lets my weight come down on him, aligning our bodies so I can feel his arousal.

“Cole.” I whisper his name and roll my hips.

One of his hands grips my waist while the other slips beneath my shirt and brushes over the cup of my bra. I breathe his name this time and roll my hips again. When his mouth opens with a soft groan, I push my tongue inside.

A door slams closed in the distance and we both freeze, our chests rising and falling like we just ran a marathon.

Siegfried gets to his feet and walks to the edge of the patio.

“Dad.” Derek’s voice carries to us across the night.

“Dammit,” Cole whispers as he presses his forehead to mine. It occurs to me that we were only minutes away from doing something we wouldn’t want the children or any of the neighbors to see.

Cole lifts me off him and sets me down on the lounger while he stands. “Hey, buddy. I’m over here. What are you doing up?” He says this quietly over the distance.

I run a hand through my hair, trying to tame it before I turn a smile in Derek’s direction.

“I couldn’t sleep.” Derek stands on the grass as his gaze shifts between us. Siegfried trots over to him, looking for attention.

“We were just finalizing our plans to go into the city tomorrow,” Cole says. “I told you Aunt Lily’s taking you to school in the morning.”

Derek’s eyes settle on me, and I can feel the heat crawling up my face.

“We’d better get you back to bed.” Cole places his hand on Derek’s shoulder and leads him away from the patio. Before he disappears from sight, he turns to look at me and winks.

I press my palms to my fiery cheeks and sit there until I hear the door of Cole’s house close behind them.

Later, as I’m making up the couch to go to sleep, Cole sends me a text.

Cole: Be ready by six in the morning. Sorry about earlier. Didn’t mean to maul you out in the open like that. Lost myself for a minute there. #notreallysorry

My skin warms again as I smile wistfully. He lost himself.
In me.
Those words turn me upside down and throw me completely off-kilter. They echo in my head and cause flashes of our one night together to click by in my head like an X-rated slide show.

As I lie down, the steady throbbing between my legs won’t go away. To fall asleep, I have to satisfy myself with his image in my head and his voice floating through my thoughts.

A
t the break of dawn, I walk with a sleepy Langley to Cole’s house.

“Derek’s aunt is going to take you to school and pick you up today,” I explain, hoping she’ll roll with the change of plan.

“Why?” She rubs the sleep from her eyes as we walk through the damp morning air.

“Mr. Dempsey needs to go to San Francisco too, so he’s going to drive me.”

“You’re going with Mr. Dempsey?” She squints up at me.

“This way you get to hang out with Derek
and
his cousins after school.”

She considers this and a smile spreads across her sleepy face.

Before we reach Cole’s house, I glance back at the woods and search for a lone figure among the trees. I don’t expect to see anyone, especially not at this early hour, and I don’t. It’s still and quiet.

When Lily greets us at the door with a smile for Langley and only a stiff nod for me, I’m surprised. She’s been nothing but friendly before, and I wonder if Cole exaggerated her willingness to watch the kids today.

“Thank you so much for doing this,” I say politely.

“I’m doing it for my brother,” she replies. Then she gives me a pointed look before she turns and walks out of the room.

I’m taken aback, confused and uneasy now.

Cole comes down the stairs and spots me standing there. “Ready to go?”

I hesitate. “Are you sure this is all right? I’d hate to put your sister out.”

“You’re not.” He eyes me more closely. “Everything okay?”

I wait until he’s closer to quietly say, “Lily doesn’t seem thrilled about doing this.”

He shakes his head, dismissing my concern. “Lily’s fine. Did you bring a copy of the house key so she can walk Siegfried?”

My fingers close around it in my pocket and I hand it to him.

Then I go into the other room where Derek and Langley are sitting at a big kitchen island. I hug Langley good-bye, relieved that the apprehension she exhibited last night is gone, and Cole gives Lily some last-minute instructions before he walks me out to the big SUV I saw Derek washing the day I first arrived. I hold the door to hoist myself up, and the next thing I know Cole’s hands are around my waist as he lifts me into the seat like I weigh nothing at all.

Once he’s behind the wheel, he says, “I need to stop for coffee on the way out of town. Want some?”

“Dying for some.”

With a grin, he starts the engine and we’re on our way.

“What did my sister say to you?” he asks.

“Nothing. She was fine.”

“Fine. Is that code for rude?”

With a laugh, I shrug. “Maybe she was a little.”

“She’s just looking out for me. Lily has appointed herself commander in chief of my well-being, even if it comes at the expense of my sanity.”

I grin. “I understand. She cares about you. She probably wants you to find a nice girl from a nice family who went to college and has a nice, normal job.”

He gives me an amused look. “Sounds pretty boring to me. Don’t worry about Lily, okay?”

“Okay.”

Cole pulls up to a drive-through place to get our coffees, and then it’s onto the freeway along with hundreds of other cars.

“Did Derek say anything after you left last night?” I ask.

He smirks. “He said, ‘Good going, Dad. She’s hot.’”

My jaw drops. “He did not.”

“Swear to God.”

“He’s only ten years old.”

“And he already has great taste.”

I snort and sink into my seat.

“Come on. It’s a compliment.”

I slide my gaze in his direction. “The thought of you with someone besides his mother doesn’t bother him?”

Cole glances at me briefly. “It probably would have in the beginning, but I think he accepts it now, especially with Celeste engaged to Luke.”

I look over at Cole and remember what I thought when I first saw him in that bar, that he’s larger than life. From the outside, you’d think he has it made. He’s a former pro hockey player and a celebrity. He’s easy on the eyes and exudes confidence when you meet him.

Anyone would assume he must live a playboy lifestyle, partying all the time with beautiful women surrounding him. But his life isn’t like that at all. It’s not charmed. He has his share of problems, maybe more than his share.