Breath of Scandal (21 page)

"Of course not. But maybe you want it so badly that you're seeing something that's not really there. Have you thought of that? At least give yourself time to get to know him better."

"No more time, Jade. It's long past time I did something for myself. I'm tired of paying for your mistakes. Because of you, I had to quit my job, sell my house, and completely relocate. "

"It wasn't my fault, " Jade protested in a hoarse, agonized voice.

"You got yourself raped, then insisted on keeping the baby when the best thing for everybody would have been to get rid of it. "

"It wouldn't have been best for me, Mama. I wanted Graham. I love him."

"Well, Harvey loves me," Velta insisted. "After all I've been through, he wants to show me a good time."

Jade felt a responsibility toward her mother. It was her duty as a daughter to interfere in order to prevent a disaster, even if it meant offending her. Better her mother's feelings were hurt than her life ruined.

"He's unworthy of you, Mama," Jade said. She gave Harvey's oily hair and shiny suit a contemptuous glance.

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"He preys upon people's emotions for profit. He barters in human life. Is that the kind of man you want to marry? Daddy was awarded the Medal of Honor. He was a hero. How can you even think of--

"Your hero father killed himself, Jade." "That's not true! "

Velta's eyes narrowed maliciously. "We were fine until you came along. Then, Ron couldn't stand living with us, so he blew his brains to smithereens. So you've got two suicides marked up to you, Jade. In fact, you've given me nothing but trouble since the day you were conceived. I'm not going to live the rest of my life in your wake of destruction." Pushing Jade aside, she opened the passenger door and got in.

Harvey closed it soundly behind her, then went around to the driver's side and slid behind the steering wheel. Velta kept her head averted as they backed up and pulled away.

"Mama, no!" Jade charged after the car, but it sped off. "Mama!" she screamed. She watched until they were out of sight, then stood staring after them until Graham's cries penetrated her stunned disbelief.

Mindlessly, she trudged back into the tacky cabin. Graharn was waving his chubby arms in a fit of pique. His mouth was wide open, showing his only two teeth. Jade cooed to him as she changed his diaper. Apparently, in her haste to pack and leave with Harvey, Velta hadn't bothered to change him the whole time Jade had been out.

She sat with her baby on the bed and rocked him while waiting for his bottle to warm. When it reached the desired temperature, she poked the nipple into his mouth. He attacked it eagerly. Because of his voracious appetite, she had weaned him from breast milk long before she was emotionally ready to stop nursing.

He clutched at her blouse, his stubby fingers digging into the material. As he sucked at the rubber nipple, she held him close so that she would get a sense of feeding him from her body.

It would forever remain a mystery to her how something so beautiful and sweet as he could have been spawned by

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something so ugly as the rape. She rarely associated Graham's conception with the incident, because to do so would force her to speculate on whose seed had taken root in her body. She never wanted to know.

Divorcing Graham's origin from the rape had occurred that afternoon at Georgie's house. She had told Jade that she prided herself not only on her precision with medical instruments but on her instincts about people. On that aftemoon, her instincts had prompted her to ask the young, frightened Jade if having her baby aborted was what she really wanted.

"You just don't seem the type o' girl what usually comes to me, Miss Sperry. That trashy Patrice Watley even said so. Are you sure you want to go through with this?"

And in that moment, Jade knew that she didn't. The fetus inside her, as if by a stroke of magic, had suddenly ceased to have any relevance to the rape. The child growing inside her was hers. She loved it instantly and completely.

The revelation delivered such an emotional impact that she had collapsed on Georgie's rubber-sheeted table. For half an hour she had sobbed uncontrollably, not from distress but from relief over being freed of the agonizing decision that had haunted her for weeks.

The outburst left her weak and tremulous. Eventually, she composed herself, tearfully thanked Georgie for her time, and left. Georgie had kept her fifty dollars, charging as much for talking an indecisive girl out of an abortion as she did to perform one.

"Ready to burp?" Jade tugged the nipple out of Graham's mouth. He put up a fuss, but it subsided when Jade patted his back until he belched expansively. "My goodness!" she exclaimed. "That was something!" He looked up at her and grinned. An infusion of love went through her body as potently as an intravenous narcotic. She ran her thumb across his lower lip, wiping off the marbleized mixture of milk and saliva. She sucked it off her thumb, then resettled him against her breast and gave him back his bottle.

Shaken and weak from expended emotion, she had left Georgie's house that day with renewed hope. If she ex-

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plained everything to Gary, as she should have done the night of the rape, he would understand. As kind and loving as he was, he would agree with her decision to keep the baby. They would leave Palmetto, marry, and pursue their shared dreams. Gary would rear her baby      as his own, and no one would ever know otherwise. With those plans set in her mind, she had sped toward Gary's house.

But that was where her memory always begged to take a detour. The road to Gary's farm always led straight to the barn and the grisly sight that had awaited her there.

"If only you had trusted in me a little while longer." She leaned over and whispered the words against Graham's velvety cheek. "Why'd you do it, Gary?" She knew why of course. His faith in her had been destroyed. Those who, had destroyed it were going about their lives unscathedbut not forever.

God had been merciful in one respect. Graham bore no resemblance to any of her three attackers. None of his features hinted at his paternity. He had dark, wavy hair, like hers. His eyes were going to remain blue and be tilted up slightly at the outer comers. The only face that emerged fiDm his Plump, baby prettiness was Ronald Sperry's, which was a masculine version of her own. It pleased her that he favored her father.

From the day it had happened, Jade had realized that the accidental ruling on her father's death was dubious. Nevertheless, hearing the truth from her mother had been a brutal blow. Velta had always vehementl denied that her husy

band's fatal, self-inflicted wound was intentional. For heir to admit that it was, and to suggest that Jade was responsible, demonstrated to Jade the depth of her mother's antipathy.

Had she been so desperately unhappy living with her daughter that she would resort to running off with a slimy character like Harvey? It seemed so. Jade longed for one cherished memory of her mother that she could cling to. Unlike the treasured memories of her father, there were none of her mother.

After Graham finished feeding, she didn't return him to his crib but continued to hold him against her, as she often

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did when she needed the comfort of human contact. Now that the shock of Velta's desertion had lost some of its sting, the ramifications of how it affected her and Graham were beginning to sink in.

All Jade had with her was a change of clothing and about thirty dollars. That was barely enough money to get them back to Savannah. Once there, how could she possibly handle the move to Morgantown alone?

" She nuzzled her "What are we going to do, Graham?                       3' to nose in his sweet-smelling neck. "What are we going do?"

The easiest option would be to return to Savannah and resume her job, promising herself that as soon as she had saved enough money she would continue her education.

But saving money would be doubly difficult now that she would have the additional expense of child care. One postponement would pile onto another; the dream of seeking retribution would move farther from her grasp-

No, she couldn,t let that happen.

There had to be a way. If a way wasn't provided9 she as would make one. She couldn't let this Opportunity P SShe had already sacrificed one scholarship and wasn't going to sacrifice another.

CHAPTER

Elem

The doorbell echoed through the interior of the house. It was a dignified home, built in the Georgian style. The red brick was trimmed in white and accented with glossy black shutters on all the windows. It was set well away from the street, on a lawn that was meticulously manicured - The grass

still glistened from its early morning watering by the automatic sprinkler system.

The obvious affluence made Jade feel self-conscious. She gave her skirt a critical glance, hoping the wrinkles didn't show too badly. She moistened her fingers with her tongue and wiped Graham's drooling mouth one final time, just as the front door was opened by a pretty, petite woman with ash-blond hair. Guessing, Jade placed her in her early fifties.

"Good morning." Her soft gray eyes were drawn immediately to Graham, then she graciously smiled at Jade. "May I help you?"

"Good morving. Are you Mrs. Hearon?" She nodded. "That's right."

"My name is Jade Sperry. I apologize for calling on you so early, but I wanted to catch Dean Hearon before he left for his office. " Taking Graham on campus with her had been Ia more discouraging prospect than bringing him to the dean s home. "Is he still here, by any chance?"

"He's having breakfast. Come in."

"I'd rather stay here on the porch," Jade said hesitantly. "What I have to see him about won't take long."

"Then there's no reason for you not to come in. Please. Is this your little boy? He's adorable."

Jade found herself being ushered through beautiful but homey rooms. They passed through a sunny kitchen where the tantalizing smell of bacon and eggs made her salivate. These days her diet consisted mainly of Rice Krispies and peanut-butter sandwiches. She didn't remember when she had last eaten a cooked mM.

They entered a glass-enclosed back porch that extended the width of the house. At a wrought-iron table with a glass top, Dean Heaton was finishing his breakfast. As on the day Jade had met him in his office, he was dressed in a brown suit and tie, but she could envision him wearing a sweater with suede elbow patches and baggy trousers with a shiny seat.

Grizzled hair encircled his balding head like a laurel wreath. Tufts of hair sprouted from his ears. He also had more than adequate nostril hair. Rather than repulsing, how-

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ever, his hirsute features were endearing. His face was pleasant, his eyes friendly, his smile sweet. He glanced up curiously when his wife escorted Jade in. He removed the linen napkin he had tucked into his shirt collar and stood up.

"Well, Miss Sperry, isn't it? This is a pleasant surprise." "Thank you." She shifted Graham to her left arm and extended her right hand. After they shook hands, he motioned her into the chair across the table from him and invited her to sit down.

Jade felt flustered and gauche. The shoulder strap of her handbag was about to slide off her arm, and Graham was squirming and reaching for the drooping frond of a Boston fern hanging overhead.

"No, thank you, Dr. Hearon. I really can't stay. I apologize for interrupting your breakfast, but as I told Mrs. Hearon, I needed to see you before you left for campus."

"I've got time for one more cup of coffee. I'd love to have you join me. Cathy, please ... Miss Sperry?" Again he gestured toward the chair. Jade dropped into it, not wanting to appear rude, but mainly because balancing Graham and holding on to her slipping handbag was a feat that would have challenged an expert juggler.

"Thank you. I'm sorry for dropping in like this. I should have called- No, Graham!" In the nick of time, she prevented her son from eating the leaves he had pulled off the fem. "I'm sorry. I hope he didn't damage the plant."

"That's the third time you've apologized since you came into the room, Miss Sperry. Such an overdose of contrition is making me nervous."

"Me too," Cathy Hearon said as she reentered, bearing a small tray. On it were a cup and saucer and a plate. On the plate were a wedge of honeydew melon wrapped in a paper-thin slice of prosciutto and a blueberry muffin.

"Oh, I didn't mean for you to-" "Would you prefer tea over coffee?"

Jade didn't want to offend them by declining their hospitality. Besides, her stomach was growling. "Tea, please," she said quietly. "If it's not too much trouble."

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"None at all. I've already got it brewed."

Cathy Hearon went for the tea. Jade smiled sickly at the Dean of Student Affairs. "Thank you for your hospitality. "You're welcome. Butter?"

He passed her a Waterford crystal butter dish. As she smoothed butter onto the warm muffin, she handed Graham the teething ring she carried everywhere they went. For the time being, he seemed content to gnaw on it while she ate breakfast.

Mrs. Hearon poured her a cup of fragrant jasmine tea, then resumed her seat at the table.

"What's the baby's name?" "Graham. "

"Graham. I like that. Very unusual, isn't it, dear?" "Uh-huh. Miss Sperry is the young woman from Palmetto whom I was telling you about."

"Oh, yes. You see, Miss Sperry, Mitch has distant relatives in Palmetto."

Jade swung her startled gaze to the dean. He hadn't said anything about Palmetto at their previous appointment. She didn't want them to ask, "Do you know - - . " The less said about Palmetto, the better, because she didn't want to lie to them about anything.

Thankfully, Graham provided a distraction. He banged his teething ring on the edge of the table, then threw it to the floor in favor of a shiny silver spoon. She picked up the teething ring, but he found the spoon tastier.