Breathing For The First Time (7 page)

Brooke looks to the tent in my boxers and raises an eyebrow at me. I tell her, “You have that effect on me. Even in my dreams.”

I reach up to her, but the room spins when I try to sit up. How am I so drunk in my dream? This sucks. But Brooke is here and that’s all that matters. She’s mine in my dreams, and no one can take that away.

She leans forward and kisses me. It feels familiar, but strange in some way. I guess because it’s not real. I push away my thoughts, wanting to be with her, even if it’s only a dream. I’ll take her any way I can get her.

Brooke climbs on top of me, straddling me between her legs. My fingers move to the edge of her dress and slide under to brush against her bare skin. I pull the dress up so I can touch more of her, and admire her. She helps me, pulling the dress over her head.

Her soft white breasts glow in the moonlight streaming in through the porthole, standing out against her tanned skin. She presses down on top of me, her mouth meeting mine and her breasts smashed against me. My erection brushes the inside of her thighs. She gasps and sits up.

She stands again, and removes her panties, guiding my hand between her legs. I’m drunk, but I can feel her wetness, her desire for me. I pull her closer and slide my fingers inside her, getting harder with the feel of her body around my fingers. I circle her nub with my thumb and pulse my fingers inside her until she moans and releases a crashing orgasm.

She climbs back on top of me, pulling my erection through the hole in my boxers. She settles me inside of her, sitting up so I fill her body. She moves her hips against me, lifting herself off me and slamming back down hard. She twists my nipples as I plunge into her.

My drunken dream state doesn’t let me last long and it’s over too soon. I would give anything to do that again, but I tell myself I’ll have another chance. I’ll dream her again.

Brooke collapses on my chest, breathing hard against me. My erection shrinks and pulls out of her before she rolls to my side. She nuzzles under my arm, settling her head on my chest.

I wrap my arm around her, and tell her, “Thank you. I’ve been hoping for that. This is the best dream I’ve ever had. I love you, Brooke.”

“What?” she asks me, but I’m already passed out.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Brooke

I’m completely in love with Grand Cayman. I don’t think I’ve seen a place more beautiful. Tiffany booked us on a shore excursion to swim with stingrays. It was the most amazing thing I’ve ever done.

When our boat pulled up to the sandbar, I didn’t understand why the sand was black. Then I noticed it was also moving and it wasn’t sand, but the stingrays swarming the water. Talk about stunning. And terrifying.

We had a brief safety explanation then descended the ladder from the back of the boat onto the sand. At my height, the water was a little above my waist, something that surprised me since we were a mile or so off shore.

Tiffany was the fearless one. She jumped right in there, picking the stingrays up and even feeding them. Paige wasn’t far behind her, quickly getting comfortable in the water with these beautiful creatures. I was terrified.

One of the guides noticed I wasn’t interacting much and came to my side. He explained that the stingrays are used to people here, and that they naturally aren’t aggressive animals. One of the rays swam toward him and he easily lifted it from the water, the span of its fins reaching beyond the guide’s hands.

His eyes met mine and he moved toward me, slowly handing the stingray off to my arms. As I stood there, holding this fascinating animal, I was surprised by how light it was for such a large creature. It tried sucking my neck, looking for food, but the guide delicately lowered it back to the water. He handed me a fistful of food then easily caught another stingray and showed me how to feed it.

The subtle sucking of the stingray was gentle but effective. And I was hooked. I found Paige and Tiffany, both happily catching and feeding the five and six foot long fish. It gave me strength to see this, to do something I know I will never do again.

The boost of confidence that experience gave me is leading me today. We’re back at sea for the day, our last full day on the ship. And today I’m going to find Tyler.

Paige and Tiffany helped me last night. We talked through everything that has happened with Tyler and we all agreed he is being honest with me, and I should give him another chance. Relief washed over me when my friends agreed with me. I worried I was letting myself believe him because I wanted to and not because he’s the man I’ve come to know. I think Paige and Tiffany see that he’s a good guy, and they want to believe him.

I really hope we can spend our last day together. I look for him at breakfast and at the pool, but don’t see him. He could be in the gym or even still sleeping. I’m not sure what room he’s in so I keep my eyes open, hoping to see him.

Paige, Tiffany, and I go to the buffet for a late lunch. We slept in this morning, always our preference, but it seems everyone else did too. When we walk into the buffet area, I spot Tyler. My friends give me a nod and I go to Tyler where he’s piling his plate full of food.

I walk up behind him and tap him on the shoulder. He turns to face me and I notice he looks like shit. His face lights up when he sees me, but he’s definitely not feeling well. My concern shows on my face when I ask if he’s okay.

“Yeah,” he groans. “I had a lot to drink last night and I’m a little sick.”

“Oh, okay, I’ll leave you alone then.” I turn to walk away, figuring he doesn’t want to talk when he’s hungover.

Before I can take a step, Tyler grabs my arm and spins me around. “No,” he tells me, “you make me feel better about everything. Is there something you wanted to say?”

His eyes give away his hope, expectation all over his face. I smile at his openness and tell him I’ve done a lot of thinking.

“I believe you. I know you were telling me the truth about Rachel, and I believe you. I trust you.”

Tyler beams at me. He whoops then scoops me up in his arms and spins me around. He sets me down and stumbles, no doubt dizzy from the alcohol and the spin. I reach out for his arm to steady him and he thanks me. “Will you have lunch with me?”

I look toward Paige and Tiffany, “Well, I’m having lunch with my friends, but maybe you could join us? They’d love to meet you.”

Tyler agrees and follows me to our table near the windows overlooking the ocean. I introduce Tyler and go back to the buffet for my own lunch. When I return to the table, Paige and Tiffany are laughing at something Tyler said. I smile watching my best friends getting along with my... boyfriend? Do I dare think that?

I take the seat between Tyler and Tiffany and join the conversation. Tyler says, “Oh, did she tell you about when she lost it before our Principles of Psych mid-term last semester? It was right after you and Dante visited, Paige. She was sad because you just left and flipped out because she didn’t study enough. I studied the whole weekend y’all were in town since I didn’t have Brooke to hang out with. In class Monday she told me she was going to fail since she hadn’t studied so I told her I would help. I worked four days, then another two night with her, and she still got a better grade than me! I wish I had half her brains.”

Paige and Tiffany laugh with Tyler. He looks at me appreciatively, and I glow under his gaze. I remember that week. It meant so much that he was willing to help me out.

“Be glad she did well, Tyler. She’s even worse when she gets a bad grade!” Paige begins. I drop my head to the table, knowing what’s coming. I peek out through my fingers at Tyler who is watching the whole scene unfold with a smile on his face.

“Yeah, don’t ever get between Brooke and her grades,” Tiffany tells him. “Our junior year Paige and I finished exams before Brooke.”

“And we were ready to have fun!” Paige jumps in.

“We knew Brooke needed to study so we called our friends to go out and leave Brooke alone.”

“Ten minutes before we left, Brooke came out of her room looking hot and ready to party. We told her to stay home and study, but she insisted she needed a break and was done studying.”

Tiffany continues, “So she went out with us and matched us drink for drink. In the morning, Paige and I could barely get out of bed and Brooke was just as bad. She finally got up and went to her exam, but she tanked it. It was her worst grade and she flipped out. She didn’t talk to us for two days, saying it was our fault.”

“When her final grade was posted, she still pulled off a B in the class so she apologized, but we made sure not to do that again!”

Tyler looks at me with a ‘shame on you’ expression. I hide behind my hands while Paige and Tiffany roar with laughter. Tyler cracks up and I admit I was crazy.

This feels right.

After lunch Tyler and I walk the ship, holding hands. It’s good to have him back in my life. Being apart for a week was almost more than I could stand. He seems to feel the same way since he doesn’t let me go the rest of the day.

Being our last night on the ship, I tell him I want to share one last dinner with our companions and he reluctantly agrees. We make plans to meet up afterward to go dancing.

I drop into my seat at dinner and say hello to Peggy, Diane, and Terri. The ladies exchange a smirk and Peggy says, “Who was the cutie we saw you with earlier? You two walked right past us, holding hands. Terri here got mad that you didn’t say hello, but I told her you didn’t even know you were on a cruise ship. All you were thinking about is what you could do with that young man.”

My cheeks flame up, busted. “Peggy! I can’t believe you would say that!” But we all know she’s right.

I quickly tell them about Tyler and our very new relationship. “So why haven’t you been with him all week?” Diane asks.

I cringe, hoping this wouldn’t have come up. “I didn’t know he was going to be here. He’s here with some old friends, including his ex-girlfriend.”

They exchange a worried look and Terri asks, “And you’re okay with that?”

I laugh, knowing the hell I’ve been through this week. “Not really. But I trust him. He said nothing is going on with her and that he didn’t tell me because he knew how it would seem. Of course catching him was worse, but I know he’s a good person.”

“Well,” begins Peggy, “I think you two look beautiful together. I saw the sparkle in your eye, and it was clear he only has eyes for you. You make each other very happy.”

I thank her and tell her we do, at least so far.

Our conversation shifts to going home tomorrow, and I admit I’m looking forward to it now more than I have all week. I glance across the room to where Tyler’s table is and I see him looking at me. He winks at me and I smile, knowing I made the right choice.

We all walk out of the dining room together, trading hugs with Peggy, Diane, and Terri. We exchanged e-mail addresses and promised to look each other up on Facebook. The are definitely women I want to learn from and maybe even see again one day.

Peggy notices Tyler waiting for me as we say our goodbye. They tease me, saying, “I know what I’d do with him if I were your age!” I laugh at my new friends then join Tyler.

Once I get close to him he pulls me close and leans in for a kiss. It’s sweet and gentle, but I can feel his passion hiding just beneath the surface. I bring my arms up around his neck and part my lips slightly.

He accepts my invitation and his tongue dives between my teeth, exploring my mouth, tasting me. I let go of any apprehension I had the day before and pull him tighter to me, letting my desire for him show through.

Tyler’s hand dips to the small of my back, holding me tight against him. His other hand cups my cheeks, his thumb caressing next to my ear. He pulls back from me, keeping my lower lip between his teeth. I gasp and pull him close to me again, desperate to kiss him. My hands drop to his chest and trace the lines of his strong muscles beneath his shirt. He presses against me and I can feel his appreciation for me beneath his shorts.

He breaks our kiss, and presses his forehead to mine. His eyes are dark with desire, and his voice is husky with need, “Come on, let’s go dancing.”

He guides me away from the dining room, his hand resting on my lower back. We go straight to the the dance floor, ready to be in each other’s arms. The music pulses through me and Tyler’s arms wrap around me, pressing my body close to his.

He moves in time with the music, taking me with him into the depths of the sound. All I can hear is the music and all I can feel is Tyler. His breath becomes mine, his body becomes mine, and his mouth becomes mine. I forget where we are and let my hands roam his body, tracing patterns on his back, caressing muscles on his chest, and pulling his hair.

His hands cover my body, caressing the bare skin on my back and arms, leaving goosebumps and fire in his path. We kiss for hours, not wanting to stop, not able to breathe unless it comes from the other.

I’m lost and found at the same time. Being with Tyler is like being home. The music slows and our bodies respond. Tyler grips my right hand in his left, his right hand possessively tight around my back. I lean in close to Tyler and rest my cheek on his shirt. I turn my face up toward him and breathe into his neck, inhaling the scent of his sweat blended with his deodorant.

He looks down at me and sings along with the music playing, a song I don’t recognize. His voice is soft and passionate, his eyes burning through my soul. I smile and listen to him singing, a talent I never realized he possessed.

As the song ends his lips meet mine in a sweet kiss. He drops my hand and settles his free hand on my neck. His thumb dances on my throat, tantalizing me with his tender touch. A moan escapes my throat and Tyler’s kiss turns from sweet to hot instantly. He guides me to the edge of the dance floor and toward a table in the corner of the room, cloaked in darkness.

“It’s killing me that there isn’t anywhere we can go to be alone. I want to show you how much I missed you.”

I glance toward the peak in his shorts, “I’m pretty sure I know how much you missed me. I missed you, too.”