Bringing Him Home (16 page)

The speculation on Mick's face was obvious; so too was the unqualified livid expression on Jared's.

Well fuck that.

"Well, nice to see you again." Mick turned to Jared and nodded. "You let me know if you need them cows seen to anytime soon," he said before ambling to his four-wheel drive.

Kyle watched him go, the vehicle bellowing a plume of white smoke as it bounced down the driveway. Jared faced him, the glint in his eyes dark and dangerous. "
You don't know
? What the fuck do you mean,
you don't know
?"

Jared was furious and Kyle knew he shouldn't provoke him, but he didn't feel like backing down, not right then, not over this. "If you'd backed me up instead of trying to avoid the issue, I would have known what to say. How the hell am I supposed to deal with something like that on my own?"

"If you hadn't stormed off, we might have been able to deal with it together. Or is that always going to be your reaction when you don't like something: you walk away?"

Gritting his teeth, Kyle stared into Jared's deep and damning gaze and felt a flare of matching anger. "Don't you dare fucking put this on me. You freaked out when you saw Mick's car. He didn't even have to know we were a couple, but you couldn't get over the fact that he might find out. If you don't want people to know about us, Jared, what the fuck am I here for?"

The intense blaze in Jared's eyes stunned Kyle to the core. His anger suddenly drained away as he witnessed that same hot blast he'd felt earlier, the one that had him feeling like he'd been pulled apart and roughly put back together.

Then Jared took a step back, the heat replaced by hurt. "You haven't figured that out yet?"

It took Kyle far too long to understand what Jared meant, and when he did, it was too late for him to respond; Jared had stalked off.

Kyle didn't think he could feel any worse or any more like an idiot, but he just hadn't expected Jared to feel that way, not yet, not when there were so many issues they had to sort out. Tightness spread quickly over Kyle's chest, uncomfortable, confining, unsettling, making him suddenly unsure and insecure. Seeing Mick had not been the easy experience Kyle thought it would be. Part of it was because it
was
Mick, but Kyle wasn't stupid enough to think that was the only reason. There would be people in this town who had been friends of his parents, and though Kyle didn't give a damn who knew he was gay, for the first time he worried about what they would think when they found out his parents were so ashamed of him they had lied about where he'd been.

And of course there would be the controversy of why he hadn't been at their funeral. His name would be mud, and that wasn't something Kyle thought he could stand. Stupid, really, when he didn't normally care what people thought of him. But he shouldn't have to put up with pointed fingers, whispered words, and angry glares, and it wasn't fair to make Jared endure it either. Jared didn't deserve having someone like him ruining his life, but Kyle didn't think he could give up trying to make a go of living here, not yet.

Turning in time to see Jared enter the house, Kyle sighed. He had a lot to think about, a lot to decide, and now even more to make up for.

Gripping the handles of his crutches, Kyle started toward the house. Maybe Jared had been right about being cautious. They didn't need to announce what they were to each other; it was enough they were together, and if people found out, then so be it, but there was no need to cause any aggravation by trying to force the issue. That was the last thing Kyle wanted to do, especially to Jared.

He'd just reached the front door when it was yanked open.

"What the fuck!"

Startled, Kyle took a half-staggered step back. Jared caught him, but his attention was on something else, not on Kyle.

"What?" he asked, twisting to face the direction Jared was glaring.

"Sally." Grim-faced, Jared stared down the driveway where another cloud of dust was heading toward them.

"Your sister?"

"Yes. Goddamn it, I told her to give us a few days."

"You told her about me?"

Lips compressed, Jared didn't answer, his eyes inscrutable. Deciding it might be better if he was to disappear, he edged toward the house, but Jared's tight grip stopped him. "Don't bother; she's here to see you."

Suddenly nervous, Kyle had no choice but to wait as a dark blue utility truck roared closer. The woman didn't actually drive the truck as much as bully it. It came to a skidding stop, and the driver opened the door before the dust had settled. The person who climbed out was surprising even though Kyle had no preconceptions about Jared's sister. Petite, dynamic, and ignoring her brother completely, she launched herself at Kyle and gave him a resounding kiss on the cheek.

"You must be Kyle," she enthused.

Kyle glanced at Jared, who bit his lip. "Um, yes."

"Wow, you
are
beautiful."

"Sally," Jared growled in warning. The grip on Kyle's arm tightened, and Kyle wondered how much Jared had told his sister and
what
he'd told her.

Kyle stared into almost gray eyes that shone with bright intelligence and sharp humor, and quickly relaxed. Despite Jared's assurance that Sally was here to see him, Kyle suspected she was also here to needle her brother.

"Thank you," he said, accepting Sally's compliment and wondering if Jared really did think him beautiful.

Sally grinned, then bounded back to her truck, pulling open the passenger door. "Meet my daughter," she said, holding out her hand to help down a young girl who was a smaller version of her mother in every way.

"Uncle Jared!" With long hair flowing, the little girl came running over to Jared and jumped into his arms. "Did you bring me back a present?" she asked hopefully.

Jared frowned. "Chloe, I was only gone for a week."

"But it was a long week."

Kyle watched her try for a pout and saw the way Jared was affected by it. Surprised when the man dug in his pocket and handed over ten dollars, Kyle wondered if he could learn to perfect a look that would get what he wanted from Jared. He quickly turned his face, hiding a smile he didn't think Jared would appreciate.

"You give in to her too much," Sally admonished.

"She's just pushy, like you. Didn't I ask you to give us a couple of days?"

"Kyle looks like he's recovering. What
did
happen to you?" she asked, turning her attention back to him.

"Broken ankle," Kyle answered, giving her the abbreviated version.

"Which was bad enough that Jared asked you to come home with him." It was a statement, not a question.

"He was kind enough to invite me," Kyle answered ambiguously.

"And are you staying?"

Instinctively Kyle glanced at the dark-haired man at his side, who stared back at him, his expression inscrutable, his eyes guarded. If he didn't answer this the right way, all hell could break loose, but with the way Jared was looking at him, Kyle didn't feel like answering at all. They both needed to apologize to each other, both needed to discuss the problems they were going to face, but this wasn't the time to do it. Frustrated, Kyle didn't know what to say, but was saved from saying anything when Jared abruptly turned and headed into the house.

"What's up with him?" Sally asked, staring after her brother. "You two have a lover's tiff or something?"

"Or something," Kyle told her, not sure how safe it was to confide in her.

Sally rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Stubborn idiot." Then she smiled, a sweet and disarming smile that had Kyle reasonably worried. "So you're the man who managed to capture my brother's heart."

Chapter Nine

Jared watched his sister go with a mixture of relief and disappointment. She'd pretty much grilled Kyle until the man was hoarse, but Kyle had managed to avoid answering any of the questions Jared had been interested in. Frustratingly, Jared was no closer to knowing what Kyle's intentions were, and now he had to face Kyle with the last thing he'd said still hanging between them.

He turned to look at Kyle, surprised when he smiled. "Are you all right?" he asked.

"She's pretty full on, isn't she?"

"She's a menace," Jared grumbled.

"But you love her."

Jared stiffened. So it was obvious to Kyle how he felt about his sister and niece, but it wasn't so obvious how he felt about him? Disheartened, Jared tried for nonchalance. "She's still a menace."

Kyle's blue eyes regarded him solemnly. "Do you want to come for a walk with me?"

"A walk?"

"Yeah, I want to show you something." It was the way Kyle looked at him that had Jared interested. It was a mixture of caution and expectation, as if Jared's decision to go with him was the be-all and end-all.

"Where?"

Kyle's eyes lit up, and he smiled again. "Come on." Kyle stood a little awkwardly but determinedly and led them out the back door.

"Where are we going?" Jared asked again as Kyle started toward the field on the left.

Kyle glanced at him, his expression almost mischievous. "Trust me, you'll like it."

The slight incline brought them to the top of a low rise, which in turn led them higher onto a craggy hilltop. Several Mugga Ironbark gum trees spread their deciduous branches over the short grass where Kyle paused.

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

Jared looked around him. The land
was
beautiful--it was one of the reasons he'd bought it, that and the potential to expand to the five hundred acres next door, but he couldn't see why Kyle had brought him to this particular spot any more than any other.

"Why here?"

"You'll see in a minute." Kyle sat down and patted the spot next to him. "Come and sit with me."

Jared did as he was told, intrigued. Kyle leaned against the trunk of the tree, and as Jared sat close to him, Kyle reached out and laid a hand on his thigh, squeezing gently.

Heat from both the physical closeness and the knowledge that Kyle still wanted to touch him flared along Jared's thigh and into his groin. Hiding the resulting bulge was pointless. Kyle knew what being close to him did, and Jared wondered if that had been Kyle's intention. Bright blue eyes locked on his, a smile within their depths along with a flash of purpose.

"Look, over there," he said, pointing to the west. Jared followed Kyle's directions, though he didn't see anything different from what he'd always seen: a thin line of lemon-scented gum trees, their white trunks standing along the horizon like sentinels.

"I don't see anything."

"Watch." Kyle angled his body a little so he was within the circle of Jared's arms. Deciding to take advantage, Jared pulled Kyle into the vee of his parted thighs, hugging Kyle to his chest. Warm hands linked with his, and with a small sigh, Kyle rested against him. Jared waited, his attention more on the man in his arms than his surroundings, but after a minute, he noticed the setting sun begin to spread long orange fingers across the sky. The clouds, which had been flitting along on the gentle breeze, seemed to be suddenly bathed in gold, while the trees, standing statue still, began to glow flame red.

As the minutes slowly passed, the sun changed to a deep magenta that darkened into a rolling burgundy, the concentrated hue causing the trees to flicker and twist as if they were on fire. Soon the visage receded and then was gone as the red orb of the sun disappeared beyond the ragged backdrop of the mountains.

"Beautiful, wasn't it," Kyle said, the deep rumble of his voice vibrating against Jared's palm where it rested on his chest. Jared nodded, bringing his lips close to the shell of Kyle's ear.

"I used to come here as a kid and play at being a pirate. I'd climb up those trees, and when the sun hit them like that, I'd pretend my ship was on fire and I'd have to bail out, throwing my treasure overboard."

"What was your treasure?" Jared asked, delighted and surprised at the memory Kyle wanted to share with him.

"Anything sparkly I could get my hands on. One time I took my mom's gold earrings. Took me days to find them afterward."

"Was she mad at you?"

Kyle shook his head, the softness of his hair caressing the side of Jared's cheek. "No, I managed to put them back before she found out, but I was shit scared the whole time. My dad had given them to her for her birthday."

"So you were an adventurous rebel." Supple fingers stroked lazily across the back of Jared's hand, sending tingles to race over his skin. He couldn't suppress a shiver of awareness, and though Kyle paused for a moment, he didn't stop.

"I'd forgotten how peaceful it is out here. After the noises of the city, this is like heaven."

"Really?" Whether Kyle heard the hope in his voice or whether he already knew what was going through Jared's mind, Kyle turned slightly to look him in the eyes.

"I used to love it here, and I never wanted to leave," he said. "It was my parents who made me, forced me." There was pain deep in the dark blue depths that regarded him fervently--pain and past humiliation.

"They're not here anymore, Kyle."

A grim line thinned Kyle's lips before he turned back to stare at the wilderness. "I know that. Doesn't make it any easier, though. God, Jared, I knew this was going to be hard, but does it have to be so hard?"

Jared didn't know what to say in response; this wasn't easy for either of them. The silence that grew became thick with tension. Jared gently spread his hands over Kyle's chest and was able to detect the hard thump of Kyle's heart. It sped up as Jared stroked over the smooth muscle, but Jared didn't know if it was from increased physical awareness or internal agitation. He tightened his hold, cradling Kyle against him, terrified that Kyle didn't want to be with him anymore, whereas he wanted Kyle so much it hurt.

"My father beat the crap out of me. Put me in hospital for two weeks." Jared wasn't sure why he'd blurted out that particular painful memory. Maybe it was to make Kyle realize he wasn't the only one who had been rejected by a parent, or maybe he just needed to get it off his chest.

Kyle twisted in his arms to look at him again. "He hit you?" The stunned question made Jared rethink his statement. Maybe he shouldn't have said anything.

"Jared?"

Jared shrugged as if it was nothing, and then realized Kyle wouldn't let him shrug it off, not now. "He broke three of my ribs, my forearm, and I pissed blood for a week." Said analytically it didn't sound so bad, but he remembered too well the excruciating pain he'd been in.

Under the darkening sky, Kyle's face had gone pale. "What did you do?" he whispered.

"To get beaten? He caught me jacking off to a magazine--a gay magazine."
That
memory Jared had to smile at. He'd been right on the edge and couldn't stop. His father's face had been comical until he'd seen the pictures Jared had been wanking over.

"And afterward?"

Jared kept his gaze steady on Kyle's. "My mom kicked him out, and I never saw him again. Both she and my sister helped me get over what he'd done."

The blue eyes that regarded him were dark with anger. "He was one sick bastard."

"Yeah." But Jared didn't feel any better for admitting it, probably no better than Kyle felt when talking about his parents and what they had done to him. "But it doesn't matter now."

"It does matter, Jared. It matters to me. God, and I thought I had bad memories. Shit, I'm sorry."

Jared smiled and bent down to brush his lips over Kyle's. They were warm and moist and incredibly sweet. "What did Mick mean when he said he thought it odd what your parents did to the house? What did they do?"

The body in his arms stiffened momentarily; then Kyle sighed and rested his head in the crook of Jared's neck. "They left it to a charity."

"You're kidding!"

"No. Didn't want me to get it, which was kind of funny considering I'd just paid off their mortgage and outstanding taxes a month before they died."

"Kyle!"

"Doesn't matter," he said in the same tone Jared had said it, as if saying it could make it true.

"I didn't know. I swear. When I bought the house a year ago, the owner's name was listed under an organization." Fuck, and he wanted Kyle to live there? Fleeting thoughts of bulldozing it and building from scratch entered Jared's head, but as if sensing his intent, Kyle shook his head.

"That would have been the charity they'd left it to. But the house is not the problem. I like what you've done with it."

"Then what is the problem?"

"There isn't one, not really, but I've been selfish and stupid and I want you to forgive me."

"For what?"

"You were right to want to be discreet. Mick didn't have to know. No one needs to know."

"That's not what I said."

"But it's what you wanted, and I kind of have to agree."

Well, this was a turn for the unexpected. "Why?"

Kyle turned so he could look at Jared. "Because I don't want you to feel you made a mistake asking me here."

"I don't, and I'm sorry for what I said to you earlier. I didn't mean it."

Kyle shrugged. "It's okay; this is difficult for both of us."

"Yeah, but I didn't need to make it more so."

"So how do we work it out?"

"We take it one step at a time, like you said."

There was conflict in Kyle's gaze, and Jared had to wonder why. Jared had never felt more confused or left feeling like he was adrift on a sea of uncertainty. What did Kyle want? What did he feel? And was there any chance of them sorting this out before the tension got too tight and they both snapped?

There were times when Jared wished he could be more forthright, more demanding, but he wouldn't push Kyle, wouldn't ask something of him he wasn't prepared to give. Kyle had to make his own choices, but Jared wondered if there was a way of nudging him to make the right one. Wasn't that what he'd been doing for the past few days anyway?

Kyle couldn't believe he was doing this. He couldn't believe Jared had suggested it, either. Wasn't this against everything they'd just agreed on?

"Are you sure?" Kyle prompted, checking out the window as Jared drove them to the edge of town where the small, rustic bar they were headed toward was located.

"We're hungry, and there's nothing in the fridge."

"We could have ordered in."

Jared glanced at him. "Have you changed your mind?"

"No, but what if someone recognizes me and starts to ask questions?"

"That's what you've been worried about, haven't you? Someone recognizing you?"

Kyle couldn't deny it. Since this afternoon it was all he'd thought about, that and Jared's half declaration of love. He didn't think he'd got it wrong, but Jared hadn't made mention of it again and Kyle was afraid to say something in case Jared denied it or worse, retracted it.

He nodded, answering Jared's question. "I hadn't thought about it, about the consequences."

"You mean what they might think about your parents lying about you."

Said so openly it was worse than Kyle had contemplated. He winced, which Jared noticed. "We can turn around if you want, but we're going to have to face it one day."

"Since when did you become so pushy?"

Jared glanced at him again, his gold-flecked eyes shining. "Since I decided I don't want to lose you."

Kyle smiled despite his misgivings. "I don't want to lose you, either."

As Jared pulled into the graveled parking lot, Kyle felt his apprehension grow. The parking area seemed quite full, and Kyle wondered what type of people came to a pub late on a Tuesday night. When they got inside, he found out.

Young teenagers and groups in their early twenties filled the place to capacity. The bar itself was small, running along one wall with a modest return for the waitress, who looked as young as the patrons she was serving. People lined the other three walls, most of which sported old farming equipment and memorabilia of a bygone era. Overall the room looked like it would be more suited to the elderly and genteel, not the loud, raucous crowd inhabiting the crammed space.

Jared stopped at the door, surprised.

"Been a while since you've been here, has it?" Kyle asked with sudden amusement. He didn't think this was Jared's usual haunt and guessed he'd picked it because he thought it would be less populated, or at least wouldn't be patronized by people they didn't want to bump into. Looking around, Kyle doubted Jared knew anybody in here. Kyle knew damn well
he
didn't.

Passing Jared, Kyle made his way to the bar, and squeezing in between a young couple and two girls who quickly checked him out, he managed to snag the attention of the bartender and ordered two beers. He turned his back to the bar and watched as Jared joined him, a bemused expression on his face.