Broken Halo (16 page)

      
Nimbus
wasn't a demon. He was her angel. That was the truth she chose to believe. Her
breathtaking reality, because if he wasn't the creature she needed him to be
then she was damned from heaven and in grave danger in his presence. If her
perfect fantasy of him wasn't real, she would be forever haunted no matter
where she ran, or to whom she turned.

***

      
Sonya
lay alone in the pasture grazing and sunning herself when a vibrant light
flashed to the side of her. She turned with a shrill scream to see Cassiel
standing there and tried to use her long, black hair to cover her frontal
nudity from him. He graciously averted his eyes and presented her with a robe
to cloak her body in. She donned it quickly, astounded that she stood in the
presence of an archangel and it was with great remorse that she recalled that
she too was an angel. “Cassiel, what are you doing here?”

      
“I
was going to ask you the same question,” he returned, facing her once she gave
him permission to look.

      
Her
cheeks felt warm from his reproof and the fact that she wasn't wearing anything
when he appeared to her. She hadn't questioned her nudity before he arrived.
She was a pony after all, grazing in the green pastures her master offered to
her, but once Cassiel appeared, she realized that she was naked and she felt
humiliated and ashamed of her scandalous conduct.

      
“I
was enjoying the sunshine,” she said with a nonchalance she didn't feel.

      
“Is
this what he has turned you into? A senseless beast of burden who wanders
around naked and eats grass like a horse?”

      
Her
head bowed at his derision. “You wouldn't understand.”

      
“No,
I don't, but I don't think you truly do either. Are you aware of the monster
the one you call master is? He is a demon, Sonya, and you are an angel. Have
you forgotten that?”

      
“I
know,” she said quietly, unable to look at him.

      
“Why,
Sonya?” There was so much anguish in his voice it made her heart spasm with
pain, “Why did you turn your back on a loving God to serve the enemy? Why did
you throw away the glory of heaven for this?”

      
Why
had she? It sounded incredibly foolish when he phrased it like that. Her tone
cracked as she spoke, revealing her lamentation over the height from which she
had fallen. “I don't know.”

      
Sonya
felt torn and confused, but she shouldn't be. She should know damned well what
to do and then do it, not weigh the pros and cons of both options. She was an
angelic being; the decision to go astray shouldn't even be a card in her hand,
but it was. Freewill – the greatest blessing and curse.

      
Nimbus
had denied her this right and while she had resented him for it in the
beginning, she had found it strangely arousing and eventually came to
appreciate and worship him for controlling her. Why did she revere the one who
had stripped her of her rights and worth, had used and abused her and reduced
her to nothing more than an object and a plaything? He robbed her of her soul
and purity. Denied her a choice and she was following him to hell with praises
on her lips.

      
The
truth was mind-boggling, unreal. She fell in love with a demon and made an idol
out of him, a god whom she worshiped against her conscience, but completely in
accordance with what was buried deep inside her wayward heart. She loved Nimbus
and that was why she had fallen. She tasted the forbidden fruit he offered her
and liked the sweet, juicy flavor of sin too much to walk away from it like she
should have. She put him first in her heart and God second - original sin.

      
“Do
you know what happened the night you left the orphanage to go and check on Mr.
Hemingway?” Cassiel asked gravely, “A coven of vampires attacked the orphanage,
seeking to feed on the children. Nimbus and a few other demons went with them
to offer protection in case they were met with any angelic opposition. They
attacked because they knew you left and Celeste was alone. Two of the women who
lived with the children there were killed. Celeste defended them as best as she
could, but she was outnumbered. Nimbus wounded her and was about to kill her
until Michael and I came and fought them off.”

      
Sonya
was appalled. “Is Celeste all right?”

      
“She
is fine. Nimbus is not the angel he once was, or the man you like to pretend he
is. He is a demon and no amount of submission from you or preaching from anyone
else is ever going to change that.”

      
“But
he could become a black angel.”

      
“He
has had thousands of years to repent if he wanted to. If he was truly penitent
he would have done so by now. He won't change, Sonya, but you should.”

      
“I
can't just leave him.”

      
“Why
not?” Cassiel's tone sounded firm and serious. “Is it worth your soul, Sonya?
Do you really want to spend eternity in hell with him?”

      
Of
course she didn't, but the harrowing truth of the abyss seemed to pale in
comparison to losing Nimbus forever and crushing him by leaving. Somehow that
seemed a greater hell than the one she was now damned to because of her
trespasses.

      
Still,
her lover was a demon - a devil that broke into an orphanage to serve as a
bodyguard so the undead could feed on the blood of children by night. He
injured a good friend of hers and would have killed the angel if not for the
providence of divine intervention.

      
Nimbus
was an incubus. She knew they often acted as voyeurs while people made love and
stood in their rooms soaking up the erotic dreams humans had. On occasion they
had sex with people in their sleep and sometimes took them by force if they
woke up and tried to scream or struggle. Her conscience was appalled by the
heinous crimes this soulless creature of hell had committed, but to her undying
disbelief, her taken heart said: “I don't care.”

      
She
had heard it said that a kingdom divided against itself could not stand, but
how much worse to have a divided soul? She was damned no matter which choice
she made.

      
“Why
did you come here?” She evaded.

      
“To
let you know that as of today you are no longer an angel.” Cassiel placed a
hand firmly on her shoulder.

      
Sonya
gasped when she felt strength and power leave her and the very last trace of
light. She fell to her knees from the impact of the quiet, yet powerful
transformation from angel to human.

      
There
was so much sorrow in his violet eyes. “I'm sorry.”

      
“I
feel so vulnerable and afraid all of a sudden like a blanket of protection is
gone,” she confided in horror as she shuddered with fear. “Please take it away.
This is a terrible feeling. I feel so lost and alone.”

      
His
face was fraught with pain. “That is precisely what you are, Sonya.”

      
Her
eyes stung. “I don't understand. Why am I human instead of a demon?”

      
He
hesitated, violet eyes shimmering with the greatest depth of emotion she had
ever seen in him. “Someone spoke in your defense and asked that the Father turn
you into a human instead. He graciously did so.”

      
“Who
was it?”

      
“What
matters is that you are now in mortal danger. You lost the Father's protection
and favor the night you sold your soul to the devil, but now that you are human
you are even more vulnerable. You need to get as far away from Nimbus as
possible, because if he finds you he won't show you any mercy this time. He will
know you are human and that you have spoken to me.”

      
“He
is going to make me a demon, isn't he?”

      
“That
seems to be his intent with you.”

      
“But
I can become a crusnik once he turns me. I can ask forgiveness.”

      
Cassiel
looked disturbed by her plan. “A penitent fallen angel can become a crusnik,
but Nimbus wants to mate with you and claim you as his eternal blood mate. The
very nature of demons suffocates any light that tries to penetrate the darkness
of their souls. A few have reverted back to the light, but they are rare and I
have never heard of a demon's blood mate leaving their partner and becoming a
black angel.”

      
“I
can be the first.”

      
“You
don't understand the deep, irrevocable bond of the mating and claiming ritual.
Once bitten and marked, you are that being's mate forever, not simply for a
lifetime,” Cassiel warned. “You will become the very evil you wish to flee from
the more time goes by. Your body and soul will be united to your mate in an
unshakeable bond that time and distance can neither change, nor break. Some say
the bond extends beyond the grave into the afterlife. That the ties that bind
them will keep them united and help mates find each other even if one of them
is dead and the other is still living. You can run from him if you wish, but
ultimately he will come back to haunt you.”

      
She
shivered. Her future certainly looked grim.

      
“The
best scenario for you is to stay human and run. Don't let him find you.”

      
“Wait.
What if by chance he catches me and makes me his blood mate and a demon? If I
flee right away and come to you will God turn me into a black angel?” she asked
imploringly.

      
“If
you have remorse for your sins then yes, but if you are torn he will know it.
Even if he changes you and your heart is divided you are only damning yourself.
You must be truly sorry for your trespasses. If Nimbus bites you come to me as
quickly as you can, but don't dawdle. The more time passes after you are
claimed, the more evil you will become and you don't want to reach the point of
no return, the soulless point where God can no longer use you. Here. I believe
you will need this.” Cassiel gave her a coin-bag that probably contained gold,
“Now go. My prayers are with you.”

      
He
disappeared before her eyes. Sonya was numb with shock, but she knew what she had
to do before she had a second thought. She had to run.

***

      
Nimbus
was floored when he discovered Sonya went missing. The anger came, but not as
immediately as he would have thought. What preceded it was a feeling he hadn't
anticipated: loss. There was a startling ache in his chest that stole the air
from his lungs until he couldn't breathe or feel anything but the terrible
anguish gnawing viciously inside of him. He didn't need this damned human
emotion, but he couldn't get rid of it. It had always been there. He felt this
ache the day he was cast out of heaven and Sonya just stood there and watched
him leave. She could have followed, but she didn't. She chose light over
darkness. Chose God over him and it hurt Nimbus more than he could bear.

      
His
eyes stung and he felt a lump in his throat. God only knew he might have caved
to the intolerable moisture that threatened to unleash itself if Jude hadn't
walked in. “Where is that curvaceous, little slave of yours?”

      
“Gone.”

      
“You
sold her?”

      
“She
ran away,” Nimbus hardened himself so he didn't sound as depressed and pathetic
as he felt inside.

      
“The
insufferable bitch. Would you like me to send someone to hunt her down?”

      
“Summon
a few dire wolves up from the underworld, but I want her brought to me alive and
unharmed.”

      
Jude
grinned. “You want her healthy so you can break her yourself?”

      
“Something
like that,” Nimbus muttered absently.

      
“I
will get started.”

      
Jude
left, giving Nimbus the solitude he yearned for. Then the anger came. The
silent rage he waited for. The ache was still there, but the wrath hardened his
bleeding heart. The traitor would pay. For the rest of her miserable life she
would pay and for all of eternity thereafter. So she didn't view him as her
master? This was all a game to her? A game that could be ended whenever she
grew bored, or her fickle nature kicked in and she decided to change sides
again? That rubbish had no place in his world and she would learn it very
quickly once he got her back.

      
Nimbus
recalled the one and only time Sonya had ever said she loved him. It was that
day he made her pull that cart through London in the buff while they were
invisible to human eyes. She wanted him to say it back, but he hadn't. Would
she have stayed if he had? Would his love have been enough to keep her here
with him, to make her faithful and obedient to the point of damnation?