Broken Lion (23 page)

I giggled. “Did you just say with your
you
?”

“I did.”

When our entrees arrived, we did the same guessing game.

“This is really good beef,” Lion said. “I think it’s brisket. Mouth watering, I’m telling you.”

“Can I have a taste?”

“Sure.”

“Should we switch plates?”

“I’ve got a better idea. Slide your hand out to the middle of the table.”

I did.

His covered mine. I felt the warmth before he actually touched me. Before I knew it, he was caressing my hand with his. It was ridiculously sexual.

“Getting wet?”

“I’m sitting on your napkin, aren’t I?”

He chuckled. “Right.” He continued to caress me. “Do you think if I slid my seat around next to you, I could finger you without anyone noticing?”

“You might confuse Pierre when he returns. We don’t want him tripping over you or your chair.”

“Then I’ll leave my chair where it is.”

I heard him stand up and felt a breeze when he came around beside me.

“What about your brisket?”

“I’m gonna give you my brisket.”

“Now, Dick,” I cautioned. “I meant your meat. Not your
meat
meat.”

“I did too.”

“Oh my gosh!” I jumped when I felt fingers slide up my ribs. “Is that you?”

“It’s me.”

“What are you doing?”

“Trying to find your face.” His fingers brushed over my boob and hit the nipple.

“That’s not my face!”

“I could tell. But I’d really like to kiss it.”

Oh, wow. I was so turned on being unable to see.

His hand cupped my breast and massaged it.

“You better stop.”

“I’m only stopping because I want you to taste my beef.”

“
Your
beef? Or your
beef
beef?”

“I meant the brisket.” His hand worked up over my collar bone and up my neck. I shivered wherever he touched. Eventually, his fingers found my jawline, then my lips. “Okay. Smell this.”

“Is it your beef?” I giggled. A moment later, I smelled beef. Not man beef. Brisket beef. “Yum.” I felt warmth near my lips as he pressed a piece of warm beef against my lips. It wasn’t his hard cock like I had secretly hoped, but I put it in my mouth anyway and savored it. “Wow, that’s incredible. Did they marinate that for a week and slow cook it for like two days? It’s so flavorful.”

“What I want to know is, are
you
marinating like you said earlier?”

“Hey!” I felt his hand on my knee. “What are you doing, Dick?” His hand slid up between my thighs.

“I’m going to slow roast you right where you sit.”

“I don’t think so,” I giggled.

“I do. Did you wear something easy access like I asked?”

“Yes, but this muffin is not about to be stuffed.”

“I wasn’t planning on it. But I would like a taste.”

His finger was already prying my thong aside.

This was too hot to stop. I tilted my hips and opened my thighs. Then I gasped. “What if Pierre comes?”

“I wasn’t planning on fingering Pierre. And if you come first, we won’t have to worry about that, will we?”

I stifled a gasp when I felt his scruffy face push between my legs.

This was crazy.

I was loving every second of it.

And I couldn’t see a damn thing.

But I could feel every bit of it. Especially his tongue.

Oh my goodness.

I couldn’t begin to describe what it did to my clit.

I don’t know if it was the fact that I got turned on every time Lion was near, or the fact that I was so focused on his mesmerizing scent and his seductive voice, or the feel of his hot head between my legs, or whatever magic he was working with his tongue, but I came quickly. I did my best to stay quiet. I hoped no one overheard.

After, he slithered up my body and kissed me deeply.

I tasted myself on his tongue and I liked me just fine.

“I’ll return the favor later,” I sighed.

“I look forward to it, Ivy.”

“By the way, was that my dessert?”

“Why do you ask?”

“I hear the dessert here is to die for.”

“Really. What do you suggest?”

“The cherry pie.”

We both laughed softly.

Who said Naked Sensations wasn’t a sex club?

Chapter 25

BRIGID

We basked in the warm afterglow of incredible sex on Lion’s leopard print bed in his wildcat themed bedroom. We had come straight to his place in the Hills after our dinner at Naked Sensations to get naked and to come. Many times each. Our clothes littered a trail from the front entrance to this bed like breadcrumbs of love. I meant breadcrumbs of sex. Not love. Just sex. Numerous condom wrappers were scattered around the bedroom. It turned out that the ultra studded condoms had something going for them. This was our third box of them, despite Lion always complaining about the tight fit.

Sex with him was so easy and so good. Why did it have to be so wrong?

He ran his fingers casually through my messy pile of hair.

“You ever think about having another kid, Mrs. Smithsonian?”

My eyes popped out of my skull. “Uhhhh… Now and then?” I didn’t want to hurt his feelings by giving a definitive no or “not with my patient.” Not that I thought Lion would make a bad father. He would be a good one. But I couldn’t possibly think about the topic of more kids with Lion or anybody else. I barely had time for one. Besides, this was supposed to be a fun fling. It wasn’t going to last. We both knew that. Kid talk was not fling appropriate.

“I think about having another kid,” Lion said thoughtfully.

Had he said another? I was suddenly uncomfortable. I wasn’t sure why. “Um, I thought you said you didn’t have a family. Except for your cats.”

“I don’t have a family. No brothers or sisters. My mom is dead. My dad was a deadbeat and is probably dead in a ditch somewhere. My grandparents are all dead too.”

“I’m so sorry, Lion.” Three of my four grandparents were still alive and both my wonderful parents were too. So was my younger brother. I was very lucky compared to Lion.

“It’s okay. I’ve got people in my life who are like family. But I think about having another kid.” He choked up. “I’ve always wanted a real family. Of my own.”

“What do you mean by another?”

“I had a son named Cali.”

“Cali?”

“Yeah. Short for California.”

“That’s so cute.”

“He sure was.”

“Can I ask what happened to him?”

“He’s dead.”

Oh, geez. Lion’s life was filled with tragedy. I didn’t want to hear any more, for my sake. My heart was breaking for him. The idea of losing my Daniel would kill me. I couldn’t bear it if it were to actually happen. I squeezed his hand. “I’m so sorry, Lion.” Tears spilled down my cheeks and I sniffed, wiping them away.

“He was ten months old. We put him to bed one night and he didn’t wake up the next morning. They said it was SIDS.”

“Oh, Lion.” I was torn between compassion for him and wanting to ask about the mother. It wasn’t the right time. He needed my understanding not my doubt. My heart went out to him. I rolled onto my side and draped my arm and my knee over his naked body. “There’s nothing I can say that will make it better,” I said softly. “Just know that I… know that I…” I couldn’t think of anything that fit within the parameters of a secret fling.

“Thanks. You’re a good woman, Brigid. Really good.”

“Thank you, Lion. I feel the same way about you.”

“Really?”

“Yes. How could you doubt that?”

“I don’t know. None of my relationships with women ever worked out. If you include my mom, I lost all the important ones.”

I remembered about his mother’s breast cancer from the YouTube documentary. She passed when he was 16. So sad. I wondered if the mother of his son had died too. I wasn’t going to ask.

“This is gonna sound dumb,” he said, “but… it’s stupid. Never mind. Forget I said anything.”

“What?” I squeezed his arm. “You can tell me.”

He turned to me and searched my eyes with his. “Do you want to be my girlfriend?”

His doctor-patient girlfriend? I struggled not to show fear. I had been afraid of this.

“If you don’t want to, I’ll understand.” He didn’t sound like he’d understand. He sounded on the verge of heartbreak.

I never imagined Lion would be such a sensitive man underneath has savage exterior. The question was, what did I want out of our relationship? I was so touched that he’d asked about having kids with me. I wanted nothing more than a vibrant family of my own. But I had Daniel and my career to think about. Any unfilled fantasies I had about having the perfect family with the perfect man had to take a backseat to the here and now. This strange and necessarily temporary relationship with Lion was challenging enough. Adding the commitment of being his girlfriend or having a child with him was more than I could deal with at that moment. What happened to this being a fling? That had been my plan. Maybe I should’ve been more explicit about that. I could kick myself for it, but it wouldn’t do any good.

I sighed heavily. “Can I think about it?”

He stared at me, his face unreadable. “Okay.”

I felt like an ass. I was hurting him and I knew it.

This was awful.

How had I ended up in this position?

<<<<<<<>>>>>>>

I didn’t know when I’d drifted off to sleep in the leopard bed, but I had.

When I woke, it was still dark out.

The bed was also empty.

Had I been in my own house, I might have freaked out, thinking Lion had left. I wasn’t sure why, but I would have. Anyway, this was his house. He had to be around here somewhere.

I climbed out of bed and walked into the hallway. I grabbed his black button-down dress shirt off the floor, the one he’d worn to Naked Sensations. I hadn’t seen it until after dinner. He looked damn good in a button down shirt and slacks and dress shoes. Very GQ. It was a shame I couldn’t show him off around town. Not that I cared. But I cared. Lion Maxwell was a prize in every sense of the word.

But the jury was still out on whether he would ever be my prize.

I buttoned up the black shirt. It hung down to my thighs and the sleeves covered my hands. His scent was all over it and all over me. I needed to put this shirt under my pillow at home. As a souvenir. I needed something to remember him by. Something told me this thing we had was coming to an end sooner than I would’ve liked.

I walked downstairs, searching the house for him.

The French doors in the living room were open. A warm summer night breeze blew inside. I walked out back and found him reclining on a lounger by the blue glow of the pool. All he wore were black boxers. His knee brace was off. Somehow, he’d managed the whole evening without it. Gwen was curled up in his lap, a fluffy black ball, purring as he stroked her.

“Hey.” I sat on the foot of the lounger.

“Hey.”

“Couldn’t sleep?”

“Guess not.”

I pressed my palm to his foot. “I’m sorry for…” I had to stop and think because his abs were distracting me like a flashing neon sign:
SEX! SEX! SEX!

He waited patiently, focused on stroking Gwen.

“I’m sorry for how difficult this is.”

“Yeah,” he muttered.

Crickets chirped. It was very quiet this high up in the Hollywood Hills. You wouldn’t know we were surrounded by fourteen million people. The only sign was the wind of the constant traffic that twinkled far below.

“Lion, I don’t know what to tell you. I want to be your girlfriend. I just can’t.”

His eyes met mine. “That’s something.”

“It’s more than something. I haven’t dated anyone since Donald. Well, not seriously. It was just one date here and there. Nothing ever worked out. I didn’t even make out with any of them. Just a few clumsy goodnight kisses that didn’t have any sparks. You my friend, are all sparks.”

“Like the Allspark?”

“The what?”

“Transformer’s reference. Ask Daniel.”

I shook my head, grinning. “Right.” Why did Lion have to be so incredibly perfect? “You’re so good for him.”

“Thanks.”

Although Lion hadn’t been spending much time with Daniel outside of karate class lately, Daniel talked about Lion all the time and was always asking when we were going to Disneyland with him. I was starting to feel bad for Daniel that he wasn’t getting any time with Lion lately.

I squeezed his ankle. “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything, Irish.”

“Will you wait for me?” I was afraid to say it. I had asked Donald to wait for me just about every day of our marriage for the last several years of it.

“I’ll wait for you forever, Brigid.” He smiled that adorable boyish smile.

“I appreciate the sentiment. But let me tell you what I mean before you go agreeing to anything.”

“Shoot.”

“Here are my ground rules. One, no sex.”

He winced. “For how long?”

“You said you’d wait forever.” I was half joking, but memories of a disappointed Donald stabbed my heart. It wasn’t fair to ask any man to wait forever for sex. That wasn’t a relationship. Just ask Donald. I was well aware I was asking Lion to do the same thing that had destroyed my marriage. Was I asking too much of him and me? I told myself my connection with Lion was different. With Donald, we had met when I was a naive nineteen year old with very little sexual experience and I had gotten accidentally pregnant right away. At the time, I barely knew who I was as a person. Now I was ten years older and knew myself that much better. Lion and I had a connection I’d never had with Donald. With Lion, everything was always fun and light and felt right. I hoped it was enough. The only way to know was to take the risk. With any luck, things would work out this time.

“Okay,” Lion said, “how about five years. I can go five years without fucking you. But that’s it. Will that work? Oh, and my ground rule is that in five years, we have to make up for all the sex we missed.”

I laughed. “I was thinking more like six months or a year.”

“Oh, shit. You shoulda said that. I can do that easy. As long as we make up for it after.”

I smiled. “Agreed. The other rule is that we can only be friends. No dinner dates and no lunch dates.”