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Authors: Olivia Jake

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 “Voices in your head talking again?” James
asked and Alex laughed, shaking her head.

 “Gosh, I’m really not usually this spacy.
Someone must have spiked my margarita.” She deflected.

James tenderly brushed her hair off her forehead
and placed his hand there as if he were feeling for fever. His touch made Alex
jump, producing a small smile from James. Even though they were small touches,
between this and his hand on her back, there was something very forward about
him. Like there was no question as to whether he could put his hands on her. It
was too familiar too quickly. They hadn’t established a bond yet. It was as if
he felt entitled. But there was something that compelled Alex to play along.

 “Any fever, doctor?” It must have been the
tequila flirting, Alex wasn’t quite sure where that came from.

 “I might need to do a more thorough exam,
just to be sure.” James said, making Alex flush again and Sam clear her throat.
Laurent picked up the ball and changed the subject.

 “Alex, I was just saying that Sam had told
me you just came back from a shoot too.” Laurent asked. They had each recounted
their recent travels, and now it was Alex’s turn.

 “Yes, though not nearly as dramatic as Romania.
We were down in the Galapagos Islands for a photoshoot for the better part of a
week.” Alex tried to play it off.

 “Who were you shooting? And, any pesky
directors imposing their wills?” James asked, playfully referring back to when
they had met. Alex had put her foot in it, lamenting 11
th
hour input
from a director after the shoot practically wrapped. This was, of course,
before she knew he was a director.

Alex laughed at the reminder and James shot her a
mischievous grin. But then, upon thinking about who she shot, Alex’s breath
caught. She swallowed and recovered, hoping no one noticed, “Um, Marco Flores
for Vanity Fair. They’re doing an article on him.” Not one to brag, that’s all
Alex offered.

 “You’re kidding! I’m meeting with him next
week. He’s testing for the lead in my next movie. Well this evening just got
even better! Now I can get the real inside story on him. Spill!” James said, a
little too enthusiastically.

Alex felt her hackles go up. It wasn’t just
because of her relationship with Marco. It was that suddenly, she became useful
to James. Like this had just turned into a business deal. She had worked in
this industry long enough to know that information was power, especially dirt,
which obviously, James was keen on getting. Whatever spaciness or flirtatious
feelings Alex had before was replaced with steely resolve. She suddenly felt
very protective of Marco. She knew that what she had been privy to, the Marco
that she got to know, that was for her eyes only. Aside from their relationship,
what she saw with his family was so intimate, so personal, she would never
share that with anyone. To do so would be a betrayal even beyond this date.

That said, she had spent the better part of the
evening listening to James recount his latest production, and what he had to go
through and who he had to win over in order to get the movie that he wanted.
She knew enough to know that challenging a man like James head-on was a no-win
situation. She figured if she played dumb, he’d buy it and leave it be.

Wherever her soft, feminine, flirty side had come
from, it, in that instant, retreated.

 “There’s really not much to tell. I was just
the photographer. You’d have to ask the writer. All I do is take the pretty
pictures.” James nodded, accepting all too easily Alex’s explanation, and took
another bite of his dinner. That he didn’t challenge her description of her
career spoke volumes, whether it be lack of respect or lack of interest to
delve further. Interestingly, Alex saw something flash across Laurent’s face.
As quickly as it registered, that’s how quickly his poker face reappeared. He
was a perceptive one and Alex guessed that he didn’t quite buy her simple,
dismissive answer. But he was also respectful. Alex knew she could trust Sam
not to tell him about her relationship with Marco, but by the look on his face,
it seemed her answer to James’ question told Laurent more than she had ever
intended. Thankfully, he didn’t let on, and the conversation drifted to James’
next movie, which he was happy to talk about and Alex did her best to feign
interest.

The rest of the evening went fine. More small talk
about all of their respective projects. By then, it felt almost like a client
dinner. A lot of industry talk. Nothing too deep or personal. Whatever Alex had
felt earlier, she now knew this would be the first and last date with James,
but she was glad at what it proved to her. That whatever it was that she and
Marco had, it was special. On paper, and given everything she had experienced
with actors, James was leaps and bounds the better choice for her, if the two
were competing. But that didn’t matter. What she felt for Marco wasn’t
something that Alex had ever felt before. All she could do was give it a shot.

Alex tried not to retreat back into her head, but
it was a struggle once it became clear that she had no interest in James.
Unfortunately, all she could think about was Marco, and how much she wished he
were there with her.

James was the one who had picked the restaurant,
one of the trendier spots, known for being a celebrity hangout. When the four
of them finally walked out, sure enough, there were paparazzi. Caught up in
James’ question about seeing her again when he got back from a scouting trip
the following week, Alex didn’t think much of the flashes as they went off. She
assumed that because she wasn’t anyone, and no one in their group was a
celebrity per se, that the shots of the four of them, or really, the two
couples, wouldn’t ever be seen by the light of day. She also figured that by
the time James got back, he’d forget to call, or realize there wasn’t any
spark.

 

Alex was wrong on all counts. First, apparently
James thought the date went far better than she did as he leaned in for the
kiss at the valet. Alex turned her head so that he got her cheek. And second,
the shots of her leaving the restaurant with James’ hand again on her low back,
and the attempted kiss, found their way into the online tabloids the next day.

It took a call that morning from Kara to alert
her. “Alex, sweetie? Have you been online yet today?”

 “Not yet, why?” Alex asked, still sweaty
from her run.

 “Ummm, there are pictures of you and James
Willen leaving 1 Bistro.”

Alex’s heart started beating faster, “Seriously?
Is he that big of a deal?”

 “Well, yeah, he’s kind of the hot director
right now…” Kara said, trailing off.

While not thrilled about her picture being in the
tabloids, Alex didn’t put a whole lot of stock into it. People in the industry
knew who she was, but she doubted there was really that much interest in a
director and photographer. Until her she got call waiting. Then panic really
set in.

 “Kara, I gotta go. Marco’s calling.” Alex
said with dread.

 “Shit. Ok, call me after you talk with him.
If you want.”

Alex hung up and picked up Marco’s call, trying to
calm herself. “Good morning, Marco.”

 “How was your date last night, Alexandra?”
his voice was like ice. She had seen him upset on the trip that first night,
but this, this was a hundred times colder than that ever was.

 “I can explain, Marco.”

There was silence, and then Marco spoke, “Is there
really anything to explain?” he sighed and then said, “You know, it’s ironic,
no? I was so concerned about how you’d react to seeing pictures of me and
Kimberly, I never once thought that the shoe might be on the other foot.”

 “It’s not what you think, Marco.”

 “Then what is it, Alexandra? Was it a date?”

Alex paused. It was a date. She couldn’t lie.
“Yes, but it was something that was set up so long ago, and it was a double
date, it didn’t mean anything, Marco. I’m not interested in him at all.”

 “Then why did you go?”

That was the question. Why
did
she go? If
she were honest, she went because she was hedging her bets. She was testing
herself to see if what she felt for Marco was real, different, special. And if
she admitted that she went because she was so unsure of what she had with
Marco, she knew that might be the end of whatever it was.

 “I don’t know, Marco.” She said softly.

 “Oh, I think you do, Alexandra.” His icy
tone was now tinged with anger.

 “Please, Marco. You said yourself that we
need to talk, and that we would when you got back. I don’t want to have this
conversation over the phone either.” She hated that she was pleading with him,
but she knew that nothing good was going to come of talking with 3,000 miles between
them.

 “You know, Alexandra, I have never expected
anything from you but the truth. All I want is honesty. Honesty with yourself,
your feelings, and with me. And I have been nothing but honest with you. I
deserve that in return, Alexandra.”

Alex felt like she was being scolded. For someone
who was eight years her junior, he was making her feel like a child.

 “You’re right, you do, Marco.” Was all she
could say.

 “I’ll call you when I get home.” Was the
last thing he said before he hung up. Alex felt sick to her stomach wondering
if she just threw away something that she was just starting to want. Something
that she wasn’t at all looking for, but was suddenly terrified of losing.

CHAPTER 20

 

It was hard to understand how quickly Alex could
go from not wanting to be with Marco to being overwhelmed with grief that a
couple hours out with a man she couldn’t care less about would end what she and
Marco had. Actually, she could deal with the heartache of it ending, much as it
might hurt, she would know why it did. But the thought that she could have hurt
him or that he lost trust in her, those thoughts were far worse.

Kara made good on her promise and booked Alex on
two shoots keeping her busy for much of the second week of Marco’s trip. After
their last conversation, Alex hadn’t heard from Marco, and didn’t expect to. In
fact, she wondered if that was it, that it was completely over. She didn’t have
the guts to call him, so she just waited to see if he would make contact once
back in town. She wasn’t sure exactly when he would be back, which just made
the waiting even more interminable.

It was Saturday afternoon, and Alex decided to
take her dogs on a nice long walk. It was one of those perfect LA days where it
was warm, but not hot, and a nice breeze was blowing. Alex was on her way back,
a few houses away from her own when she looked up to see Marco leaning against
a car. She couldn’t help but instinctively break out into a huge grin. Then she
remembered their last conversation, and her grin faded, though she found it
hard to keep a bit of a smile off her face, she was so genuinely happy to see
him. As they got closer, he smiled.

 “Looks like you wore them out.” Marco said.
Both Annie and Ansel were panting.

Alex didn’t have a clever comeback. She was so surprised
to see him. Surprised. Nervous. Excited…  So she just said, “Hi, Marco.
It’s
really
good to see you.” And he knew she was speaking from the
heart. He could tell. And his body language immediately changed as he uncrossed
his arms and exhaled.

He started to reach for her and then stopped to
ask, “Are they friendly? Or are they going to protect you if I hug you.”

Alex laughed, “Oh, these two? They just look mean,
but the worst they’ll do is lick you to death. Especially Ansel. He’s a lover.”
They just grinned at each other, then Alex said, “Come on, let’s go inside.”
She held her right hand out for him to take, holding the leashes in her left.
The minute he put his hand into hers, she sighed audibly. She knew he heard
her, as he smiled when he looked over at her. She didn’t care. That small touch
felt so good, it both relaxed and excited her.

Once inside, Alex let the dogs off their leashes
and they excitedly smelled Marco, then went straight to their water bowls,
loudly slurping.

 “
Dios
, Alexandra. How far did you
walk them?” he laughed.

They both watched the dogs drink for a bit,
allowing them to focus on something other than each other. After being apart,
and after their last conversation, Alex wasn’t sure how this was going to play
out.

 “Well, I’ve had a lot on my mind. I might
have gotten lost in my thoughts on the walk.”

Marco understood the inference and pulled her to
him, brushing a few stray hairs off her forehead. He leaned down and kissed her
passionately. The minute his lips met hers, Alex felt herself exhale into the
kiss, into his arms. All the worry, all the fear melted away as their lips and
tongues played and danced. They kissed and nibbled for a long time until Alex
smiled against his lips and he smiled back. They finally pulled away from each
other, now they were the ones panting. Alex couldn’t help but grin at him. She
also couldn’t remember ever having this kind of reaction to a man. Such pure,
unadulterated joy at seeing someone.

 “I missed you, Marco.” As simple a statement
as that was, Alex wasn’t sure she had ever uttered it before, to anyone. She
had spent a lifetime focusing on work and taking care of herself. It wasn’t
that she was closed off to relationships, it just never was part of what she
needed to survive. All she knew was reliance on self. Even when she was younger
and she had Dan and Ruth, she always knew she had to carry her fair share,
because what if one day they died suddenly just like her parents? Then what?
Alex’s survival instincts were so much of what defined her, and letting herself
get so attached to someone so as to miss them, well, that vulnerability was a
luxury that she couldn’t afford.

 “I missed you too,
Corazon
.”

Alex was suddenly nervous. After everything they
had done together, it was odd being in her kitchen with him. All of their time
on the island had been on relatively neutral ground. Even though it was his
family home, it hadn’t been his for a while. But now, they were there in her
house, with her animals. It wasn’t just a fling on a shoot that would end when
they came back to reality. They were
in
reality. Breaking Alex from her
thoughts, Tabitha popped in through the dog door and came straight over,
rubbing herself up against them both of them. Then she sauntered over to Ansel
and rubbed her head up under his chin. He sniffed her briefly and gave a half
hearted lick as she passed him, and then arched against Annie and before making
her way through the rest of the house.

Marco laughed out loud as he watched Tabitha mark
everyone in her path. “Well it’s clear who runs the house!” Alex laughed too,
this small dose of reality actually taking the edge off.

Then his gaze turned intense. “Which way to your
bedroom?”

Alex swallowed as her heartbeat increased, “Um, I
thought we were going to talk.” She said weakly.

Marco smiled, “We will,
mi amor
. But all
I’ve been doing for the last two weeks is talking. And I’ve waited far too long
to touch you, and hold you, and be inside you. I don’t want to wait any
longer.” Alex wasn’t going to argue. She took his hand and led him down the
hallway to her bedroom. Once inside, she picked Tabitha up off the bed and
deposited her out in the hallway. Only then did she close the door.

 “I run the house.” Alex said with a smile.

 “Ok,
mi amor
. You can prove that to
me later. But now, in here, I’m in charge.” Marco said and moved to her in an
instant. He lifted her tank top of her and undid her bra in a matter of
seconds. His hands were so hot on her body as he caressed her back, up the
sides of her waist to her breasts. He kneaded them in his hands before bending
down to take one nipple into his hungry mouth. There was an urgency to the way
he took her, claimed her. He was acting like a starving man who was just
presented with a buffet to feast upon, and Alex was more than happy to feed
him.

Alex was overwhelmed with sensations, both
physical and emotional. The last few weeks had been such a roller coaster. She
had gone from being with Marco almost all day and night to practical radio
silence. And then there was the odd intermission with James. And now, here he
was, his body pressed up against hers, his hands moving like they couldn’t feel
enough of her skin, like no matter how tightly he held her, how much skin his
hands caressed, it felt like it might never be enough to satisfy his need.
Feeling so wanted, so desired, Alex completely surrendered to it, to him.

He deftly slid her running shorts off and moved
her backwards to the bed, never once taking his lips or hands off of her as
they moved. He only broke away for long enough to pull his clothes off, and
then, as soon as he did, he was back on her, pressing his body to hers, rubbing
his hands over her skin, kissing her like he just couldn’t get enough.

Alex had never been with a man as passionate or as
focused as Marco. When they were together, she felt like there wasn’t anyone or
anything else on his mind. Only her. And that, alone, made her feel special.
But coupled with what his body and hands and lips and everything did to her,
special didn’t even come close to describing all that he made her feel. 

But there, in Alex’s bedroom, it was different
than any of the times on the islands. The intensity with which Marco took Alex
was heart pounding. He was almost like a man possessed. It wasn’t tender, it
wasn’t slow, it was… necessary. Like he had to be inside her. He was on top of
her and swiftly thrust himself in making Alex gasp. Once he was in, he finally
slowed down and took a moment. Alex watched him as he came back to the present
and smiled a sexy smile down at her. He pinned her wrists above her head and
then slowly started sliding in and out and exhaled.

 “Oh, Alexandra, I’ve missed you so much. You
feel so good. Too good.” He said, sounding almost pained, eyes half open, lids
slowly closing then opening again as he savored the feeling, slowly sliding all
the way in and then all the way out.

 “Too good, Marco? How is that possible?” she
asked breathily, pushing against his wrists that held her, testing him.

He laughed a low laugh and took a deep breath as
he leaned down and kissed her again, then rolled to his side, rolling her with
him, making her yelp, as he set her on top of him. Alex’s hair spilled down her
shoulders as she now looked down on him. He moved his hands to her hips as he
guided her back and forth, grinding her deeply to him. The minute he did this,
he could feel that ridge inside her that he now knew would quickly push her
over the edge. Alex’s eyes rolled back into her head.

 “Oooooh, Marco, ooooh, oooh Marco, god,
Marco, oh baby, ooooh Marco…” Alex kept moaning his name as he increased the
rhythm, pulling her hips back and forth, faster and faster, Alex was now
grinding and grinding feeling her orgasm build faster and faster and then
shatter as she bucked and spasmed on top of him, moaning the whole way.

When she finally opened her eyes, she found him
grinning up at her, “I love watching you come, Alexandra.” Alex blushed, though
she was already flushed, but she was embarrassed for some reason, smiling a shy
smile as she looked away.

 “Alexandra, look at me.” Marco said,
snapping Alex’s eyes back to him. “
Mi amor
, why does that embarrass
you?”

Alex shrugged. It was a level of intimacy that she
just wasn’t used to, yet he embraced it, welcomed it. She wasn’t ready to
discuss it, so she took a trick out of his playbook and leaned down to kiss
him, changing the subject. Once her body was pressed close to his, he again
rolled her over so that he was back on top of her. This time, he didn’t take it
slow as he lifted her legs up to his shoulders and fucked her, hard. She was so
wet from her orgasm, and still so sensitive, that it didn’t take her long for
her to feel herself build again as he pounded into her. Her thighs were
shaking, and she was moaning as his thrusts continued, harder and deeper until
she started spasming and came again. Only after her last twitches did he pull
out and come all over her stomach and chest. He stayed above her for a moment
to admire his work and then collapsed onto the bed next to her, panting
heavily.

He swiped a bit of cum onto his finger and held it
to her mouth. Alex opened, licking the cum off and sucking his finger. “Mmmm,
you taste good.” She said in a post-sex haze, making him chuckle.

 “You look so sexy with my cum all over you,
Alexandra. I wish I had a mirror so you could see yourself.”

Alex propped herself up onto her elbows and looked
down at her glistening torso. “Looks like you saved up for me.”

 “Dirty girl.” He said and then pinched her
nipple, making her yelp.

 “Literally.” She said and giggled, then got
up to go clean herself off. When she came back to bed she snuggled up next to
him. She was so happy to have him there in her bed. It wasn’t just the sex,
though that was amazing. Curling up next to him and wrapping her body around
his felt like coming home. It felt safe and strong and sexy. But mostly, lying
there with him just felt right.

They lay there for a while, and then she said as
traced her fingers over his torso, “I’m really glad you came over.”

 “Me too,
mi amor
.”

 “When did you get in?”

 “A few hours ago.”

 “And you came right over?” she was
flattered, and shocked.

 “I told you, I’d already waited far too long
to be with you. I didn’t want to wait any longer.”

 “Why didn’t you call? What if I weren’t
home?”

 “I didn’t want to have any more phone
conversations. I needed to see you. I needed to feel you.” he stroked her skin
and then continued, “I don’t like the phone. I don’t like not seeing who I’m
talking to. I needed to see your reaction, it’s the only way I know. It’s the
only way I can be sure.”

The words he was saying were exactly how Alex
felt. There were many ways that they were different, but knowing they shared
similar feelings like this made Alex feel even more connected to him.

 “Sure of what?”

 “Of how you feel about me, Alexandra.”

 “And you’re sure how
you
feel about
me
?”
she asked tentatively.

 “Alexandra, I’ve been sure from the start.
You’re the one who’s scared, who needs convincing.”

 “I don’t need convincing anymore. It doesn’t
mean I’m not still scared. But I know how I feel.” And it was true. If Alex
weren’t sure before Marco had shown up on her doorstep, she was from the moment
she saw him leaning against his car waiting for her, and then even more sure
the minute they touched.

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