Building the Perfect Daddy (17 page)

Chapter Seventeen

A
few days after Ryder walked out of her office, on another day that Rob was scheduled to visit with Kylie and Zachary, a rainstorm eliminated the possibility of a meeting at the park. Lauryn didn't want to invite her ex-husband into her home because she was finally starting to feel as if it was
hers
, but she knew he didn't have any other place to take them.

She'd asked him about job prospects, because she was curious to know if he was serious about staying in Charisma or just putting in time until he figured things out. He told her, not very convincingly, that he'd been looking, then had the nerve to suggest that she could hire him to work at Sports Destination. She turned him down, clearly and unequivocally, and mentally crossed her fingers that he'd decide his options were better in California.

With other parts of the house under construction, she asked him to try to confine the kids to the living room, and then she left to run some errands. When she returned from her grocery shopping, she was relieved that he'd managed to do so, because the room was a disaster but at least it was the only room that was a disaster.

Kylie was on the floor, putting together a puzzle, and Zachary was slowly cruising around the table—a very recent development, gaining more strength and confidence with every step.

“Did everything go okay?” she asked cautiously.

“Zach peed on Daddy,” Kylie informed her eagerly.

Rob shrugged, looking sheepish. “I've never changed a baby boy's diaper before.”

And not many baby girl diapers, either, but she didn't bother to remind him of that fact.

“Other than that, I think it went well,” he told her. “We had a good time, didn't we, Kylie?”

The little girl nodded.

“I'm glad,” Lauryn said.

“Do you mean that?”

“Of course, I do. If you really want a relationship with Kylie and Zachary, I won't stand in the way.”

“What if I really want a relationship with you?”

She glanced at her daughter, who appeared to be engrossed in what she was doing but was undoubtedly absorbing every word of their conversation.

“Kylie, I got some of those fruit cups you like, if you want a snack before dinner.”

Of course, her always-hungry daughter eagerly abandoned her puzzle.

“Please make sure you sit at the table so you don't spill it.”

“I will,” Kylie promised.

“What was that about?” Rob asked.

“That was about not wanting our daughter to get any ideas about a reconciliation, because it's not going to happen. I've moved on with my life and so have you. You're just looking for the comfort of something familiar because you're feeling lost and lonely right now.”

“You fell in love with me once,” he reminded her. “If you give me a chance, I'm confident you'll fall in love with me again.”

She shook her head. “Have you listened to a single word I've said?”

“Of course, I have. But I'm asking you to think about our children—”

“Don't you dare tell me to think about our children,” she said, her voice low but sharp. “Every single day, everything I do, I do for them.”

“So tell me what I can do,” he said, duly chastised.

“You're supposed to be figuring out what you really want,” she reminded him. “And not using Kylie and Zachary—or me—to fill the emptiness in your life.”

“I know what I want,” he said.

Then he pressed his mouth to hers.

Lauryn shoved him away with both hands, shocked by his audacity. “What the—”

“Excuse me for interrupting,” Ryder said coolly from the doorway.

At the sound of his voice, Zachary's attention shifted immediately from the stuffed dog he'd found to the man in the doorway. With the toy still clutched in his fist, he dropped to the ground and began crawling toward him.

“You're not interrupting,” Lauryn said, mentally crossing her fingers that he hadn't witnessed her ex-husband's impulsive kiss. Since she'd declined the invitation to have dinner with his sister, Ryder had been giving her space. A lot more space than she wanted. And while she didn't know how to bridge the gap between him, she was pretty sure that kissing her ex-husband would not help her cause.

“I need your approval of the hardware for the master bathroom before the guys start to install it,” he told her.

She was surprised by the request. “Didn't I already sign off on it?”

He shook his head as he glanced down at the baby, who had reached his destination and was now pulling himself up to a standing position by holding on to the leg of Ryder's pants. “What are you doing, big guy?”

Zachary responded with a droolly smile.

“No.” Ryder kept his focus on the baby as he responded to her question. “The manufacturer couldn't supply your first choice—this is the alternate.”

“Okay. I'll come take a look.”

“We were in the middle of something here,” Rob reminded her.

“No,” she said bluntly. “We weren't.”

Kylie, her snack apparently finished, came back to the room to finish her puzzle. When she saw Zachary with her favorite stuffed dog in his hand, she snatched the toy from him.

“Mine,” she told him.

Of course, the abrupt loss of the toy caused her brother to burst into tears.

Ryder started to reach for the baby, instinctively wanting to soothe his distress. Then he glanced in Rob's direction and apparently thought better of it.

“Kylie,” Lauryn admonished wearily, lifting Zachary into her arms.

“But it's mine,” Kylie said, her own eyes filling with tears as she hugged the toy to her chest. “He always takes what's mine.”

“Come here, baby,” Rob said, holding out his arms to his daughter.

But Kylie turned away from him and threw herself at Ryder, wrapping her arms around his legs and sobbing dramatically, which did not please her father.

Ryder lowered his head to whisper something to Kylie, who drew in a deep, shuddery breath and relinquished her viselike grip on him.

“I'll be there in just a minute,” Lauryn told him.

He nodded and turned to head back up the stairs.

“Well, that was...enlightening,” Rob said.

Lauryn wasn't quite sure how to respond. While she would have preferred if her ex-husband had stayed gone, he had been making an effort to get to know his children, and it had to hurt to see how attached they were to the other man.

“They've seen Ryder almost every day for the past six weeks,” she told him.

“Are you really trying to make me feel better?” Rob mocked her effort. “Isn't it my own fault that my kids don't know me?”

“It's a simple fact,” she said. “Fault doesn't matter.”

“I guess it's like the song says—you don't know what you've got until it's gone. And it is gone, isn't it?”

She nodded.

And when he was finally gone, too, she called Tristyn again. “I need a favor.”

* * *

Ryder didn't stick around to see how long Lauryn's ex-husband stayed. He took a list of supplies that were required and headed to the hardware store.

He'd been right about the ex. The guy had come back to make another play for the woman he'd been foolish enough to walk away from, and while Ryder had been tempted to punch him in the face when he saw his hands on Lauryn, he'd held himself back. After all, it had nothing to do with him.

But several hours later, when he was staring at but not really watching the football game on television, she showed up at his door.

“Do you remember when I said that Kylie and Zachary were my world and you wanted to know what you were to me?” she asked him.

He tucked his hands in his pockets to prevent himself from reaching for her. “I remember that you didn't really answer the question.”

“Well, I'm ready to answer it now.”

“Okay,” he said cautiously.

“You are my gravity,” she said.

He wasn't quite sure how to interpret that. “I weigh you down?”

She shook her head, the corners of her mouth lifting just a little. “You keep me grounded. And—” she lifted her arms to link them behind his neck “—you are the force that attracts my body.”

“Am I?” His hands came out of his pockets and went around her, so that she was in his embrace.

“Yes.” She drew his mouth down to hers. “For the past four days, I feel as if I've been floating without any direction or purpose.” She brushed her lips against his. “I've missed you, Ryder.”

He kissed her back, savoring the sweet softness of her mouth. He'd missed her, too. He'd missed this. “You're making it hard for me to stay mad at you,” he admitted.

“Good, because I don't want you to be mad at me.” She pressed closer to him. “I'm sorry I hurt you. To be honest, I didn't know that I could. I didn't know what any of this meant to you.”

“Then let me make it clear—I love you, Lauryn.” He sucked in a breath and blew it out again, a little unsteadily. “And that's the first time I've ever said those words to a woman who isn't related to me,” he confided, “so let me try it again. I love you, Lauryn.” This time he smiled afterward. “And I love Kylie and Zachary, too. I understand that you have to figure out what's best for them, but I want to be a factor in that equation, too.”

She hugged him tight. “You are an essential factor in that equation.” And began to unfasten his shirt. “Let me show you how essential.”

“You don't fight fair,” he protested.

“I don't want to fight at all.” Parting the fabric, she pressed her lips to his skin, where his heart was beating for her.

He didn't want to fight, either. Not when the alternative was so tantalizing. But he held her at arm's length long enough to ask, “Who's with the kids now?”

“Tristyn.”

He lifted her sweater over her head, tossed it aside. “What time is she expecting you home?”

“I warned her I might be late.”

“You're going to be very late,” he confirmed.

Then he lifted her into his arms and carried her to his bed.

* * *

He'd told her he loved her.

Several days later, Lauryn was still marveling over that fact—and wondering if he'd noticed that she'd never said the words back. Not because she didn't feel the same way, but because she was determined to take their relationship one day at a time. With her ex-husband still in town, his presence an almost-daily reminder of that failed relationship, it seemed wise.

She was putting more hours in at the store again as the community embraced Sports Destination and business continued to pick up. Adam wanted to hire another part-time employee in anticipation of the holiday rush, and she was giddy anticipating that there might actually
be
a holiday rush. In fact, she was so caught up in preparations for the post-Thanksgiving sales she nearly forgot about Thanksgiving itself and might have done so if Ryder hadn't asked about her plans.

“My mom and my aunts play hostess on a rotating schedule for major holidays,” she told him. “I think we're at my Aunt Jane's house this time.”

“Thanksgiving is in five days and you
think
it's at your Aunt Jane's?”

She opened the calendar app on her phone and scrolled to the date, then nodded. “Aunt Jane's at four o'clock.”

“Were you planning to invite me to go with you?” he asked.

“I didn't think you'd be interested in that kind of thing,” she admitted. “And it's usually pretty chaotic. With all of my aunts, uncles and cousins, there will probably be thirty people there.”

“I like people,” he assured her. “And I really like turkey.”

“Then I guess there's no reason you can't come with us,” she decided.

“So why does it sound as if you're looking for a reason?”

“I'm not,” she said. “I'm just wondering what to tell people... How to explain our...situation.”

“Our situation?” he echoed, amused. “I believe it's called a relationship. And one of the basic rules of a relationship is that the people involved usually make an effort to be together on national holidays and other special occasions.”

“That's a rule?” she asked.

He nodded solemnly. “One of the big ones.”

“All right. Would you like to spend Thanksgiving with me and the kids and the rest of my family?”

“I'd love to,” he told her.

“Okay,” she agreed. “But if you get the third degree from my dad and my uncles and half of my cousins, don't say I didn't warn you.”

* * *

Two days before Thanksgiving, Lauryn was in her office with Adam, reviewing purchase orders for the summer retail season, when there was a knock on the open door.

“Hey, Lauryn. Do you have a minute?” Rob asked.

She looked questioningly at her manager.

“I'll go help Bree unpack the shipment that came in yesterday afternoon,” he offered.

“Thank you.” She turned her attention to her ex-husband, waiting for him to tell her why he'd stopped by—because she knew there had to be a reason.

“I talked to Roxi this morning,” he finally said. “She's pregnant.”

Lauryn took a minute to digest the information. “Yours?”

He nodded.

“Congratulations.”

“Thanks.”

“You don't sound very excited,” she noted.

“I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel,” he admitted. “I know I haven't been a very good father to Kylie—or a father at all to Zachary.”

“Maybe the third time's the charm,” she suggested.

“Maybe,” he said a little dubiously.

“How does this affect your plans here?” she asked. Because she really didn't care that he'd knocked up his girlfriend except insofar as it affected her children.