Burned (9 page)

He hadn’t introduced me to
anyone
. Not even his mom. Given the opinion of his family that both he and his sister shared, I realized I really didn’t mind.

“It’s fine. Probably better that way?” I guessed.

He nodded. “Yeah.”

“I understand,” I assured him. “I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have introduced you to my mom either.”

He frowned as he lifted his coffee cup. “Why is that?”

“She’d hit on you.” I stabbed at a bite of waffle.

His eyes widened as he subtly choked on the gulp of coffee he forced down. “No way. She wouldn’t do that.”

“Oh, yes,” I assured him. “She would. She has. And some of the guys I’ve dated are nowhere as hot as you.” My face flamed. “I mean—”

“You mean you
like
me,” he teased. I knew it was payback for last night, when I’d asked him if he liked me in front of his sister.

“Well, obviously,” I said with a wink. “I’m letting you buy me breakfast, aren’t I?”

He laughed. “I guess you are.”

He lifted his coffee mug into the air. I raised my glass of milk, wondering what in the world he was doing.

“To us, and our crazy-ass parents,” he said.

I laughed as we clinked our drinks together. “To us,” I agreed. And hopefully to good things to come.

I glared at my phone, frustrated that it continued to ring. It was my mother. Again. She’d gone to voicemail half a dozen times already. She’d left a message every single time. She would continue to leave messages.

Even worse, she would continue to call.

I swiped it off the kitchen counter. “What?” I demanded.

“Lanna, sweetheart, that’s no way to answer the phone.”

“It is when I’m feeling frustrated because you won’t stop calling,” I grumped.

“I haven’t stopped calling because you haven’t answered. Now, you’ve answered. I’ll stop calling. For awhile. But first,” she said authoritatively, “we need to talk.”

“Do we?” I said dryly. “I’m not so sure there’s much more to say. The last time we spoke you called me a naïve, gullible child.” Perhaps I had been a naïve, gullible child. But I’d needed support from my mother, not a reprimand.

“I’m sorry about that. I would’ve apologized sooner but you’ve made it a bit difficult for me considering that you’ve refused to talk to me.”

I grabbed a dishrag and began to scrub the already spotless counter. She had a point but I didn’t want to admit it. “I’m kind of busy right now. So if that’s all…?”

“Lanna,” she said sternly, “did you hear me? I said I’m sorry.”

“I heard you,” I said as I rinsed the rag out. “I’m just not sure I believe you.”

“Believe me. I mean it. I was upset. I got carried away. It just…it pains me to see someone take advantage of you. To be honest, I took it out on you when I really wanted to take it out on Kyle. Of course, since he’s nowhere to be found, I didn’t have the luxury. I’m sorry for my misplaced anger,” she said softly.

I settled onto a stool at the breakfast bar. My elbows rested on the counter as I kept the phone perched at my ear. She actually sounded like she
meant
it.

“How are you doing?” she asked.

“Good. Great even.” It wasn’t a lie.

“Holly told me you’re working for a real estate agency. I should’ve heard that information from you.”

“In order for you to hear it from me, I would’ve had to have been speaking to you.”

“Indeed.”

When she had called me a gullible child, what I heard was
stupid
. My mother thought I was stupid for getting myself into the mess I’d gotten myself into. Maybe she wasn’t wrong. But taking out her anger on me hadn’t been right either.

I
was the one who had lost…just about everything.

“Listen, Lanna, I really wish you would’ve come home. There’s something I need to discuss with you. I would prefer to do it in person,” she said. “It’s…important. And it affects you, too.”

I wrinkled my brow in confusion. “Weird. That’s the line you always give me when you’re about to divorce my latest step-dad. But you already gave me that line when you told me you were going to divorce Rick. Mom,” I said, feigning shock, “did you get married again without my knowing it? Are you divorcing
another
step-father that I haven’t even met?”

I was met with silence.

I winced.

Maybe I’d gone too far.

She cleared her throat. “I suppose after all I’ve put you through, I deserve that.”

“No,” I said, instantly regretting my snarkiness, “that was uncalled for. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. You have every right to be upset with me.” She sighed. “I only wanted to make your childhood better. I never wanted you to grow up without a father. I tried so hard to replace him.” She was quiet but I didn’t interrupt. Her tone was so serious. I had a hunch that she had something important to say. “I loved your father more than I have ever loved anyone…except you. I’ve finally, after all this time,” she said with an audible sigh, “realized there is no replacing him. There is only moving on from him.”

It sounded so obvious to me…but had she really only just now had this epiphany? I kept my mouth shut, because who was I to judge? I hadn’t been through what she’d been through.

“Now that I’ve realized it, accepted it, I’ve realized something else.”

“What is that?” I asked, my tone quiet and encouraging.

“I love Rick,” she said firmly.

I bit my bottom lip. That realization—it seemed to me—should've come before the
I do-s
.

“Mom,” I said as gently as I could, “I’m not an expert on love but isn’t that the kind of conclusion you come to
before
you walk down the aisle?”

She laughed again and I thought I heard a hint of tears behind it. “One would think. But I’ve done everything backwards all these years. I’ve always thought I could force myself to love someone if I just gave them enough time.”

“So you went through with several marriages hoping to fall in love with your husband.” I rubbed my temple. For a smart woman, this was one of the most asinine things I’d ever heard.

“Well, yes,” she admitted. “I never had much luck falling in love before the wedding. I always hoped that once we were married…things would fall into place.”

“Instead,” I pointed out, “everything always fell apart.”

“I’m afraid it did,” she said sadly.

“So what’s different this time?” To be honest, I was skeptical. After all these years, what could possibly have changed? Her epiphany didn’t sound particularly enlightening to me. It just sounded…crazy.

“Rick. He insisted that we go to marriage counseling. Of course, I fought him on it. But he’s the only man I’ve ever married who is as stubborn as I am. So we went. Eventually, marriage counseling led to just me going to counseling. It’s helped, Lanna. It really has.”

Of all the husbands that she’d had, none, as far as I knew, had ever fought for her. My opinion of Rick escalated a bit.

“What now? Where does this leave the two of you?” I asked.

“He moved back in last weekend. We’re going to continue to go to couples therapy. I know how blasé it all sounds, but I feel that I really have made progress working through all of my issues. I want my marriage to work. For the first time since your father, I
want
this to work. I love him, Lanna. I really do.”

“I’m glad.” I realized I was glad my mother loved her husband. I also realized how bizarre it was to have to come to that realization. It should’ve just been a given.

“I know I haven’t been a very good role model for you.”

I rolled my eyes and refrained from verbally agreeing. No need to hurt her feelings.

Though with her next words, she hurt mine.

“You’ve had such terrible taste in boys. I feel like it’s all my fault.”

“Mom,” I said flatly, “my taste has not been that bad. I’ve made
one
mistake.” Granted, it was a big one, but still.

“None of your relationships have worked out.”

“Mother! None of my relationships have worked out because I’m young. I’m
dating
!”

“But look at what a nice boy Holly found!”

I clamped my teeth down on my bottom lip. Holly
had
found a great guy. I wouldn’t argue that Max was anything other than terrific. But Holly got lucky. Damn lucky. There weren’t a lot of guys out there as great as Max.

But Jake seemed like he could be pretty damn great too.

“You’re right. Max is awesome.”

“Don’t be discouraged. Maybe someday,” she placated.

“Actually, I’m seeing someone now. His name is Jake.” The moment the words were out, I regretted them. I desperately wished this phone call had a rewind button. Speaking of buttons, Mom pushed mine all the time. Too often I blurted out things I wish I hadn’t said. Now, apparently, was one of those times.

“Tell me he doesn’t know about your inheritance.”

“That’s the first thing you want to know about him?” I asked.

She let out a weighty, disappointed sigh. “Lanna! I thought we realized after Marcus and Peter that it was best not to flaunt our finances.”

Marcus and Peter—aka husband number two and husband number three—had been out of my life so long I couldn’t even picture their faces.

“
We
didn’t decide anything,” I said. “I was only, like, what? Five when you left Marcus? Nine when you left Peter?”

“Not the point,” she said curtly. “But I imagine that your redirection of the conversation means that you did tell Jake. Sweetheart, you’re a beautiful girl. There’s no need to try to lure a boy in with your bank account.”

Just once I wish she’d say I was a smart girl. A kind-hearted girl. Hell, I’d settle for a
nice
girl. Because luring a guy in on looks alone seemed just as bad as luring him in with the bank account she mentioned.

Not that I was doing that. Not that I had
ever
done that. Especially not with Jake.

“It’s not like that! His family is wealthy. Really wealthy.” Once again, I wished I’d kept my mouth shut. I realized belatedly that the harder I tried to explain, the deeper the hole I dug myself would be.

“Oh,” she said, her tone instantly morphing into interest instead of reprimand. “The boy has money.”

I squeezed the bridge of my nose. “He did.”

“Did,” she echoed.

“It’s complicated.”

Another sigh. My mother was the sigh master. “It always is.”

“Don’t be like this,” I said. “He’s a great guy.”

“Aren’t they all at first?” she said wryly.

“Actually, no. Not always,” I argued.

“But you thought Kyle was.”

“And we’re back to him again,” I muttered angrily.

“All I’m saying is that it doesn’t sound as if you know this Jake very well. Be careful Lanna. They’re almost always nice boys at first. Remember how you defended Kyle to me? I was right. Sometimes mothers know what they are talking about.”

“Rarely,” I griped.

“Lanna,” she chided. “I’m only trying to help. Be careful. Take it slow. Watch your back. Don’t be so trusting. That’s all I’m asking.”

“Should I run a background check while I’m at it?”

“It probably wouldn’t hurt.” She actually sounded serious. She probably
was
serious.

“No offense, Mom. But I hardly feel obligated to take dating advice from you.”

“Well, you clearly need dating advice from someone!” she scolded.

“Thank you, Mother,” I said brightly, “for reminding me why I don’t often take your phone calls. Have a nice evening.”

I disconnected before she could protest.

I powered my phone down before she could call back.

I set my phone on the counter, as if it were an offensive object.

A knock on the door tugged me out of my angry stupor. For just a blink, I thought it was Jake. Then I realized he’d just been letting himself in. Probably it was Paige stopping by. I’d talked to her briefly, filling her in on the wedding and our trip to the café the next morning.

I pulled the door opened and was surprised to find Clarissa there. She held out a cardboard cup from the café. A straw was poking through the top.

“What is this?”

“It’s a Mango Tango shake. Your favorite, right? That’s what you usually order?” She stared at me a moment as if for clarification, then she went on. “It’s also my way of saying thank you. You were really nice to me the other day.”

I took the shake from her. She was right. It was my favorite. I often made myself one at the end of my shifts at the café. “You didn’t have to do this. It was no big deal.”

“It was to me.”

“Okay then,” I said. “Thank you.” She stood there a moment. “Holly’s not here. Neither is Max.” I offered up in case she was looking for either of them.

“Right. Of course! I should go!” She started to back away.

I suddenly felt rude, assuming she was sticking around for them.

“You don’t have to go.” I motioned toward the beach with my cup. I realized she had a Mango Tango shake of her own. “We can go down to the water to drink these.”

She didn’t hesitate to accept. “Okay!”

I hopped down the front steps and we made our way down to the beach.

“I would die to live here!” she chirped as we walked. “You must love it!”

“I do. I feel pretty spoiled,” I admitted.

“Yeah, Max and Holly are great,” she said.

I made myself comfortable in my favorite chair. It was hot today. The breeze off the ocean felt good. But the sunshine on my skin felt even better. I took a sip of the shake. It was heavenly.

“It must be so nice to have this place to yourself for a few weeks,” Clarissa said. “It’s like being on a permanent vacation.”

“You grew up around here,” I said with a smile. “I thought you’d be used to the ocean.”

“That doesn’t mean I’d ever take it for granted,” she said, gazing out at the water. “Someday I want to live on the beach.” She sighed dreamily.