Business as Usual (Off The Subject) (20 page)

I look up into his face, wanting to kiss him, but fearing I won’t be able to give him anything more.

His hand lifts to my cheek, tucking my black hair behind my ear. “I want to see you again.”

“You will,” I force myself to tease him. “When I come back for my purse.”

He glances inside the lobby. “Maybe I should go in with you. Just in case.”

I shake my head in amazement. “If you had any idea what you’re suggesting, you would turn around and run away as fast as you can.”

An intensity fills his eyes. “I don’t scare off that easily.”

“No, I don’t think you do.”

We continue to stare at each other for several long seconds before I shift my gaze. I’m putting off the inevitable.

“Thanks again, Ben.”

He kisses my forehead, his lips lingering before he pulls back. “I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”

His tenderness is too much for me to resist. I stand on my tiptoes and kiss him. He’s hesitant, as though caught by surprise. I slide a hand up his chest and behind his head and pull his mouth down to mine. One of his arms encircles my back and pulls me close; the other cups my cheek. Carnal need rushes through me, stronger than I’ve ever experienced with anyone, and I’m desperate to feel more of him.

He takes charge, his mouth demanding on mine, and I want to cry out of relief and happiness. He wants this too. He wants me.

Then he lifts his head, his pupils dilated with lust. He tugs on the loose strands of hair around my face. “If you need help with your brother, call me. I’m serious.”

He tugged on my hair. My wig.

Oh God. He has no idea who I am. “Thanks,” I force out, and my shaking finger keys in the code.

He grabs my arm loosely before I can disappear into the lobby. Ordinarily, the move would fill me with anxiety, but instead I have the urge to throw myself at him again. But I’ve deceived him with this stupid thing on my head. What will he say when he finds out the truth? Will he think it’s some horrible trick?

He smiles down at me. “Try to come get your purse tonight.”

I’m not sure how to tell him who I really am, but what I feel with him is worth pursuing. I’ll figure it out. The biggest issue at the moment is how I’ll get out of the apartment, but I’ll move in with Scarlett if need be. Reed’s overprotectiveness is a thing of the past. I offer him a shy smile. “Okay.”

He pulls me into his arms again and kisses me as though tonight is twelve years away instead of twelve hours. When he releases me, a grin spreads across his face and he takes several steps backward. “Until tonight.”

“Tonight.” Without thinking, I touch my fingers to my lips, wondering how I’ll go that long without seeing him. Then I realize the ridiculousness of the thought as I step into the lobby and push the button for the elevator.

I watch him walk back to his car before the elevator doors open and I step inside the empty car. When the doors shut, I pull the wig off my head, my hands full of bobby pins. I try to fluff out the mess pinned to my head as the doors open. I can’t face Reed wearing this thing.

When the elevator reaches our floor, I step out and stare down the hall. Our apartment door looms ahead and I square my shoulders, ready to face the firing squad.

Lexi

When I reach for the door knob, I realize I can’t walk in holding the wig. How am I going to explain that one to Reed? In fact, I have no idea what I even look like. I haven’t looked in a mirror since last night.

Oh, God. What if Ben saw me with smudged mascara or drool crust on my face? In a panic, I reach up to wipe around my mouth and then run my index fingers under my lower eyelashes to wipe off smudges. Thankfully, nothing comes offs. I still have to deal with the wig, though. A fake plant stands in the corner by the hallway window. I stuff the hair piece and pins into the corner behind the pot, vowing never to wear it again. I fluff my real hair with my fingers, knowing it has to be a disaster. Great, when I walk in Reed’s going to assume it’s after-sex hair. I groan. There’s no way this will end well.

Time to suck it up.

I don’t have my keys, so I try the door knob, not surprised to find it locked. I knock on the door, cringing during the three seconds it takes Reed opens the door. His mouth drops open and he sucks in a breath, relief in his eyes. He pulls me into a tight hug. “Oh, my God, Lexi. I was so scared,” his voice breaks.

“I’m okay. I’m fine.” Now I feel like an ass for not calling him as soon as I woke up.

He hugs me for several seconds before pulling away, his hands bracketed on my arms. “What happened?”

I grit my teeth and offer him a tight smile. “I was just being a college student, Reed. Sometimes we hang out at parties all night and drink too much.”

His eyes narrow. “Did you drink too much?”

“Yes, but I—”

“You can’t do that, Lex.” His voice rises in anger. “Do you have any idea of the danger you’re in?”

For one brief moment, I think he somehow knows about Tina. But there’s no way he could. Is he talking in general? Somehow the look of genuine terror on his face tells me no. “What are you talking about?”

He runs a hand through his hair and when he lowers his arm, he looks years older. “Lexi, there are things going on that you don’t know about.”

“No shit, Reed!” I shout, my temper flaring. “Why don’t you start with the woman you’ve been talking to and meeting?”

His eyes widen and he gasps. “How do you know about her?”

I stumble backward and tears sting my eyes. “How could you, Reed?” I start to cry. “How could you cheat on Caroline?”

He shakes his head. “What are you talking about? I would rather face a firing squad than cheat on Caroline. How can you both think so little of me?”

“Then who is she?”

He turns away and shakes his head.

“Reed!”

“I want to keep it to myself for now. I don’t want to involve you two.”

“So you’d rather destroy your relationship with Caroline than tell her the truth?”

Tears fill his eyes and his expression pleads with me to understand.

“Reed, I’m begging you. Tell me what’s going on.”

He reaches for me and pulls me into a hug, his chin resting on top of my head. “Lexi, you can’t disappear on me again. I was scared to death. I called the police to file a missing person’s report, but they said I had to wait twenty-four hours. I would have needed to give them your real name.”

I hadn’t considered that. “You didn’t need to call them at all. I’m a college student, for God’s sake! I’m supposed to stay out all night.”

“Not you, Lexi. Not now of all times.”

This is the second time he’s alluded to some special kind of danger. “Why not now? What’s going on?”

“Lexi…”

And then I know. I know what he would keep secret even at the risk of losing Caroline. I blink, fear washing through me. “Why am I in danger?” He doesn’t answer and I collapse into a chair at the kitchen table. “It’s
him
.”

Reed pulls a chair next to mine. Picking up my hand, he searches my face. “You have to trust me, Lex.”

Tears sting my eyes again and I fight to catch my breath. I refuse to give into panic. “Is he
here
?”

Reed drops my hand and takes my face in his palms. “No, I promise Todd Millhouse is not in Hillsdale. The woman I’ve been meeting with is kind of like a private investigator. She knows where he is at all times. He’s not here.”

“Where is he?”

He wipes the tears from my cheeks and kisses my forehead. “Not here.”

“Reed!” I jerk out of his grasp. “I’m not a child. You have to stop treating me like one. I have a right to know.”

His face hardens. “Lexi, I know I’ve been unfair and unreasonable in my treatment of you. But if you can just bear with me a little while longer—”

I stand. “I have a right to know!”

He looks up at me, his face heavy with exhaustion. “He’s not here, but he might get desperate enough to seek you out. Ms. Pembry thinks he knows where we are.” He sits back in his chair. “The Monroe Foundation’s involvement in the Southern fashion show probably clued him in. The national press coverage was great for the charity, but it didn’t help us stay undercover.”

“This is all my fault.”

He grabs my hand again. “No. It’s
his
fault. He’s the criminal and he got away with it. But now he’s looking for you and you have to lie low.”

I take a deep breath. What have I done? “Why is he looking for me?”

He shakes his head.

“Reed!”

“He thinks you broke the confidentiality agreement.”

That damn confidentiality agreement. When my parents convinced me not to press charges, I signed a statement saying that I would keep what happened a secret forever. I agreed because I had no desire to share my experience with anyone, but I’ve regretted it ever since. “I didn’t! I swear!”

“I know, Lex. I know.” He tugs on my hand. “And for the record, I’m not sorry you pulled the Monroe Foundation in for the fashion show. If you hadn’t, who knows if Caroline and I would have figured things out? But it makes me feel guilty that the very thing I’m grateful for is what’s putting you in danger.”

My nails dig into his hand. “You have to tell Caroline! Why would you keep this from her? Or me? I can handle it, Reed, and so can she.”

He pulls out of my grasp. “I can’t, Lexi. I’m handling it and I don’t want either of you to be complicit.”

Complicit? My heart stutters. “What are you doing?”

“It’s safer if you don’t know.”

“You’re doing something illegal.”

He stands. “Lexi, let it go.”

I jump up and grab his arm. “Reed!”

He gently shakes me off. “Now you know why I was so scared. And now I have to call Ms. Pembry because she has a team of people looking for you. They found your car in the parking lot of Caroline’s old building.” He turns to me and his voice breaks. “Did you go try to find her?”

“No.” I shake my head. “She’s really gone?”

He swallows. “She packed a bag this time.”

“You have to tell her the truth!”

“I don’t want her to know
anything
. If there’s some kind of backlash, the less she knows the better. We’re not married and she would be forced to testify against me. And worst case scenario, if she knows some of it, they won’t believe she doesn’t know all of it and they’ll charge her too.”

I swallow a sob. “Oh, Reed. What are you doing?”

“I’m taking care of you. Just like I promised.” He starts for the hall then stops. “I have to call Ms. Pembry. I’m begging you: Don’t leave the apartment this weekend.”

“Okay,” I say, numb with fear and guilt. How did this turn into such a tangled mess? But as soon as Reed closes his bedroom door, I immediately break my promise and open the front door and rush to the planter to grab my wig. If I’m in real danger, this disguise might be the way to escape notice when I see Ben again.

Because, no matter what, I have to see Ben again.

Ben

I’m watching the damn door at the bar again, but this time my heart feels a lot lighter than it did before.

Lexi’s coming to see me tonight.

Ignoring the fucking fact that seeing her
at all
will endanger my math lab job, I’m ecstatic. Optimistic. Hopeful. Which isn’t like me. Not since Sabrina.

But Lexi is different. Tonight I’ll tell her that I know who she is. I want her to know I don’t care what color her hair is or what nickname she uses.

Britt steps around the bar, thirty minutes late. “Thanks for picking up the slack.”

“You covered for me last night. We’re good. But you’re not usually late.” I look up at her. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah. Of course.” But she doesn’t look at me. “The kids’ dad is watching them tonight, and he was late.”

My mouth drops open. Never in the months I’ve known her has she mentioned their father. “They have a dad?”

She scrunches her nose and snorts. “Of course they have a dad. They weren’t hatched from spores, you idiot.”

I shake my head. “Well, of course they have a father… It’s just…”

She whacks my arm. “Yeah, I know. He’s a lowlife, but he says he had a
come to Jesus
moment and wants to be part of their lives.” She narrows her eyes. “And yeah, I know, it’s not a great sign that he was late.”

I hold up my hands in defense. “Hey, I’m the last person to judge. Especially after what happened with Sabrina.”

She raises her eyebrows in surprise. I don’t usually mention her name. I prefer to pretend she doesn’t exist. Which is impossible, given that my entire life changed because of her.

A customer approaches the bar and Britt takes his order.

I whip around when the door opens again, but my shoulders sag when a couple walks in.

“What’s got you so freaking uptight?” Britt asks, pouring a glass of wine.

She’s going to figure it out soon enough, so I might as well tell her. “Alexa’s coming by.”

She finishes pouring and sets the wine bottle on the bar. “Did you tell her friends your name and number?”

My back stiffens. “No.”

She takes a step closer. “So, you left her a note explaining what happened?”

I hesitate. “No.”

Her eyes narrow as she looks into my face. “Then how do you know she’s coming in tonight?”

“She told me this morning. After I took her home.” I prepare myself for her tongue lashing.

“You told me you were taking her home.”

“I did. You just misunderstood which home.”

She shudders and moves closer. “Fuck, Ben. Do you know what serious shit you could have gotten yourself into?” Her voice lowers. “After your arrest—”

“I know. But I didn’t know what to do. And my roommates were there all night—”

“You were putting them in danger too!” She shakes her head. “Damn it, Ben.”

I take a deep breath and release it, then rest my hands on her shoulders. “I know. You’re right. But Alexa knows what happened. She thanked me for helping her and not calling her brother.” I’ve been thinking about her all day, worried about Reed’s reaction. Why didn’t I think to get her cell number so I could call and check on her? Once she shows up at the bar tonight, she’s not leaving until she gives it to me.