Buzzkill (Pecan Bayou Series) (19 page)

Mark held up his
phone. “He’s not answering.”

Oh God, maybe
he’d been in a car wreck. Maybe he drove over there and the roads were slick
from all the rain and he slid into a ditch where he was now breathing his last
breath clutching our wedding license against his chest. I felt myself starting
to hyperventilate. What if … what if he’d changed his mind? This is the last
best place to pull out of a wedding. What if he decided marrying me was just
too much baggage between having a child and my penchant for getting into
trouble? I couldn’t blame him if he had changed his mind.

“Betsy!” I heard
my father’s voice speaking through my wave of self-doubt.

“Betsy, I’m
talking to you, darlin’.” I felt his hand on my shoulder. “Betsy, I’m going to
drive over and see if I can find him. Do you understand me?” He spoke slowly
making me feel like a DUI getting booking instructions on a Saturday night.

“Betsy?” he
questioned.

“Not without
me,” I uttered through my fog.

“You can’t leave
now, you’re the bride,” Elena said.

I stood up and
yanked up my wagonload of tulle. “Yeah, well I’m no good without a groom. I’m
part of a set. Let’s go.” I started walking toward the door and turned back to
Elena. “Have Myrtle go through her Broadway repertoire. A star is born.”

Elena rushed
into the church to a delighted Myrtle. She would be tickled pink to strut her
showtune stuff.

******

After stuffing
me and my wedding dress into my dad’s cruiser, we sped to the house with the
lights on. Leo’s car was parked in my driveway.

“Why would he
still be here?” I said. “Maybe I didn’t leave it on the desk and he can’t find
it.” I started opening the car door and felt my father’s hand on my arm.

“Wait just a
minute, Betsy. It might be better if I go take a look first.”

That could mean
two scenarios – either my father was worried he was the victim of some sort of
crime, or worse, maybe he’d changed his mind about this whole wedding thing. I
took a deep breath. “Okay, I’ll give you five minutes, and then I’m coming in
after you.”

“Thank you. Just
stay here.” He got out and walked toward the house but didn’t go up the porch
stairs. He looked in our front window and then the window on the other side. He
glanced back at me and motioned for me to continue to stay.

He then went up
the stairs and opened the screen door and then tried the door. “Leo? Are you
all right, son?” He carefully opened the door and looked inside. As he entered
my home, he shut the door behind him.

I sat alone in a
police car, on my wedding day. I watched the clock on the dashboard and began
to count down the minutes. A light rain started leaving traces on the front
windshield, making it harder and harder for me to see. At five minutes exactly,
I opened the car door. Picking up my skirts, I tried to keep the mud from
attaching itself to the hem of the dress. Repeating my father’s approach, I
headed toward the window first. Looking in, I couldn’t see past the sheers. I
walked up the stairs and opened the front door to enter the house. Before I
could get two steps inside, I came face-to-face with my father. He was holding
up Leo, who looked dazed as he gingerly rubbed at the back of his head.

“What happened?”
I said.

“I don’t know. I
walked in to get the marriage license, and something or somebody hit me in the
back of the head.”

I reached up to
the top of his head and felt a knot.

“I’m thinkin’
Leo surprised a burglar,” said my dad. “Your wedding was in the paper. Any good
burglar could have figured out your house might be full of wedding gifts and no
people.”

“Did you get a
look at him?” I asked.

“I wish I had,”
said Leo. “I didn’t see anybody. I didn’t even hear anyone. I did smell
something, but I can’t be sure. But hey,” he said with a crooked grin as he
pulled the marriage license out of his jacket, “we can still get married.”

“Maybe we need
to go to the emergency room instead,” I suggested.

“I’m fine.” He
reached up to the top of his head and winced.

“Betsy, before
we go. Let me just search the house and make sure it’s empty. I need you to
look around and see if anything has been stolen,” my dad said.

I kissed Leo on
the cheek and walked farther into the living room. The TV was there, the video
game console was there, the computer was there. I really didn’t have that much
to steal. I walked over to the computer and saw the pile where the marriage
license had been. Underneath the license I had stacked yesterday’s mail, vowing
to deal with that after the wedding. As I straightened the stack on my desk, I
realized that Morton Fischer’s personal and confidential letter was no longer
in the pile.

Twenty minutes
later, after my house search turned up nothing, we returned to the church and
Leo ran to the front. Lavonne came back to the vestibule and immediately
re-fluffed my dress, which I had miraculously managed to keep the mud off of.
Tyler and Zach, who had been reclining on a set of chairs, stood up and started
straightening their tuxes.

Myrtle was just
finishing up her version of “It’s a Hard Knock Life” from “Annie,” complete
with ad lib choreography, as Leo took his place beside Mark. A hush overtook
the crowd, and then they broke into applause for the appearance of the missing
groom. Myrtle, of course, felt it was for her impromptu performance and began
taking flourishing bows. From the look of relief on Aunt Maggie’s face, Myrtle
could keep her day job.

Leo turned to
the pastor and presented the marriage license to him. Pastor Green patted him
on the back and set it on the pulpit. Myrtle’s accompanist, who had just pumped
out a half hour’s worth of boisterous showtunes, cracked her knuckles and began
to play Trumpet Voluntary. Each one of our sons started down the aisle doing
the slow-time step we had practiced. They held satin pillows with our rings on
them. Danny waved wildly to them from the pew. After that came Elena, and then
it was our turn.

Dad offered me
his arm. “You ready to take this walk, darlin’?”

“As I’ll ever
be,” I said, taking in a deep breath and flipping my veil to the front.

As I crossed the
threshold of the church, the entire crowd turned and stood. Mr. Andre stood at
the far wall motioning for me to smile and stand up straight, coaching me to
the very end. He would probably be upset to find out that Leo and I wouldn’t
need any help with the honeymoon. It seemed that quite a few people had decided
to ignore the curse of the calamine, and I felt tears filling my eyes. This was
Pecan Bayou. This was my family.

Miss Ruby pursed
her red lips and nodded as a tear broke its way past her carefully lined eyes.
Benny from Benny’s Barbecue stood with his arm around his wife, their children
beside them. Stan from NUTV dabbed at his eyes with his embroidered
handkerchief. He had been so busy with a redesign of NUTV that he hadn’t been
around much. I would need to introduce him to Mr. Andre later. Martha stood
uncomfortably next to Lavonne. I wished I had told the ushers not to put them
together because of their water feud, but they seemed to be getting along.

Martha’s roses
perfectly matched the red hearts that hung on the ends of the pews. Danny
clapped and jumped up and down as Aunt Maggie tried to quiet him. Once he was
contained, her eyes met mine, and I could tell her breath was coming in heaps.
The last person my eyes lit on was Zach, who stood quietly holding the pillow
with Leo’s ring on it. This was such a big change for him, and I felt a panic
rise inside me. Would he be all right with a father and a new brother? Was I
thinking of myself first?

Zach broke into
a grin, giving me his blessing. Okay, I could do this.

“Who gives this woman?”
Pastor Green said.

“I do,” my
father answered as he squeezed my arm and then handed me over to Leo.

Leo took my hand
and whispered sweetly into my ear, words I was sure I would always treasure. “I
know who hit me in the head.”

With our
reception now moved to Wilhelm’s party room, we assembled amid the smells of
bratwurst and sauerkraut. Even at short notice, Wilhelm and his wife,
Josephine, had beautifully decorated their banquet room with white hearts hung
over the long tables set amid stained-glass windows. A massive fireplace
greeted us with a roaring fire as the rain outside was now officially a
downpour.

“What an
excellent change of plan,” Leo said, shaking out his umbrella. “I really like
this place.”

“Well, sometimes
you just have to roll with it,” I said, “and this just fell into our laps.”

“How did that
happen?”

“It all had to
do with my mother,” I shouted over the crowd, which was becoming more and more
merry with the addition of a choice of many German beers and Gluhwein, a hot
spiced wine served with cinnamon and orange slices. Next to the wine, Cal had
set up our wedding cake and groom’s cake. There was plenty to ruin anyone’s
diet.

“What did Mr.
Andre think? I doubt Wilhelm is on his approved vendors list.”

“You know, my
rendezvous with all things posh has officially ended.”

“I don’t know
whether to be pleased or insulted,” Leo said.

Martha came in
carrying the floral arrangements that had been set out at the church. Frau
Josephine hurried behind her with a dishcloth to wipe down the dripping pots of
flowers.

“Oh, that
woman!” Martha griped. “I have no idea how someone as mean-spirited as Prissy
Olin ever caught a husband. She is as evil as they come!”

“What happened?”
I asked.

“We barely got
out of there in time before they started spreading sparkly pink stuff all over
the sanctuary.”

“So our red
didn’t exactly fit in?”

“She kicked over
one of your arrangements before I could get to it. I tried to explain how the
wedding ran late, but she wasn’t having it.”

“Whatever,” I
said as I noticed drops of rain on Martha’s shoulder. “Come on in and warm up.
Can we get you something to drink?”

“That would be
great,” she said. “This is the heaviest rainfall I’ve ever seen in February,
especially on top of all the rain we’ve already had. If the bayou has risen,
that’s going to mean Chateau Fischer could be flooded today. Morton told me
they were watching the water levels and praying the rain would stop. So much
for Prissy’s reception.”

“Besides that, I
can’t wait to see what all this rain did to her hair,” Miss Ruby said, not even
bothering to apologize that she had been listening in. “That girl can get her
frizz on, that’s for sure.”

“I can’t tell you
how relieved I am to have all of this over,” I said.

“I can’t tell
you how excited I am to give you your wedding gift,” Leo said.

Aunt Maggie hit
her glass with her spoon, making a tinkling sound. “To my sweet Betsy,” she
announced, “the daughter I never had, and to Leo, the son we welcome into the
family. And now would you grace us with a first dance?” The assembled crowd
politely clapped as Wilhelm stepped forward with an accordion strapped to his
chest.

“For you, Betsy
and Leo, my wife and I will perform the Schützenliesel Polka,” he said. Wilhem
started in on a rousing song that featured his wife hitting a large drum, the
unexpected sound causing the wedding guests to periodically startle in their
seats.

“Do you know how
to polka?” I asked as a boom from the drum hit my ears.

“I know how to
try,” Leo answered.

Ruby lifted her
glass and started rocking it German-style while many of the wedding guests got
up and began doing a polka around the room. My father stayed with Art Rivera at
the bar. I was glad work hadn’t kept Art away this time. To be fair, it was
work that I often had something to do with. When the song ended, Leo and I both
flushed, we returned to our seats for something to drink. As I gasped for
breath I thought the gym in town should cancel aerobics class and just have
Wilhelm play them a polka.

“Betsy!” Danny
said. “Can I kiss the bride, Betsy?” He stood beside me with his date, Melody,
at his side.

I motioned for
Danny to plant a kiss on my cheek and he spoke into my ear, “Mama cried at your
wedding. I don’t cry at weddings, but Mama did. Does this mean you’re going to
have your baby now?”

Leo’s eyes
widened as he looked toward me.

I quickly shut
that thought down, much to his relief. “No, it just means I’m Betsy Fitzpatrick
now.”

“Oh,” he said,
as if that made all the sense in the world. He walked away practicing my new
name with Melody, and then she pulled him on the dance floor. They happily
began stomping out the polka.

Leo bowed his
head and murmured, “You’re sure there’s nothing you want to tell me?”

I leaned toward
him. “You’d be the first to know.”

“I can’t wait.
Speaking of waiting, I also can’t wait to give you your wedding present.”

“What is the big
deal?” I said. “This better be pretty impressive with all the buildup it’s
getting.”

“Oh, trust me.
It is.”

My father came
in, shaking off his coat and handing his Stetson to a waiter.

“No need to
worry darlin’. Just taking care of some business,” he said. He walked over to
Elena and George, his deputies, and spoke briefly to them. He came back and
extended his hand. “Now, may I dance with the bride?”

“Of course,” I
said, taking my father’s hand.

We began doing a
waltz – or technically, a slow polka – as my father spoke. “So, I guess this
means you’re going to be leaving me now. No phone calls to come out and jump
your car, move your couch or even help you with your latest discovery of crime
in Pecan Bayou.”