California Dreaming: Four Contemporary Romances (96 page)

She took another bite of the plum and leaned back to take in the view of the pristine lake and the granite boulders constraining its shape. What would it be like to own a cabin in the Sierras? Somewhere she could retreat when things got to be too much for her?

“What do you think your future will be like?” he asked.

“I’m not sure. I’m not like you—I don’t have every minute of my life planned out to the second.”

“You make that sound like it’s a bad thing.”

She turned to him. “It doesn’t leave much room for spontaneity.” Or for taking a chance on love.

Love? Where had that come from? She was no more ready for a long-term relationship than James had declared he was.

He grinned. “I’m not all
that
rigid. Look at us. Here we are alone in one of the most beautiful spots on earth.” He moved closer to her. “In fact, I’m feeling a little spontaneous right now.”

She widened her eyes as he stared intently at her.
What is he thinking?

James put his hands around her arms and gently pulled her to him.

She could get away. Should get away.

When he lowered his mouth to hers, however, she stayed right where she was.

James was in way over his head.

Mandy tasted delectable. As he explored her mouth with his tongue, his passion rose. He wanted her, and there were so many reasons not to pursue his desire.

Her tentative touch on his waist drove away rational thought, and he lowered her to the blanket. Horizontal, he could feel the heat from her body flame him further. He grew hard with need.

A squirrel scolded them from overhead.

Her blue eyes reflected the sky above them. They held no fear or resistance.

Still, he shouldn’t be doing this. There was no room in his plan for a white picket fence, or what passed for a white picket fence in LA. But he couldn’t seem to stop himself from continuing.

He wanted her. Badly.

He lowered his mouth to hers again and let his right hand wander down her side, thumb brushing the side of her breast, zinging more heat to his groin. He wanted to cup the soft mound, test the rigidity of the small tip, but he had to remember where he was.

There were people around.

Abruptly, he pulled away. He had no right to expose her to the amused observance of strangers.

She moaned. “Why did you stop?”

He motioned behind him. “I’m sure we have an audience.” He sat up.

She pushed up and propped herself up with her hands behind her. The position had the effect of thrusting her breasts out. With her messy hair and swollen lips, she looked like a temptress from a silent film.

He throbbed and closed his eyes.

“Could you sit differently?” he asked.

“What?” She looked down. “Oh.” Her cheeks flamed and she scampered into a cross-legged position.

It was only marginally better.

“Hungry?” she asked.

For you.

What was he doing with her? Nothing good could come of it. He’d suggested hiking for his own selfish reasons. Managing the location for this shoot was stressful. He’d hired an assistant, but while Doug was competent, he was about as friendly to James as a rattlesnake.

Mandy brought out joy, made him feel alive. He wanted to spend time with her, but hiking had been a stupid idea. He didn’t need to be with a woman who, for some reason, was able to seep through his defenses without even trying.

“Well?” She stared at him, her face slightly flushed, lips moist and full.

He nearly groaned, but forced out an answer. “Yes. What did you bring?”

“I went simple. Cheese, bread, salami, olives, celery, and a kamut salad.” She grinned. “Brownies for dessert.”

“How did you get all this? They don’t sell it in the deli and I can’t see Sally letting you raid her stores.”

“The lodge chef and I are becoming quite good friends. He’s cleaning out for the summer and was happy to oblige.” Her grin broadened. “I think he has a crush on me.”

The stab of jealousy surprised him. She was a free agent. She could flirt with whoever she wanted.

Over his dead body.

She laughed as if she knew exactly what he was thinking and began to lay out the food, plates, and forks.

“Looks like you folks are enjoying yourselves.” The older couple they’d met earlier was standing beside them.

Great. Just what he’d been trying to avoid—reviews from critics.

“Don’t be ashamed,” the woman said. “It’s this place. The water and stone make you think your love and lives will go on forever.” Her face saddened as she looked at her husband. “But it doesn’t. Life is over way too early. Enjoy it while you can.”

“See you on the road of life,” the old man said. He gave his wife a tender kiss and they walked hand in hand toward the trail to the upper lake.

James glanced at Mandy to see if she’d been as affected by the brief exchange as he had.

Her face was thoughtful as she gazed after the pair.

“They look one of the lucky couples who made it.” Mandy gestured to the trail the couple had used to leave the area. “Although she seemed sad, for some reason.”

“Maybe he’s ill.”

“Oh. I hadn’t thought about that. I guess she was right—life is short.”

Just like Mateo—a life cut short in the sands of the desert. “Yeah.”

She turned back to him. “What do you want, James?”

He wished he could give her the answer she wanted, the answer she deserved, but even years after Theresa’s betrayal he wasn’t ready to risk his heart again. Besides, there was Ruiz to consider. He wasn’t ready to trust anyone with his decision about his son.

Mandy gazed steadily at him while his mind raced for an answer.

He didn’t have one.

A blank look erased expression from her face, and she lowered her eyelids. Even with her eyes closed she managed to pluck an olive from the container, and place it in her mouth.

He feasted on the movement of her lips, remembering how they’d caressed his a few moments earlier.

After she finished the olive, she looked up at him with a trace of sorrow in her eyes before moving her gaze to the still sky-reflected waters.

“You know,” she began, “Lola and Dana divorced when I was a kid, and I haven’t seen him since. It about broke my heart when he walked out the door. Lola always pretended we were better off without him.” She shrugged and nabbed a piece of salami. “I don’t know. I was too busy dealing with her issues.”

She shifted on the blanket. “I was ready to have a fling with you, but you don’t want that. And you claim you don’t want to have a serious relationship with anyone either. But this?” She gestured to the blanket where they’d lain moments before. “I don’t get this. You can’t make up your mind. I thought I was the only one with that problem. But after seeing that couple, I realize I want to make something more out of my life. It
is
short. What we do needs some meaning, don’t you think?”

The touch of her hand on his was warm. He looked into her eyes and was surprised to see a trace of liquid shimmering on the surface.

Her words knifed through him. She was right. He was telling her to go away, but kept inventing excuses for them to be together.

“You told me you don’t want anything permanent,” she continued. “I can respect that, but you keep kissing me. It’s making me crazy. You make me feel like I’m the only one in your life when you hold me like you just did. So either you mean what you’re saying, or you mean what you’re doing. Which is it?”

He didn’t know what to say. He’d promised himself, and Sally, that he wouldn’t do it, but something happened when he kissed her—something that had never happened with anyone before, including Theresa, a woman he’d thought he loved with all his heart before she’d left him for Mateo.

He picked up a pebble, threw it hard into the lake, and stared at the concentric circles.
I’m screwing this up again.

Mandy was quiet. She took a plate, piled it with delicacies from their feast, and handed it to him. Then she repeated the process for herself.

They ate in uncomfortable silence.

How had he let a day with so much promise skid off the rails so spectacularly?

He tried again to salvage the mood. “I’m sorry.” Women always liked it when men apologized, didn’t they?

“What for?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, usually when someone says they’re sorry, it’s because they’ve done something wrong,” she said. “Is it your life plan that’s wrong or kissing me that’s wrong?”

“Neither.”

“You can’t have it both ways, James.”

Another pebble flew into the water, farther this time. “I don’t want to hurt you, Mandy.”

She drew up her knees, wrapped her arms around them, and stared into the distance. “I want it so badly—the American dream. I want to settle down with someone I love, have kids, and live happily ever after.”

“I want that, too.”

“But on your terms.”

He laughed. “Don’t we all want our lives on our terms?” He put his hand on her arm. “You’re trying to fix your childhood, Mandy. You can’t get a do-over.”

“I don’t want a second childhood. I want to make sure my children don’t have to live with the mess I had to grow up with. I’m looking for a man to guarantee that happens.”

He shook his head. “Life doesn’t work that way anymore, if it ever did. None of us can guarantee permanence. If you try to find a man who says he can always give you what you want, your heart’s desire may come at a big price. If you’re so busy looking for the sunset, you might ride off with the wrong person.”

“Yeah, maybe.” She turned her head and looked at him. “But I don’t think I’m open for a relationship with someone who doesn’t know what he wants, either.”

He knew what was coming next.

“Please stop kissing me. I think we need to keep our distance from now on. We don’t want the same thing.”

She was right.

“Okay.” His agreement seemed to dim the sun’s reflection in the lake.

• • •

The walk down the trail was quieter than the hike to the lake had been. James tried to start a conversation a few times, but Mandy was unresponsive, so he finally left her alone with her own thoughts.

He tried to banish the idea that he’d screwed up royally, but the sense of loss wouldn’t go away, no matter how scenic Yosemite was.

When they reached the camp, Beth Ann was waiting for them. From the look on her face there was trouble in store.

Mandy must have come to the same conclusion. “Thanks for the hike,” she said. “I’ll see you later. I’ve got laundry to do.”

He forced himself not to stare after her.

“What’s up?” he asked Beth Ann when he reached her.

“I’m not sure, but it doesn’t look good. Someone’s been messing with the set. Several critical props are missing—including the storage box. One of the lights is gone. We were going to shoot tomorrow night, but now we can’t until we replace the light. If we can’t find a storage box that looks exactly like the one we already used, we’re going to have to reshoot several scenes.” She glared at him. “Didn’t you have the set secured?”

He mentally ran through his procedures before he answered her. “Everything was in the prop trailer, and I locked the door myself.”

“There’s no lock on it now.”

“Let me get rid of this pack. Then I’ll go over there and see what’s going on. Where’s Doug?”

“Dunno. Haven’t seen him since breakfast. Better order a light and get it up here, too.” She handed him a piece of paper. “This is what’s missing that I know about. You better double check that, too.” She started to turn away, but stopped. “I gave you a chance, James. Don’t blow it. I can’t afford for this shoot to be delayed. My money’s invested in this film, too.”

Shit.

“Right on it.”

As he was getting in his car to drive to the set, George Stubbins pulled up.

“Hi James,” the actor said. “Heard you had a bit of a problem on the set.”

Was it his imagination, or did George seem a little gleeful about the trouble?

“Nothing we can’t handle.”

“I’m sure.” George looked around. “Seen that little caterer around? She sure is a cute one.”

A flare of rage whipped through James’s veins, but he tamped it down before responding. He took a step closer to the man. “She’s my friend. My
good
friend.” He hoped Stubbins got the implied message.

The actor chuckled. “Like that, is it? I won’t poach on your territory. But if you ever get tired, let me know. I’d be happy to let her know how a mature man could treat her.” George tipped his fingers on an imaginary hat, slammed his car door closed, and walked toward the lodge.

Asshole.
If he laid a hand on Mandy …

James let the image tumble into a melee of threats and consequences as he drove out of the lot.

The scene was close to what Beth Ann had described—prop trailer unlocked and open. He knew he’d locked that door last night. Where was the padlock?

Beginning his search on the right-hand side of the trailer, he worked his way several feet into the brush. He was about to give up when he caught a glint of the setting sun on metal. Pushing aside brush, he picked it up.

The trailer lock. It had been clipped, likely by a bolt-cutter.

James stared at it. Why would someone steal a set light, the storage box, and—he checked the list Beth Ann had given him—a blackened coffeepot and tin mugs? The coffeepot and mugs he could easily replace at one of the antique stores that littered the Sierras.

Lights he could only get in LA, close to a five hour drive each way.

Heaven knew where he could get the replacement storage box. He’d have to check with the prop master to find out where it came from.

Whatever it took, James had to make it right. He climbed into the trailer and took an inventory. Nothing else was missing.

He slammed the metal trailer doors and padlocked them with the spare lock he’d brought along in the car. Better order a few more since he was retrieving things from LA. He’d get the best that money could buy. James couldn’t afford to ruin his first shoot. It would derail his career plan.

The thought of his plan brought back the memory of the kiss by the lake. He was a fool. Whether he wanted to admit it or not, he was letting a chance at happiness slip by like a ship in the night.