"I was so busy with my father's funeral arrangements, it never even
occurred to me. It was only on the trip down from Fintry, and
especially when I got to Dublin, that I realized. I had been really
sick on the boat across, you see, but put it down to simple mal de
mer. It was only once I was on dry land and kept getting sick in the
mornings, and then did some mathematical calculations, that I knew
for sure."
Lochlainn sat down on the bed and hugged her to him. "So you were
already on your way back to me?"
She stroked his cheek softly, trying to allay his last doubts and
fears. "Please, Lochlainn, I know we've had a hard time, and the
road we've traveled together has been a rocky one, but please
believe me when I say I love you. Please trust yourself enough to be
secure in our relationship.
"I love you. You make me so happy, I can't even begin to find the
words. I would love any child we had together unreservedly, whether
we're married or not. I hope that any children we may have will
bring us even closer together than we already are. Please, no more
ghosts from the past to haunt us. I want to start all over again,
with no more doubts and misunderstandings."
He sighed and got back into the bed beside her. "Then I have to
confess something as well. I wasn't looking daggers at you when we
first met because I resented you. I was staring at you because I
fell in love with you from the moment I first laid eyes on you. I
hated myself for even thinking of you in that way, with you so young
and innocent and married to my half-brother.
"I deliberately tried to think ill of you," he admitted with a
sigh. "I tried to convince myself that you were a woman of the world
who deserved everything you got for marrying such a dissolute
wretch. But one look at those incredible eyes of yours, and I would
melt. I've been such a fool. I just can't believe my luck, can't be
sure I can trust it or you."
She snuggled against his lean, hard frame. "You can, Lochlainn. I've
told you all there is to know. I love you. Nothing else matters,
nothing, not even Barnakilla. So long as we have each other, what
else do we need?"
"Oh Muireann, I've felt for so long like I've ruined your life,
taken advantage of your predicament, by not having told you the
whole truth. I was the one who had you come to Barnakilla. I've been
so scared that you might one day resent me for that, and for all
we've shared. You've given yourself so generously. Too generously.
I've tried to hold back, to give you your freedom. But the number of
times I just wanted to kiss you, to-"
"You were saying?" Muireann sighed as she stroked him boldly, and
left him struggling for control.
"You little vixen," he purred, rolling her underneath him.
"I don't want my freedom from you, not now, not ever. I love you,
Lochlainn, always."
"And I you, my darling girl. But are you sure, really sure, about
staying here? We've had such dark days with the Famine, the
poverty--"
"But such glorious nights. Really, dearest, I'm sure this is my
home, just as I'm sure of our love for one another," she breathed as
she moved against him seductively. "Can't you feel it too?"
Lochlainn kissed her then, knowing mere words were not enough to
tell her how he felt. Lifting his lips, he vowed, "Wherever you are,
my darling, that's where I belong."
"And wherever you are, that's my home, my dearest love."
Muireann kissed Lochlainn tenderly, an unspoken promise that they
their love would thrive no matter what obstacles Fate put in their
way, and they would never again be parted.
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