Can't Let You Go: A Wheeler Brothers Novel (27 page)

He starts the game and I score right away. He's not paying attention. His eyes keep wandering to my naked body. I score again, and then again.

"Are you going to play or what?" I ask.

He drops his controller. "Fuck it." His hands go to my hips and he pulls me down on the bed.

"But we're not done with the game."

"Fuck the game. I'd rather do this." He lies over me and kisses me.

I break from the kiss and smile at him. "If you forfeit, I win. That means an endless supply of Oreos."

"Whatever you want, it's yours." And then he kisses me again.

That was the easiest win I've ever had.

The next morning, we sleep until ten, which in itself is great because I never get to sleep in. But what's even better is waking up next to Bryce, in his arms, his body wrapped around mine.

I hear him behind me, taking a deep breath and letting it out. "God, this feels good."

"What feels good?" I ask, wanting him to clarify.

"You." He kisses the back of my neck. "You feel so damn good. I just want to stay here all day."

"We should probably get out of bed. We've been here since yesterday afternoon."

"I like it here. I don't want to leave."

"We could go do something, then come back here later."

"What do you want to do?"

"Maybe go to a movie."

"Or we could watch a movie here. In bed."

I flip around and kiss him. "I doubt we'd watch the movie."

"You're probably right."

His phone rings from the nightstand and he checks to see who's calling. "It's Nash. I'll call him later."

"Just go ahead and talk to him. Maybe he needs something."

He sits up as he answers his phone. "Nash, what's up?" He listens, then smiles. "Callie can't stop baking?"

I reach over and press the speaker icon so I can hear what he's saying.

"Her classes were canceled today because of the roads," Nash says. "And for some reason she had this urge to bake. Now we've got cookies and brownies coming out of our ears. She wants to bring some over later."

"Um, I don't know." Bryce glances at me. "We might be busy."

"We?"
Nash asks. "Oh, yeah. I forgot Jen's there. So how's that going?"

"Good. She's right here. She just put you on speaker."

"Hey, Jen. How's living with Bryce?" He chuckles.

"Not too bad." I smile at him.

"So what are you guys up to?"

"We're still in bed." Bryce cringes. "I mean, we just woke up."

Nash is quiet, then says, "So um, maybe Callie and I shouldn't come over."

"Why wouldn't you come over?" Bryce asks, rushing the words out.

"Never mind." I hear the smile in Nash's voice. "How about noon? The roads should be cleared off by then. Will you guys be around?"

"We'll be here," I tell him.

"Then we'll see you soon."

We say goodbye and Bryce sets his phone down. "That's just great. Now he knows about us."

I sit up, facing Bryce. "He doesn't know anything."

"I told him we're in bed. He can figure it out."

"So you're saying you don't want anyone to know?"

"Not yet. It's too soon."

"Too soon because you think this won't last?" I can't hide the hurt in my voice.

"Hey." He sits up and links his hand with mine. "It's not about that. It's about my family. You know what they're like. They've been pressuring us to get together since high school. I want them to stay out of it, at least for now. I don't want to tell them anything until we've had more time together."

I nod, covering myself with the sheet as I look down at the bed. I let go of Bryce's hand.

"Jen, what's wrong?"

I shrug. "I just get the feeling you won't want to continue this after this week. Like it'll end as soon as I move back to my apartment."

"It'll end when we say it ends. It has nothing to do with when you move back."

"So it's going to end eventually."

He takes my hand back, holding it in his. "I don't have a timeline, okay? This just happened. I think it's too soon for either of us to say where this is going to go."

"But you really want to try this? You want to go on dates? Try being a couple?"

"I already told you I did. Actually, it was my idea." He lifts my chin up and I look at him. "Stop trying to analyze this and just go with it."

"Okay."

He grins. "Now let's go have breakfast quick so we can have shower sex before my idiot brother gets here."

So we do. And I try not to think about this ending. But I still have a feeling it will.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Bryce

What the hell have I done? I not only had sex with Jen, multiple times, but I also basically asked her to be my girlfriend. So much for distancing myself from her.

I don't know what happened. It's like I just snapped. Lost any sense of self-control, and let myself be with Jen the way I've wanted to since high school.

I put it all out there. Didn't hold back. I had sex with her, then told her I love her. And God, it felt good to finally say those words. Almost as good as it felt to have sex with her. The sex. Shit, it was better than I've ever had, and it's not just because Jen has a kick-ass body and fits me like a freaking glove. It's also because we know each other so well.

I always worried that'd be a bad thing, like it would make the sex less exciting, too predictable. But that isn't the case at all. Instead, it gives us a deeper connection that makes the sex even better. I can't really explain it other than to say we're completely in sync, which is something I've never experienced with other girls. That's probably why Jen and I can't stop doing it.
 

Now we have to figure out where we go from here. I still think she needs to leave Chicago, but I don't want her to. I never did. And now, after being with her, telling her I love her, I really don't want her to go.

This is why I never wanted us to have sex. Not even once. Because I knew once I'd been with her that way, I wouldn't be able to let her go. And I was right. So now what do I do? Ask her to stay? Even though doing so could mean having her miss out on a great job? And having to deal with her mom for the rest of her life?

I can't do that to her. I'm just going to keep quiet and see what happens. Besides, what she does after graduation is her decision, not mine. And I don't want her making that decision based on me. Because what if we break up? What if she takes some shitty job in Chicago just to be with me and then we don't end up together?

"Bryce, Nash is here," Jen yells from the living room.

I leave the bedroom and go down the short hallway and see Nash and Callie taking their coats off.

"How were the roads?" I ask Nash.

"A sloppy mess. You should see my truck. Looks like I've been off-roadin'."

"But at least it's starting to warm up," Callie says.

"My God, Callie, how long were you baking?" Jen is in the kitchen taking plastic containers out of a cardboard box.

"For hours." She walks over to Jen. "I don't know if I missed working at Lou's bakery or what, but I got baking fever and went crazy. We already brought a box to Mitch and Austin. It was even more filled up than yours."

"I told her she should have a bake sale to get rid of it," Nash says to me. "You should see how much we still have at home."

"I'll give some to the neighbors," Callie says. "And we still have to bring a box to Jake and Ivy, so we won't have much left."

Jen and Callie talk in the kitchen while Nash and I go to the living room.

"Oh, I forgot," Nash says. "Dad said you're doing estimates for some new jobs. I brought over the template we use, but I left it in the truck. I'll go get it."

"I'll go with you." I need to find out if Nash knows about Jen and me, then tell him to keep quiet about it.

"We'll be right back," I say to Jen. She nods and waves us on as she talks to Callie.

Nash and I grab our coats and go downstairs.

"So you and Jen." He chuckles. "About time."

I nod, unable to hide my smile. "How'd you know?"

"You were acting weird on the phone. That was my first clue. Then it was confirmed when you said you guys were still in bed. Neither one of you would still be in bed at that hour unless you were um...doing things other than sleeping. Shit, I can't talk about this. Jen's like my sister, and talking about this feels wrong."

"So don't talk about it." We're at his truck now and he reaches between the seats and takes out a clipboard with papers on it. "I mean it, Nash. Don't tell anyone about this, not even Dad."

He shuts the door and we head back inside. "Why don't you want him to know?"

"Because he'll make too big a deal of it. He's wanted this for so long, he'd probably throw us a damn party."

We stop in the lobby so we can talk.

"Dad wouldn't do that. He'd give you guys space. He only pressures you about Jen because he knows you love her and he wants you to be happy. We all do. And we all know you'd be happy being with Jen. So are you?"

I grin. "Yeah."

He chuckles. "I can tell. You're gonna have trouble hiding this from the family if you keep grinning like that."

"I can't help it. I mean, Jen's always made me happy, but now, I don't know, it's different."

"Because you're not having to hide your feelings. Did you tell her you love her?"

"Yeah. And she said it back."

"Guess it's good the heat in her apartment broke or this might've never happened. It took living with her for you to finally break down and tell her how you feel. And it's good timing because I have a feeling she was going to take a job out of town if you hadn't made a move."

"She still might."

"Might what? Move?"

"Yeah. She's looking for jobs all over the country."

"Even now? With you two together?"

"We haven't talked about it, but just because we're dating doesn't mean she can't get a job outside Chicago."

"What are you saying? You'd be willing to move?"

I shake my head. "I wouldn't go with her."

"What do you mean you wouldn't go with her? How are you supposed to date if you're not with her? That long distance shit never works."

"We just wouldn't date. We'd have to break up." I get a painful burn deep in my chest just saying that. It's not what I want but I also don't want her stuck here with her mom.

A couple people walk past us and Nash grips my arm and pushes me toward the door. "Go outside. Get in my truck."

"Why? Where are we going?"

"Nowhere." He walks in front of me in the parking lot.

"Then what are we doing?"

"I'm talking and you're listening. Now get your ass in the truck." He opens the driver's side and gets in.

So he's going to give me a lecture. Great. Just what I need.

I climb into the passenger side. "I don't want to hear it, Nash. This is between Jen and me."

"I'm not letting you fuck this up. You and Jen have wanted this for years and now you're finally together and I'm not going to stand by and let you fuck it up."

"I'm not fucking it up. We've dated for one day."

"And you're already talking about breaking up with her." He shoves my shoulder. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"I'd only break up with her if I had to, like if she moved away."

"If you're together, she's not going to move away. She won't even consider a job somewhere else."

"Which is exactly what I don't want her to do. She shouldn't be making a decision like that based on me. Jen has worked her ass for this degree and I want her to get a good job and have a good future."

"She can have that in Chicago."

"She said there's a lot of competition here. She's not sure if she'll be able to get a job, so I'm not going to hold her back and tell her she has to stay."

"She needs to at least know that's what you want. Don't make her guess. It's not fair to her. I agree it's her decision to stay or go, but she needs all the facts in order to make that decision."

"If I tell her I want her to stay, she'll stay. She won't even consider leaving."

"Then she stays and you're both happy. Problem solved."

"It's not that simple."

"Actually it is. Jobs come and go. But finding the person you're meant to be with only happens once. You and Jen have found each other so don't be stupid and let her go."

I sigh. "Are we done yet?"

"You gonna promise me you won't do anything stupid?"

"I don't know what's going to happen."

"Then I'll tell you." He grips my shoulder and looks me in the eye. "You're going to tell Jen exactly how you feel and what you want, then you're going to let her make the decision. And if she decides to go, you're going to fight for her. You're going to do everything possible to convince her to stay. Because I guarantee, if she decides to leave, it's not because she wants to. It's because you fucked up and didn't make it clear to her how much you love her."

"She already knows I love her."

"As a friend. But does she know you love her in a way you'll never love anyone else? Does she know you'd do anything to have a future with her?"

I swallow. "No."

"So tell her that. Don't hold back. You don't have time to. This is serious, Bryce. She's making big decisions right now and she needs to know you want a future with her."

"You really think that's what's best for her? To be with me? A construction worker?"

"What the fuck's that supposed to mean?" he asks, anger in his voice.

"Jen's going to be an accountant, working at some big company surrounded by people with college degrees. She needs to be with someone like that, not someone like me."

"Fuck." He slams his hand on the steering wheel, then shifts in his seat to face me. "Don't you EVER put down what we do. Just because we don't sit in an office all day crunching numbers doesn't make us any less important than those idiots in their high-rise buildings downtown Chicago. People like us are the ones who built those damn buildings. Those guys in their suits wouldn't have their fancy offices if it weren't for us. And as for their fancy degrees?" He huffs. "Great. They can hang a diploma on their wall. Big fucking deal. That doesn't make them any better than us. They may wear expensive suits and drive around in expensive cars but I bet you anything Dad made more money than they did last year. Hell, he's been making well over six figures for years. Without a damn degree."