Captivated by You (3 page)

“Mocking? Never.” He grabbed her hands, tugging them away from her face. She looked up at him, caught sight of his sparkling eyes, and allowed herself to drown in them. “As if I would ever mock you. You just make me smile. That’s all. It reminds me of how life used to be. How simple things were with you, studying math and talking about what we wanted to be when we grew up. I was happy back then.”

There was a haunting emptiness to his words as he fidgeted with his glass.

“So, it’s not what you expected?” she asked, her voice quiet.

Mark looked up at her through his lashes, his eyes locked on her. “I enjoy my career. I enjoy acting. But … sometimes I wish I had picked a different one.”

She shook her head. “Why would you want to give up your Hollywood lifestyle? You wear it well.”

“Well, maybe I wouldn’t give up everything.” He pushed the glass away and picked up the
People Magazine
. He stopped at a page where his picture was plastered across it. “See this? That day I was sick. Felt like shit and dragged my feverish ass out of bed to get my prescription filled.”

She leaned closer and looked at the picture. “You look happy to me. Of course, you’re wearing sunglasses so I can’t see your eyes, but you look content enough.”

“Yeah, because I have to look that way. If the paparazzi take a picture of me with a red nose and puffy eyes—next day they’ll be calling me a drug addict. Saying I was out all night partying and snorting lines of cocaine. Next thing you know, my publicist is making me enter rehab for exhaustion.”

“That sucks.” She pulled the magazine out of his hand and tossed it face down on the table. “Well, how about this? Relax. You don’t have to be charming. Don’t have to pretend to want to rip my clothes off to keep your sex status symbol. Just be you. I promise I won’t tell anyone if you un-tuck your shirt and kick back for a bit.”

He bit back a smile. “You think I’m pretending I want to rip your clothes off to appear sexy?”

“No, of course not!” She bit her tongue, inwardly cursing herself for her choice of words. Way to make it sound like she thought he wanted to get into her bed.
Idiot
. “How come you latched onto that one part about sex out of the whole speech I just gave you? It’s such a typical man thing.”

He lifted a shoulder. “It’s ingrained. We can’t help it.”

She rubbed her temples and sighed.

He leaned in closer to her, his eyes latched on her mouth. “What if I want to rip off your clothes and have sex with you?”

She poured herself another glass and ignored the clenching of her stomach. “Nothing wrong with wanting.”

“Tease,” he uttered, grabbing her hands again. Why did he keep doing that? What was he up to tonight?

“Me? Never.”

His laughter melted away. His gaze dropped back down to her mouth and his fingers flexed on her hands. When he moved in closer, her breath caught in her throat. Was he going to kiss her? She tilted her chin up and her eyelids drifted shut. Waiting. Hoping.

Instead of getting the kiss she expected, she got her hands back in her lap, and he jumped to his feet. Of course he hadn’t been thinking of kissing her. She’d obviously imagined the whole thing, and now he was trying to get away from her. What happened to the promise she’d made to herself not to throw herself at him?

Fool.

Here she went again, trying to kiss the poor guy when he so clearly didn’t want to be kissed … by her. Why couldn’t she resist him? What chance did she, a teacher from a small town, have against Hollywood A-list actresses? He didn’t want her. Wouldn’t ever want her. They were friends—if she could even call what they had between them “friendship.” After all, he’d left for California and she’d never heard from him again. If he hadn’t broken down outside of her house, she wouldn’t be seeing him now, either. When would she get that through her thick, thick skull?

She finally opened her eyes and bit down hard on her lip, watching him pace in front of her. He nibbled on his thumbnail, his steps wide and hurried. He must be praying for the tow truck to hurry up and come get him before she threw herself at him again. Not looking at her, he asked, “So, what have you been up to besides work? When’s the last time you saw Eve?”

“Um, a few weeks ago. And I’m not up to much besides work.” She paused, seeing where this conversation was going. Knowing Eve, he knew all about Joe and his infidelity. “How much do you know about my engagement?”

He stopped mid-pace, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. “Truthfully? Everything. He sounds like a royal fuckwad.”

“Yeah, he was. Is.”

She ignored the slice of pain knifing through her heart. She didn’t really miss Joe, per se, but she missed having someone in her life that cared about her. Missed having a person to come home to and eat dinner with. She’d had that with Joe, and thought she’d spend the rest of her life with him. Start a family. She’d been wrong.

“How’s work?” he asked, pouring them more champagne. Her head was already spinning, but she took it from him anyway, thankful for the change of subject.

“It’s good. I love being a teacher.” She stole a look at him to see if he looked bored silly, but he watched her as intently as before. “Actually, I got an award last spring for teacher of the year. I’m the youngest to ever be crowned—so it was a pretty big deal. Not as big of a deal as winning a People’s Choice Award, of course, but fun nonetheless.”

“Are you kidding me?” He smiled at her. “That’s amazing, and much more impressive than an award for being cute on screen.”

She snorted. “You’re kidding, right?”

“Absolutely not.” He stood up and tugged her to her feet. “Show it to me. Where is it?”

She blinked at him, unable to believe he could be so excited about a plastic trophy. Why was he acting so interested in her life when his own was a million times more exciting? And, unfortunately, his excitement in her success made her melt toward him more—as if she needed help in
that
department. To see him so excited about it made her long to throw her arms around him and kiss him senseless. Again.

Six months earlier, she hadn’t had anyone in her life that could even pretend to be excited about her award—besides her parents and Eve. Joe had recently broken her heart and she’d been alone and miserable. For weeks afterward, she’d moped around, feeling lost and confused. When they called her name over the microphone, and she’d stumbled up to the stage in surprise, the cloud following over her head had dissipated. After winning the award, she’d gone home and set it in a place of honor right in the middle of the fireplace mantle. That small little token of appreciation had been the highlight of her year.

Forcing her attention back to the present, she shrugged. “It’s not here. It’s over at my place. I don’t live here anymore, remember?”

He flushed. “Well, I want to see it sometime.”

“If you want to see my little trophy, you’ll have to come back to visit.” She motioned toward the door. “Perhaps when it’s not snowing so you can avoid ditches?”

“It’s a date.”

She froze. She knew he didn’t mean the word in a literal sense, but it didn’t stop her heart from skipping a beat or two.

He gave a small shake of his head. “Normal is a good thing—not something to bemoan. You should embrace the privacy. I miss it.”

“If you say so,” she mumbled. She sat back down, feeling awkward standing in the middle of the room. “Did you really punch that photographer in the nuts for snapping a picture of Pink’s baby?”

He shrugged and shoved his hands into his pockets. “He made the poor little thing cry, and refused to back up when Pink asked him to. What did he expect?”

“Is she nice?” She leaned forward and tapped her foot. “I’ve always wanted to meet her. When I saw you were friends with her and her husband, I died of jealousy a little bit.”

“She’s great. They’re both great.” He ran a hand over his jaw, his eyes guarded. “You can come visit me sometime if you want, and I’ll introduce you.”

She nodded. “Yeah. Sure.”

“Good. I can’t wait to show you the glamorous Hollywood life. You’ll enjoy it, I think.”

“I bet.” But knew she would never see him again after tomorrow. He was here with her now, so it was easy to make empty plans and promises, but once he returned to the life of an A-lister, he would forget all about her. Again. Time for a dose of reality. She’d ask the one question she’d avoided up until now. “So what hot Hollywood star are you dating now? I promise not to tell.”

Something crossed his eyes, something that looked an awful lot like uncertainty when combined with his wrinkled brow, but he shook his head. “I’m single.”

She wagged a finger at him. “I don’t think you are. I saw that look in your eyes. Oh god. Is it someone normal? An agent? Publicist? Your accountant’s niece?”

“No, there’s no one. And besides, I wouldn’t date a normal girl.”

She drew back, insulted despite her own thoughts on the subject matching up with his words. “Why not? Normal isn’t good enough for you anymore?”

“The opposite, actually. I can’t date anyone without dragging her into the spotlight, and completely changing her life in the process.”

“If she agrees to date you, then I’d have to assume she’s prepared for that.”

“Maybe too much so. A lot of the women I meet want to date one of the characters I’ve played—not the real me. Or they want my money.” He stopped pacing and looked at her, his jaw hard. “Or, in some cases, they wanna use me to get famous. I’ve stopped dating because of this. None of them really know me. Or
want
to know me.”

She pursed her lips. She’d never thought of the hardships of being a star before. To her, it seemed all glamour and money. “Oh.”

“Sometimes, I long for normal. Boring.”

She put her hands on her hips and narrowed her eyes at him. “Are you calling my life boring?”

“No, of course not. I’d never associate you with the word
boring
in a million years.” He sighed and rubbed his jaw. “And I’m not unhappy with my career choices, or anything. But sometimes I wish …”

“For love?” she asked softly, unable to believe he was telling her this. “Anonymity? Happiness?”

When they were kids, they would spend hours sharing their deepest thoughts and wishes, but their long conversations had taken place lifetimes ago. Eons ago. Never would she expect him to be so open now, with so much lost time between them.

He flushed. “Yeah. Maybe.”

“I get that. I’ve never thought of the other side of the business before.” She lifted her hands then dropped them back in her lap. “I mean … I’m sure women are always throwing themselves at you. It can’t be that lonely.”

“Oh, they do throw themselves at me. But not the right kind,’” he murmured, his eyes on her. “Not the right one.”

She nibbled on her lip and turned away. “It can’t be easy for a regular woman to attract your attention. I would imagine a normal woman would be scared you wouldn’t even see her mixed in with all of those actresses and models.”

“Well, then …” He stepped closer to her by an inch or so, yet she felt his heat urging her to lean in. To sway toward him. “She would be wrong. I’m not into actresses.”

He couldn’t possibly mean that she was the right type of person, or that she should let him know she wanted him. The champagne was messing with her head. And yet … right now, it looked as if he wanted her. Wanted to kiss her.

“I’m sure the right woman will come along someday,” she managed to say.

“What if she already came along?” He kneeled down at her feet. “Do you ever worry maybe the one you were meant to spend your life with is already gone? Like maybe you missed your chance because you weren’t ready then?”

“Sometimes, yes,” she admitted, picturing him laughing at her across the lunch table at school. She looked down at her lap, clasping her hands together. “But for now, I’m content as I am.”

“I want you to be happy, not to settle for some asshole because he seems good enough. You deserve more.”

She would not swoon at his words, nor would she read more into them than she should. “What about you? Don’t you have some young, hot actress expecting your arm for the red carpet tomorrow night?”

“I do have an event, yes, but I’m kind of stuck here at the moment.”

There it was again. The painful reminder that he was only here because he needed a tow. “Right.”

He plucked her glass out of her hand. “Are you sure you’re not seeing anyone?”

She squared her jaw. “Are you?”

“No. It gets too messy, remember?”

He let go of her legs and tucked her hair behind her ear. The touch seemed more intimate than before, and her body begged for more with a steady tensing of her muscles. What was he doing? “Right.”

How many times in the past three minutes had she said
right
?

“Now answer my question.”

“I already did, you idiot.” She tilted her chin up, meeting his eyes defiantly. “No, I’m not seeing anyone.”

“Good. Because I’ve wanted to do this since you opened the door.”

He lowered his head and closed his mouth over hers. She gasped in shock, unable to believe the same man she had been half in love since senior year was kissing her. He took advantage of her open mouth, slipping his tongue in between her lips, and she forgot to think at all.

Chapter Three

Mark slid his tongue inside her sweet mouth, unable to resist the temptation of her lush lips any longer. He pulled her closer, but kept his touch on her arms light, in case she wished to pull away. When she snuggled closer and entwined her hands behind his neck, he groaned and deepened the kiss. Ever since he’d walked into this house, he’d wondered if she tasted as good as he’d dreamed she might, but she tasted a million times better.

He trailed his fingers down her bare arms, tracing the curve of her wrist lightly before gripping her hips and pulling her closer. He knew he should pull away and apologize for touching her, but he needed a few more minutes of heaven before he stopped. He lived halfway across the country, and she would never want to deal with the crazy lifestyle he was buried neck-deep in, so he knew this was a one-time thing. A mere taste of what could’ve been, if he hadn’t run to California all of those years ago.