Carthage (40 page)

Officer, why’re you detaining us? We did not break any law! Seems like, you are harassing us. I was a sergeant in the New York State National Guard, Officer. I was deployed to Iraq February 2003 to July 2004.

State trooper interrupted it don’t matter any God-damn who’s been in the National Guard or in the U.S. military, he’s asking them a question
right now
.

So Sabbath said quick and eager, Sir, we’re going to visit a good friend in Miami. We’re looking to get there tomorrow if nothing goes wrong.

Yeh? Who’s this “friend”?

Her name is Drina . . .

Girlfriend
eh? You goin to visit a
girlfriend?

And so like this. The officer had more questions to ask of them like dragging a fine-tooth comb through their snarly hair and laughing at them but Haley McSwain had quieted, some.

It was good that Sabbath had spoken up, Haley would say later.

It was what her sister would have done, in her place. Haley was certain.

Finally, the state trooper let them go. Fifteen minutes harassing them at the side of the road and traffic rushing past at seventy miles an hour. Sneering and frowning saying OK girls, lettin you girls off with a warning, see. Get that taillight looked-to and drive at the speed limit, see? And watch that
weaving.

In the cab of the pickup then as the cruiser pulled away Sabbath glanced sidelong at Haley shocked to see that her companion was hiding her face in her hands and it seemed to Sabbath that her lips were moving and just-audible was a whisper
Oh Christ fuckin Christ have mercy.

SO NEXT DAY
stopping outside Fort Pierce at a 7-Eleven. And Haley is high-strung and edgy and still talking about how Sabbath saved them from a ticket, or worse, the night before. But talking fast and excitable so Sabbath has a premonition that something is wrong, or might soon become wrong. And in the 7-Eleven there’s a man smirking at Haley, trying to talk with Haley, following Haley outside to the pickup where Sabbath is waiting. And somehow it happens, when Haley opens the driver’s door he’s crowded close behind her, and leaning inside so she can’t close the door; and he’s calling them
girls
like the state trooper called them
girls
the night before; and without a word Haley reaches beneath the driver’s seat for the tire iron she keeps there, swings it and strikes the man on his shoulder, not hard enough to break the bone but when he falls screaming she swings again this time striking him on his knee with a resounding
crack!
and he’s on the pavement like a puppet whose strings have been cut and Haley has slammed shut the door, turned the key in the ignition and backed the pickup around and out of the 7-Eleven parking lot like a Nascar racer.

Laughing deep in her throat. You see the look in that fucker’s face?

Seconds later, they’re back on I-75 South. Signs for
WEST PALM BEACH, FORT LAUDERDALE, MIAMI.

Eighteen months then Sabbath McSwain lived with Haley McSwain and a shifting company of (mostly women) friends in rented bungalows, mobile homes, and apartments in the Miami area. And following this, several years in Hollywood, Fort Lauderdale, Miami (again), and North Miami Beach. As the women in Haley’s life were ever-shifting so too the places in which they lived and the jobs at which they worked—in Miami for instance Haley drove a FedEx delivery van, and Sabbath worked in a succession of fast-food restaurants; in Hollywood, Haley was a security guard at a shopping mall, and Sabbath worked in a pizzeria at the mall; in Fort Lauderdale and North Miami Beach, Haley worked for UPS, driving a van and as a dispatcher, and Sabbath worked at whatever employment she could find—always, Sabbath’s employment was temporary, until Haley announced to her they were moving.

Gettin restless, eh? Me, too!

It had turned out to be, as Haley had surmised, that her friend-from-the-army Drina Perrino was involved with another person. But it had not turned out, initially, that Drina was likely to switch her feelings to Haley McSwain, as Haley had believed.

This other person—
Opa Han.

So many times over a duration of years Sabbath would hear the name
Opa Han
yet just once had she caught a glimpse of this person as she and Haley crouched together in the cab of the Dodge pickup in a drizzling rain outside the bungalow in which Drina and Opa lived in North Miami Beach—a female figure of no striking distinction except her hair was jet-black, straight to her shoulders, and her shoulders were wide, and sloping.
Opa Han, Drina Perrino
.

Only “just friends” but Haley and Drina saw each other frequently and Sabbath was often in their company, as Haley’s
kid sister livin with me for a while.
Drina Perrino had been a surprise to Sabbath for Haley had spoken of her obsessively as a
beautiful radiant blessed
individual but in fact Drina was short-tempered and peevish, with plucked eyebrows, a dissatisfied little beet-colored mouth, glittery piercings and studs in her ears, left nostril, and right eyebrow; a round little heavyset woman with thick arms, thick legs, sizable breasts and hips, and a girlish moon-face; “not an ounce of fat” (as Haley marveled) but defiantly firm-fleshed, like a rubber doll. Drina dressed flamboyantly in tight-fitting clothes that outlined her breasts, hips, and belly; her hair was alternately dyed and bleached—chestnut-red, platinum-blond. She rubbed rouge on her cheeks for a bright, febrile look; she made up her “Egyptian eyes” (as Haley described them) with inky-black mascara and green eye shadow; she wore cascades of flashy, cheap jewelry, and high-heeled shoes. Drina was several years older than Haley McSwain but looked younger than Haley whose plain earnest coarse-grained face was coming to be crisscrossed with worry lines (“worry over you-know-who” as Haley joked); though she did not resemble a soldier now, she’d once been a private first-class in the U.S. Army from Hazard, West Virginia. In some earlier life, Drina had been married, and divorced; as Haley McSwain waited patiently for Drina to tire of Opa Han, and turn to her, so it was hinted—(Haley herself joked about this, but Sabbath could not think it a laughing matter)—that Drina’s ex-husband, still a resident of Hazard, entertained a hope of Drina returning to him, too.

Drina exuded an air of glamour, set beside Haley’s sobriety. She’d trained to work as a beautician in the upscale specialties “cosmetology” and “electrolysis” but her employment was sporadic in Miami and South Beach. It seemed—(so Haley surmised, but was too proud to inquire)—that Opa Han, a forty-year-old radiologist at Miami-Dade County Hospital, was supporting Drina much of the time.

Somethin I could do just as well, Haley said. Or better.

She’d give me a chance, I would show her.

Sabbath worried: Haley would do something reckless, dangerous to impress Drina Perrino. To get the attention of a person like Drina you couldn’t be just
you.

Like one evening, Haley turned up with a heavy urn filled with red roses, for Drina.

Wouldn’t say but Sabbath had the strong suspicion that Haley had appropriated the urn and the roses from a cemetery or riskier yet, a funeral home.

So excited, had to climb into the pickup and drive a half hour through congested traffic to get to Drina’s place in North Miami Beach and even then, Drina was slow to come to the door, stared and blinked at Haley looming over her—(Haley was at least eight inches taller than Drina)—as if almost she’d never seen Haley before; took the urn and roses from her with a muttered “Thanks!” and a brush of her beet-colored lips against Haley’s cheek but didn’t invite Haley inside. (Of course, Opa Han was there. They’d seen Opa Han’s shiny little red Volkswagen Beetle at the curb.)

Next week is Drina’s birthday, Haley explained. I want to be the first one givin her a present.

Sabbath disliked Drina for how Drina treated Haley. But Sabbath felt a little thrill of excitement at the prospect of seeing Drina, as others did. Drina was a kind of
ferment.

For one thing, Sabbath never knew what sort of mood Drina would be in. First time they’d seen each other, and Haley so anxious for them to like each other, Drina had been aloof and sarcastic as if she’d been jealous of Haley’s “sister”; but other times, Drina treated Sabbath as if she was in fact Haley’s younger sister, and so “family.”

What made Drina an edgy person was, Drina was always passing judgment.

Maybe it was a beautician kind of eye—not content with what
is
but how it could be
different, improved.

Sabbath overheard murmured exchanges—Drina’s petulant voice
Why’s she always with you? Why’s she so clingy? Don’t she have anybody except her big sister to hang with?
and Haley protesting
Sabbath is all my family, right now. That has survived.

Drina wasn’t the only woman-friend in Haley’s life, though Drina was
the
woman-friend in Haley’s life. Other women—Lisha, Luce, Jen-Jen, Zanne, “M”—figured in Haley’s emotions less excruciatingly, yet still Haley felt obliged to lend them money, or invite them to stay with her; less frequently, in difficulties with her own landlord, Haley was invited to move in with one of them. (Of course, Sabbath moved with her. Haley was her “protector” as she’d promised.) At first Sabbath made no effort to remember the women’s names though the women themselves were quite distinct; by degrees, she came to know them, as they came to know her—
Sabbath McSwain. Haley’s younger sister who had some kind of accident—or medical condition—like brain damage not visible to the eye.

(Sabbath wondered was this true? She knew—she had a suspicion—that in others’ eyes she
wasn’t quite right
. Long ago she’d been diagnosed as [maybe] “autistic”—or somewhere on the “autism spectrum.” Not shyness but resistance to looking at another’s face, meeting another’s eyes. Not hearing impaired but just
not hearing
which is a way of
not caring
.)

Except when Haley went away for a day or two—or more—a week, ten days—in the thrall of a new person who might/might not be introduced to Sabbath eventually—she and Sabbath were always together. Never would Sabbath forget her gratitude to the woman who’d rescued her, nursed her, brought her back to life.

It was a matter of food. “Nurturing.”

Haley was determined to bring Sabbath’s weight “more back to normal” and so Haley was in charge of meals, and saw to it that her young companion ate everything placed before her.

Proteins, carbohydrates, fats, calcium. The more intransigent greens, kale and chard.

And at least one bowl of ice cream a day. If Sabbath’s stomach reacted queasily to the high-sugar content of ice cream or to a memory of what once
ice cream
might have meant to her as a child Haley said sternly this is
medicine.

Haley loved ice cream. A dozen flavors were Haley’s favorites. So they ate together, before bed.

Separate beds in which they slept, had always slept and would always sleep. Except on nights when Sabbath could not sleep her limbs twisted in nightmares and her brain racing berserk and self-hurting like a vehicle plummeting into a concrete wall when Haley would wrap her in a blanket and hold her in her lanky hard-muscled arms murmuring
Hey it’s all right. It’s gonna be OK. Whoever it was, they are far away now. Never gonna hurt Sabbath no more now. OK?

In the months they lived together or shared a common household with others Haley was always bringing home “strays”—cats, dogs, even a pair of part-bald African gray parrots abandoned beside a pile of trash at a curb. Bedraggled and limping, eyes swollen shut, scars, oozing sores, eczema, fits of trembling. Haley McSwain was the one, everyone joked about Haley McSwain the Good Samaritan but Haley took such responsibilities seriously. To Haley there were no actual accidents or coincidences in life and so it meant something that a lost or abandoned creature crossed her path, for this seemed to mean that the creature had been set in motion to cross Haley McSwain’s path at a certain predetermined point of time. Jesus Christ was a human man, but a man who stood on his toes to stretch and reach higher. Least we can do.

Haley didn’t trust the ordinary scales in her possession and so she took Sabbath every two weeks to the Miami Cancer Center to have her weighed and examined by a friend who was a “tech” at the Center: this friend, a young Filipino woman named Luce, took Sabbath’s temperature and blood pressure and administered antibiotics if it looked as if Sabbath had some sort of infection—for Sabbath was susceptible to sore throats and respiratory ailments. Luce hoped to return to nursing school to become a fully-licensed nurse and in the meantime took pleasure in helping her dear friend Haley who was known for her generosity, kindness, and Christian heart.

In the Center cafeteria Luce and Haley fussed over Sabbath, urging her to eat. For often, Sabbath had little appetite. Though smiling, trying to smile to please her friends. Yet distracted, as if what remained of her battered mind were
elsewhere.