Changing Fate [Fate series] (18 page)

"Don't you ever think it might be a good thing to leave here?” Akila probed.

"No,” Briam said positively. “I couldn't leave the Queen."

"You go out hunting."

"For a little while at a time, but that's different. I don't leave the land."

"The land?"

"The land of which I am King. I can't leave the land, and I won't leave the Queen. And why should I? Don't you like her?” he asked curiously. “I thought you did; everybody likes her."

Oh, no, Akila thought. He's bewitched. Maybe we all are, because he's right; everybody does like the Queen. Even Druscilla seems to like her as a person, she just doesn't like the Sacrifice—and I like the Queen very much, in spite of knowing that she plans to kill my brother, which doesn't make sense—unless I'm bewitched, too. “Do you plan to stay here the rest of your life, then?"

"Yes, of course I do!” Briam was thoroughly exasperated. “What on earth is the matter with you these days? We have a home again, a beautiful one, good food, lovely clothes, people who appreciate us—I should think, after the way Father always complained about what you had done every time he came home, that you'd be
happy
to have people like what you do for them! Is this really the time to try to analyze the meaning of life? Can't you ever stop worrying?"

Akila forced herself to smile at him. It didn't feel at all convincing to her, but Briam seemed satisfied. “Maybe not, it seems I've been a worrier all my life."

"Well, try to stop it,” Briam advised. “I'll see you at dinner.” He patted her shoulder and strode off in the direction of the rooms he shared with the Queen. Akila sighed and headed toward the back garden to think. Predictably enough, Wolf chose to go with her.

Alone in the garden, except for Wolf, who promptly crawled under the bench she was sitting on, she gave herself over to serious thought. Briam was happy enough now, but she didn't think he truly wanted to be sacrificed. He was certainly fond enough of the Queen that her plans for him would come as a dreadful shock, and he wasn't a good enough actor to hide it when he found out—assuming that Akila could ever get him to believe her. He certainly wasn't listening to her now—before he married the Queen he might have noticed that something was bothering her. Therefore, Akila realized, she couldn't tell him until she was able to get him out of the city—with or without his cooperation.

She would have to take his place at the Sacrifice, that was the only way out of this mess that she could see, but if she was at the Sacrifice, somebody else would have to take care of Briam. And she'd have to have a good excuse for Akila to be elsewhere if she was going to be Briam; she couldn't be both of them at once. She was going to have to have help.

She considered the degree of help available to her. For rigging the Sacrifice—and perhaps kidnapping the Year-King—it was virtually nil. Obviously the palace servants would be useless for this, although they were certainly around her all day, ready to do whatever household tasks she assigned, advise her as to how things were traditionally done when she asked for advice ...
Now that I think of it
, Akila realized,
the only time there's not at least one servant or guard within earshot, if not in sight, is when I'm alone in my room at night—and then Wolf is with me. The closest thing I get to privacy is when I come here to sit in the garden and look out at the river, and I'd bet that if I screamed, there would be a guard out here before the echoes died out. And the household duties I'm nominally responsible for seem to increase each week. I wonder if the Queen is doing this deliberately, to make sure that I'm busy, watched, and staying out of trouble. That could make changing places with Briam even harder.

Briam was obviously going to be no help; Akila only hoped he wouldn't be too much of a hindrance when he found out the truth. So who could she get to help her save him?

The Queen had a full schedule: leading public prayers morning and evening, sitting in judgment, reading correspondence from all over her realm, planning for the upcoming Mid-Summer Festival (if she had started any planning for the Sacrifice, she wasn't involving Akila in it), and doing whatever it was she did alone in her private chapel for two hours every afternoon. And while she certainly seemed fond enough of Briam, she wasn't likely to try to save him.

Forcing herself to look at the matter from the Queen's point of view, Akila conceded that there was no reason for her even to think of trying to save Briam. He didn't have lands or responsibilities elsewhere, he had no family save Akila, he didn't have any particular plans for the future ... in fact, he was virtually perfect as a Year-King. He was young, healthy, and good-looking (suitable for fathering a child), not given to worrying about the future—in fact, he resembled nothing so much as a farm animal being fattened for the slaughter, which was probably, Akila realized with a shudder, just how the Queen viewed him. She treated him kindly, and as for his coming demise, well, all men die sometime, and there are worse deaths.

The same objections applied to the Shield-Bearer. Although she had known Briam before he became Year-King, it had been too briefly for her to have any feeling for him as a person, a special and unique individual. Living in this culture, she probably didn't get too attached to men anyway; she probably regarded the death of the annual sacrifice the way some men regarded losing several wives in childbirth.

Druscilla, however, had seen Briam as a person, and probably would help if she could. But as long as she was four day's travel away, the help she could give would be limited. If there were only some way to get her back to court! I have to at least talk to her again, Akila thought. She's the only one who knows how Lord Ranulf survived.

Putting that thought into words, however, made her realize its obvious fallacy. If the Year-King who survived was in fact Lord Ranulf, which seemed almost certain, there was one person who knew even better than Druscilla how he had survived. I can see it now, Akila thought to herself. I fly back home, land on the battlements—assuming I don't get shot as I come in—change back to human form, find some clothes—hopefully before anyone sees me wandering around naked—go to Lord Ranulf and say ‘my brother's been chosen as Year-King and I want to save him—tell me how you survived being sacrificed'!

Maybe he would help, maybe ... but he might just as easily say that this is Briam's fate, or that if Briam can't save himself, he should die, or worse—he might come here and tell the Queen what I'm planning, and if she even suspects, I don't have a chance! And if she had a son by him, he may still love her.

Aren't you forgetting something? He wants to marry you.

He wants my father's estates—

He
has
those—

...and he wants me to bear him children.

I wonder where his son is. He wasn't with Lord Ranulf when he invaded, and he doesn't seem to be here...?

I wonder that, too. I'll ask Druscilla, when I get a chance.

Yes, you'd better make a chance to talk to her. You could fly there some night—it's a long way by road, but you could fly there and back before dawn if you pushed it.

True, but then Druscilla would know for certain what I am—and I don't think she's ready for that. Haven't you noticed the things she's been careful not to ask me?

Yes, I have. But you had better think of something soon—I don't think you can come up with a workable plan at the last minute. You're going to need help, and time to prepare.

Akila went to dinner still mulling over plans. After asking her for the third time to pass the salt, Wesia was moved to comment on it. “You're rather moody these days, Akila. Are you with child?"

Akila regarded her in astonishment, but Briam jumped to his feet, eating knife in hand, and advanced on the swordswoman. “How dare you? My sister is a proper maiden, not some sluttish servant wench!"

Wesia disarmed him without even rising from her chair. “Sit down, boy."

"My lord,” the Queen said softly, as Briam picked up his knife from the floor and sank back into his seat, still glaring, “the Shield-Bearer meant no offense. Why would it be so dreadful if Akila were with child?"

"She can't have a child without a husband!” Briam protested, as if stating some natural law.

"Why not?” Wesia looked amused.

"I am not with child,” Akila announced firmly, “and I have no immediate plans in that direction.” Time for a quick change of subject. “Did you say that you brought in a deer today, Briam?"

Briam nodded, and the Queen said quickly, “Wonderful! Venison for dinner tomorrow, Akila?” Akila assented, relieved that the Queen had picked up her lead.

"In that case,” the Shield-Bearer said, “I'll wait until the next morning before I take the border patrol out. I do love venison."

"You're going away?” Akila asked, secretly delighted. Wesia often seemed to be everywhere at once, and she was a hard person to deceive. “For how long?"

"Depends on how things are in the border country. A few weeks, probably.” She smiled across the table at the Queen. “I'll be back for the Mid-Summer Festival—with all the people coming for that, we'll need most of the guards here. You can send if you need me sooner—I'll leave a few guards here to look after things and run messages."

The Queen nodded. “I'm sure we'll be all right here. Akila is being a great help with the preparations for the Festival. It's easy to forget she hasn't lived here all her life.” She smiled at Akila, and Akila smiled back. It really was nice to have one's efforts noticed and appreciated.

But Akila saw the troubled look Wesia gave the Queen, and she thought she could almost hear her think, “but she hasn't, and you'd best remember it."

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A few days after the Shield-Bearer left, the Queen was taken ill. She came down to breakfast after the morning prayers on the balcony, took one look at the food on the table, pressed a hand to her mouth, and fled the room.

Akila and Briam exchanged concerned looks, then Akila said, “You sit at the head of the table and start eating, so everyone can eat breakfast; I'll go see what's wrong."

"All right,” Briam said. “I'm no help when people are sick, anyway."

Akila was not surprised to find the Queen in her bedroom, throwing up into the wash basin. She twisted the Queen's hair, which had come loose, out of the way, and held it clear until the spasm subsided, then dampened a cloth to wipe her face. The Queen thanked her in a faint voice, then collapsed on her bed, startling Wolf, who had followed Akila upstairs and then taken refuge under the bed.

"Don't worry, child,” she said. “I'll be fine after I lie still for a while.” Her right hand slid protectively to her abdomen.

"I may not be with child,” Akila said, “but it certainly looks as though you are."

"Yes,” the Queen said with satisfaction, “the Goddess has seen fit to send me a daughter."

"Can you really tell?” Akila asked, “or is it just that you want a daughter?"

"Both,” the Queen replied, breathing slowly and carefully. “I want a daughter, and I know that I carry one. I knew before, when the baby was a son; as soon as I knew I was bearing I knew it was a boy."

"I didn't know you had a child,” Akila said. “Where is he now?"

"He's with his father,” the Queen replied. “He comes to visit sometimes, although,” she chuckled, “I think the boy's fonder of the Shield-Bearer than he is of me. Last time he was here, he followed her about like a puppy—or a wolf."

Akila laughed, looking down at the tips of four paws, which were all that stuck out from under the bed. “Did he crawl under the nearest piece of furniture at every opportunity, too?"

"No, he's not a bit shy.” The Queen reached out, snagged an extra pillow, and propped herself up a bit more. “I'll do now, Akila, you go and eat your own breakfast. No need for both of us to starve."

"But you have to eat
something
,” Akila protested, “especially if you're with child. If I have the kitchen send you some weak ale and dry bread, can you keep that down?"

"I can try. I'll stay in bed until it's time to start the morning petition hearings, that will give me a chance to digest at least some of it. I can read the correspondence later; I should feel better in the afternoon."

"Fine,” Akila said, “I'll send you a tray.” She paused, “Are you likely to get better soon, or are you one of the women who's sick for the entire term?"

"It's hard to say.” The Queen frowned. “I don't get with child easily; last time was nine years ago. I had a bad time of it then, but the circumstances were different.” She shrugged. “Things will go as the Goddess wills."

"True enough,” Akila replied, and went off to the kitchens.
But there's nothing that says we can't ask the Goddess for the outcome we desire
. Then it hit her,
I'm going to be an aunt! What fun! I love babies, and now I'll have one of my own kindred to play with.

If the Queen lets you anywhere near it once she finds out what you're plotting.

She may not find out. Besides, she obviously knows that Lord Ranulf survives, and it doesn't seem to upset her—she's even letting him raise her son.

And you might wind up helping raise her daughter—she may not survive this birth.

No!
Akila felt shocked and horrified at the thought.
She can't die; she's much too alive for that. Besides, she survived last time.

Nine years ago—and she admits she was very sick then.

We'll just have to take extra care of her then. I don't want her to die. I love her
. The realization startled Akila.
I don't want to lose her. Now I understand why Briam can't even consider leaving her. Do you suppose I feel like this because Briam's my twin?

Probably. So take good care of her—if you don't, Wesia will undoubtedly kill you—and concentrate on how you're going to get Briam out of here before he can be sacrificed, even if he refuses to go.

I think Druscilla will help there. I really do need to talk to her
. Akila entered the Hall. Everyone had finished eating by now, Briam had gone off somewhere, and the servants were taking down the tables and starting to set up for the morning's hearing. Akila grabbed a hunk of bread and an apple and went off to the garden to eat, with wolf still at her heels.