Chasing Butterflies (22 page)

Being inside her
again had been a mistake. She had my head so twisted up in knots, I didn’t know north from south. As much as I wanted to claim her, I had to do right by my son first. I wouldn’t repeat the mistake of our parents.

Mom had loved Dad fiercely. And I think he may have loved her once too. But my brother and I had come along and tied them together forever in a binding he eventually resented. I couldn’t jump into something with Lenny too fast until I got my shit right.

The townhouse we lived in had been built in recent years with students in mind. The upstairs held four bedrooms and one bath. There was also a full bathroom downstairs. It was rarely used. Still, Lenny was right. There wasn’t enough room for Mason to have his own space.

I’d left Lenny in my room to put Mason down for a nap. Sawyer came into the main living area, and I signaled for him to give me a minute.

“What’s up?”

His dad had gotten the place and worked out the details for all of us to pay rent. It wasn’t a problem for Ashton because his family had money too. But for Chance and I, who were on scholarship, our rent came through the school. Living off campus had to be approved by the powers that be at the university.

“Do you know what’s required to get an apartment?”

Sawyer narrowed his eyes at me. “Are you leaving so soon?”

I shrugged. “I need to find a place for Lenny and Mason.”

His head tipped up in understanding. “She and the kid can stay here.”

He’d said it so casually, like it wasn’t a problem in the slightest. As much as I appreciated the offer, I explained about Lenny’s stubbornness. “Fine, we’ll empty the office, putting everything in the garage, and they can stay there.”

There was a room off the back that currently held two desks and chairs. I wasn’t sure how often it was used. So it could work. But he really needed to think about this first.

“That would mean no more late night parties.” He shrugged. Again, I could have hugged him for how cool he was being. For all his no care attitude, he had more of a heart than he let on. “You would do that?”

“I won’t be able to use the garage, but it’s cool. The kid is fun, and we know that asshole will get out of jail eventually. She’s safer here.”

When Lenny came downstairs, Sawyer proudly announced, “You’re moving in.”

“I can’t,” she argued.

“Ah, but you can. And here’s why.”

He laid it out for her about safety in numbers. In the end, she said, “Thank you. And it will only be temporary. I’ll find a job and a place of my own.”

“Sure,” he said and winked at me. “Now, go get your shit before that asshole makes bail. Ashton and I will clean out the room before you get back.”

Brie came over to watch Mason while I drove Lenny back to her place. When we pulled up, she put her hand on mine.

“Your friends are—”

“Great.”

She nodded. “If we stay that means you don’t have to give up your scholarship.”

We were back on that subject.

“For now.” I had plans, though, a lot of them.

“Kelley, promise me. Otherwise, I’ll go back home to my parents before I let you give up your dreams for us.”

“They’re my dreams. And maybe I never thought I’d be a father. But I am. And I’ve never felt more inspired to do the right thing until now.”

I got out of the truck and helped her out as she sat looking at the door to the apartment house.

“What if he’s here?”

“Then I’ll have an excuse to kick his ass if he touches you.”

She nodded, and I put my hand at the small of her back. She was so tiny in that moment as she slowly made her way to the door. I wanted to kiss her, but it was too soon. I’d let things go too far last night because our emotions were raw. And it had been as good as it was the first time. It hadn’t been my imagination. She’d been the only girl I’d wanted more from after the deed. And that still held true.

Inside, the place was nicer than it looked from the outside. I hadn’t paid attention the first time. And I was treated to the knowledge that Ox could take care of my family better than me. A while later, she turned in my direction.

“Do you ever talk to your dad?” she asked, making conversation.

I paused from stuffing Mason’s clothes in a suitcase.

“Nope. I haven’t seen him since he left Pam years ago.”

“What is she like?”

I let the air out of my lungs and felt a smile form.

“She’s great. Almost as great as my mom. She was there for all my games. She worked nights, but made me breakfast every morning. She encouraged me when I wanted to give up. I stopped wondering when the next hit would come or when we would move. I was
safe
.”

The word nearly choked me up. I hadn’t thought about how much she changed my life.

Once I started, I couldn’t seem to stop. “She was like my mother, hardworking and strong. Her only rule for me was to stay out of trouble. She forged Dad’s signature on things so I could stay in school and graduate. She was my lifesaver, and I owe her everything.”

“She sounds amazing.”

“She is. And I should call her and tell her about Mason. She’ll probably drive here so she can meet him.”

“She should. I can’t wait to meet her myself.”

I had questions too, but I didn’t exactly want to know how Ox had been a father to my son the last couple of years. He’d probably been there when he was born. They probably had pictures. I felt the anger stirring inside me. I wasn’t mad at Lenny or even Ox. I was mad at myself. If I hadn’t lost my temper that day, Dad might not have moved us out of the state. Though even I knew better than that. Dad would have gotten kicked out of that woman’s house. But maybe not before I found out I was going to be a father. Then I could have found a way to stay.

“What’s wrong?” Lenny asked.

I met her eyes. “I just wish I had known.”

Silently, she came over and took my hands in hers. “It wasn’t your fault. It was my parents and Ox and Debbie. If any of them had done something different, you might have known sooner.”

She rolled to her tiptoes and brushed her lips against mine. I wanted to kiss her back, but I wanted out of that place sooner.

“We should hurry,” I said, pulling back.

I watched disappointment cover her face. She didn’t know it, but she wasn’t ready for a relationship. How could she be?

“And, Lenny?”

“Yes,” she said, her lashes fluttering in anticipation.

“We can’t start anything. I won’t be your…” I snapped my fingers as if that would conjure the word I was thinking of. “Rebound. Yeah, that’s what you girls call it. I won’t be your rebound guy. I’m here for you. But we can’t be together. Not yet.”

She nodded before turning and giving me her back. As we worked to pack up all her things, I thought I heard her crying. But every time I saw her face, her eyes were dry. She claimed they didn’t have much, but we made over a dozen trips between the apartment and the truck to bring everything out.

It took the rest of the afternoon and evening to get them settled in. We ended up driving into one of the bigger small towns to a Walmart to get a futon and a toddler’s bed for them to sleep on. Thank goodness for my truck.

When they were settled, I was more at peace for the first time in what felt like years.

It wouldn’t be until the middle of the following week before the guys came to get me from my room to tell me it was time.

The gleam in their eyes said they were just as pleased as I was for what we were about to do. I knocked on the downstairs room that had become Lenny’s.

She opened the door dressed for bed. Her legs looked appetizing in her sleep shorts. Even though her breasts were hidden beneath her shirt, they were firmly in my memory. I swallowed.

“We’re going out for a while. You’ll have the house to yourself,” I said, trying to get my thoughts back on track.

“Where are you going?”

“We’re not together, Len. I don’t answer to you about my comings and goings. Neither do you. This is just courtesy so you’re not alarmed if you went looking for one of us and found that no one was here.”

She bit her lip, and I swear my dick jumped in my pants. I wanted so badly to kiss her, but we needed more time apart. I had to focus on getting to know my son and making sure he was safe before I would start anything with his mother. I didn’t want him to see us together and then apart if it didn’t work out.

“Keep the doors locked.”

She nodded, and it took a herculean effort not to toss her over my shoulder and fuck the shit out of her. My dick wasn’t happy, but my conscious was clear. I had something to do tonight. And it would take God himself to stop me from what I was about to do.

Mason was asleep
on the tiny bed that was still too big for him. I cradled my phone to my ear, wondering when it would be cut off considering it was in Ox’s name.

“So what are you going to do?” Brie asked.

Brie had wanted in for so long and when she proved herself by coming to me in my time of need, I finally gave in. Not every girl out there was Debbie. And Brie was trustworthy. She hadn’t told anyone about my son. It wasn’t a total secret as it wasn’t anyone’s business.

“He hasn’t touched me since…” I blathered the whole story to her in tears. It was a good thing Mason slept like the dead. He hadn’t stirred through all my sobbing.

“Do you want him back?”

“Of course I do. But he made it clear there was nothing between us.”

Brie huffed into the phone. “Do I need to come over there? That guy has it bad for you. Maybe he just wants to take things slow.”

“I’ve waited four years. I don’t want slow.”

“Then you know what you need to do,” she said.

We ended the call, and I got dressed, or rather undressed. I had to leave some clothes on in case I ran into the guys, but I would make it easy for Kelley to get to my important parts effortlessly.

After finding and setting up the baby monitor, I was halfway to the stairs when my phone rang. It was late, so I figured the only person calling me would be Brie.

“Don’t worry, I’m on my way to his room right now.”

“Whose room?”

The deep voice shocked me stupid for a second. It took a few seconds to register who was on the phone.

“Mr. Prescott?”

“Yes, Lenora.”

I veered from the stairs and sank deep into the couch. Humiliation flamed in my cheeks.

“I’m calling on behalf of my son.”

“Figures,” I said out loud and covered my mouth when I realized I’d done that.

“I’m sure you can imagine how heartsick my wife and I are. We are very sorry about what our son did.”

“So you believe he did it.”

“The detectives showed us your picture. We are hoping you would drop the charges since part of this is your fault.”

“My fault?” I practically yelled and then glanced down at the baby monitor. Mason’s gentle breathing didn’t change tempo. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“He was upset about finding out Mason isn’t his.”

I sat there slack-jawed for a second. “He’s always known that.”

“Then why did he allow you to put his name on the birth certificate?”

“His name isn’t on it if any of you had bothered to ask. And besides, he knows damn well he wasn’t the father considering we hadn’t had sex when I got pregnant.”

Okay, so I made myself out to sound like a whore, but I didn’t care.

“So my son helped you out. That’s got to count for something. Do you even know who the father is?”

Of course he would go there. He should have put his wife on the phone. She wouldn’t have said something so blatantly stupid to someone who was holding most of the cards.

“You know what? Your son is a liar, but that doesn’t make me a slut. You want to know the truth? The truth is I caught your son having sex with my best friend on my birthday. If not for that, I might not have taken that next step with someone else. And Kelley was my first and only until your son offered to help me out with my problem.”

“Is that the guy you’re staying with?”

“That’s none of your business,” I spat. “If you’re here that means your son is out. And I have to worry about my safety because even if you don’t want to believe, this isn’t the first time he’s hit me. But I’m damn sure it’s just the last. I’m tired of paying for his help by enduring his wrath.”

“I can assure you he won’t harm you.”

“How can you? He’s done it for two years.”

“Lenora, I’m begging you to drop the charges. We are willing to compensate you. And my wife is bereft at the thought of never seeing Mason again. Even if he’s not our blood, we love him as if he were our grandchild.”

I closed my eyes. They hadn’t ever been horrible to me. In fact, they worshiped the ground Mason walked on. “I have to think about it.”

“That’s all we can ask. And for what it’s worth, we’re sorry this happened.”

He hung up, and I sat on the sofa curled into myself. The tank top and shorts I wore didn’t help the sudden chill I felt.

When my phone rang again, I jumped. “Hello.”

“Lenora Wells?”

“Yes, this is her.”

“Hi, this is Greg, Shelly’s brother.”

“Oh, yes.”

“I wanted to let you know that Odin Prescott has been released.” That wasn’t news thanks to the call from his father. “You should know that a condition of his release was that he shouldn’t get within fifty feet of you, on purpose that is. He does attend the same school. But if he sees you, he should go the other direction. If you feel threaten by him, give the station a call, and he will be picked up.”

Not having anyone else who may know how to advise me, I said, “His father called me actually a few minutes ago.”

“He did? I imagine they want to settle this out of court.”

“Yes, they want me to drop the charges.”

“I can’t tell you what to do, but I can say that my experience with domestic violence is that the person doesn’t change, not without consequences.”

“They offered me a settlement.”

“I’m not a lawyer like my father. But I can tell you that you don’t have to drop the charges in order to sue them in civil court. It won’t be easy, but you have options. I’ll get Shell to talk to you. She’s the future lawyer in the family. And who knows, my dad has a soft spot. He might be willing to take you on as a client pro bono. But you have to talk to him.”

“Thanks,” I said before we hung up.

It was strange that a girl I thought was my rival might turn out to be the helping hand I needed.

When my phone rang for a third time, I muttered, “You’ve got to be kidding me,” to the air.

I read the display and put the phone to my ear. “Mom.”

“Lenora, we heard.”

Ox’s parents must have called them because I hadn’t. I didn’t hate my parents, I just didn’t respect them. Everything they’d done indirectly had screwed my life.

When I didn’t respond she said, “You have to know your father and I are sick over this. But maybe you should consider the Prescotts’ offer. Think of your son.”

“Or maybe you and Dad are thinking of yourselves. If not for you guys pressuring me to date him, none of this would have ever happened. Even though I would do it all over again to have Mason.”

“You have to know both your father and I love you.”

“I know, but your love has ruined my life.”

“Lenora.”

“I need you to tell me the truth.”

“Okay.”

“Did a guy other than Ox call the house for me over the past years?” She said nothing and the silence was my answer. “Did he send me a letter you never gave me?”

“You have to understand. Your father was understandably upset when he found out you were pregnant.”

“I haven’t forgotten. I had to live with the Prescotts until Dad let me come home. That’s something I won’t ever forget.”

She sighed. “Your father was only mollified that your trouble came from a respectable boy in the community.”

I rolled my eyes, wishing she could see I wasn’t buying the bullshit.

“The way the boy begged to talk to you, I guessed he was most likely the father. He was the boy you’d been tutoring, the one who drove you home after you spent the night away.” She paused, waiting for an answer, but I gave her none. “It was easy to put it together that he’d been the father. Your dad not understanding how a woman’s body worked didn’t put it together. But I did. The math worked. Plus, even if Odin had taken responsibility, I knew you barely tolerated him. But he had money and could give you a good life. That other boy, hell, he even called collect a few times. He couldn’t offer you anything. I couldn’t let him destroy your life.”

“And boy what a good life I had, Mother. I want you to send me the letter.”

“I don’t know—”

“Find it. I have to go.”

“Lenor—”

But I hung up. She may have meant well, but that didn’t mean it was right. I tried not to be angry, but I certainly didn’t feel the least bit sexy anymore. Instead, I felt drained of every drop of good will and humor. I felt like an M&M with no chocolate, naked and hollow and alone.