Cheap Shot (6 page)

“Surely you’re not talking about your
wedding,” Andrea said, fixing her baby with a stony glare. “I know you have
better sense than to think your father and I would allow that.”

Sela knew her sister had been playing with
fire when she’d extended the invitation to Jaxon, but it wasn’t until she saw
the color creeping up Andrea’s neck that she realized Kiki may have ignited an
inferno that would destroy them all.

“This is not up for debate, Mama.” Kiki
seemed unaffected by her mother’s reaction. “I’ve already asked, and Jaxon said
yes. End of story.”

“That’s what you think,” Andrea said, her
breath coming in short gasps. “Wait ‘til your father hears about this. He’ll
have no part of it.”

“Maybe now you know how I felt when you
invited cousin Roy to be the M.C. at our reception without asking me and Chad
first.”

Sela should have known including Jaxon was
Kiki’s way of getting back at her parents for something. Her sister always had
an angle.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Andrea said,
reaching for her sparkling water. “He’s family, not to mention an up-and-coming
politician. He knows how to entertain a crowd. He was the logical choice.”

Kiki narrowed her eyes. “According to you
and Daddy. Did it ever occur to you that Chad and I might want to choose our
own Master of Ceremonies? That maybe we would have asked one of our friends,
someone who actually knows us as a couple? The only time we ever see Roy is at
weddings and funerals. The last time we saw him, he called Chad Carl.”

Sela laughed before pinching her lips
together when her mother scowled at her.

“So he’s not very good with names,” Andrea
said. “That doesn’t mean he won’t do a good job.”

Kiki tapped her bright pink nails on the
table. “If you want Roy, I get Jaxon. It’s only fair.”

Sela had to admire Kiki for standing up to
their parents. They’d been trying to control every aspect of their daughters’
lives for far too long.

“Did you ever think to ask your sister how
she feels about this?” Andrea gestured toward Sela. “That man broke her heart,
in case you’ve forgotten.”

“Of course I haven’t forgotten,” Kiki said,
frowning when she looked at Sela. “Anyone who hurts my sister is automatically
public enemy number one in my books.”

“If that were true, you wouldn’t be trying
to cause trouble for Sela,” Andrea said. “She’s found a man who makes her
happy. Why can’t you be happy for her instead of trying to throw that awful
man
back into the mix?”

The way Andrea referred to Jaxon made Sela
realize that if they hadn’t been in public, her mother would have found another
word to describe her ex.

“Kiki didn’t do anything wrong,” Sela said.
Her kid sister deserved the wedding of her dreams, and if that meant including
Jaxon, Sela wouldn’t stand in her way. “She has a right to invite anyone she
wants to her wedding. It’s her decision, Mother. We just have to respect that.”

Andrea hated when Sela called her Mother, which
she only did when she was annoyed with her. “How does Sheldon feel about this?
I can’t imagine he’s okay with it.”

“Sheldon is a mature man. He realizes this
is Chad and Kiki’s decision, not his.” Truth be told, Sela wasn’t certain her
boyfriend would care one way or the other.

Andrea looked from one daughter to the
other before releasing an exasperated sigh. “I don’t know what’s wrong with you
girls. Your father and I have done everything in our power to lead you down the
right path and try to protect you when you go astray, yet you fight us at every
turn.”

Sela knew her parents loved them, but they
sometimes had a funny way of showing it. She suspected they cared more about
keeping up appearances than whether their daughters were content. “I loved Jaxon.
If he felt the same way about me, I’d like to believe we’d still be together.”

“Why?” Andrea asked, her expression pained.
“He’s crude and abrasive, probably from spending so much time with all those
athletes. Not to mention his family history.” She shuddered. “God punishes
people who take matters into their own hands the way his father did.”

Her mother sat in the front pew every
Sunday, acting holier than thou, but that was more about the need for propriety
than faith. Andrea had been mortified when she’d learned the circumstances
surrounding Jaxon’s father’s death, and she’d tried to convince Sela Jaxon was
likely cut from the same cloth.

“I don’t want to discuss that with you,”
Sela warned. “I regret even telling you about that. I thought if you knew what
Jaxon had been through, you’d be more compassionate toward him, but you
couldn’t cut him any slack, could you? Even knowing what he’d been through?”

“I’m a mother first and foremost,” Andrea
said. “My job is to protect my children, and when I see them setting themselves
up for hurt or disappointment, it’s my job to do something about it.” She
reached for Kiki and Sela’s hands. “You don’t understand this now, girls, but
you will when you have babies of your own to protect.”

“But dating him was my decision to make,”
Sela said, withdrawing her hand from her mother’s grasp. Andrea’s heart was
usually in the right place, but forgiving or forgetting the way her parents had
treated Jaxon, especially since they considered Chad the son they’d always
wanted, was difficult for Sela. “I wanted to be with Jaxon. I loved him. Maybe
if you hadn’t been so judgmental, he would have made more of an effort to make
things work.” She wasn’t being fair, blaming her parents for the demise of
their relationship. Jaxon had made his own decisions and was rarely intimidated
by anyone, including her parents.

Andrea sank back in her chair. “Oh, please.
Anyone could see that relationship wasn’t going anywhere. You may have loved
him, but any fool could tell he didn’t feel the same way about you.”

Sela couldn’t remember the last time her
mother’s words had cut so deep. “You don’t know how he felt about me. You’re
making all kinds of assumptions.”

“No, I’m not!” Andrea looked around before
lowering her voice. “You told me the things he said when he broke up with you.
He never loved you. He didn’t need you and no longer wanted you. What more can
a man say to get through to you, Sela?”

Sela was mortified when she felt the hot
burn of tears stinging her eyes. How could her own mother be so cruel?

“Mama,” Kiki said, “that’s enough. I don’t
think Sela needs to be reminded of the things Jaxon said to her that night. I’m
pretty sure they’re etched in her memory forever.”

“If that were true, she wouldn’t be
inviting him back into her life.” Andrea’s posture was stiff as she looked down
her nose at Sela. “I didn’t raise you to be some man’s doormat. You’re a
beautiful, intelligent woman with the potential to do anything you set your
mind to. You have a good man now, one who honors and respects you. Let go of
the past.”

Pain rendered Sela speechless as she got up
and stormed out of the restaurant. Her mother had the audacity to imply she was
some man’s doormat? It was time for Sela to show her parents who called the
shots in her life.

Jaxon felt a modicum of guilt for
eavesdropping on Sela’s phone conversation with her boyfriend, but when he
heard his name, he couldn’t resist finding out what she was saying.

“I got into it with my mother over Jaxon
today,” Sela said. “She found out my sister invited him to the wedding, and she
was livid. No, she didn’t blame me. She knew it was Kiki’s decision, but my
little sister was trying to stir things up, and she told my mother I’m working
at High Rollers now. Needless to say, Mama wasn’t impressed.” Sela sighed. “I
know I shouldn’t let her get to me, but she had the nerve to imply I’d been
Jaxon’s doormat. Can you believe she actually said that? His doormat?”

Jaxon fisted his hands as he skimmed the
menu he knew by heart. He had been hungry, but Andrea’s comments drove his
appetite away. How dare she claim Sela had been less than an equal partner in
their relationship? He may not have given her the emotional support she’d
needed, but he’d never treated her with less than respect and admiration. Except
for their last night together…

“I’m tired. I think I’ll just go home and
crash tonight. Yeah, my shift just ended. I’m kind of hungry. I didn’t eat much
at lunch, so I might grab a snack and head home. Okay, I’ll talk to you
tomorrow. I love you too, Sheldon. Bye.”

Those four little words nearly brought
Jaxon to his knees.
I love you too.
When he thought of all the times he
could have said those words to Sela, it made him physically sick. She’d just
confirmed his worst fear: She was in love with another man. Did that mean his
time had run out? Was he too late to get her back?

Sela spun straight into Jaxon’s chest and
put up her hands. “Oh God! I’m sorry. I didn’t see you standing there. I guess
I was kind of distracted.”

“Yeah, me too,” Jaxon said, gripping her
arms to steady her. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” she said, sighing. “It’s just been
a long day. I’m tired.”

“I can relate.” Fear superseded fatigue as
adrenaline coursed through his body though. “I was just going to grab a quick
bite in the V.I.P. lounge. Do you want to join me?”

She glanced around as if looking for an
answer. “I probably shouldn’t, but you know I hate to eat alone, and I’m
famished. Okay, let’s do it.”

Let’s do it.
He smirked at her choice of words, and his hand moved to the small
of her back so he could guide her through the crowd. What he wouldn’t give to
hear those three little words in a different context.

“What do you feel like?” Jaxon asked, once
they were seated across from each other. He was dying to delve deeper into the
conversation she’d had with her mother. He wanted her to know he’d always
admired and respected her, and her mother was way off-base in her assessment of
the situation. But to do that, he would have to admit he’d been eavesdropping,
which wasn’t an option if he wanted them to remain on speaking terms.

“I don’t know,” she said, scanning the
menu. “What do you recommend?”

“Depends how hungry you are. The nachos are
good. So is the fajita platter, but it’s a little big for one.”

“The chicken fajitas sound good to me.” She
closed her menu. “Would you mind sharing?”

Jaxon smiled as he thought of all the times
she used to steal food off his plate. She’d always order a healthy, low-fat
option, but when his decadent entrée arrived, she couldn’t resist the urge to
indulge. “Some things never change.”

“What does that mean?” she asked, quirking
an eyebrow.

“I was just thinking about the way things
used to be.” He closed his menu and set it aside. “I didn’t realize how happy I
was with you until you were gone.”

“Jaxon, please.” She raised her hand. “It’s
been a long day, and I’m not up for a trip down memory lane.”

“I understand, but I have to say this.” He
was finally getting the face time he’d craved with her, and he couldn’t resist
the urge to tell her what he’d been thinking and feeling in the months they’d
been apart. “You made me smile.”

A hint of a smile crossed her face. “You
made me smile too. A lot.”

“I guess what I’m trying to say is you made
me happy. I don’t know why I took that for granted, because I’d never been particularly
happy before you came into my life.” Jaxon would take advantage of every
opportunity to give her what she’d been asking for throughout their
relationship: full disclosure.

She looked saddened by his admission.
“Don’t say that. You had your work and your friends. You dated a lot. You had a
full life before you met me.”

“I was going through the motions. I worked
my ass off to build this business, mainly because I felt the need to prove I
was worthy.” He’d had a few sessions with a shrink in the past six months, but
he’d never been so open with him. “I wanted to give my life something it had
never had before: meaning. That’s why I started High Rollers. I wanted people
to look at me and see that I’d accomplished something big, that my life meant
something, that I’d left my mark.” He stopped talking when he realized she was
staring at him.

“Why do you feel you needed High Rollers to
give your life meaning?”

“My old man went out feeling like no one
gave a damn about him.” He lowered his head and ran a hand over his hair. “He
was a middle school science teacher. Most kids hate science at that age. When
they had a substitute teacher instead of him, they were always thrilled.”

“That’s kind of the way it is for
pre-teens, isn’t it?” Sela asked. “The real teacher’s away, and the kids think
it’s party time?”

“Yeah, but my dad felt like his life didn’t
matter. He went into teaching to make a difference in those kid’s lives, but
most days, he felt like he was more of a hindrance than a help. Most of them
didn’t like the subject, so they didn’t like him. After ten years, the feeling
was mutual. He said dragging his butt out of bed most mornings was a chore.”

“You’ve never talked much about your
father,” Sela said. “Did he suffer from depression?”

“I don’t know,” Jaxon admitted. “As a kid,
I just assumed that’s the way he was. He’d spend a lot of time in his workshop,
and when he was inside, he’d have his nose buried in a newspaper or grading
papers.” Jaxon could still picture him at the dining room table with his glasses
sliding down his nose, reading the evening paper from cover to cover and never
interacting with anyone.

“Did you ever ask your mother if he had a
history of depression?”

“Yeah.” Jaxon sneered. “You know what she
said? That he’d been a basket case for as long as she could remember.”

Sela laid her hand over his. “I’m sorry,
Jax. That’s really harsh.”

“Yeah, but that’s my mom for ya. She
doesn’t think about how her words might impact people. She just says whatever’s
on her mind.”

Sela flinched. “I know the feeling. My
mother’s the same way.”

Jaxon assumed Sela was thinking about what
her mother had said about their relationship. He waited until the waitress
stopped by to take their order and left before he said, “Would you think I was
a terrible person if I admitted that I overheard your conversation with
Sheldon? I know what your mother said about our relationship.”

Her face tightened as spots of color
appeared on her cheeks. “I wish you hadn’t heard that.”

“It wasn’t true.” He reached for her hand.
“You were always so strong and independent. That’s why I was attracted to you.
That’s what made it so hard for me to walk away.”

“I didn’t feel strong when we were
together,” she said, averting his gaze. “I’m not proud of how vulnerable and
needy I felt then.”

“What are you talking about?” He wanted to
pull her into his arms when he saw her shoulders slump.

“I loved you so much.” She sucked in a
shaky breath. “I just wanted you to love me back. I feel like I wasted so much
time obsessing over how I could get you to say it, or more importantly, how I
could make you fall in love with me.”

“Sweetheart…” He hesitated when she pulled
her hand away. “I was an idiot for not appreciating what I had with you—”

“Sorry, guys,” their waitress, Jean, said.
“I meant to give you this earlier, Sela.” She handed Sela a folded slip of
paper.

Sela read the note, her lips forming an O.
“Oh wow, it’s from Riley. I haven’t thought about him in ages.”

“I mentioned to him that you’re working
here now,” Jean said with a grin. “He seemed really excited about it. Did y’all
have a thing?”

The manager had just hired Jean a few
months ago, so she didn’t know about Jaxon’s history with Sela. He tried to
remind himself it wasn’t her fault as he fought the urge to lash out at her.

Sela glanced at Jaxon, looking uneasy. “We
went out on a few dates about a year ago. After that, we kind of lost touch.”

So Sela had gone out with the goalie as
soon as they’d ended things? That was knowledge Jaxon could have lived without.

“Well, it looks like he’d like to
reconnect.” Jean pointed at the slip of paper. “He said for you to call him
anytime.”

“I’ll have to let him know I have a
boyfriend.” Sela cleared her throat as she stared at the paper.

“Can you go check on our food, Jean?” Jaxon
asked, trying to control his jealousy and anger. He’d seen Riley in the bar
quite a few times since he and Sela broke up, but he’d made it a point to keep
his distance. Next time, he’d make sure their paths crossed.

“Sure thing, boss,” she said, scurrying
away.

“So you went out with that piece of—”

“Easy, Jaxon. Riley happens to be a good
guy.” She pushed her shoulders back.

“Good guys don’t take advantage of women.”

“He didn’t take advantage of me.”

“So he didn’t try to sleep with you?” Jaxon
clenched his fists. When she didn’t respond, he said, “He did! I’m going to
kill him.”

“No, you’re not,” she whispered, leaning
forward. “You’re going to leave him alone. What may or may not have happened
between us is none of your business. We were through, remember?”

Jaxon knew he should let it go, but he
couldn’t. “Do you know what it does to me to think of you making love to
someone else?”

“Then don’t think about it,” she said,
crossing her arms.

“I can’t help it.” He was at a loss. There
was so much he wanted to say, but he was afraid of driving her away. So much
for his plan to pretend he was moving on with Sabrina. Sela had to know he was
desperate to get her back. “I heard what you said to him tonight.”

She looked up, piercing him with her light
blue eyes. “Who?”

“Your boyfriend. I heard you tell him you
love him. Is it true? Do you?”

“You have no right to ask me that.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.” She
probably had one foot out the door, but he’d never been very good at censoring
his thoughts, especially when there was so much at stake. “If you do, it
shouldn’t be too difficult to tell me the truth.”

“There are different kinds of love,” she
said, her face and voice devoid of emotion. “There’s passionate love that makes
you feel like you’d die without that person, and there’s easy, comfortable love
that makes you feel as though that person contributes something of value to
your life, but you wouldn’t die without them.”

“You deserve a love you can’t live
without.”

“I don’t want that.” Her veneer cracked as
her eyes filled with tears. “I had that once with you, and I don’t want to go
there again. What I have with Sheldon is safer. It’s easier. It doesn’t scare
me.”

Jaxon hated knowing he’d instilled fear in
her, made her believe life would be better if she stayed on the safe side of
the street. The woman he’d met, the one who fell in love with him, had been
fun-loving and impetuous and embraced life with both hands. This woman was
different, more introverted and uncertain.

He leaned in. “I hate myself for making you
feel that way. I hate that I made you question everything.”

“Maybe I should be thanking you,” she said,
shrugging. “Before you, I was naïve. I believed in fairy tales and happily ever
after. I’m much more practical now. I know that relationships take a lot of
work and compromise.”

“Loving someone should be easy.” Jaxon
wished he could say or do something to erase the shadows lurking in her eyes.
“I know that now. I didn’t know that then.”

“Maybe you’re the one who needs a reality
check.” Her voice cracked. “It sounds like you’ve got some pretty far-fetched
notions about relationships.”

“When did you become so cynical?” He
already knew the answer. Maybe he felt he needed to punish himself.

“When I realized I would never have the
love I’d always dreamed about.”

“But you can have that.” He wished more
than anything he could pull her into his lap and kiss away her doubt and fear.
“
We
can still have that.”

“No, we can’t.” She looked shocked he would
even suggest such a thing. “I learned my lesson with you the hard way. I may
have fooled myself into believing in a future with you once, but I won’t do it
again.” She picked up her purse, crumpling the paper in her hand. “I changed my
mind about that snack. I’ll just grab something at home.”