Cinder (24 page)

Authors: Jessica Sorensen

BOOK: Cinder

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“Why?”

“You can’t go back into the shadow realm because the Anamotti were already invading it when we dove out.” He turns his head to look at me and I’m glad to see he’s calmed down. “And I can’t leave you because this place won’t exist without me; it exists only in my head. Once I’m gone, it disappears.” He pauses. “And the only other way to get out of here is to fly and unfortunately your wings are about as useless as mine right now, seeing as how you don’t know how to use them.”

I tense. “But what if someone gets in here?” Panic rushes through me. “Asher, Cameron’s right… I’m not ready to make that decision just yet.” As I realize what I’ve said, I add, “I’m not ready to sacrifice someone’s life.”

He searches my eyes intently then his gaze leisurely scroll over me, lingering a second or two longer on the ribbon of my shirt, which is starting to fray and loosen. “I know you aren’t.” He stares at me as various emotions reflect in his eyes, some that make my blood heat and some that make me want to run for the door. “And until you are, I’m going to keep you here. They can’t get to you if you’re here.”

“Am I safe here, though?”

“We are for a while, yes.”

I struggle to maintain my breathing, my heaving chest unraveling the ribbon even more. “I can’t believe this is happening.”

“I know it’s scary right now, but your safe with me right now Ember. And we’ll figure out how to end this all—how to stop Alton from killing the town and get you ready to make your choice.” He pretends to be unruffled, but I note he’s gotten shaky. “Whatever that might be.”

I want to tell him that I already know. That it’s him, but it would be a lie because I have no idea what I’m feeling for him or for Cameron—for anyone really. Everything is so confusing.

He must sense it too because he cuts me off as he moves to the window. “Want to see something amazing?” he asks and I nod, relieved he’s giving me an out.

Seeming a little nervous, he draws the curtain back, showing me the view outside. I’m not even sure how to respond to the surreal scene before me. Clouds that cover the sky, grass which encircles the house. A colossal waterfall in the distance rolls over rocks and crashes against the ground. Flourishing trees dot the land and flowers of all colors grow from the ground, twining around the trunks and branches.

“It’s beautiful,” I say, stepping forward and placing my hand on the glass.

He watches me. “I created this spot because I see it as perfect and no one can come here unless I allow them to.” He takes my hand, grazing his finger along my knuckles. “I promised I wouldn’t let anything happen to you.”

As he looks into my eyes, I feel something come to life inside me, but I’m not exactly sure what it is. Still, it’s warm and welcoming, so I let it grow and take over my body.

A smile slowly rises on Asher’s face. “Your eyes are back to normal.”

I glance in the mirror and let out a relieved sigh at the sight of my normal, grey eyes. “Thank God.” Yet, once again, my inner voice laughs at me, reminding me that I’m conflicted between good and bad. That the change isn’t permanent. “Now if I can just put my wings away, then maybe I can feel normal again.”

Asher’s eyes darken. “In a moment, I’ll show you how.” He releases my hand and eyes my mouth. “But first I want to do something.” He wets his lips with his tongue. “I know there’s a lot going on.” He leans in towards me. “I know there’s so much we don’t know yet.” His lips get closer and my stomach somersaults. “But you’re so beautiful right now and I just want to kiss you.”

He’s right. There is so much unsaid. So much at risk, and we should be focusing on that, but still, I stand motionless, waiting for his lips to touch mine. When they do, hot, fiery liquid spills through my veins. The feeling only heightens as his tongue slips into mouth. He pulls me closer, our bodies aligning, and I want hold onto him, yet at the same time, something stops me. A barrier, created by my Reaper blood, telling me not to kiss him, but kill him, suck his life from his body. The feeling only magnifies and finally it becomes too much and I pull back, shaking from head to toe as horrid feelings race through me.

“What’s wrong?” Asher says, his eyes a little glazed as he searches mine.

“It’s nothing.” My voice trembles and I take a deep breath before I say something that makes me hate myself. “I just don’t feel very well.” I motion at the wings on my back, feeling tears of guilt sting at my eyes.

He stares at me with suspicion, almost like he knows I’m full of crap, but it quickly evaporates and sympathy takes its place. “That’s completely understandable, considering what you’re going through.”

Tears stream from my eyes. I’m not even sure why I’m crying, whether it’s from guilt because I really want to kiss him, or because I didn’t get to drink his life.

“Hey.” He rushes for me and places my face between his hands. “It’s okay. Everything’s going to be okay.”

I suck back the tears, but they keep fighting their way out. “How do you know it will, though? Because, right now, everything feels incredibly wrong.”

“I know it does.” His eyes are full of warmth and compassion. “I’ll take care of you. I’ll make sure everything is okay.”

I nod, feeling the guilt build, like bricks, and crush me from the inside. “Thank you.”

“You don’t ever need to thank me,” he says with sincerity and then leans in to give me a quick kiss on the lips before pulling away. “Now, how about I show you how to put your wings away and then we’ll work on flying.”

“And where will we go if I can fly?” I ask. “I thought you said I was safe here.”

“You are.” He shrugs. “But maybe we’ll fly to New York if we half to.” He gives me a sad half-smile. “The possibilities are endless really, but I want to make sure you’re prepared just in case something happens.”

I nod, a little relieved. Not just because of what he said, but that I managed to pull myself away from my Reaper side and not kill Asher. Yet I can’t help wondering how long I can fight it. How long do I honestly have until my true side comes out?

And which side will be my true side?

The New York Times and USA Today bestselling author, Jessica Sorensen, lives in the snowy mountains of Wyoming. When she's not writing, she spends her time reading and hanging out with her family.

Other books by Jessica Sorensen:

The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden (The Coincidence, #1)

The Secret of Ella and Micha (The Secret, #1)

Breaking Nova (Nova. #1)

Shattered Promise (Shattered Promises, #1)

The Fallen Star (Fallen Star Series, Book 1)

The Underworld (Fallen Star Series, Book 2)

The Vision (Fallen Star Series, Book 3)

The Promise (Fallen Star Series, Book 4)

The Lost Soul (Fallen Souls Series, Book 1)

Darkness Falls (Darkness Falls Series, Book 1)

Darkness Breaks (Darkness Falls Series, Book 2)