Clear (Storm's Soldiers MC Book 3) (2 page)

“From you? I don’t go screaming at people.”

“No, but I do. You learned to cut me down with your words when I got in my moods.”

I rolled my eyes, but it was true. Darryl would come home seeing red some days, and I would sit there, slicing up the other dude in the ring - or sometimes Darryl - until he calmed down.

“But that’s not the same. I complemented your personality. Vaughn was just parroting stuff his brother would say. Saying the exact same stuff.”

“Yeah well, family can be like that too. They can push or pull. It’s like magnets facing the same way or opposite, but never nothing.”

I dangled my legs like a little girl. I’d known what Vaughn was, or at least I’d told myself I knew. Maybe I didn’t quite get how deep he’d been with his club. But damn, did that excuse him? I wasn’t being a child here.

Darryl’s hand landed on my shoulder. “You gonna me tell me what went down?”

I glanced at him a couple times, before deciding what the hell. If it made him think Vaughn was even more trash, then at least I’d be in the right.

I launched into the story, not leaving out a single detail of the night. Darryl’s face crunched to a scowl halfway through and stayed there.

“Rico hit you?” he asked after a bit of silence.

Oh crap. My mind wasn’t working straight. “Uh, yeah. Just the once. That’s why I left.”

“Why didn’t you…What did…” He sighed like a hurricane and shook his head. “God, that fucking prick.”

“Darryl, he’s gone. It’s ok. I’m ok.”

He was still glowering as he met my eyes, but I rubbed his back till he unclenched.

“So he went for you and Vaughn got him off, then told him off. Is that right?”

“Yeah.”

“He said ‘spic.’”

I looked around embarrassed. “Jeez, some of these kids are part latin right?”

“They’ve heard worse. Besides they can tell if it’s aimed at anyone.”

None of the kids were paying us much attention. “I guess.”

“So Vaughn got angry and he shouted a slur.” Darryl looked off at some corner then came back. “You ever consider that the reason he said what he said… was cause you remind him of family?”

I nearly choked on my breath. “What?”

“I don’t know how. Maybe cause he was protective like you were family. Maybe cause he felt comfortable around you like family. Either way, it let him let loosen up and say what came to mind.”

I didn’t know how to respond to that. Mostly cause it seemed awfully close to the truth. I shook the thought from my head. “You would never say that.”

“No, I wouldn’t. But I wasn’t a white boy raised by fucking Nazis.”

I didn’t say anything for awhile, and Darryl looked out upon his class. After a while, he started to chuckle. It grew and grew, and then it was a full blown laugh. Some of the students were looking at him, but he kept on roaring.

“It’s not that funny,” I said, feeling more childish by the moment. “I’m still not sure he was right.”

“That’s what you signed up for girl. What do you want?”

It wasn’t the first time I’d heard that question. It wasn’t the first time I’d thought about it these past few days.

But now I was starting to think I might have an answer.

CHAPTER TWO

Vaughn

I sat stuffed on a couch in the living room of what I’d once called home. One of Pop’s followers was up in front of about a dozen more, sweating all down his heavy body and running over his speech for the rally. Calix and I had honored seats, while the others crunched down over metal chairs. Pop sat off to the side, watching and grading the speaker like a hawk.

I let the words slip past my head, while I tried to piece together any more of my past. The walls were still baby blue and the crystal light on the ceiling was still the same delicate floral thing, but that was the last residues of my mother’s touch. Bit by bit, Pop had taken down the furnishings, the framed photos, the cheap and lively paintings that lined the wall. What replaced them was the new life her loss had driven him to.

The walls lay blanketed in posters now. Like the one of a white family over the words “Will you stand up for your race?” Or another one that had “Raise the Gates” exploding over a US map being flooded over by mud. Even the TV was gone, replaced with more propaganda and icons.

This place could rightfully be called Pop’s war room now. The dozen people here were all high up in his organization. That is, they had impressive titles and all. Truth was, there weren’t many more planning to join the rally than the ones here now. The Soldiers were twice the size of Pop’s little discussion club. Guess there wasn’t much interest in white nationalism unless it came bundled with fun like riding, drinking and shooting. Not that Pop took much account of the numbers. He ran this place like it was the beginning of a new constitutional convention.

The guy up front finished rambling on about some injustice about the hate crime system or such nonsense, and the audience clapped and hooted. They sounded loud as hell in this little room, but it was gonna be a damn whisper out in Centennial Park where the rally was being held. The speaker might get a mic, but the audience sure wouldn’t. There was going to be a lot more people booing than us cheering.

Us. Yeah, right.

I’d never much cared for these things, but I’d been ok to stand silent forming the honor guard inside the cop line doing the real protecting. Silence wasn’t quiet enough now, was it? Just showing up was affront enough.

Assuming there was still someone left in my life to be offended.

Meagan hadn’t called and I had let it be. I had been a dumbass, but not on purpose. That was for her to see, not me to justify.

Which wasn’t to say I hadn’t run through our last words a few dozen times in my mind. It didn’t seem like our fight was a closing to our time together, but that didn’t mean I wanted the tension to stick.

Maybe it was a blessing we were in a tiff. It would let me do my duty here without causing notice. The price was damn heavy though. God, did I miss having her tight little body in my arms, even to hold in silence.

Pop went up to the podium and stilled the room.

“Well done, Rudolph, well done. You stumbled in a couple places though, especially with some of the numbers.”

“I’ll work on it,” the guy blubbered. “I swear I’ll have it down straight.”

“I know you will,” Pop said in a kindly voice. “Just keep in mind that people will be looking out for those. We can’t have them doubting a word if we want to show them the truth.”

“No, of course. The truth must come out.”

I leaned hard on the cushions, intent on the ceiling. It was better than rolling my eyes or letting the sigh heave out.

“Calix,” Pop said. “Any suggestions from you?”

The cushions swayed and my brother’s jacket crinkled forward. “Not about the content, but about presentation. I want you to really see the crowd. I know you’re looking at us in here, but there’s gonna be way more in the audience. You gotta have that voice and the look that spreads, you hear me? You gotta be talking out to the world, not just to us.”

“Uh, ok. So louder?”

“No, it’s not about volume. It’s about how you gaze out, it’s about your intent being clear.”

“Oh…ok, I’ll work on that.”

Calix eased back, but the man burbled on a bit. I resumed my lack of interest.

“Vaughn.”

I looked at Pop. “What?”

“What about you? What do you have to say?”

He still had that fatherly look to him, but there was a bit of religious fervor aimed at me.

I shrugged. “It sounded fine to me.”

“Really? You think that would win you over?”

“I think it would get the point across.” I tossed Rudolph a nod. “Keep it up man.”

“Thanks,” the guy said, looking truly grateful. As if I were a crown prince of this movement or something.

Pop shook his head. “There’s always room for improvement and room for improvisation. In fact, why don’t you give it a shot?”

I cracked my neck. “Give what a shot?”

“Come up and say a few words.” He stepped out from in front of the mic. “Show us how you would reach out.”

“I’m not the talkative type.”

Pop frowned. The audience was all peering back at me. I couldn’t disobey him like this in front of his flock, but he had invited it upon himself. I didn’t know what had gotten into his mind, calling me up.

“I’m not in the right state of mind,” I offered. “I need a smoke.”

Before more words could be issued, I stood up and picked my way out of the room. Pop probably knew I didn’t smoke anymore, but he kept his mouth shut. No need for his congregation to sense division within the leading family. I headed out the front door and breathed up the fresh night air.

The street lay still, the other houses checkered with light. There was family in those rooms too, just watching TV, talking, or maybe the kids were out and the parents were fucking. The sorts of things that normal families did.

All my family was in that place behind me, but there was no warmth to it, just a cold alliance forged by blood and fueled by hatred. The Soldiers felt more tight than the Blacks. Would I even be talking to Calix anymore if I hadn’t joined them?

I got out to the driveway and hopped up on Viper. I knew where I could find warmth, but that door had shut on me. Maybe I could swallow my pride and open it back up myself. I whipped out my phone and stared at the dead black screen, barren of messages.

The front door thumped open. I glanced up as Calix stepped out, spotted me.

Shit.

He crunched over the grass lawn and stopped in front of my bike, but he wore no frown.

“Leaving?” he asked.

“Yeah, I think I’ve paid my dues. I got nothing to add in there anyway.”

He weighed down on the handlebars. “Pop had no reason to put you on the spot there.”

“It’s fine. He’s got the right to try.”

Calix nodded. “Yeah, and it’s fine you got nothing to say. It’s not your style, I know.”

Not my style. Not my feeling, either, but ‘style’ suited this company better. “Right.”

“Anyway, I just want to let you know that I notice.”

My heart stilled, but I said nothing.

“I notice you’re staying firm to us,” he went on. “You just being there and wearing your colors tight, well, we can use all of that we can get. That’s pride enough for me.”

“Alright.”

“Just want to let you know,” Calix said. “You’re doing fine as is.”

From some light that must be true. I gave my brother a firm look that told him things were good. Maybe we’d be fine if I hadn’t been in the Soldiers after all.

My phone buzzed. We both looked at the number that popped up on screen. Good thing, I hadn’t given it a name.

I opened the text away from Calix and read:
I’ve thought about it. I’m not saying I’m sorry, but I’m saying I don’t want you gone. Come over.

“That the girl?” Calix asked.

“It is
a
girl.”

He chuckled. That took me off guard almost as much as the text. “What?”

“Just any girl? I’ve never seen you light up like that.”

I darkened the screen before it could uncover other truths written on my face. “Yeah, she’s something.”

“I bet. Well, you go have fun. I guess I’ll see her eventually.”

I managed to keep my lips from flapping until Calix clapped my shoulder and walked off.

I tore my way down to the city. The wind stung my face, but all I thought of was the heat that awaited me.

Come over.
So much said with so little.

Meagan was at the door when I rang it. She dawned as it swung open, radiant in a frilly pink top and a navy skirt that barely covered her soft dark thighs. I had intended to start off with a parlay, but those weren’t clothes meant for talking. I swept in, arm curving up inside her skirt to grab her rear.

“Easy, white boy,” she said.

“Tonight’s gonna be far from easy on that body.” I rushed my lips to her face, but was met with her palm.

“What?” I muttered, breathing in the scent of her. I could barely keep my mind awake.

“You want to apologize first, maybe?” she asked.

“No,” I said, nudging into her neck. “Not with words.”

She sighed as I sank teeth into her flesh. Lust or dismay? Didn’t know, didn’t much care.

“You know you said a bad thing.”

I kissed my way to her ear and murmured. “I’m gonna be saying a lot of bad things tonight.”

She pushed my face away from hers. Her eyes burned like coal at me. “Not that word, though,” she said. “Never that word. Or any like it.”

Fuck it, she deserved that much. “No,” I promised. “Not that word ever again. I’ll try my damn best to stick to that.”

She nodded and the strength left her hand. My wildness had dulled a bit though, and I pulled her to me instead. We just stood there tight by the door, her heart pounding a steady beat against me. It didn’t race, it didn’t skip. It was just calm, and that was amazing. It meant things were truly ok. Just like that we were back to each other.