Color Blind (18 page)

“Are you scared?” I ask. “Because if
you’re not ready, it’s okay.”

Camryn

He’s misunderstanding my hesitation. It isn’t
that I’m ready to go all the way with him. I know I am. But before I do, I want
him to know that I’ve never done this before. Guys don’t find virgins as
attractive as girls who have experience.

“I’m a virgin,” I whisper, so soft the
roar of the waves crashing into the beach almost swallows the words up.

He pulls back and stares at me. One side
of his mouth quirks upward. “I know that, Cam.”

I nod. “Yeah and um, so, I know that
you’re probably not. So…”

“So you think that I find you less
attractive because I’ve done this before and you haven’t? You’re right; I’m not
a virgin. But damn if I don’t wish I
were
right now. I want more than anything to be able to experience you with the same
freshness and novelty that you’ll experience me. Cam, anything that I’ve done
before this moment is meaningless. There has never been, and there will never
be, another you.”

I smile and run my hands up his arms,
which are still cloaked with a jacket and a shirt. That’s two items too many. “Take
this off.”

His eyes widen, and he sits up to remove
his layers. When his jacket is off, I take over, sitting up to unbutton his
shirt. I look into his eyes the whole time, and the burning desire I can see in
them pushes me over the edge. My eyes drop to his biceps, and I run my hands
over the ink etched into his skin.

“I’ve never asked you about these,” I
realize. “What do they mean?”

“This one,” he replies, pointing to his
left arum, “is a tribal symbol I saw sprayed onto an overpass in Baltimore. It
spoke to me, so I took a picture and brought it to an artist.”

I nod, running the tattoo with
fascination. “And this one?” I kiss his other arm, and the muscle jumps under
my lips.

The tattoo is just two words scrolling
around his arm: FIND YOURSELF.

“This one has always served as a reminder
not to lose myself in all the bullshit. Whatever else happened around me, my
job was to stay focused and find what I am supposed to be living for. I found
half of my soul when I picked up a guitar for the first time. I found the other
half when I moved here and met you.”

I push him back on the sand, and proceed
to lose myself in him for the first time.

Chapter
22

Revelations

Cooper:
 
If you think last night didn’t change
everything
,
you’re wrong. I’m never letting you go now.

I sit up in bed, reading my early-morning
text from Cooper. I smile foolishly, still feeling giddy in my midsection from my
night with him. And wobbly in my legs.

My reply was simple.

Camryn:
 
Oh, no. Stalker boyfriend is so not
sexy. Unless he has a gift.

When he texts me back, he asks me to meet
him at our spot on the coastal road later this afternoon. Still smiling, I go
into the bathroom to get ready for the day.

Cooper

I just put my phone down on my aunt’s
coffee table after texting Camryn date plans when my phone dinged with a
notification of a new message.

Smiling, I pick it up again, expecting
Camryn to ask what she should wear.

Unknown:
 
You can’t avoid me forever. I have
things to explain to you.

Lilly?
I sigh. What is this girl’s deal? She just doesn’t take “I’m not that into you”
for an answer. How the hell did she even get my number? Well, I’d be perfectly
clear this time. And I’m going to do it in person, so there will be no
misunderstandings.

Cooper:
 
Meet Me at The Gull. It’s a restaurant
at the oceanfront. You know it?

I wait impatiently for her to text me
back. I’m ready to end this thing with her once and for all, so I can get on
with my life. With Camryn.

Lilly:
 
I’ll find it. See you in fifteen
minutes.

I put the phone down and go to rinse off
in the shower.

***

When I arrive at The Gull, Lilly is
standing in front of the wood-framed door waiting for me.

“Let’s get this over with,” I greet her
gruffly, opening the door and allowing her to enter first.

When we are seated in a rickety old
booth, we sit staring at each other for a full minute before I finally speak.

“Well? What’s so important you have to
stalk me over it?”

She narrows her eyes. “You really don’t
remember me.”

           
My
eyes widen. “What are you talking about?”

           
She
sighs. “Cooper. We used to play together when we were little. My dad used to
call me ‘Lil.’ Our dads were best friends.”

           
Something
shifts in my mind, trying to push its way to the surface. The image of a
laughing little girl, running in front of me in a city playground flashes into
my memory, and I reel in reaction to it.

           
“Lil?”
I ask incredulously. “What are you doing here? You just moved here, too, out of
the blue? I should have recognized you. Why didn’t I remember?”

           
“Because
after your dad left, your life completely fell apart. You went through a lot,
Cooper. I’m not surprised you blocked most of it out. I don’t know what kid
could handle seeing their dad almost killed. What you saw that night…it must
have traumatized you. I thought your mom would have told you about it, but when
I spoke to her in the fall back in Maryland, she…”

“Wait.
What?
You spoke to my mom in Maryland? What are you
talking
about?”

“I’ll start at the beginning. You ready?”

I just stare at her. I know my mouth is
wide open in shock, but I can’t seem to close it.

“I’ll take that as a ‘yes.’ We were best
friends from the minute we could walk, and our dads were in business together.
At least that’s what they called it. Our families are rooted in organized
crime, Cooper. I can’t escape it, and neither can you.”

I keep staring, but now my eyes drift
toward the door, wondering if I should make a quick exit. Lilly Brewer is
certifiable.

“Your dad is in charge of one of the
biggest organizations on the East coast,” she goes on.

“My father’s dead,” I say. I’m still
staring at her like she’s lost her mind, because she has.

“No, he’s not, Cooper,” she says softly,
leaning on the table. Her eyes earnestly lock on mine. “He’s not dead.”

“You’re telling me my father didn’t die
all those years ago?”

“That’s why I called you royalty. You
have the mob in your blood, Cooper. Just like I do. You’re supposed to take the
whole unit over for him one day. He hasn’t forgotten about you, Cooper. My dad
is still his right hand man.”

“You’re saying that my father is in the
mob?” I edged closer to the end of my booth seat, ready to make a run for it.

“That’s exactly what I’m telling you. And
your mom sent me here, to get you to think about returning to Maryland and
claiming your rightful place next to your dad.”

“My
mom?”

“When we were five, one of your dad’s men
attempted to assassinate him. You were with him. My dad helped yours pretend to
be dead so that he could go into hiding until the culprit was found. Your mom
had to go along with the plan, but I think they’ve been in love all along. I’m
not sure; I only know what I’ve been sent here to do.”

It took me a minute to respond to her,
but when I did, I said, “Which is?”

“Remind you of who you are. And I’ve been
wildly unsuccessful so far, because you’ve been so difficult. And you always
have that girl lurking around.”

I shake my head vehemently. “I know who I
am. And it has nothing to do with any of this
bullshit
you’re talking about. Look, Lil, I realize now that I have
some fond memories of you from so long ago. But that was then. I have a life
now.”
       

“Cooper—“

“No,” I cut her off. “I’m done with this
conversation. I don’t care what you think you came up here to do. I don’t even
care if anything you’re saying is the truth. My father is dead for all
intensive purposes. I’m going to keep it that way.”

I stand up.

She stands quickly, too. “Please don’t
go, Cooper.”

I leave our booth and walk toward the
door. “I’m done, Lilly. No more.”

She rushes up behind me, talking quickly.
“Cooper, you are going to want to know your dad. I know this is a lot to take
in right now, but this life you’ve been living down here isn’t real. It isn’t
you.”

I continue to walk until we’re outside of
the restaurant, then I whirl around to face her.

“What do you know about me? You knew me
for like, what? Ten minutes when we were little kids? You don’t know me now.
You don’t know what kind of man I’ve grown into, despite my loser of a father
who never decided to show up for anything in my entire life. The father I
thought was
dead
. So don’t act like
you know me, Lilly. You don’t. I have a life here. My band, my girl—“

“Camryn!” she spits. “She’s only going to
hold you back from what you’re meant to be.”

“Good,” I answer. “Because if I’m meant
to be an assistant mob boss to my crime lord of a father, then I’ll pass.
Thanks, anyway.”

“Cooper,” she says. “Your crime-lord
father is
here.
”

“What?”

“In Virginia. He didn’t think I’d be able
to get the job done, and get you to come back to Maryland. So he and your mom showed
up a few days ago to persuade you himself. He’s waiting for you now.”

“Well I’m not coming,” I say flatly.

But I sway on my feet.

Lilly shakes her head sadly. “I was
worried you’d say that. That’s why I had to use this.” She pulls a small bottle
out of her purse.

I stare at it, a hazy fog beginning to
settle in front of my eyes. “You drugged me?”

Everything around me begins to blur and my
legs wobble like Jell-O as I walk.
My
knees aren’t supposed to be knocking together this way, are they?

“Only because I love you,” she answers.
And right before I pass out, she shoves me into the passenger seat of one of
the parked cars in the lot.

Chapter
23

Fear

Camryn

I pace nervously on the sand-dusted
asphalt as I wait for Cooper. I’m standing in the place where he wanted to
meet, but he’s late. Cooper has never been late before.

As I stare into the distant ocean that
usually calms me but doesn’t today, an engine rumbles distantly. It grows
closer and louder, and I turn to see a motorcycle cruising to a stop behind my
Corolla.

The rider steps onto the sandy pavement,
walking toward me. As the shiny purple helmet comes off, the rider’s long brown
hair tumbles down, cascading around her shoulders in heavy waves.

Lilly.

My breath comes faster as she approaches,
and I can’t keep my thoughts from tumbling into a jumbled mess in my head. What
was she doing here? Did Cooper send her in his place? He would never do that. I
pull my phone out of my pocket, my eyes never leaving Lilly’s.

“Don’t bother,” she says. “He isn’t
coming.”

“How would you know that?” I ask her
angrily.

She smirks, and I want to slap it off of
her face.

“Because,” she answers. “He’s just not
that into you, Cam. Can’t you see that? If he were, he never would have kissed
me. I don’t know how he explained that kiss away, but it was real. And he
wanted it just as much as I did. Stay away from him. You’re only getting in the
way of what he’s meant to be.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean,
‘what he’s meant to be’?” I ask.

“It means this isn’t a fairy-tale, Cam.
He’s not going to ride in on a white horse and save you from your pathetic
life. He’s meant for something greater than this. Than
you
. Stay out of his way. And mine.”

It‘s like she’s wasted enough words on
me. Her lip curls in disgust, and she turns and walks away, pulling on her
helmet as she goes.

When her bike roars away with me still
staring after her like a zombie, I finally come to my senses and move. I race
to my car, and I’m strong enough to keep the tears from streaming down my face
until I drive away.

***

“And then she just rode away?” Dara asks
with disbelief.

“Yeah,” I say, falling back onto my
pillows.

“So you haven’t talked to Coop since?”

“Of course not,” I answer. “I’m not a
stalker, Dara. Do you know that I gave him a gift last night that I’ve never
given anyone before?” I look at her pointedly.

She gasps. “Cam! No. Really?”

“Really. So I can’t believe that he stood
me up today and sent
her
in his
place. How humiliating! I got the message loud and clear. Well, not so clear. I
still don’t know what she meant when she said he was meant for something
greater. But it doesn’t matter. If she wants Cooper, she can have him.”

Dara shakes her head sympathetically.
“You don’t mean that. You’re more of a fighter than that, Cam.”

I stare at her, shock registering on my
face. “Are you kidding me? You should be happy I’m giving up on Cooper and me.
You were never our biggest cheerleader.”

“I’m your biggest cheerleader,” she
corrects. “Cooper makes you deliriously happy, and I love that about him. And I
don’t trust this Lilly chick. I never trust bottle brunettes. Something’s not
right. Has Cooper texted you?”

“No.”

“And does that make sense to you? Has he
stopped texting you since the night of Sarah’s party?”

“No,” I admit. Dara is right. I haven’t
heard from Cooper after our missed date. And that isn’t like him. He’s been ridiculously
attentive since we made up. So why would he just stop now? Something isn’t
right.

I grab my purse. “I’m going to his aunt’s
house.”

“I’m coming with you,” she answers,
pulling out her phone.

“Who are you texting?”

“Brandon,” she answers.

“Dara, no! Stop! Brandon will tell Luka,
and he will feel the need to get totally involved.”

“Maybe they should get involved.”

I take a deep breath and shake my head.
“I’m going by myself. I don’t need to drag you into this.”

“You’ve lost your mind if you think I’m
going to let you do this alone. Who knows what that psycho was talking about?
And I’m worried about Cooper too.”

Dara is wearing her most stubborn
expression, the one that says she has already stopped listening to me and has made
up her mind.

“I won’t call Bran if you don’t want me
to,” she said. “But I’m going to send him a text and tell him what we’re doing.
I don’t have to tell him exactly where we’re going. Okay?”

“Okay,” I reply. Secretly, I’m happy to
have her company.

We drive my Corolla over to Cooper’s, and
I worry the whole way. Will he be there? If not, will his aunt know where he is?
What could have happened to make him stand me up? How did Lilly know how to
find me?

Too many questions. I need answers. Now.

Dara waits in the car while I knock on
the huge front door. I wait, and when the door cracks open, a familiar face
peers out at me. The door opens wider, and I’m staring at Cooper’s mother.

“Um, hello,” I greet her.

She looks at me a moment, and then gives
me her interpretation of a smile. It’s cold, though. There’s no emotion behind
that smile except maybe disgust.

“Hello.” Her green eyes are Cooper’s.
They stare at me without the warmth that his always hold.

“I’m looking for Cooper,” I say.

“Why would you be doing that?” she asks
sweetly.

“I’m his girlfriend, Camryn Grimes,” I
answer her, putting out my hand for her to shake.

She looks at my hand, and then back up at
me without taking it.

“I know who you are, Miss Grimes. Cooper
is not here. And I’m here now, so if I were you, I’d find another boy to dig
your claws into. My son is off limits.”

She closes the door in my face.

I stand there for what I think is a full
minute, staring at the wooden door in shock.

Then I turn and stalk back to the car.

“What happened?” Dara asks.

“That was Cooper’s mom,” I mutter. “She’s
a bitch. It was the weirdest thing that’s ever happened to me. She basically
told me to kiss of, and then she slammed the door in my face.”

“Do you think she knows something?”

I bite my bottom lip, thinking. “I don’t
know, Dara. I mean…she’s a
mom
. She
wouldn’t be involved in something that would hurt Cooper, would she? But
something is off about her, for sure.”

“What do you want to do?”

I watch the house for a second, and then
pull the car out of the driveway and down the road. I pull over to the curb and
sit, my eyes glued to the rearview mirror.

After about a minute, my instincts are
rewarded and a black sedan pulls out of Cooper’s driveway and roars down the
street.

“I’m going to follow her,” I say.