Complete Works of Joseph Conrad (Illustrated) (324 page)

“Might be father and son,” she said to herself.  She thought also that Mr Verloc was as much of a father as poor Stevie ever had in his life.  She was aware also that it was her work.  And with peaceful pride she congratulated herself on a certain resolution she had taken a few years before.  It had cost her some effort, and even a few tears.

She congratulated herself still more on observing in the course of days that Mr Verloc seemed to be taking kindly to Stevie’s companionship.  Now, when ready to go out for his walk, Mr Verloc called aloud to the boy, in the spirit, no doubt, in which a man invites the attendance of the household dog, though, of course, in a different manner.  In the house Mr Verloc could be detected staring curiously at Stevie a good deal.  His own demeanour had changed.  Taciturn still, he was not so listless.  Mrs Verloc thought that he was rather jumpy at times.  It might have been regarded as an improvement.  As to Stevie, he moped no longer at the foot of the clock, but muttered to himself in corners instead in a threatening tone.  When asked “What is it you’re saying, Stevie?” he merely opened his mouth, and squinted at his sister.  At odd times he clenched his fists without apparent cause, and when discovered in solitude would be scowling at the wall, with the sheet of paper and the pencil given him for drawing circles lying blank and idle on the kitchen table.  This was a change, but it was no improvement.  Mrs Verloc including all these vagaries under the general definition of excitement, began to fear that Stevie was hearing more than was good for him of her husband’s conversations with his friends.  During his “walks” Mr Verloc, of course, met and conversed with various persons.  It could hardly be otherwise.  His walks were an integral part of his outdoor activities, which his wife had never looked deeply into.  Mrs Verloc felt that the position was delicate, but she faced it with the same impenetrable calmness which impressed and even astonished the customers of the shop and made the other visitors keep their distance a little wonderingly.  No!  She feared that there were things not good for Stevie to hear of, she told her husband.  It only excited the poor boy, because he could not help them being so.  Nobody could.

It was in the shop.  Mr Verloc made no comment.  He made no retort, and yet the retort was obvious.  But he refrained from pointing out to his wife that the idea of making Stevie the companion of his walks was her own, and nobody else’s.  At that moment, to an impartial observer, Mr Verloc would have appeared more than human in his magnanimity.  He took down a small cardboard box from a shelf, peeped in to see that the contents were all right, and put it down gently on the counter.  Not till that was done did he break the silence, to the effect that most likely Stevie would profit greatly by being sent out of town for a while; only he supposed his wife could not get on without him.

“Could not get on without him!” repeated Mrs Verloc slowly.  “I couldn’t get on without him if it were for his good!  The idea!  Of course, I can get on without him.  But there’s nowhere for him to go.”

Mr Verloc got out some brown paper and a ball of string; and meanwhile he muttered that Michaelis was living in a little cottage in the country.  Michaelis wouldn’t mind giving Stevie a room to sleep in.  There were no visitors and no talk there.  Michaelis was writing a book.

Mrs Verloc declared her affection for Michaelis; mentioned her abhorrence of Karl Yundt, “nasty old man”; and of Ossipon she said nothing.  As to Stevie, he could be no other than very pleased.  Mr Michaelis was always so nice and kind to him.  He seemed to like the boy.  Well, the boy was a good boy.

“You too seem to have grown quite fond of him of late,” she added, after a pause, with her inflexible assurance.

Mr Verloc tying up the cardboard box into a parcel for the post, broke the string by an injudicious jerk, and muttered several swear words confidentially to himself.  Then raising his tone to the usual husky mutter, he announced his willingness to take Stevie into the country himself, and leave him all safe with Michaelis.

He carried out this scheme on the very next day.  Stevie offered no objection.  He seemed rather eager, in a bewildered sort of way.  He turned his candid gaze inquisitively to Mr Verloc’s heavy countenance at frequent intervals, especially when his sister was not looking at him.  His expression was proud, apprehensive, and concentrated, like that of a small child entrusted for the first time with a box of matches and the permission to strike a light.  But Mrs Verloc, gratified by her brother’s docility, recommended him not to dirty his clothes unduly in the country.  At this Stevie gave his sister, guardian and protector a look, which for the first time in his life seemed to lack the quality of perfect childlike trustfulness.  It was haughtily gloomy.  Mrs Verloc smiled.

“Goodness me!  You needn’t be offended.  You know you do get yourself very untidy when you get a chance, Stevie.”

Mr Verloc was already gone some way down the street.

Thus in consequence of her mother’s heroic proceedings, and of her brother’s absence on this villegiature, Mrs Verloc found herself oftener than usual all alone not only in the shop, but in the house.  For Mr Verloc had to take his walks.  She was alone longer than usual on the day of the attempted bomb outrage in Greenwich Park, because Mr Verloc went out very early that morning and did not come back till nearly dusk.  She did not mind being alone.  She had no desire to go out.  The weather was too bad, and the shop was cosier than the streets.  Sitting behind the counter with some sewing, she did not raise her eyes from her work when Mr Verloc entered in the aggressive clatter of the bell.  She had recognised his step on the pavement outside.

She did not raise her eyes, but as Mr Verloc, silent, and with his hat rammed down upon his forehead, made straight for the parlour door, she said serenely:

“What a wretched day.  You’ve been perhaps to see Stevie?”

“No!  I haven’t,” said Mr Verloc softly, and slammed the glazed parlour door behind him with unexpected energy.

For some time Mrs Verloc remained quiescent, with her work dropped in her lap, before she put it away under the counter and got up to light the gas.  This done, she went into the parlour on her way to the kitchen.  Mr Verloc would want his tea presently.  Confident of the power of her charms, Winnie did not expect from her husband in the daily intercourse of their married life a ceremonious amenity of address and courtliness of manner; vain and antiquated forms at best, probably never very exactly observed, discarded nowadays even in the highest spheres, and always foreign to the standards of her class.  She did not look for courtesies from him.  But he was a good husband, and she had a loyal respect for his rights.

Mrs Verloc would have gone through the parlour and on to her domestic duties in the kitchen with the perfect serenity of a woman sure of the power of her charms.  But a slight, very slight, and rapid rattling sound grew upon her hearing.  Bizarre and incomprehensible, it arrested Mrs Verloc’s attention.  Then as its character became plain to the ear she stopped short, amazed and concerned.  Striking a match on the box she held in her hand, she turned on and lighted, above the parlour table, one of the two gas-burners, which, being defective, first whistled as if astonished, and then went on purring comfortably like a cat.

Mr Verloc, against his usual practice, had thrown off his overcoat.  It was lying on the sofa.  His hat, which he must also have thrown off, rested overturned under the edge of the sofa.  He had dragged a chair in front of the fireplace, and his feet planted inside the fender, his head held between his hands, he was hanging low over the glowing grate.  His teeth rattled with an ungovernable violence, causing his whole enormous back to tremble at the same rate.  Mrs Verloc was startled.

“You’ve been getting wet,” she said.

“Not very,” Mr Verloc managed to falter out, in a profound shudder.  By a great effort he suppressed the rattling of his teeth.

“I’ll have you laid up on my hands,” she said, with genuine uneasiness.

“I don’t think so,” remarked Mr Verloc, snuffling huskily.

He had certainly contrived somehow to catch an abominable cold between seven in the morning and five in the afternoon.  Mrs Verloc looked at his bowed back.

“Where have you been to-day?” she asked.

“Nowhere,” answered Mr Verloc in a low, choked nasal tone.  His attitude suggested aggrieved sulks or a severe headache.  The unsufficiency and uncandidness of his answer became painfully apparent in the dead silence of the room.  He snuffled apologetically, and added: “I’ve been to the bank.”

Mrs Verloc became attentive.

“You have!” she said dispassionately.  “What for?”

Mr Verloc mumbled, with his nose over the grate, and with marked unwillingness.

“Draw the money out!”

“What do you mean?  All of it?”

“Yes.  All of it.”

Mrs Verloc spread out with care the scanty table-cloth, got two knives and two forks out of the table drawer, and suddenly stopped in her methodical proceedings.

“What did you do that for?”

“May want it soon,” snuffled vaguely Mr Verloc, who was coming to the end of his calculated indiscretions.

“I don’t know what you mean,” remarked his wife in a tone perfectly casual, but standing stock still between the table and the cupboard.

“You know you can trust me,” Mr Verloc remarked to the grate, with hoarse feeling.

Mrs Verloc turned slowly towards the cupboard, saying with deliberation:

“Oh yes.  I can trust you.”

And she went on with her methodical proceedings.  She laid two plates, got the bread, the butter, going to and fro quietly between the table and the cupboard in the peace and silence of her home.  On the point of taking out the jam, she reflected practically: “He will be feeling hungry, having been away all day,” and she returned to the cupboard once more to get the cold beef.  She set it under the purring gas-jet, and with a passing glance at her motionless husband hugging the fire, she went (down two steps) into the kitchen.  It was only when coming back, carving knife and fork in hand, that she spoke again.

“If I hadn’t trusted you I wouldn’t have married you.”

Bowed under the overmantel, Mr Verloc, holding his head in both hands, seemed to have gone to sleep.  Winnie made the tea, and called out in an undertone:

“Adolf.”

Mr Verloc got up at once, and staggered a little before he sat down at the table.  His wife examining the sharp edge of the carving knife, placed it on the dish, and called his attention to the cold beef.  He remained insensible to the suggestion, with his chin on his breast.

“You should feed your cold,” Mrs Verloc said dogmatically.

He looked up, and shook his head.  His eyes were bloodshot and his face red.  His fingers had ruffled his hair into a dissipated untidiness.  Altogether he had a disreputable aspect, expressive of the discomfort, the irritation and the gloom following a heavy debauch.  But Mr Verloc was not a debauched man.  In his conduct he was respectable.  His appearance might have been the effect of a feverish cold.  He drank three cups of tea, but abstained from food entirely.  He recoiled from it with sombre aversion when urged by Mrs Verloc, who said at last:

“Aren’t your feet wet?  You had better put on your slippers.  You aren’t going out any more this evening.”

Mr Verloc intimated by morose grunts and signs that his feet were not wet, and that anyhow he did not care.  The proposal as to slippers was disregarded as beneath his notice.  But the question of going out in the evening received an unexpected development.  It was not of going out in the evening that Mr Verloc was thinking.  His thoughts embraced a vaster scheme.  From moody and incomplete phrases it became apparent that Mr Verloc had been considering the expediency of emigrating.  It was not very clear whether he had in his mind France or California.

The utter unexpectedness, improbability, and inconceivableness of such an event robbed this vague declaration of all its effect.  Mrs Verloc, as placidly as if her husband had been threatening her with the end of the world, said:

“The idea!”

Mr Verloc declared himself sick and tired of everything, and besides — She interrupted him.

“You’ve a bad cold.”

It was indeed obvious that Mr Verloc was not in his usual state, physically and even mentally.  A sombre irresolution held him silent for a while.  Then he murmured a few ominous generalities on the theme of necessity.

“Will have to,” repeated Winnie, sitting calmly back, with folded arms, opposite her husband.  “I should like to know who’s to make you.  You ain’t a slave.  No one need be a slave in this country — and don’t you make yourself one.”  She paused, and with invincible and steady candour.  “The business isn’t so bad,” she went on.  “You’ve a comfortable home.”

She glanced all round the parlour, from the corner cupboard to the good fire in the grate.  Ensconced cosily behind the shop of doubtful wares, with the mysteriously dim window, and its door suspiciously ajar in the obscure and narrow street, it was in all essentials of domestic propriety and domestic comfort a respectable home.  Her devoted affection missed out of it her brother Stevie, now enjoying a damp villegiature in the Kentish lanes under the care of Mr Michaelis.  She missed him poignantly, with all the force of her protecting passion.  This was the boy’s home too — the roof, the cupboard, the stoked grate.  On this thought Mrs Verloc rose, and walking to the other end of the table, said in the fulness of her heart:

“And you are not tired of me.”

Mr Verloc made no sound.  Winnie leaned on his shoulder from behind, and pressed her lips to his forehead.  Thus she lingered.  Not a whisper reached them from the outside world.

The sound of footsteps on the pavement died out in the discreet dimness of the shop.  Only the gas-jet above the table went on purring equably in the brooding silence of the parlour.

During the contact of that unexpected and lingering kiss Mr Verloc, gripping with both hands the edges of his chair, preserved a hieratic immobility.  When the pressure was removed he let go the chair, rose, and went to stand before the fireplace.  He turned no longer his back to the room.  With his features swollen and an air of being drugged, he followed his wife’s movements with his eyes.