Confessions of a Demon (36 page)

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Authors: S. L. Wright

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BOOK: Confessions of a Demon
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But I had heard for myself the much more mundane reason why she had left Dread.

 

Lash turned to Glory. “I had
no
idea. You don’t think I’d hide something like this from you?”

 

Glory smiled blandly, but she might also consider the timing odd that Lash had defected to her line at this moment.

 

I was more concerned about making my point. “Vex’s plan was to expose us first, in a way that would benefit him, so the Fellowship of Truth could take over the world.”

 

Glory gave me a hard look. “You told Lash that Vex was dead.”

 

I took a deep breath. “Ram killed Vex.”

 

Confusion flickered in her face as she tried to figure out what I meant. I could feel her suspicion, as if she thought I was trying to pull a fast one. “Who did?” Glory asked.

 

“Ram. You know, the stealth demon. The one who’s been causing all the mysterious deaths.”

 

For the first time I saw a glimmer of recognition. “You mean Malaise. You know who killed Malaise?”

 

“It was Ram.”

 

Lash let out an irritated sound. “You keep saying that, but it means nothing. Who is Ram?”

 

“Glory should know better than anyone. Vex said he was working with you. To destroy his line.” I watched her carefully, reaching out with my senses.

 

Her suspicion was growing. “Either you’re a liar or he was. Why would he accuse me of working against him?”

 

There was no tinge of deception in her aura or the way she reacted. Then again, I would never trust myself after Ram had fooled me so completely. Even if I was touching Glory, I might not be able to tell if she was hiding a longstanding relationship with Ram.

 

I had to know for sure. “I don’t think Vex knew about Ram until he was being consumed. Ram was Merge’s offspring, the progenitor of Bedlam. You didn’t kill Bedlam, did you, Glory? Neither did Vex. Ram killed him after you both escaped.”

 

“Vex and I killed Bedlam,” Glory insisted quickly. “We beat him to death with the iron rods that held our coffins closed.”

 

She said it so calmly that it reaffirmed my opinion of these ancient demons—they had no conscience. “You killed his body, but you didn’t take his essence.”

 

For the first time, Glory looked uncertain, as if she had tried so hard to convince herself and everyone else that Bedlam was truly dead, that he was never coming back. The lie they had told was so old that it had calcified into stone inside of her.

 

“Bedlam isn’t coming back because Ram killed him that day he set you free.” I explained how Ram had learned to fortify his shields and told them word for word what Ram had said to Vex. Glory believed it; every word of it rang true with what had happened to her.

 

“You never knew you’d been helped by a demon?” I had to ask. “You never suspected Ram existed?”

 

“I thought . . . in weak moments I thought that Bedlam was killing the demons in my line, that he was preying on us.” Her lips clamped shut, as if even now it was difficult for her to speak about it.

 

“If it’s true, then who knows where Ram is?” Lash said, coming forward. “If we can’t sense him, he could be anywhere!”

 

“A secret killer among us,” Glory murmured.

 

“You didn’t know about this?” Crave asked Glory, as if he had never doubted her before. Glory ignored him, lost in thought.

 

Lash repeated herself, her voice rising higher. “He could be anyone!”

 

“You said that,” Crave pointed out.

 

Lash shot him a frown. “I mean, it could be Milo, and we wouldn’t know it.”

 

“If it’s Milo, he’s doing a good job of keeping us safe.”

 

Glory glanced from one to the other. There was a tightening in her eyes that said she didn’t like what she was seeing. What did she think of this love match? At this point she probably wished Lash was by Dread’s side, keeping watch over him instead of playing sex games with Crave.

 

Clearly Vex had been wrong about Glory; he had been running from shadows. Glory wasn’t scheming to stop his Revelation. She wasn’t working with Ram against him; she didn’t even know Ram. And since she didn’t know him, then she couldn’t tell me anything useful to stop him.

 

Now how can I keep him from killing Shock?

 

Glory abruptly turned to me. “You’re dying, honey.”

 

I admired her bluntness. “Yes, I know.”

 

“Why didn’t you take Dread’s essence? He was defenseless, from what I hear.”

 

I wondered who her spy was in the Fellowship. “I’m no murderer.”

 

Glory raised her brows. “It’s your business if you want to extinguish yourself. I won’t protest, seeing as you could be coerced into becoming a religious miracle.”

 

“That won’t happen, I can assure you. Dread understood that, even if Vex didn’t.”

 

Glory considered me long and hard. “Your shields aren’t very good, Allay, and you wear your emotions for everyone to see. But I don’t know what you expect from me.”

 

“I want to make sure Shock is safe. Ram says she’s too fertile. He said there’re too many demons, that we’re multiplying too fast for him to keep up with.”

 

“Interesting . . . maybe we can make it a bit harder for him,” Glory said. “We could use more demons in the world. If we took better care of our newbies . . . Well, it’s something to consider.”

 

“We need to find out more about Ram.”

 

“Believe me, I’m going to talk to everyone. If anyone has information about Ram, I’ll know it. In fact, it’s a damn good thing Vex is dead or I would have killed him myself after that stunt last night. No, I’m only just getting started. Dread has to man up now that Vex is gone, and he had better not step out of line again.”

 

“Will you help me protect Shock from Ram?” I didn’t add,
in the time I have left
. It was too morbid.

 

Her gaze sharpened. “I think you should worry about yourself, Allay. He may seek you out again, now that he’s exposed himself to you. He may want to silence you.”

 

“Maybe.” There was no telling what he was capable of.

 

“If I were you, I’d charge myself up.” Glory lifted her admonishing finger to keep me from speaking. “Depleted as you are right now, you’re a sitting duck. You wouldn’t be able to defend yourself from anyone in this state.”

 

“Seems like everyone lately has been trying to feed me.” But I wasn’t averse to the idea, now that I wasn’t being stuffed like a Thanksgiving turkey for Dread’s pleasure. “If I really bulk up, how long do I have left?”

 

Glory leaned over and patted my leg. “Two days, maybe three. You’d better be sure this is the path you want to be on, Allay.”

 

“I thought I had weeks left.”

 

“You’ve been sorely taxed, taken to the brink of death, if I’m not mistaken. There are limits to the soul, and you’ve found yours.”

 

I nodded, struck to the core.
I’m going to die. Day after tomorrow.

 

Glory gestured to Crave. “Give Allay some energy, Crave. You’re burning so bright, you’re hurting my eyes.”

 

Crave hesitated, glancing over at Lash. She was offended by Glory’s suggestion.

 

“I can find someone else,” I quickly assured Glory.

 

“Nonsense! Crave is busting out with more than enough. He could give you half and you’d both be up for anything.” Glory’s voice grew firmer. “So do it.”

 

“What if she tries to steal Crave’s essence when he opens to her?” Lash demanded. “What if this is some kind of elaborate ruse . . . ?”

 

Nobody was buying that, and Lash trailed off.

 

“All I’m talking about is a little power exchange,” Glory said, exasperated. “I’m not telling you to fuck her.”

 

Her voice rang in the air, and I felt myself blush like I hadn’t since I was a teenager. But I did want to take what Crave could give me. I needed to fully heal myself now that I had only a limited number of hours left. I had to work fast to take care of Shock.

 

Crave sat down next to me on the sofa and held out his hand. I silently took it, accepting the energy he began pumping into me. His palm was firm and square, his fingers light on mine.

 

Lash shot daggers at him, refusing to meet my gaze. She began pacing again, swishing her skirt from side to side like an angry cat. I felt quite detached from Crave even though his power began to course through me, lighting me up like a Christmas tree. It felt like sparklers tingling across my skin instead of something that drove deep inside of me, like Ram’s energy. Crave was a devastatingly handsome man with an undeniable magnetism, but I’d been burned black around my heart where Ram had touched me.

 

Glory sat back, a huge grin on her face, clasping her hands across her thick waist. “I’m a betting woman, Allay, and I think you’re not going to let yourself die. I think you and I can work together.”

 

 

 

An hour later, we had agreed to a mutual nonaggression pack. Glory agreed to help Shock, if she could, though she didn’t sound too confident. I wasn’t, either. If Ram wanted to get to Shock, Glory wouldn’t be able to stop him. Glory asked me to keep quiet about the ERI machine until she could explain it to her own demons and figure out what they would do about it.

 

It seemed like such a faraway concern, months in the future, way beyond what I needed to worry about. I was almost glad I wouldn’t have to be part of the debacle that was sure to come when demons were outed to the world.

 

With nothing else to gain, I was ready to leave Harlem. I wasn’t about to share everything I knew with Glory—such as the fact that Revel was already scouring recorded history to find out more about Merge. Now Revel was my only hope.
How sad was that?

 

I rubbed my hands together, but I couldn’t erase the feel of Crave’s palm. I was more charged up than I’d ever been. Lash was glaring at me as if I had stolen the food off her plate and eaten it in front of her. She had insisted on taking back the Prada dress, practically ripping it off me. But Crave finally let her feed from him, chastised by Glory’s sharp order to give the “poor girl” a break. That quelled Lash until I could change into her reluctant donation of an expensive pair of slacks and a cashmere shell, the most casual clothes she owned. Lash hated every second of my negotiation with Glory, not that she distrusted me. Her jealousy burned too brightly for any of us to ignore.

 

When Glory left through the back door, I went with her. To avoid the paparazzi, I followed her over the short chain-link fences that separated the gardens. At the end of the block was a larger apartment building with a yard surrounded by an old wooden fence. It was easy to get over using the thick crossbeams, though it was funny watching a forty-something, full-figured woman climbing over it so nonchalantly. I landed in a grassy patch with some scraggly bushes along one side. A walkway and a gate led out to the street. There wasn’t anyone in sight.

 

Glory stopped me. “Where are you going now?”

 

“To see Shock. I have to tell her about Ram. I don’t know what she’s going to do.”

 

“You should take care of yourself, Allay. I think you’re distracting yourself from what you really need to do. Worrying about Shock is a lot easier than dealing with your own problems.”

 

She was right. But I didn’t have to listen to her.

 

Glory gave me a cheery wave good-bye, completely at odds with the importance of her position and the gravity of the situation. She was timeless, that way. As if nothing could really touch her. “It’s a breath of fresh air to meet someone like you, Allay. And I’m not just talking about that lovely flavor you have. I can feel it without even touching you. No wonder you try to lie low. But I don’t think that will be possible anymore.”

 

Sadly, I agreed. I was quickly becoming notorious in demon circles, burning out as I was like a meteor. . . .

 

She went north, while I caught a cab going downtown. I settled into the back and took stock of my situation. Glory had given me a credit card and some cash, enough to last a few weeks. It showed her confidence that I would somehow be able to do the terrible deed. She’d advised that I get out of the city immediately to avoid Dread while the effects from Vex’s death shook down. She even gave me the locations of a few rogue demons who would be easy prey.

 

Shock and I should both leave, get out of New York, and disappear.

 

The cab pulled up on Park Avenue, across the boulevard from Revel’s place. I couldn’t sense his signature, but Shock was far up above. Surely she could feel me, too.

 

I was waiting on the corner for the light to cross, when someone tapped my elbow. Startled, I looked at the balding, middle-aged man. “Yes?” I asked.

 

“May I speak to you for a moment?”

 

He shielded his face with a hand, and his features morphed into Theo Ram.

 

I let out a screech in spite of myself.

 

“Allay, wait!” He grabbed on to my arm as I almost bolted away. His determination to speak to me, to explain, to make everything right again, poured into me through his touch.

 

It stopped me in my tracks. “What are you doing sneaking up on me? That’s not right.”

 

“Allay, why didn’t you take Dread’s essence?” There was anguish in his voice. “You’re dying.”

 

Suddenly I realized that the woman who had gotten out of the cab behind mine was now loitering by the window of the bookstore. She was young, wearing low- rise jeans and large, gold hoop earrings—like any other teenager you saw in the city. But they usually traveled in packs, not alone, and definitely not in cabs.

 

Glory had put a tail on me.

 

In a weird way, that made me feel better. Someone was watching out for me. “Come on,” I said to Ram. I took him into the Starbucks around the corner.

 

The strong, overlapping scents of coffee, spices, and flavorings assaulted my nose. There were strollers and moms gathered to one side, and people with open laptops seated here and there. It was late for breakfast and early for lunch, so there were empty seats.

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