Consequences (38 page)

Darcy’s next comment was made to Jane, and it was delivered in such a bland and innocent voice that it caught Elizabeth completely off guard. “However, Charles tells me that, for some reason, his sisters have absolutely refused to accompany him to Netherfield, but he assures me their refusal will not deter his arrival. How distressing this news must be to you, Miss Bennet. I know you will miss their company.”

The delivery of this comment to her sister—and the barb accompanying it—resulted in Elizabeth choking on her soup. Jane was quick to lend a hand, pounding her sister on her back until the coughing subsided.

Elizabeth glared furiously at Darcy. “Humour, Mr. Darcy? You have developed a sense of humour and have decided to display it during soup? I must insist on adequate warning next time, sir!”

Darcy only smiled, and the others at the table laughed, including Jane, whose eyes were bright. Elizabeth was overjoyed by the news of Bingley’s eagerness to return.

Georgiana leaned over to her brother and said softly, “She is witty, Brother. I like her!”

Darcy bestowed a benign smile on his sister. “I rather like her myself, Georgie.”

Chapter 23

“A true friend unbosoms freely, advises justly,
assists readily, adventures boldly, takes
all patiently, defends courageously, and
continues a friend unchangeably.”

—William Penn,
English Quaker leader and
founder of Pennsylvania

Monday, April 27, 1812

Georgiana put her hand on her brother’s arm as the coach turned off the road into the approach to Netherfield.

“Mr. Bingley appears very anxious to see us, William,” she said in her soft voice. “He is already out in front of his house waiting.”

Darcy leaned over, looked out her window, and saw that she was indeed correct. As for Bingley’s excitement, not only was he on the front steps, he was fairly bouncing up and down with enthusiasm.

“So I see, Georgie. He appears almost as anxious to see us as I am to be here. I wish I could have come down on Saturday.”

“So you have been saying every hour since bidding Elizabeth goodbye at her uncle’s house,” said Georgiana, smiling. “Honestly, William, I had never thought to see you so changed that you could not stand to be away from your fair maiden for even two days. Why, you used to get by without seeing me for weeks and weeks!”

Darcy winced at the accuracy of her comment, and Georgiana’s face fell as she saw how it stung him.

“Oh, please forgive me, William,” she said in concern. “I did not mean—”

Darcy put his finger to her lips. “I know you meant no harm, dearest. It is my own conscience that is my fiercest critic. Leaving you alone is only one of my many mistakes lately. Including,” he said morosely, gesturing at the rapidly approaching Bingley, “what I may have done to my closest friend.”

Telling Georgiana what he had done to separate Bingley and Jane Bennet was one of the hardest things Darcy had ever done in his life, almost harder than having to tell her their father was dead. By that time, Georgiana had become as friendly with the sweet-tempered Miss Bennet as with Elizabeth, and Darcy had long since realized he had completely mistaken her character the previous November. She was much more reserved than Elizabeth, but he had numerous occasions to witness how Miss Bennet was utterly unable to find fault with others. The idea that she might have been indifferent to Bingley or toying with his affections quickly became ludicrous. But, as gentle as her manner was, he was convinced there was a core of steel in her heart, and his notion that her mother could have persuaded her to marry Bingley had she not cared for him now seemed laughable.

In addition, several times he saw her looking wistfully at the gaiety of her sister, and he winced internally at the clear implication that her unhappiness was the result of his ill-conceived defence of his friend. He tried to find an opportunity to speak of the subject with Elizabeth, but the occasion did not arise before she departed for Longbourn. While he dreaded having to confess his fault in the matter because of the bond between the two sisters, he also knew he needed to remove an item that might be a source of mistrust between them. He treasured the increasing warmth Elizabeth was showing him, and he would rather have her furious with him than to leave the matter unresolved.

But, since he desperately needed to talk to someone about it, and because he was certain he must tell her one day, he eventually revealed the whole unfortunate episode to Georgiana. Remembering the look on her face, he believed it was the first time in her life that he had ever truly disappointed her, and she fled to her room in tears after he was finished.

It was almost an hour before she had reappeared, and the discourse that followed was almost as difficult as the previous one, for he asked her for advice, a situation unprecedented in her life. Georgiana shared many attributes with Jane Bennet, however, and she did not withhold her forgiveness, though she had just taken a valuable, albeit painful, step towards adulthood by realizing that even a revered elder brother was human, with human frailties. Her advice was to make all the details known to Bingley as soon as they arrived at Netherfield. He nodded in agreement for it aligned with his own thoughts, but, having gone through one anguished confession to his sister, he was not looking forward to repeating the experience with his friend.

As the coach pulled to a stop before Netherfield, Georgiana leaned close and said softly, “Do not worry so, William. Knowing Bingley as I do, I do not believe he will order you off his property after your conversation!”

Darcy cocked an eye at her, noting the laughter lurking behind her composed expression. “I think you have been seeing far too much of one of the Bennet sisters—and it is not the meek one to whom I am referring!”

“Well, you did promise me she had much to teach me, Brother,” Georgiana said sweetly.

Darcy smiled, knowing he could make no response nor wished to and simply exited the coach and offered his hand to his sister. Bingley could hardly stand still as he greeted her, then he turned to Darcy with a huge smile on his face.

“Darcy, I have never been so shocked in my life as when I got your express! Imagine, being engaged to the same young lady you claimed was not handsome enough to tempt you when I suggested you dance with her!”

Darcy winced again. “Please, Charles! Georgiana has already learned too many of my flaws lately. I would like to retain a few shreds of my reputation, if you please!”

Bingley laughed delightedly, and Georgiana took his offered arm and smiled up at him. “Pay no attention to him, Mr. Bingley. Come, let us go inside where I hope you will share anything you might wish to tell me about my beloved elder brother!”

Darcy groaned as the two preceded him up the steps. This bore the marks of being even more humbling than he had thought possible.

***

“And then what happened?” asked Bingley, handing Darcy a freshly filled glass of port.

“Thank you, Charles. Well, I met her in the Park the next morning. By that time, I was convinced she was going to refuse me because of the ineptness of my proposal. Instead, to my vast surprise and pleasure, she only wanted to make certain points clear, such as the bleak financial position of the Bennet ladies after Mr. Bennet passes on. When I told her I understood my obligations perfectly and had no qualms about assuming them, she consented to the match. It was, I believe, the closest I have ever come to being totally, deliriously happy.”

“You do tend to be a trifle sombre, old fellow,” said Bingley with a chuckle. They sat in Bingley’s study while Georgiana rested in her room before their visit to Longbourn. “I take it Mr. Bennet was surprised to find you on his doorstep, requesting the hand of his daughter?”

“I believe surprised might be a somewhat inadequate word if you want the truth. Fortunately, Elizabeth gave me a letter for him, and that helped clear up any questions on his part.”

“I wonder what she said in that letter,” chortled Bingley. “‘Dear Papa, this stranger has asked for my hand, and I have accepted. Please give him your consent.’”

“Actually,” Darcy said quietly, “I think she said, ‘Father, a rich man wants to marry me, and I have sensibly accepted his offer since it will make sure my Mother and sisters do not starve.’”

Bingley’s laughter died in his throat as he saw Darcy was not jesting. After a few moments, he said, “That seems rather cold-blooded, Darce. I cannot believe Miss Elizabeth would be so mercenary.”

“Do not misunderstand me. I do not believe that was the whole of her reasoning, and I am grateful to have her acceptance, no matter what the rationale. And I cannot fault her warmth toward me since she returned from Kent. But I have reason to think on some elements of my previous conduct, both here in Hertfordshire and elsewhere, and I am not satisfied with certain things I have done and said. The fact that I have been gifted the opportunity to achieve my life’s desire is a blessing beyond measure, and I have vowed to alter those parts of my actions and thoughts with which I am displeased.”

“It is not as bad as all that, Darcy. You are well known in our circle for—”

“I beg to differ, old friend; it is indeed as bad as all that,” Darcy said intensely. “Can you imagine what Elizabeth would think if she knew I had called her ‘barely tolerable’ and ‘not handsome enough to tempt me’? But even worse is what I have done to you, my closest friend.”

Bingley’s brows knit in confusion. “Now I really am baffled. You have been the most loyal and reliable friend I could ever wish. I value both your friendship and your many counsels. I refuse to believe you would knowingly harm me.”

“It was not my intention, but hurt you I have by arrogantly presuming to interfere between you and Miss Jane Bennet.”

Bingley sprang to his feet at these words, almost looking like a deer ready to bolt from the hunter. He paced about the room in a frenzy of agitation before he stopped abruptly and faced Darcy. “I was blind back then, thinking she was an angel—my angel. But you and my sisters were right; she was only being kind, and I was deluding myself about her attachment to me. If not for your help, I should have blundered into a disastrous marriage . . .”

“I have come to believe she was not indifferent,” Darcy said grimly. “I was so proud of my judgment, and on the basis of a single night’s observation—actually, part of a single night, and from across the room at that—I was quite ready to pronounce her indifferent. But I was not only wrong, Charles, I was in error for presuming to interfere in such a matter. I have been in company with Miss Jane Bennet in London for almost two weeks, and I have realized that what I took for indifference was merely her normal reserve. What is inexplicable is that I, who everyone agrees is quite reserved, could not even recognize the same trait in another! Good judge of character? Hah!”

With that, Darcy drained his glass and got up to refill it himself. Bingley remained standing, open-mouthed in amazement.

“And this is really the hardest part to confess, Charles,” said Darcy, turning back to face him, even though he really wanted to turn away to the window and hide his face. “Your sisters allied with me in desiring to separate you from Miss Bennet; they had no desire for a sister from the unrefined country. In addition to joining with me to convince you of Miss Bennet’s indifference, Caroline actually received Miss Bennet at your townhouse in London after Christmas and then returned the visit at her uncle’s in Cheapside, though she took great care to ensure that Miss Bennet realized Caroline was severing the acquaintance. I believe she and her sister sought an attachment between you and Georgiana.”

“Georgiana?” said Bingley in stupefaction. “But, she is only fifteen, for Heaven’s sake!”

“Actually, she just turned sixteen, but your point is sound.”

“And obviously she planned on attaching herself to you!”

“I believe such was always her intent,” agreed Darcy dryly. “But it troubles me greatly not to have informed you of Miss Bennet’s presence in town after Caroline gave me the information. I thought you might have put aside your feelings for Miss Bennet by then, but I did not want to chance it, so I did not tell you.”

Bingley was silent for some time, not looking at Darcy, just staring at the wall. “This is quite disturbing, Darcy.”

“I know, and I cannot express how sorry I am and how badly I feel about my actions. I would not blame you if you asked me to leave immediately.”

“Yes, yes, I can see you are sorry,” Bingley interrupted, waving his hand at Darcy. “And yes, it angers me to a degree. But more disquieting are my own actions; I accepted what you and my sisters did, and I did not have to. I am disappointed . . . but more disappointed in myself. I know you have worked to increase my self-reliance, and it is clear I have some distance yet to go before I reach that objective.”

“Perhaps, but your words indicate you may well have come further than you think. And there is a reason for optimism—the situation does not appear beyond correction. Not only do I now believe Miss Bennet was not indifferent to you last winter, I also have reason to think she is not indifferent to you
now
. The question is, what are your present feelings for
her?
”