Control (9 page)
Authors: Ali Parker
Two Weeks Later
Cole
The only text I'd gotten from Alexis was that she wasn't pregnant over the last two weeks. I couldn't help but be a little saddened by the news and the mere fact that we weren't talking. I wanted her so damn bad that my muscles were sore and tired all the time. I was lethargic and nothing tasted good or felt quite right.
I didn't need lust to get through the day and find peace in my world. I needed love. I needed her.
I ran my hand through my hair and glanced up as the bartender stopped in front of me and smiled.
"Hey, aren't you that Cole Alexander guy?" He narrowed his eyes a little as if he were trying to recall a picture of me that would validate his thoughts.
"Yeah. That's me." I lifted my empty glass to him and smiled. "Can I get one more?"
"Of course. This one is on the house." He took the glass and turned his back to me.
I slumped down farther in my seat and pulled out my phone for the tenth time that day. I needed to tell her, but the thought of her being capable of walking out and leaving me sleeping alone stung. I was being bullheaded and it was costing me everything, but I couldn't move past it. Letting myself dive in deep with her only to have her walk out on me was a fear I could move past.
I ached for her. Every inch of me. My daydreams had me panting out loud and my cock so hard I thought the poor fucker might crack in half. How she had whittled her way down inside me to lay claim to my deepest desires was beyond me. The woman had me bent over internally and trying to contrive any way possible to get her back into my bed, and fully into my life.
I wanted her to quit her job and come be my assistant, which honestly seemed ridiculous. She loved her job at Vandrake. It fit her persona, and she probably had family in Seattle, not that I'd asked. I'd been too concerned with bedding her as many times as possible over a thirty-six-hour period. She had issues in her past with sex, and here I was, exploiting her body for my own personal gain. No wonder she hadn't tried to find me again. Maybe her leaving that night was a way of protecting herself. From me. From love.
"You look like you're having woman problems." The old-timer set the drink down in front of me and leaned against the bar. "You need to talk about it?"
"I don't know if it's a problem I'm having, or if I'm just lamenting over what I've lost at this point." I lifted the drink, knowing that it had to be my last. I had a speech at nine the next morning for a large automotive conference. I'd flown in that morning and spent the day wandering around Florida, wondering what the fuck I was actually doing with my life. Why everything suddenly seemed fuzzy was beyond me. It was her, consuming my thoughts, my needs, my desires.
"Is she worth it?" He chuckled and moved back.
"I think so. She sure as hell seems like she is." I took a drink of the drink. "She just already has a life in Seattle, and I travel the globe. It's not as easy as one of us leaving our life for the other. And we parted this last time without too many words between us. Seems tragic now that I'm thinking about it."
"Love is the one thing everyone wants. It's a common thread between all of us." He shrugged and crossed his arms over his chest. "You'd think a smart fellow like yourself would know that."
I smiled. "I don't know, but that doesn't mean it's accessible. Sometimes the things we want most in life are the ones that run the hardest from us, always staying just out of our grasp, you know?" I finished the drink in two gulps and got up. Working through the meaning of life with a bartender in Florida wasn't on my list of things to do.
"I agree with that, Mr. Alexander, but you're the one who preaches that anything is possible. That all we have to do is figure out what we want most, tune in to what's standing in our way of getting it, and move the mountains in our life to align our wants with our reality. Right?" He scratched his head, and I realized that he was being genuine. He wasn't making fun of me, or calling me out, but honestly asking if I believed the message that I sold for a living.
"You're right. I'll call her tomorrow after that event and fly back to Seattle. She's worth all my energy, all my effort and every fucking dollar in my pocket." I tapped the bar top and smiled at him. "Thanks man. I needed that."
"Anytime, Sir."
I walked up to my room and pulled out my phone, texting her that she was on my mind and I would be coming for her soon, no matter how she felt about it. There was no mountain big enough to keep me from her, including our collective fears. Period.
*
I woke the next morning feeling like a million bucks. Indecision had the power to shut people down and lock them in a place that held them powerless. I was no different. Thank God for the old goat at the bar the night before. Without him I'd still be mulling over all the reasons why things just couldn't work out for me and Alexis. And I was wrong. We had everything going for us.
She could leave her job and join me, or I would relocate and we would work through a travel schedule that both of us could handle. Either way, I was going to claim her as mine and make sure she was damn well aware of it.
"You ready, buddy?" Sam moved up beside me and patted me on the back as we walked toward the large conference room at the end of the hall.
"Yeah. Did you get in late last night?" I ran my fingers through my hair and paused by the door.
"Yes. My mom's doing a little better, but I didn't want to leave until my brother could get there. Were you lonely last night? Did you miss me? Cry a little over it?" He brushed something off my shirt as I swatted at him.
"No, you hooker. I was fine." I pressed the door open a little and glanced back at him. "I'm going to figure things out with Alexis. I'm ready to have a woman in my life all the time, and I want it to be her."
"Oh. Wow. Does she know this?" He smirked.
"Not really. Well, maybe. I texted her last night, but she didn't respond. I'm not sure what the fuck that means, but whatever. I'm tired of sleeping alone, and to be completely honest, she's all I've thought about since that fucking charity event last month."
"Good. I think she'll be great for you, now lose the boner and mend up your heart." He patted my back. "Get on that stage and remind them why they pay us the big bucks."
"Me. They pay me the big bucks. I just support you because you're a habit I can't break." I smirked.
"And I don't even have tits. This is huge!" He pushed at me and laughed. "Get in there man. Do what you do best. Offer hope to a hopeless world."
I nodded and walked into the room as they announced my name. I was surprised by the warm welcome I got seeing that the room was filled with big overweight automotive guys with stained shirts and grimaces on their faces. Based on my expectation of the morning, I was dreading the event, but within minutes, I was home, right where I should be.
I wrapped everything up in an hour and walked off stage as something caught my eye in the back of the room.
A dark-haired woman walked toward the exit and paused, but didn't look back.
"Alexis?" I moved through the crowd, stopping to shake hands and pat guys on the back as they told their stories about overcoming. My heart was racing by the time I made it to the back and I had no doubt that if it were her, she was long gone.
I pushed open the door and walked out into the hallway at the back of the hotel, not seeing anyone.
"I thought about going into the bathroom, but with your luck, we'd get caught this time." Her voice caused my heart to skip a beat.
I turned and shook my head as I walked toward her. "What are you doing here, baby?"
"Coming after you. I hate giving up control to anyone, but you've already taken it from me, haven’t you? You're all I can think about. I had to risk my heart to see if this could go somewhere. I had no choice." She reached for me as I wrapped my arms around her and pressed her tightly to the wall behind her.
"Shit." Hard emotions burned down the center of my chest and I pulled her in and breathed in deeply. "I was coming after you today. I'm so sorry for not telling you how badly I wanted you in my life the last time we spoke. I pussied out. I should have come into that office and reminded you that you already were mine." I pressed my lips to her and rocked my hips forward, wanting into every part of her.
She opened her mouth and welcomed me in as her fingers ran through my hair, scratching softly. "I want you in my life, to be my man, Cole. You think you could be that for me?" I glanced down as she handed me the card key for a room.
I snatched the card and wrapped my arm around her shoulders as I moved us to the elevator.
"I already am... you just failed to recognize it."
She slid her hand down my back and cupped my ass as we moved into the elevator. "Remind me."
"I will, every night for the rest of your life." I pressed her to the back wall of the elevator and tugged at the edge of her skirt, ready to do more than remind her that no matter how bad she wanted control back... it wasn't within her grasp any more.
It was mine, and she was too.
The End
Ali Parker is a full-time contemporary romance writer who is looking to flood the market this year with lots of great, quick reads. She loves coffee, watching a great movie and handing out with her hubs. By hanging out, she means making out. Hanging out is for those little creepy elves at Christmas. No tight green stockings for her.
