Read Conversations with Myself Online
Authors: Nelson Mandela
Even the C.O. finds it difficult to express himself in English. In fact during the 14 yrs of my incarceration I have met no C.O. whose English is as poor as that of Col. Roelofse who commands a prison…where the overwhelming majority of prisoners are English-speaking and who know no Afrikaans.
Ban on correspondence with political supporters
. Lt. Prins has now told me that we are not allowed to communicate with any people known to the Dpt to be our political associates nor to relatives of other prisoners irrespective of the contents of the letters.
Telegrams and Easter cards
. The C.O. has introduced a new practice of not allowing us to see the actual telegrams sent to us. What happens now is that one is given a message scrawled on a piece of paper and without the date when the telegram was sent and received as well as other essential information. The current belief is that these telegrams are first referred for scrutiny to the security police before delivery to addressee and in order to cover up the resulting delay the C.O. has introduced this practice.
The people who send these telegrams pay more money in order to ensure speedy delivery of the message and it is a matter of public concern when a govt [government] dpt deliberately frustrates the smooth and efficient operation of a public service for which citizens pay a special fee.
Money received for prisoners
. There is a general impression amongst prisoners that the C.O. and the Security Police are running a racket with our moneys. On May 31, 1976 Lt Prins sent a message to the effect that an amount of R30 was received from Mr and Mrs Matlhaku on Nov. 5, 1975. No explanation was given as to why this yr [year] he repeatedly told me that the money had not been received nor why the money was not shown as having been credited to my account in the statement supplied to me by the accounts section.
I must tell you that the negligent manner in which my complaints have been investigated and the lengthy delays involved in extracting simple information on what are essentially trust moneys is a matter of serious concern which you ought to investigate as soon as you can and clear the reputation of your Dpt at least in this particular respect.
Political discussions at the sittings of the Prison Board
. It has been the practice for several yrs now at these sittings for its members to engage prisoners in political discussions. These discussions are used by the Board for the purpose of victimizing those who are opposed to the policy of separate development.
COP’s [Commissioner of Prisons] failure to visit political prisoners on R.I
. [
Robben Island
]. The abuses described above are aggravated by your failure to visit the island and to give us the opportunity of discussing these problems directly with you. A visit by other officials from H.O. [Head Office] whatever their rank may be, can be no substitute for a visit by the Head of the Dpt in person.
One of the main causes of the friction here is the link between this Dpt and the Security Police and one of the first steps in your attempt to address our grievances is to cut that link completely. Many prisoners regard the COP in regard to all matters concerning us as a mere figurehead and that the real boss is the chief of the S.P. [Security Police] who orders the COP not only what to do but how to do it.
I have been wondering whether I should continue to be party to a practice I consider unethical and which gives the impression that I still enjoy rights and privileges which have been so whittled away that they have become practically valueless.
But I still believe that you as Head of this Dpt who holds the rank of General will not allow [or] condone these underhand methods, and until your actual decision on the matter proves me wrong, I shall continue to act in the belief that you are not aware of what is going on in this prison.
It is futile to think that any form of persecution will ever change our views. Your Govt and Dpt have a notorious record for their hatred, contempt and persecution of the Black man, especially the African, a hatred and contempt which forms the basic principle of the country’s laws. The cruelty of this Dpt in subjecting our people to the indecent practice of thawuza, according to which a prisoner was required to strip naked and display his anus to inspection by an official in the presence of others, the equally obscene practice of a warder poking a finger into a prisoner’s rectum, of brutally assaulting them daily and without provocation was curbed by the Govt after it has erupted into a national scandal.
But the inhumanity of the average S.A. [South African] warder still remains; only now it has been diverted into other channels and has taken the subtle form of psychological persecution, a field in which some of your local officials are striving to become specialists. I have the hope that a man of your rank and experience will immediately grasp the gravity of this dangerous practice and take adequate measures to stop it.
It is pointless and contrary to the country’s historical experiences to think that our people will ever forget us. Although 160 yrs have passed since the Slachter’s Neck executions, 74 since the internment camps of the Anglo-Boer War and 61 since Jopie Fourie made his last speech.
I will certainly never believe you if you tell me that you have now forgotten the Afrikaner patriots, the men whose sacrifices helped to free you from British imperialism and to rule the country and for you in particular to become Head of this Dpt.
It is certainly unreasonable for any man to expect our people, to whom we are national heroes, persecuted for striving to win back our country, to forget us in our lifetime and at the height of the struggle for a free SA. Your people are slaughtering mine today and not a century and a half ago. It is present SA that is a country of racial oppression, imprisonment without trial, of torture and harsh sentences and the threat of internment camps lies not in the distant past but in the immediate future. How can our people ever forget us when we fight to free them from all these evils?
In SA as in many other countries various issues divide prisoners and officials. I do not agree with the policy of the Dpt of which you are Head. I detest white supremacy and will fight it with every weapon in my hands. But even when the clash between you and me has taken the most extreme form, I should like us to fight over our principles and ideas and without personal hatred, so that at the end of the battle, whatever the result might be, I can proudly shake hands with you, because I feel I have fought an upright and worthy opponent who has observed the whole code of honour and decency. But when your subordinates continue to use foul methods then a sense of real bitterness and contempt becomes irresistible.
The letter ends here. It is a mere summary and some important facts have been left out.
With regard to the question of correspondence, it may well be that this Dpt is only entitled to object to the actual contents of a letter and not to the writer as such. But I have no access to the complete Prisons Act and Rules and Regulations and none whatsoever to the Service Orders. Perhaps you would like to investigate the matter.
I almost forgot to tell you that on Sept 9 the C.O. informed me that he had received [a] letter from the COP dated Aug 26 in which the latter stated that he was satisfied that the administration on this island was acting properly and that he could not investigate the complaints of individual persons kept in custody in the country’s prisons. With this reply the COP has given his official blessing to the abuse of authority, systematic persecution and other irregularities mentioned in my letter of July 12.
Finally, I should like you to know that these instructions will only be cancelled by me either…under my signature or directly during an interview with a representative of your firm.
Yours sincerely
N R Mandela 466/64
January 1977
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From a letter smuggled from prison to lawyers in Durban, dated January 1977
.
‘Old and famous horses keel over like many that went before, some to be forgotten forever and others to be remembered as mere objects of history, and of interest to academicians only.’
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1. FROM A LETTER TO ARCHIE GUMEDE, DATED 1 JANUARY 1975
Old and famous horses keel over like many that went before, some to be forgotten forever and others to be remembered as mere objects of history, and of interest to academicians only.
2. FROM HIS UNPUBLISHED AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL MANUSCRIPT WRITTEN IN PRISON
(1) A story of one’s life should deal frankly with political colleagues, their personalities and their views. The reader would like to know what kind of person the writer is, his relationships with others and these should emerge not from the epithets used but from the facts themselves. (2) But an autobiography of a freedom fighter must inevitably be influenced by the question whether the revelation of certain facts, however true they may be, will help advance the struggle or not. If the disclosure of such facts will enable us to see problems clearly and bring nearer our goal then it is our duty to do so, however much such revelations may adversely affect the particular individuals concerned. But frankness which creates unnecessary tensions and divisions which may be exploited by the enemy and retard the struggle as a whole, is dangerous and must be avoided. (3) The utmost caution becomes particularly necessary where an autobiography is written clandestinely in prison, where one deals with political colleagues who themselves live under the hardships and tensions of prison life, who are in daily contact with officials who have a mania for persecuting prisoners. Writing under such conditions the temptation is strong to mention only those things which will make your fellow prisoners feel that their sacrifices have not been in vain, that takes their minds away from the grim conditions in which they live and that makes them happy and hopeful. An essential part of that caution and fair play would be to have the widest possible measure of consultation with your colleagues about what you intend to say about them, to circulate your manuscript and give them the opportunity of stating their own views on any controversial issue discussed so that the facts themselves may accurately reflect the standpoints of all concerned; whatever may be the comments of the writer on those facts. Unfortunately the conditions in which I have written this story, especially security considerations, made it impossible to consult any but a handful of my friends.
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3. FROM HIS UNPUBLISHED AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL MANUSCRIPT WRITTEN IN PRISON
(15) The spotlight has focused on a few well known figures amongst us such as Wilton Mkwayi, Billy Nair, Raymond Mhlaba, Ahmed Kathrada, Govan Mbeki and Walter Sisulu.
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This is but natural because they are amongst our leading men in the country, admired by hundreds of thousands of people here and abroad for their courage and dedication. All of them are cheerful and optimistic and have been a source of inspiration to all my fellow prisoners. They are amongst those in prison who have helped to keep our members constantly aware of the noble tradition associated with the Congress Movement.
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But this is only part of the story. Every [one] of our men is like a brick which makes up our organisation and there are men in the Main Section who, whilst we here deal with about 20 men, have handled greater and more delicate problems affecting several hundred men coming from all walks of life, the overwhelming majority of whom get no visits, no letters, have no funds to study, cannot read or write and who are constantly subjected to all the cruelties of prison life.
4 FROM HIS UNPUBLISHED AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL MANUSCRIPT WRITTEN IN PRISON
Walter [Sisulu] and Kathy [Kathrada] share one common feature which forms an essential part of our friendship and which I value very much – they never hesitate to criticise me for my mistakes and throughout my political career have served as a mirror through which I can see myself. I wish I could tell you more about the courageous band of colleagues with whom I suffer humiliation daily and who nevertheless deport themselves with dignity and determination. I wish I could relate their conversations and banter, their readiness to help in any personal problem suffered by their fellow prisoners so that you could judge for yourself the calibre of the men whose lives are being sacrificed on the fiendish altar of colour hatred.
5. FROM A LETTER TO WINNIE MANDELA IN KROONSTAD PRISON, DATED 1 FEBRUARY 1975
Incidentally, you may find that the cell is an ideal place to learn to know yourself, to search realistically and regularly the process of your own mind and feelings. In judging our progress as individuals we tend to concentrate on external factors such as one’s social position, influence and popularity, wealth and standard of education. These are, of course, important in measuring one’s success in material matters and it is perfectly understandable if many people exert themselves mainly to achieve all these. But internal factors may be even more crucial in assessing one’s development as a human being. Honesty, sincerity, simplicity, humility, pure generosity, absence of vanity, readiness to serve others – qualities which are within easy reach of every soul – are the foundation of one’s spiritual life. Development in matters of this nature is inconceivable without serious introspection, without knowing yourself, your weaknesses and mistakes. At least, if for nothing else, the cell gives you the opportunity to look daily into your entire conduct, to overcome the bad and develop whatever is good in you. Regular meditation, say about 15 minutes a day before you turn in, can be very fruitful in this regard. You may find it difficult at first to pinpoint the negative features in your life, but the 10th attempt may yield rich rewards. Never forget that a saint is a sinner who keeps on trying.
6. FROM A LETTER TO MRS D B ALEXANDER, DATED 1 MARCH 1976
One of my favourite hobbies is to examine all the cards I’ve received during the previous year and only the other day, I was looking at the one you sent me last Dec[ember]. It contains only 4 printed words to which you added 3 in a clear and bold script. That economy in words is characteristic of all the seasonal messages I’ve received from you and yet they’re full of warmth and inspiration and each time they come I feel younger than kleinseun [grandson] Leo.
7. FROM A LETTER TO ZAMILA AYOB, DATED 30 JUNE 1987
I once wrote to Zami during the early seventies what I considered to be a romantic letter; from a man who adored and worshipped his beloved wife. In the course of that letter I remarked that Zeni and Zindzi had grown beautifully and that I found it a real pleasure to chat with them. My beloved wife was furious and, when I reached the last line of her letter, I felt that I was very fortunate to be so far from her physically. Otherwise I would have lost my jugular vein. It was as if I had committed treason. She reminded me: ‘I, not you, brought up these children whom you now prefer to me!’ I was simply stunned.
8. FROM THE UNPUBLISHED SEQUEL TO HIS AUTOBIOGRAPHY
My training and experience as a practicing lawyer in South Africa’s biggest city, Johannesburg, sensitized me at an early age in my political career to what was going on inside the corridors of power in our country. This early experience was reinforced during my imprisonment on Robben Island.
At that time prison warders were by no means the best-educated section of the community. The majority was hostile to our aspirations and regarded every black prisoner as sub-human. They were intensely racist, cruel and crude in dealing with us.
There were notable exceptions amongst them, who patiently warned their colleague[s] that in other parts of the world, liberation movements frequently won against their oppressors and became themselves rulers. These progressive warders urged that prisoners should be treated strictly according to regulations and well, so that in due course [if] they won and became [the] government they should in turn treat whites well.
The ANC [African National Congress] has always stressed the principle that we were fighting not against whites as such, but against white supremacy, a policy that is fully reflected in the racial composition of the principal structures of the organisation and government nationally, provincially and [on] local levels.
Not all my fellow prisoners had had the opportunity to be acquainted with the affairs of government departments at that time. Some of the most influential amongst us seriously doubted whether dialogue with the apartheid regime was a feasible option.
9. CONVERSATION WITH RICHARD STENGEL ABOUT HIS PROMOTION TO A HIGHER GRADE IN PRISON
4
STENGEL: So why were you the first?
MANDELA: Well, you know, it’s just a question of good relationships with the authorities…Although they fought with us, I kept a good relationship because I wanted to be able to go [to them]…to discuss a problem. Because I was worried by people, both in the main section – people you have no contact with – and in our group, in our section; and they worried me about all sorts of problems, some very serious, which had to be solved and quite apart, you know, from the general problems of policy…and practice…And, therefore, I kept a good relationship with them, even with Aucamp and of course the Commissioner General Steyn…But I fought them on questions of principle, and when they did something wrong, I fought them.
10. FROM A CONVERSATION WITH RICHARD STENGEL ABOUT PRISON WARDERS
I don’t want us to create the impression that
all
the warders were just animals, rogues, no.
Right
from the beginning, there were warders who felt that we should be treated correctly…Without boasting, you see, they normally came, especially during weekends and in the evenings, to talk to me. And…some of them were
really
good men. And expressed their views uncompromisingly about the treatment we were receiving. And, and we picked this up now, when we came to know the warders and the officers…that there was a
serious
argument amongst warders. Some saying, ‘We can’t afford to treat people like this. We must treat them decently. We must give them newspapers; we must give them radios.’ And the others say[ing], ‘No, if you do that, you are building up their morale. Don’t do that.’ They say, ‘Even so, they’ll still be on the Island.’ And so that argument was going on. Now to see…this division amongst warders, we decided, after some time, to go on…a go-slow strike…we used to take about a
whole
morning, loading one load…They tried
everything
and we would not budge. But there was a chap called Sergeant Opperman, he would call us together and say, ‘Gentlemen, it rained last night and the roads were washed away. I want lime so as to repair the roads. I want five loads today, lorry-loads. Can you help me?’ Now, the fact that the chap called us together and addressed us as gentlemen, would, you know, make us feel that we should help this man and we would fill those five lorries, you see, hardly in an hour’s time. And once he goes, we go back to [the] go-slow strike.
Now…
this
chap was not only courteous, but when he was on duty in the kitchen, we would get our rations…In the kitchen there was a
lot
of smuggling. Taking our meat, our sugar and so on. And
this
Sergeant would make sure that we [got] our ration[s]. So we respected him. Now there were
many
warders with that approach. And so although we had serious difficulties, there were bright moments where some warders would treat you, you know, as human beings.
11. CONVERSATION WITH RICHARD STENGEL
STENGEL: Some of the warders participated in political discussions with you?
MANDELA: Oh yes, yes. Oh quite a lot. Generally, you know, there were some sharp chaps and who were engaged in discussions. And as a result of those discussions, they became
very
friendly to us –
very
,
very
friendly. Some of them, I’m friendly with them now, still.
STENGEL: And how did they start participating? They listened and then they started giving their opinions also?
MANDELA: Well, they asked us questions. As far as I was concerned, I never started a political discussion with any warder. I listened to them. You are more effective if you are responding to a person who wants to make enquiries. When the information is volunteered gratuitously, some people resent that and you are not effective. It’s better to keep your distance. But when somebody asks, ‘What exactly do you want?’ because that’s how they normally asked: ‘Just tell me, what do you want?’ And then you explain. ‘Well you have enough food and [you] worry about these things? Why create such difficulties, miseries for the country, attacking innocent people, murdering them?’ And then you have a chance of explaining and saying, ‘No, you don’t know your own history. When you were oppressed by the English, you did exactly as we did. And that is the lesson of history.’
12. CONVERSATION WITH RICHARD STENGEL
STENGEL:…Mac Maharaj was talking about how you…in prison…used to represent other prisoners, and that was against regulations?
MANDELA: Yes, oh yes.
STENGEL: But eventually they allowed that?
MANDELA: Yes.
STENGEL: How did that happen?
MANDELA: No, by insisting and asserting your right. They had to accept. Because when a man fights, even the enemies, you know, respect you, especially if you fight intelligently…I say, ‘
This
is wrong; I have seen it. What are you going to do about it? Whether I have a right, you know, to speak for other prisoners, a crime, an offence has been committed and what are you going to do? You’re an officer: you have to do something about it. Very well, if you don’t want to do so, give me permission to write to your head office. And if your head office doesn’t assist me, I’ll write to the minister of justice. If the minister of justice doesn’t help me, then I will have exhausted the channels of complaint within the prison service. I’ll go outside.’ Now they feared that. They feared that…I was persistent, and there are cases where I took up the matter and eventually went to the minister of justice, and when
no
improvement happened, then I smuggled a letter out and reported the thing to the press. So when I went to them and I said, ‘If you don’t attend to this, I know what to do’…they feared because of previous experience. So in that way, you know, they allowed me to talk for other prisoners.