Conversations with Myself (27 page)

24 MARCH 1989

Visited by Mandla from 11.30 am to 1.30 pm.
⁶⁹
Brought Sakharov Award. Scroll and cheque and medal

25 MARCH 1989

Visited by Wonga [K D Matanzima], Mafu and their wives.
⁷⁰
R400 from Wonga and R200 from Mafu. Picked up a further R5 from bathroom.

26 MARCH 1989

Visited by Mandla from 11.10 am to 12.50 pm. Given him R400 in addition to the R90 given to him on 24.3.89

30 MARCH 1989

Visited by Mrs Engelbrecht and Mr Nel from First National Bank, Paarl. Letter to Shenge [Mangosuthu Buthelezi] handed in for posting today. Amended in terms of request from prison authorities.

21 APRIL 1989

57 birthday cards issued by the Labour Party in London handed in.

31 MAY 1989

Zami arrives at gate unexpectedly. Request she should come with Zindzi.

8 JUNE 1989

Visited by Amina and Yusuf Cachalia for 3 hrs.

9 JUNE 1989

Visited by Gen. W. [Willemse] and exchanged views on an important matter.

14 JUNE 1989

Visited by Mike Rossouw.

Advised to have no visits until 24th of this month

15 JUNE 1989

Visited by Xhamela [Walter Sisulu] for about 1½ hrs.

20 JUNE 1989

Advised that the plan has fallen through.

26 JUNE 1989

Visited by Gen. Willemse and another from 9.am to 11.45.

4 JULY 1989

Crucial meeting with Min K.C. [Kobie Coetsee]

5 JULY 1989

Meeting with very important person – no politics discussed.

B.P. 7 am 170/100 3.45 pm 160/90.

11 JULY 1989

BP. 7 am 180/90 2.30 pm 210/90 Visited by G.W. [General Willemse] and 2 others. Visited by Chief MB Joyi and his brother for ±3 hrs

13 JULY 1989

BP. 7 am 160/80 3.45 pm: 170/90

Visited by Mrs Helen Suzman.

14 JULY 1989

Visited by Kathy [Kathrada], Mpandla [Mlangeni], Mokoni [Motsoaledi], Ndobe [Mhlaba] and Xhamela [Sisulu].

18 JULY 1989

BP 170/80 7 am 71st birthday. Visited by Zami and all the children and grandchildren save Zeni family and Isaac.

19 JULY 1989

Drove out from 10.15 am to 3.45 pm.

2 AUGUST 1989

Visited by comrades from Pollsmoor and Robben Island for 5 hrs

3 AUGUST 1989

Visited by Fatima [Meer] from 9.15 am to 3.45 pm

4 AUGUST 1989

Visited by Mrs Stella Sigcau from 10 am to 3.30 pm
⁷¹

8 AUGUST 1989

Visited by Chiefs Zanengqele Dalasile and Phathekile Holomisa

10 AUGUST 1989

Visited by Mamphela Ramphele for 3 hrs.
⁷²

11 AUGUST 1989

Meeting for 3 hrs with Oscar Mpetha at Pollsmoor.
⁷³

12 AUGUST 1989

Report that OR had stroke, flown to London.

Zeni and children fail to turn up.

13 SEPTEMBER 1989

Visited by Kgatho, Zondi, Mandla and Ndaba
⁷⁴

20 SEPTEMBER 1989

BP. 7 am 165/90 3.45 pm 160/80

Mr F.W. de Klerk inaugurated as new State President
⁷⁵

10 OCTOBER 1989

BP. 180/90 Announcement of intended release of Tyhopho and others.
⁷⁶

Visited by Kgatho 7.15 to 8.30 am

Visited by Ministers Coetsee and Dr G Viljoen.
⁷⁷

11 OCTOBER 1989

Chest and leg xrays by Dr Kaplan. Climbed Paarl Rock.

13 OCTOBER 1989

Visited by Jeff Masemola from 10.45 to 4 pm
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16 OCTOBER 1989

Visited by Rochelle
⁷⁹

18 OCTOBER 1989

Visited by 7 relatives and friends from Thembuland.

19 OCTOBER 1989

Visited by four relatives and friends: Zami delivers note

26 OCTOBER 1989

Spoke to Cyril and Murphy
⁸⁰

29 OCTOBER 1989

National welcome rally for the 7 released prisoners plus Govan [Mbeki]

31 OCTOBER 1989

Visited by Zami, Zindzi and baby from 9 am to 5 pm.

10 NOVEMBER 1989

Visited by 5 Robben Islanders from 11 am to 4 pm.

28 NOVEMBER 1989

Mary Benson’s 70th Birthday
⁸¹

13 DECEMBER 1989

Met State President F.W. de Klerk for 2 hrs 55 m

29 DECEMBER 1989

BP 7 am 160/90 8.30 am 140/80 4 pm 160/80

Visited by Laloo Chiba, Reggie Vandeyar and Shirish Nanabhai
⁸²

30 DECEMBER 1989

Spoken to Xhamela and Ntsiki
⁸³

31 DECEMBER 1989

BP 7 am 155/80 3.45 pm 140/80
Trouser size 87R/34R
Style 8127

Mandela’s stay in the house in Victor Verster Prison was a time of transition between imprisonment and freedom. Dated
13 January
1990, this is the very last diary entry he made while in prison.

Flock of ducks walks clumsily into the lounge and loiter about apparently unaware of my presence. Males with loud colours, but keeping their dignity and not behaving like playboys. Moments later they become aware of my presence. If they got a shock they endured it with grace. Nevertheless, I detect some invisible feeling of unease on their part. It seems as if their consciences are worrying them, and although I feared that very soon their droppings will decorate the expensive carpet, I derive some satisfaction when I notice that their consciences are worrying them. Suddenly they squawk repeatedly and then file out. I was relieved. They behave far better then my grandchildren. They always leave the house upside down.

The years after Nelson Mandela’s release from prison were extremely cluttered for him. He was preoccupied with organising the African National Congress, conducting negotiations, preparing for the elections, governing as president, travelling the world as the most celebrated leader of his age, and all the while coping with the pain of his divorce from Winnie. A private man even in his private life, he found it difficult to talk about personal relationships. His time was seldom his own. This is reflected in the series of notebooks he kept during the period. Aside from the lengthy ‘minutes’ he wrote during meetings, the entries are a staccato representation of day-to-day events.

The period 1990–94 was one of blood and fear in South Africa. Thousands died in political violence. Massacres, like those at Sebokeng, Boipatong and Bisho, were common. Throughout, there was a palpable fear of a right-wing, military-backed coup. Pragmatism drove the negotiations and the policy of reconciliation. The conversations Mandela had with Richard Stengel and Ahmed Kathrada for his authorised book projects took place at the same time that he was either keeping the country together (before April 1994) or actually running it (from May 1994). One day he witnesses the brutal effects of violence with his own eyes; the next, he is in quiet and studied contemplation of the past. While he probably enjoyed the conversations and often chuckled or laughed (on one occasion he looked down and said ‘[I have] reversed my socks’), he also yawned fairly frequently and once complained that he could not keep his eyes open.

Nelson Mandela’s remembrance of his prison years is not without nostalgia. The routine. The camaraderie. The lessons learned. The time for reading and study. The time for writing letters. For contemplation. In a twist of irony, though, he has remained, in a sense, a prisoner. Frequently over the years since his release he has teased visitors and guests with the comment that he is still not free, while pointing a finger at his personal assistants: ‘And these are my jailers.’