Convictions: Kelly and Stephen (9 page)

Then there’s his mysterious past.  He’s got a degree from Stanford, so what’s he doing up here welding, and what happen to drive him away from home.  Plus there was some tragic event involving a girlfriend while in his twenties.  Lastly it seems that he knew quite a bit about me long before I knew anything at all about him.  He’s even got several of my books which he’s obviously read!  I just can’t figure him out at all.”

“Kelly, I don’t know much about him either.  He’s a good customer and a real nice guy as far as I have seen; a real stand up sort of guy.  His word and his money are good around here and he speaks his mind when he needs to.  But I’m not one to listen to gossip, especially when it comes from the likes of Alice. 

As for what he knew about you, that might be in part my fault.  He did ask about you after the first or maybe second time he saw you here.  He was in my office to settle up an account and asked me if you were married.  I told him the basics, not married, author, that kind of thing but I don’t make a habit of sharing what I know about my employees, and friends, with others. 

You know you are Hanlon’s token celebrity.  There are many people in town who would relish the opportunity to boast about you and how they know you whenever given the chance.  I’m sure he had no problem finding out what he wanted to know around here.  Besides, if I were you girl I’d be flattered.  It’s obvious that his questions about you were fueled by his interest in you.  But I guess by now you’d know about that interest for yourself.”  Again he winked. 

Kelly sighed “yes, I guess you are right, I mean the part about him having no problem finding someone around here to fill him in on me.”

“My best advice to you Kelly is that if you have questions you need answered about the man, then talk to the man himself.  Only Stephen can give you the truth that you need.”

“Yes, that would be the most logical thing to do.  You are so smart Bill, that’s why I always wind up at your door step when I’ve got something that I can’t wrap my brain around!  I value your friendship so much.”

“No, not smart Kelly but I do live my life by one basic rule, trust only what I see and feel, not what I hear from others.  Makes life a lot less complicated that way.”

“Thanks again Bill.  I won’t take up any more of your time, today anyway!”

Kelly gave Bill a hug as she left his office and said hello to a couple of people she knew on her way out of the store.  Pointing her Jeep in the direction of the Kramer’s she was anxious to be back on her way. 

At the Kramer’s, Kelly found an out of breath Max, tired from his many attempts to stay out of the way of a curious puppy.  He eagerly jumped into the back of the Jeep when Kelly opened the hatch.  She laughed at his obvious discomfort, said her thanks and goodbyes to Will and his mom, and started up the Jeep with a promise to visit again the next time she was in town.

After a brief stop at the market she was on her way back to Stephen’s.  During the trip home she made a vow to herself that she would heed Bill’s advice.  She would disregard whatever gossip that Alice and others might wish to share with her, and give Stephen the benefit of the doubt. That would be the least he deserved from her.

Kelly pulled in the drive to find Stephen’s truck gone.  She took the groceries to the kitchen and while putting them away found a note on the counter from him.  He had gone out for bit to help one of the neighbors with a broken barn door and would be back by dinner. 

She made herself a sandwich and read the letter from home.  Nothing new, just gossip.  Her younger brother has lost another job; nothing new there.  Other than that, everyone was fine.  Her mother wanted to know how the two weeks with Charlie went, and when Kelly might be able to come home for a visit; it had been nearly two years.  Kelly would answer her by the end of the week.

She went to the living room and sat in her favorite chair.  This would be the perfect time to get back on track with her writing.  Stephen wouldn’t be home until dinner which would give her three or four uninterrupted hours to review her last chapter and work out where the storyline would go from there.  Fifteen minutes later she still hadn’t moved.  The view from this chair out over the back yard and mountain range beyond was so mesmerizing that she couldn’t pull herself away.  Thirty minutes later she stood, retrieved her laptop and sat back down but an hour later she still hadn’t opened the lid.  This was useless. 

She was unable to force her brain away from her own life and into the lives of the characters she had left hanging for what now had been six weeks.  Six weeks since she had added a word to her story.  Today was obviously not going to be the day to re-start her career. 

Kelly thought about her clothes in the bedroom, still in boxes and decided to complete the process of moving in today, saving her work for tomorrow.  Having finally made a decision gave her the motivation to get up out of the chair.  She stashed her laptop under the chair, and moved into the bedroom to get started.

With hands on her hips she stood in front of the open closet, surveying its contents.  Fitting her clothes into Stephen’s space wasn’t going to be an easy task.  It wasn’t that he had many clothes himself, but space, especially storage space, in this cabin was at a premium.  It was obvious to her now that Stephen’s initial decision to buy this cabin and fix it up was based on his needs alone, with little concern about the need to someday share the space with a female.

She began by trying to organize Stephen’s belongings within the closet.  As had been the case with his books, Stephen did not appear to have any order to his clothes.  Where ever an item landed is where it stayed.  She started by pulling out non-clothes items and depositing them on the bed.

There was a small shoe box on the floor near the back.  It was obvious from its weight that it did not contain shoes so for now she placed it against the wall with the two shoe boxes she had brought.  Neither of hers contained shoes either, but rather held a collection of memories; letters from home, photos, and Charlie’s birth announcement.  Things she rarely looked at but couldn’t bear to part with.  These two boxes represented the sum total of her life’s important events to date. 

Next she pulled out his shoes and placed them with hers.  Neither of them had many pairs, six between the two of them; sneakers, hiking boots, and snow boots.  They each had a pair of high rubber boots for extreme mud and rain also but with the recently wet spring those were currently stored downstairs, next to the front door under Stephen’s coat rack. 

Kelly replaced their shoes and boots on the floor of the closet in neat, orderly fashion, his on the right, and hers on the left.  She then went to work arranging his clothes.  When his hanging items were all hung in order on the right side of the rod, there was enough room available on the left side for her to hang several things.  She hadn’t brought much anyway and as with the shoes, an Alaska life style didn’t call for a large variety.  She hung her jeans and flannel shirts, then added the short sleeve t-shirts that she had brought for the expected warm days to come. 

When she finished with all of the hanging items she still had an entire shelf across the top available to work with.  Neatly folding her half dozen sweaters and few sweatshirts she stacked them on the left hand side of the top shelf.  In Stephen’s case a quick look at his clothes piled on the bed told her that he wasn’t a fan of sweaters, preferring hooded sweatshirts instead.  She folded his sweatshirts and neatly stacked them on the right side of the top shelf, leaving just enough room on either end for each of their memory boxes.               

She couldn’t remember the last time she had looked in her shoe boxes and needed to take a quick stroll down memory lane now, while she had the time, before putting the boxes up on the shelf.  Sitting in the middle of the bed she opened the first.  It contained many letters, most of them from her mom. 

When she had first told her parents that she was moving to Alaska her mom was horrified.   In her world, young single women didn’t go to Alaska, at least not without a male escort.  Alaska was made of wilderness, not civilized communities.  It was dominated by unruly, impolite men who used women for their own carnal pleasure.  And there were the bears.  Her mom was convinced that Kelly was either going to perish, or return to Seattle within a month.  

Kelly scanned the letters humorously remembering that the first few from her mom were rambling gossip columns referencing only the news around Seattle such as who was getting married or divorced, and plans for Christmas.  There was no mention of Alaska or Kelly’s move, and no questions about how she was settling in.  It was as if her mother was refusing to recognize the fact that Kelly was in Alaska and not just across town.

It wasn’t until the fifth letter that she dared to ask how Kelly was doing and if she had found a place to live, despite the fact that Kelly has already sent her the new address.  Now, after five years, the letters from her mom came about once a month, and are matter of fact with respect to her new home town.  Try as she might, though, Kelly had not been able to convince her parents to even think about a visiting her here.  Maybe if they knew about Stephen the curiosity would draw them up.

Underneath the letters she found her high school and college diplomas folded in quarters.  She had been fresh out of high school when she and Scott had married but she had been determined not to let marriage interfere with her B.A. in English Literature, even though it had taken her six years to achieve it.  She had been two years into it when she found out she was pregnant, and it took her two years after Charlie was born to get back on track.  If it hadn’t been for the time away from home, obtaining a degree while holding down a job, and caring for a child, she might have found out much sooner that her marriage was doomed. 

Under the diplomas she found the newspaper clipping with Charlie’s birth announcement that had run in the Seattle Times.  She read the clipping, reminiscing on how very special that day had been to her.  For the first time in her life she had felt like a real adult.  She wiped a tear away and repacked the contents of the box.

Reaching for the second box, she expected to find her family photos, mainly of Charlie when he was little. Lifting the lid Kelly realized immediately that she had selected Stephen’s box instead of her own.  She probably would have replaced the lid immediately and set the box aside, had it not been for the newspaper clipping that was face up on top.

An engagement announcement titled “July Wedding Planned for Bascom/Long” was placed above a faded picture of a lovely smiling young woman standing behind and with her arms possessively draped around the shoulders of a younger and somewhat thinner, Stephen.  Kelly carefully picked up the clipping, unfolded it and scanned the typical text below which noted the proud parents, educational background of both bride and groom to be, and current employment status.  Bride Amanda was a newly christened elementary school teacher while groom Stephen, a recent engineering graduate from Stanford, had just accepted a position with a prestigious engineering firm in Eugene.  Obviously this is the Amanda referenced by Uncle Marv.  She was indeed very beautiful, obvious even given the faded yellow paper.

Coming across that announcement so unexpectedly left Kelly feeling a little shocked, but when she refolded it to place it back in the box the next announcement she found had her head reeling.  Directly underneath their engagement announcement had been an Obituary announcement for one Amanda Marie Bascom, beloved fiancée of Stephen Long, Springfield.  Both announcements had been published in the Springfield Times, less than five weeks apart.

All Kelly could think about is how horrible this must have been for Stephen.  To be so happy and in love, with an incredibly bright future ahead, and then to lose it all in a matter of five weeks is an unthinkable tragedy.  No wonder he had spent so many years buried in the isolation of Alaska.  Such a horrific tragedy would have sent many stronger men over the brink of despair.  She wanted to hold him and assure him that he would never suffer like that again.

Scanning the obituary Kelly could find no cause for Amanda’s death, only that it had been “sudden” and “tragic” however the third clipping in the box provided a tiny bit more detail.  It was a newspaper article written about the accident and describing the police investigation.  Amanda had apparently slipped and fallen off of a steep rock ledge while hiking.  Police declined to provide any more details as the investigation was still active and the case still open.  They stopped short however of ruling it an accident.  The lead detective, a Detective Timothy O’Brien, stated that he hadn’t ruled out foul play and wouldn’t until they were able to interview a key witness, someone who was being classified as a “person of interest”.

Accidentally opening the wrong box was one thing but reading the personal mementos of her new love left her stomach churning with guilt.  Rather than seeing any more of the boxes’ contents she replaced the clippings, put the lid back on.  She slid the box to the extreme right side of the top shelf, on his side, behind his sweatshirts hoping that he would never notice that it had been moved.  With any luck at all he had forgotten that it even existed.

Kelly finished putting away the last of the items, picked up her empty boxes and took them out to the trash, continuing to feel remorse for her complete lack of good judgment.  She noted the time, calculating that she most likely still had another hour or so to regain her composure before Stephen would return.  After pouring a glass of wine she returned to sit and once again take in the view.  But the spectacular view was not in the forefront of her mind.

The articles had all been dated some sixteen years ago and although she didn’t know his exact birth date Stephen had once mentioned being in his early forties.    That would have made him in his late twenty’s when Amanda died.  Stephen told her he had moved to Alaska ten years ago.  What had happened during those years after her death that had caused him to throw away his life in Oregon, and a promising career to move here?  Was he escaping a past he couldn’t deal with, just like she had done when she moved here? 

Although what she had been escaping was trivial compared to the unspeakable pain through which he must have suffered.  Hopefully some day they would be close enough so that Stephen would feel comfortable in opening up to her.  She knew that she could help heal him if he were to give her the chance.  One thing was definite though, Kelly was the first woman Stephen had chosen to love since Amanda. She had pried into his soul enough for one day; she would not again unless it was by his choice.

***

Dinner preparations were well under way when Stephen returned home at ten minutes to six.  He emerged from the bedroom showered, bare-chested and dressed only in a pair of flannel lounging pants.  Smiling broadly he commented on how much better the closet looked and that he could actually now find his clothes.  But Kelly was having a hard time concentrating on his words when all she wanted to do was splay her hands across that bare chest.

The top was popped from an ice cold beer and her wine glass refilled, they both moved into the great room to sit and talk until dinner was ready.  Kelly filled Stephen in on the revised dates contained within her new contract.  She also sheepishly admitted that the reason the closet looked so nice was because she had no luck in restarting her creative writing earlier in the day.

Stephen laughed stating that tomorrow was another day.  He also noted that he too had run into work related obstacles that day and despite tomorrow being a Saturday he would have to go back over to finish the job.

After dinner that sat quietly in front of the fire, both lost in thoughts of their own but content to be together.  Later that night, with their passion and desire for each other at least temporarily satisfied, Kelly pulled Stephen close, cupped his handsome face in her hands and said “Stephen, I love you too.” 

His eyes searched hers for the truth behind her words.  He held her tight long into the night.  This was the happiest he could ever remember being.