Read Courageous Love: A Christian Romance Novel (The Hawaii Love Series, #1) Online
Authors: Kelsey MacBride
Tags: #Christian, #Romance, #contemporary, #religious, #inspirational, #suspense, #women's
She searched in the downtown area that she had frequented in the several years she had lived in Newport Beach with Justin. There were art galleries, skateboard shops, restaurants, boutiques and coffee shops. Michelle spent several days filling out applications only to be told she wasn’t qualified. Really? she thought. How qualified do you have to be to serve food or sell clothes?
The days stretched into weeks, and as the weather warmed, the surfers and tourists began streaming into the city in droves. Michelle knew it was hiring season and hit all of the employers one more time in a desperate attempt to secure work. She finally landed a waitressing job at The Beach Brew, the local coffee shop. It didn’t pay much, but it paid. And Michelle knew that if she kept her expenses low, she would be able to get by until something better came along.
Three years after Michelle started at the coffee shop, her something better finally came along. Two gentlemen were having a business meeting of sorts and Michelle was their waiter. She didn’t think that they were paying any attention to her, but when they were ready to pay the bill, they called her over. After some small talk, they told her they were recruiters for New Life Pharmaceutical and had been watching her with the customers. They were impressed with her friendly attitude, her ability to sell the items on the menu and the fact that even though she was only a waitress in a coffee shop, she came across as very professional.
After the sting of the “only a waitress in a coffee shop” comment had worn off, Michelle began listening. She agreed to meet the men after her shift to find out more. By the end of the week, Michelle had left Beach Brew and embarked on her new career as a sales representative for New Life Pharmaceuticals. Within four short years, she had risen to the top, upgraded her apartment and fallen in love. Everything was going great until New Life introduced Abstinze, the new pill designed to reduce a man’s sexual urges. Michelle had no problem selling the heart medication, the diabetic medication and all of the other supplements designed to improve people’s quality of life, but Abstinze was different.
She wasn’t sure if it was because it was a sexual medication, or actually, an anti-sexual medication, or if she wasn’t successful selling it because it required that men be willing to stay faithful to their spouses. Either way, she was hitting wall after wall and her sales numbers were dropping rapidly. Michelle looked through her windshield, past the cars in the parking lot to the large steeple across the street. It had been a long time since she had been to church. Even longer since she had really talked to God. Something stirred in her again as another wave of nausea swept over her. She started the car and turned the air on full blast just as her phone started ringing.
“Hi Stan,” she said to her supervisor, dreading the impending conversation. She listened to him rattle on, not having the desire or energy to interrupt him with her less than thrilling news.
“Listen, Michelle,” Stan continued. “I’ve been carrying you because you are my top rep. Well, you
were
my top rep.” Michelle closed her eyes and rested her head against the leather headrest. “But lately, I don’t know, you have really slacked off.”
Michelle wanted desperately to argue with Stan. She wanted to tell him that no, she hadn’t slacked off. In fact, she had been working harder than ever. She had been pushing and pushing, but no one was biting. Her calls had doubled and her sales had dropped by 50 percent. All while fighting some serious stomach bug. She felt the stinging of tears at the corner of her eyes. She wanted to tell Stan all of this. But she didn’t.
“Michelle, Michelle? Are you still there?” Stan practically yelled in the phone.
“Yes, I’m here,” she said, barely audible.
“Well, what are you going to do? You know I can’t keep you if you don’t make your quota. Even if I like you, ’cause I do. And even if I know you’re a great salesperson, ’cause you are. But you know I can’t keep dead weight around, right?”
Dead weight. What a delicate way to put it, Stan, thought Michelle, the tears leaving dark stains on her pink silk blouse. “Yes, I know that Stan,” she said, not wanting to fight. Why did she feel so sick and tired? Was it the job? Was she worn down because she was pushing something that she was morally and ethically against? Was she sick because the weather was warming up? Or was it the stress she had been experiencing with Luke lately?
Just the thought of Luke caused another wave of sweat to rise up in her. She loved Luke, she really did. But lately they had been less than close. It was as if they were drifting apart. After two years, she thought for sure they would be headed for the altar. She wanted to make it official. She wanted to do right by her Christian upbringing, even though she had strayed far from it. And somewhere deep inside of her, she wanted to do right by her father.
“I know Stan, I know. Listen,” Michelle cut him off. “I’ve got to go, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” She hung up the phone and sat in the cool car, waiting for her nerves and stomach to settle. The air conditioning dried the tears to her face. After several minutes of thinking about her job, Luke, and her father, Michelle decided to call it a day. She had one more appointment scheduled, but it was a drop-in that could be rescheduled. She chose instead to flee to the safety and comfort of her home where no one would bother her. But as she pulled her silver compact car into the large parking lot of her luxury apartment complex, her cell phone rang.
M
ichelle felt an ache in her gut, reluctantly reaching for her phone, thinking Stan was calling her back with more discouraging news. But when she saw that it was her best friend Tracy, she breathed a sigh of relief and answered the call. “Hey girlfriend, what’s up?”
“Hey Michelle, some of us are heading down to Senor Juan’s for a little dancing. Wanna come?”
“I don’t know, Tracy,” Michelle said as she took off her heels and got out of her car. “I’m just getting home now, let me call you as soon as I get settled.” Michelle hung up and approached the set of stairs that led to her apartment. She padded up the concrete stairs, shoes in her hands and discouragement in her soul. All she could think about was unwinding and finding something to settle her stomach. The last thing she wanted to do was go dancing with Tracy.
Michelle had met Tracy when she first arrived in Newport Beach. Tracy was a California native and looked it. She was tall, thin and blonde with the perfect bronzed body. Michelle, on the other hand, was short, athletic and brunette. Her mixed Caucasian and Hawaiian ethnicity blessed her with naturally tan skin, thick black hair and large brown eyes. Michelle had always liked her appearance and never felt different in Hawaii. It wasn’t until she discovered Justin’s weakness for cute California blondes that Michelle developed some insecurities.
At first glance, Tracy would have been exactly Justin’s type. Except she wasn’t. She was outspoken, strong-willed and fiercely independent. Justin wouldn’t have lasted a second with her. It was because of Tracy’s bubbly personality that the two of them met. Shortly before Justin and Michelle split up, Michelle tried a new yoga studio. After two hours of down-dogs, lotus positions and sun salutations, she was drenched and drained. The tall blond with perfect form, the same woman Michelle had been secretly jealous of, asked Michelle if she’d like to go get a smoothie at the organic juice bar across the street.
Even though Michelle and Tracy’s backgrounds couldn’t be any more different, the two became friends instantly. They spent several hours talking about themselves and sharing their life histories. By the time they parted ways, the sun had set and a new relationship had been born. Michelle had found in Tracy the family she had lost. She shared everything with her and leaned on her heavily during the breakup. They spoke daily and spent much of their free time together. But today, Michelle had other plans.
The bright afternoon sun and her tabby cat Menehune welcomed Michelle as she opened the door to her home. The tabby rubbed himself along her sweaty legs and purred loudly as Michelle closed the door to the world and escaped into her apartment. “Hello there,” she said, greeting the pet she had named after the mythological Hawaiian dwarves. “I missed you too,” she said as she threw her shoes and purse on the floor and plopped on the sofa with Mene.
The apartment wasn’t much, but it was home. The narrow front hall held a small coat closet and barely enough room for a little table. A few feet from the entrance was a small kitchen. It was newly remodeled and held all the conveniences Michelle needed, especially since she didn’t cook. To the left of the kitchen was a half bathroom and next to that, a door to her bedroom suite. The kitchen opened up to a decent sized living room and dining nook. The living room and bedroom each had two sliding doors to a narrow patio that ran the length of the apartment. If Michelle stood on her tippy toes and peeked over the top of the Hard Rock in the distance, she was just able to make out a beautiful Newport Beach sunset, maybe.
“Oh Mene,” Michelle said sadly, stroking the cat. “Looks like it’s dry food again this week.” She sat and thought about her situation. Maybe she could convince Stan to give her the Rejuvenate account. New Life had just acquired a new division of supplements that helped people age more gracefully. They were all natural and improved stamina, energy and vitality. They were easy to market, and Michelle believed in them. She was thinking about that when another wave of nausea overcame her. She stopped petting Mene and instantly put her hands on her flat stomach.
Why was she so sick? Michelle thought back to what she had eaten. Her diet was healthy, and in the past day she hadn’t had anything out of the ordinary. Luke and she had gone out to dinner the night before. Maybe that was it. They had tried a new restaurant, and Michelle wondered if she had a touch of food poisoning.
Luke.
Michelle felt the tension rise and her heart speed up. Things had been difficult lately. She thought Luke was the one and even though she had been intimate with him, she didn’t want to take the step to move in together until they were married. She wondered if leaving her Christian morals behind was causing her physical discomfort.
“Oh no,” she said out loud, suddenly realizing why she might be sick. Her mind began racing as she headed to the bathroom. She frantically dug around under the sink looking for the pregnancy test. She had bought a two-pack a few month before when she thought she might be pregnant. It was then, when the test turned up negative, that she began pressuring Luke to take the next step in their relationship. It was then, too, that things started changing in their relationship.
Michelle sat down on the toilet with the stick in hand. And then she did something she hadn’t in a long time. She prayed. “Dear God, please don’t let me be pregnant. I know I’ve gone against your will and I’m not being faithful to you. But God, please, please don’t burden me with a child out of wedlock.” She wanted to leave the test on the bathroom counter and pretend it wasn’t there, but before she could even get up, the test confirmed her fear. Two pink lines screamed up at her from her shaking hands. She leaned against the counter, trying to absorb what she was seeing. Thoughts of her father appeared in her head. The disgrace he felt when she eloped with Justin would be nothing to how he felt when he found out she was pregnant and unmarried.
“Michelle?” Luke’s voice called out from the kitchen and interrupted her thoughts. Michelle quickly put the test under the counter, washed her hands and went out to greet him, hoping her apprehension was well hidden.
“Hi honey, how was your day?” Michelle had given Luke a key to her apartment several month earlier, and he came and went as he pleased. She also had a key to his but preferred not leaving Mene so they often ended up at her place. Usually, this didn’t bother her at all. But lately, things had been so tense she wished she had more privacy. And on days like this, she could have used it.
“Um, hi,” she said, still trying to conceal her feelings. She was sure she was pregnant but unsure how she felt about that. And unsure how she felt about their relationship. After having Stan threaten her job and finding out she was going to be a mother, Michelle wasn’t sure she could handle much more. Luke walked past her in the hall, lightly planting a kiss on her cheek. He sat on the sofa, flipped on the television and opened his soda.
“So, you’ll never believe what happened to me today,” he began chatting.
Michelle thought wryly and then said, “Really? You’ll never believe what happened to ME today!” Still in shock, she went to the fridge, grabbed a drink and joined Luke on the sofa.
Luke didn’t seem to hear her and continued, “You know that listing, that listing I told you about in Orange County that could take me to the next level? Well, I got it!” He proudly pressed a finger into his chest. “It’s my first million-dollar property. I’m in! I’m finally on the way to selling luxury homes.” Michelle gave him a thin smile as she saw the look of arrogant confidence on his face. He continued, telling Michelle how excited he was that his career was finally moving forward. After a few moments, he took a long breath and looked at Michelle. “So, how was your day?”
“Well,” Michelle began, not sure what to say. “Actually, it was pretty crappy.” The words tumbled out of her mouth as she poured out the misfortunes of the day to Luke, voicing the difficulties she was having selling Abstinze and how Stan threatened her job. Michelle fought the urge to cry as the very real fear of being unemployed and pregnant crept into her mind. But a part of her trusted in Luke. Trusted that he would take care of her, especially since he was about to earn great money. She said a silent prayer, thanking God for putting Luke in her life and asking him to make Luke more receptive to the shocking news she was about to reveal.
“Well,” Luke said as Michelle readied herself to embrace the emotional support she so desperately needed. “I wouldn’t buy it either.”
Michelle relaxed her jaw in shock. “What? You wouldn’t buy Abstinze?” Although they had jokingly talked about the pill in the past, they had never discussed the reasoning behind it.