Cowboys & Kisses (5 page)

Wyatt was whacking wood posts into the ground.

Thump
.

With his shirt off. I rested my chin on my hands, staring.
Oh. My. God.

Thump
.

He was… He looked…

I don’t like him. I don’t like him. I don’t—

Thump.

Dax knocked on the door before sticking his head in. “You up?”

Maybe not. Wyatt. Looking like…
that?
This had to be a dream.

Thump
.

“Earth to Allie.” Dax attempted to control his amusement.

I tore my attention from the half-naked dream sweating outside my window and rolled onto my back. “I’m up…I think.” My chest felt heavy, hot, and my stomach was tight.

Thump
.

“Need a tissue?” Dax asked. “You’ve got a little drool
right
…there.” He pointed to the corner of his mouth.

“Shut up.” I sat up, rubbing a hand over my face, and glared at my brother. “What the hell is he doing? I was sleeping.” I tried to sound pissed. It was a lame attempt to distract my brother, but I didn’t have a choice. He’d give me so much shit if he knew I was…

I was what? Getting hot and bothered by a farm boy?

“Get dressed. I’ve got something to show you.” He winked. “Daylight’s a-wasting,” he said as he pulled the door shut.

“You did
not
just say that,” I called after him, smiling at his retreating laughter.
Daylight’s a-wasting?
Really?
Dax was going a little too native for me.

Thump
.

I turned back to see Wyatt straighten, stretch. My mouth went totally dry. He shifted the sledgehammer, his arms flexing in the rising sun. He rolled his neck, his shoulders rippled, and his stomach was…

I blew out a breath and jumped up, tugged on running clothes, and headed for the kitchen. Mom had left a note. Dad had left this morning and she’d be home later. She wanted my help at the clinic, if I was up for it. I dropped the note on the table and grabbed a banana.

“Allie?” Dax called out.

I pushed through the back screen door. “What?”

Dax waved me forward. “Come on.”

I went, trying not to stare at Wyatt. He was jaw-droppingly hot this close. And way more ripped than I’d imagined, lean and long and… He smiled at me, wiping his face on a large blue bandana before hanging it back on the fence.

I nodded at Wyatt, forcing myself not to stop and stare, and asked Dax, “What’s up?”

Dax smiled. “Get in the truck.”

I waited, hoping Dax would get in first, but no… He waited, putting me beside Wyatt again. I slid across the seat, just in time to see Wyatt pull his t-shirt on. Good. I
didn’t
really want to sit next to him half-naked or anything. I felt my heart pick up as he climbed into the truck, his thigh pressing against mine.
Yes, the shirt was a good thing.

We drove away from the house, stopping at the end of the fence line. Wyatt parked and Dax pointed. A wide path cut through the tall waving grass.

I leaned forward. “I didn’t see this yesterday.”

“It wasn’t here yesterday.” Dax laughed, getting out. I climbed out after him, totally confused. “Wyatt mowed it for you.”

Wait, what?
My heart was really going crazy now.
He did this for me?
I couldn’t
not
look at him now. He was still in the truck. His eyes traveled over my face, quickly, before he looked out his window.

I kept staring at him. He looked at me then, his forehead wrinkling. He looked…cautious.

“Th-thanks,” I managed.

He nodded and smiled the kind of smile that made time stand still. For that second, it was just me and him and that freaking amazing smile. That smile was for me…

I didn’t want that. Did I? I didn’t want anything to do with those honey-colored eyes or that super-hot, amazingly capable body. I swallowed and turned back to the path. A distraction…something to break the tension…

“Up for a race?” I blurted out, glancing at Dax, then Wyatt.

Wyatt was out of the truck before Dax answered.

“You’re in boots,” I pointed out.

“Then you might be able to beat me,” he answered.

I narrowed my eyes and glanced at Dax. Dax held his hands up. “I think I’m going to watch this time.” He shook his head. “Ready?”

I glanced at Wyatt. He winked. I laughed.
Dammit
.

“Go!” Dax yelled.

And we were running. I don’t know how he made it as far as he did. The grass was slick and he
was
in boots. But he made it all the way down the hill before he slipped and went down. I glanced back at him, lying in the grass, and turned around.

“Break anything?” I asked, offering him my hand.

He took my hand. “Nope.”

I helped him up, nervous. He stared down at me, took a step closer…
Dammit
. His hand squeezed mine, pulling me closer. I froze, pulling my hand from his. “Next time, wear running shoes.” I ran off, following my newly created track. I didn’t look back. I was too freaked out. My heart was going crazy and I felt…I felt happy. But I didn’t deserve to feel happiness.
Dammit
.

I wasn’t a good person. I’d done horrible things. That night…that night with Lindie… I felt a familiar coldness seep into my chest. It should have been me, not Lindie.

It’s my fault. My fault.

I ran until my lungs were on fire, then headed back to the house. I ignored Dax and Wyatt, refusing to slow down until I was inside. I
tore off my running clothes and jumped into the shower, turning the water as hot as I could get it. It burned, making my eyes ache.
No crying.

“No crybabies allowed, Allie
.” I could
hear
Lindie…remember how she’d tried to calm me down when I’d broken my wrist during a game. It had been bad, requiring three pins, but Lindie wouldn’t let me cry. “
Tough it out, Allie. Don’t let anyone see you cry. Especially not the boys. It’s nothing. You’re fine.”

We both knew it wasn’t fine. My hand was lopsided, hanging at an awkward angle, and I was close to passing out. I managed to brace it on the coach’s clipboard, while Lindie kept talking, trying to distract  me until my mom had pulled up the car and we’d driven to the ER. Even there, wanting to throw up and dizzy from pain, Lindie had almost made me laugh.
“You’re fine.”
She’d shaken her head, acting disappointed in me.
“I don’t see what all the fuss is about.”

I smiled at the memory. She’d been the last face I remembered seeing before they wheeled me into the OR. “I’m…I’m trying to be fine,” I said out loud, hating the tremor in my voice. “But I wish you were here.”

Lindie didn’t lie to me. She never had. She wouldn’t now. She wouldn’t tell me what happened was an accident. She’d tell me it was my fault and tell me to get over it. But I was the reason she wasn’t here. I was the reason she was gone forever.

“I’m so sorry…” I pressed my forehead against the shower tiles, letting the water pour over me until it was freezing cold and my teeth were chattering. I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower, shivering. I tugged on the white robe Lindie and I had stolen from the hotel room we’d shared during the playoffs and threw myself on my bed. Newspaper clippings and posters were tacked up on my walls, making me lonelier. Nothing like being reminded of everything that was gone.

My mother’s voice traveled up the stairs. “Allie?”

“In my room,” I answered. I heard her on the stairs, the squeaky board, and sat up, tugging my robe tighter around me.

“You didn’t just wake up, did you?” she asked as she came in the room. “It’s almost one.”

I shook my head. “I went for a run.” Did she know about the path?

She was surprised. “Good for you. Any chance you’d be willing to come down and help me at the clinic?”

I wrinkled my nose but saw something on her face that stopped me, like she was bracing for my answer—like she knew I’d give her some lame-ass excuse when there was no reason not to help her except that I didn’t want to. She was here too, just like Dax and me, dealing with redneck hell…

I stood up. “Give me a sec to get dressed?” First Dax, now Mom.
I’m losing my bitch-mystique.

Mom’s smile was pretty awesome. So was her relief. “I’ll make some lunch for the boys.” She paused at the door. “Is it just me, or is Dax becoming Wyatt Two?”

“Not just you.” I shook my head.
So not going to happen
. But I wasn’t going to say that out loud. Didn’t want her to read anything into it.

“He’s certainly a good guy. Wyatt, I mean. So sad he has so much responsibility at such a young age. I don’t know how he stays so…positive.” She pulled the door shut before I could ask her what she was talking about.

What did Wyatt have to be sad about? His ripped body? His booby truck? His mob of cowboy friends? Okay, his job sucked, but at least he had a job. He didn’t act sad. If anything, he was way too nice. But…was he really? A
good
guy? Or was he a guy that knew how to play nice until he got what he wanted? What
did
he want?

It didn’t matter. As long as he did what my parents needed, what did I care? I didn’t.

I tugged on denim shorts and a pink tank top, brushed through my hair and clipped the sides back, and dabbed on a touch of lip gloss. I stuck my tongue out at my reflection. I didn’t need to put myself together to go work at Mom’s place, but I wasn’t going to over-analyze why I was putting a little extra effort into my appearance.
Very little.

Dax and Wyatt were at the table when I came into the kitchen. Mom was pouring them lemonade and feeding them sandwiches. All in all, the kitchen was pretty quiet—just a lot of chewing.

“Dax says you guys have big plans on the horizon?” Mom asked when I came into the kitchen.

I glanced at Dax. “The things I do for my brother. I have zero interest.”

I loved it when my mom looked at me that way, like she was proud of me. “That’s sweet of you.”

Wyatt stood up, rinsing his plate at the sink. “You don’t have to go, Allie. Dax can ride with me.”

Wyatt was going?
Interesting
…

“No offense, Wyatt.” Dax leaned back in his chair, smiling. “But I don’t think Levi would be too happy.”

Wyatt nodded, the muscle in his jaw hardening for a minute. “Right. Levi.”

Wait a minute. Holy crap…

Wyatt’s jaw muscle flexed as he scrubbed the plate—the plate that looked clean.

Does…does Wyatt
like
me?
I swallowed, focusing on the rooster hotpad that hung on a hook by the sink.
No, not possible. Why would he? I’ve been a total bitch to him—to everyone. Not a chance.
Which was a good thing. He deserved way better.

I glanced over at Wyatt. His intense gaze was waiting for me. He grinned, the whole dimples thing super gorgeous.

Not that he needs to know that’s what I’m thinking.

I bit my lip and rolled my eyes. He chuckled, almost making me smile…until I noticed Mom and Dax were watching us closely.
Awesome
.

“I’m not going for some stupid…redneck,” I managed, my face hot. Wyatt didn’t seem fazed by my pathetic attempt at an insult. “Ready, Mom?”

“Yes.” She glanced at Wyatt, a slight smile on her face, all thoughtful—like she was working through what
this
might mean. “You boys need anything before we head out?”

Dax shook his head. “Nah, we’re good. Home for dinner?”

“Good point. Food.” Mom opened the refrigerator, stared inside, then closed it. “How about Allie and I bring something home?”

My cell phone rang, scaring the crap out of me. It had been confiscated, kept in a drawer. Reception was a nightmare out here, according to Dax. Mom pulled it out of the drawer, stared at the number, and handed it to me.

“Is it Mrs. Duncan?” I asked. Lindie’s mom called me at least once a week. I think we both needed to talk to each other, to miss Lindie without really talking about her. Probably not the healthiest thing to do—her calls made Mom and Dad uncomfortable.

“No. It’s Sebastian Kramer,” she said, watching me closely.

“Your old coach?” Dax voiced my shock.

I nodded, lifting the phone to my ear. “Hello?”

“Allie?” I could hear the smile in Sebastian’s voice. “How are you? Where are you?”

I walked out of the kitchen and into the living room to get away from Dax and Mom’s whispered conversation. It was so good to hear his voice. “We moved. Ever heard of Black Falls?”

“No.” He laughed. “Close to anything?”

“About an hour and a half from San Antonio.” I stared out the picture windows at the field. It looked a little greener. Maybe the rain had helped.

“I can drive that.” He paused. “I’m coming to see you, Allie. Your mom around? I have an opening on the team and we need you back, girl.”

“I can’t.” I wasn’t ready.

“I think I can convince your mom, Allie. You know how charming I can be.”

I forced myself to laugh. “Oh, I know. It’s just…
I
can’t.”

There was a long pause. I could almost hear Sebastian scrambling for an argument. He was very good at making people see that what he
wanted
to happen was what
needed
to happen. His voice was light, but there was an undeniable edge to it. “Ever hear that saying about falling off the horse?”

“I have.” I sighed. “A lot.”

“You think…you think this is what she’d want?”

My throat suddenly felt tight. “Please don’t.”

I heard him sigh. “Allie, she was your biggest fan. I know she’d give you grief about passing this up.”

“Sebastian…” I drew in a breath, hearing the tremor in my voice. “I
can’
t.”

“You
can
.” He kept going, not listening to me. No one ever listened to me. “She’d want you to.”

I snapped, finally. “Are you really trying to use my dead best friend to get me to play soccer for you?”